She Was As American As Apple Pie
Kristin Nelson had a picture-perfect California upbringing that went into overdrive when, as a teen, she merged with America's favorite family. From the outside, her marriage to TV star and heartthrob pop star Ricky Nelson seemed like everything that was good in America. But the truth was something very different. Following her perfect wedding, she would encounter addiction, tragedy, and a desperate struggle to keep her children. At the end of her life, it seemed that no one even cared.
Michael Ochs Archives / Stringer, Getty Images
1. She Had An Idyllic Childhood
What could be more of a California stereotype than having a dad who was a football star and a mom who was a model? Well, that’s how Kristin Harmon came into this world. She was born on June 25, 1945, in Burbank, California. Her parents were Heisman trophy winner Tom Harmon and model Elyse Knox.
Next, this California girl would meet up with the All-American family.
ABC Television Uploaded by We hope at en.wikipedia, Wikimedia Commons
2. She Met A Family
When Kristin was 12 years old, her family became friends with the Nelson family. They were probably America’s most well-known clan because they all appeared weekly on TV’s The Adventures of Ozzie and Harriet. Nelson was a big fan of the entire family, but then she focused her attention on one important member.
w:American Broadcasting Company and Stage Five Productions, Wikimedia Commons
3. She Loved Ricky Best
One standout member of the Nelson family was Ricky Nelson. In addition to being on The Adventures of Ozzie and Harriet, Ricky had a solid singing career as well. Nelson and Ricky started dating, and this thrilled both families. But Nelson had more going on than just a crush on a pop star.
Decca Records, Wikimedia Commons
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4. A Tragedy Moved Her
At this time, Nelson was honing her skill as a painter. In 1963, the sudden loss of President Kennedy inspired her to paint “When the Kennedys Were in the White House”. This painting depicts the Kennedy family before the tragic loss of John F Kennedy. Jacqueline Kennedy eventually bought this piece of art.
Nelson’s career as an artist was just beginning, and so was her life as an adult.
5. She Married Young
While dating Ricky, Kristin got pregnant. This was a big deal, as a pregnant teen did not fit in with the Nelson family's wholesome reputation. With few other options, Nelson—who was just 17 at this time—and Ricky reluctantly decided to tie the knot. Ricky later called it a “shotgun wedding”.
This was not a great way to start a marriage.
CBS Television, Wikimedia Commons
6. She Joined The Show
Quite likely, the Nelsons were unhappy with the fact that Kristin entered her marriage already pregnant. But that didn't stop them from welcoming her on their TV show. The writers simply wrote Nelson into the show as Ricky’s wife. From the outside, this looked like the perfect marriage.
But there was something going on that was much less than perfect.
Los Angeles Times, Wikimedia Commons
7. She Played Herself
Ricky Nelson was growing up, and his father had an idea. He wanted to cash in on his son’s ascension into adulthood, and he planned to do it in a film. He secured the rights to a play called Love and Kisses, about a young man marrying his high school sweetheart and trying to free himself from his parents. Ricky would play the lead and Kristin the girlfriend.
It sounded a lot like his real life.
8. It Followed True Life
Ozzie Nelson was both the director and screenwriter of Love and Kisses. Strangely, it followed Nelson's real-life story pretty closely. When the lead character announced he is going to marry his high school sweetheart, everyone assumed she was pregnant. Of course, in real life Nelson really was.
Sadly, a pre-marriage pregnancy was not the worst of her problems.
9. She Grew Up Too Fast
For the publicity of Love and Kisses, Ricky Nelson became Rick Nelson. They were trying to get audiences used to a grown-up version of the young star. Behind the scenes, Kristin and Ricky were growing up all too fast. Kristin Nelson later said that “we did what everyone else was doing all those years”. Which sounds like a subtle way of saying that there was substance use in the Nelson household.
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10. She Joined In
When Kristin Nelson saw that her new husband was into an edgy lifestyle, she tried to join in. She went on the road with Ricky and participated in anything he would throw her way. After a while, she realized something. They were both “messed up”. But they were not too messed up to do what most young American couples do.
Foldare and Associates-Hollywood (publicity agency), Wikimedia Commons
11. Their Family Grew
In 1967, Kristin Nelson gave birth to twin boys, who they named Gunnar and Matthew. At this time, Ricky was focusing more of his attention on his hobbies—doing karate and collecting sports cars—and less time on his family. You’d think that with a preoccupied husband and three kids, Nelson would have her hands full.
Nope, she still found time to work.
12. She Made A Film
While dealing with her dysfunctional marriage, Kristin Nelson still found time for her career. In 1967, she appeared in the western comedy What Am I Bid? with Leroy Van Dyke. It was almost like Nelson was cheating, as her co-star, like her husband, was a singer/actor.
Her next film would also star an opponent of her husband’s.
13. She Got Close To Oscar
In 1970, Nelson made a short film called The Resurrection of Broncho Billy, which had singer/actor Johnny Crawford as the lead. Strangely enough the movie’s writer was future horror legend John Carpenter. In this film, Nelson plays an artist, and it was quite a success. The film went on to win the Best Short Subject award at the 1971 Academy Awards.
She also found time to appear with her husband.
Screenshot from The Resurrection of Broncho Billy, Universal Pictures (1970)
14. They Worked Together
In the Over-the-Hill Gang, Kristin Nelson and Ricky continued the idea that their marriage was not just personal but also professional. Audiences were becoming more and more accustomed to seeing Nelson and Ricky on screen as a couple. But their idyllic on-screen life was nothing like the terrible truth back at home.
Screenshot from The Over-the-Hill Gang, ABC (1969)
15. She Just Said No
Nelson got it into her head that music was the root of her marriage problems. She was sure that Ricky should pursue acting instead, which led to arguments about his constant touring. At one point, Nelson was so against Ricky’s music career that she refused to allow him to even bring his guitar into the house.
But music wasn't the only problem this couple had.
Michael Ochs Archives, Getty Images
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16. They Spent A Lot
Both Kristin Nelson and Ricky had grown up in wealthy families. So, as a young couple, they had little idea about how to manage money. At this time, neither of them were earning very much money, yet they continued living an extravagant lifestyle with expensive vacations and costly home renovations.
Clearly, this marriage needed some professional help.
Mary Mead Maddick of Topix [1], Wikimedia Commons
17. She Reached Out For Help
Nelson decided that therapy might help solve her problems with Ricky. She found a therapist, and Ricky joined her for some sessions. But then he stopped attending, and the problems just got worse. Her next step was to go to his family. She needed their help to get her husband clean and sober.
Their reaction was not at all what she expected.
18. She Came Clean To The Family
When Kristin Nelson told her in-laws that their son had a substance problem, she got a strange response: They refused to believe that any such problem existed. Nelson soon realized she would have to face her husband’s problem alone.
Her first move ended in disaster.
Photographer not credited, Wikimedia Commons
19. She Moved Him Out
When Ricky was on one of his extended tours, Nelson took matters into her own hands. She packed up all of his stuff and moved him into a house that she had rented. A blindsided Ricky moved in, but he quickly found a clandestine use for the house. Nelson caught him there with two Los Angeles Raiders cheerleaders.
But this wasn’t the first time that Ricky had cheated.
ABC Television Uploaded by We hope at en.wikipedia, Wikimedia Commons
20. He Was A Cheater
Legend has it that Ricky used his time on the road to have affairs. He was a pop star after all, and women likely threw themselves at him. His own estimation was that he had bedded more than 1000 women. While Nelson couldn’t compete with that number, she had her own debauched past.
21. She Broke Him In
One story puts Nelson in Ronald Reagan’s bed. But she wasn’t with the future president; she was with his teenaged son. When Reagan found out, he was actually relieved. He had concerns that Ronald Regan Jr was gay, and this, in his eyes anyway, proved that he wasn’t. Nelson was 30 at the time, and it was Ronnie Reagan Jr’s first time in the sack.
Clearly, Nelson’s marriage was in serious trouble.
Bill Varie, Los Angeles Times, Wikimedia Commons
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22. She Sent Him A Wake Up Call
In 1977, Kristin Nelson could handle no more of her marriage, and she filed for divorce. Maybe this was a wake-up call for Ricky, as they ultimately decided to give their marriage and their family another chance. They bought a big house on Mulholland Drive and tried to make it work.
But Nelson had one very serious demand for her husband.
KMR Publications, Getty Images
23. She Blamed Music
To make their marriage work, Kristin Nelson wanted Ricky to quit his music career. She may have been thinking that music was at the root of all their problems. But Ricky refused to quit and continued to tour. Of course, when Ricky was home, there was tension in the house. By 1980, Nelson realized that nothing had changed.
Topix. Photographer not credited, Wikimedia Commons
24. They Couldn’t Settle
In 1980, Nelson returned to the courts to file for divorce. Early the next year, there was still no settlement. In February, the court decided on a temporary arrangement. Nelson got the kids and a monthly check of $3,600 from Ricky. Ricky also had to foot the bills for health, taxes and the kids' education.
It added up to a huge amount, and Ricky had a problem.
film studio, Wikimedia Commons
25. They Were Both Bad
Kristin Nelson didn't believe it, but Ricky said he had no money. She was sure he was hiding his assets, but had no proof as to where they were. Then both Nelson and Ricky started accusing the other of drinking too much and generally being a bad parent. It seemed like this was going to be the longest and dirtiest divorce in Hollywood history.
Living through it would be harder than Nelson could imagine.
Trailer screenshot, Wikimedia Commons
26. She Hit Rock Bottom
While waiting for a divorce, Nelson found living as a single mom of four agonizing. Making things worse was her own continued substance use and problems with drinking. Being short of cash, she had to get a job. The only thing she could find was a position as an assistant to a casting director for just $200 a week. This was a far cry from appearing on one of America’s most popular TV shows.
She needed this divorce finalized to get Ricky’s money.
27. She Got Left Out
In 1982, Nelson finally got her divorce. Sadly, the real winners were the lawyers and accountants. They scored over $1 million, and Ricky had to pay it all. Now, Ricky really was broke. He had to continue touring to keep up his payments for the kids.
And Nelson realized she still had to work to make ends meet.
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28. She Got A Bit Part
In 1982, Kristin Nelson appeared in another film about teen pregnancy. Liar’s Moon was an early film for future star Matt Dillon. This time around, Nelson wasn’t the cute teen who got in trouble but played the small part of an after hours adult companion. Clearly, she was scraping the bottom of the barrel for roles.
She’d need to because a devastating accident was about to leave her very much alone.
Screenshot from Liar’s Moon, Crown International Pictures (1981)
29. He Bought A Plane
Ricky hated using a bus for touring, but he also hated flying. With no other options, he bought a well-used second-hand plane. This 1944 DC-3 had seen better days—back when it belonged to Jerry Lee Lewis—but now it looked in pretty bad shape. Sadly, it was all Ricky could afford. He had to keep touring to keep up with his ever-increasing debts.
photographer:Maurice Seymour, Chicago, Wikimedia Commons
30. The Plane Went Down
The DC-3 had already caused Nelson various headaches. He’d missed the inaugural Farm Aid charity concert because of it. But what happened next was much worse than a headache. On New Year’s Eve, the plane carrying Ricky, his fiancée, and members of his band went down in a Texas cow pasture. Only the two pilots survived.
Nelson was now very much alone.
Lentz W (Sgt), No 9 Army Film & Photographic Unit, Wikimedia Commons
31. She Needed Money
Once Kristin Nelson dealt with her feelings about losing Ricky, she started thinking about money. After all, she had four children and someone had to feed them. Her fear was that Ricky’s life insurance would not go to her or the kids, so she got the idea to sue the Nelson family.
Ricky’s older brother, David Nelson, was administering the estate. Nelson made the decision to take him to court.
32. She Lost Her Cool
Ricky’s funeral was a tense affair. Everyone knew that Kristin Nelson had plans to try and get money from Ricky’s estate and few people were happy about it. An argument erupted between Nelson and her daughter, Tracy. It got so heated that Nelson ended up throwing her daughter to the ground and using her purse as a weapon.
Tensions were running high as Nelson’s case went before the judge.
33. The Kids Would Be All Right
It was a Los Angeles judge who listened to Nelson’s plea for money from Ricky’s estate. The judge rejected it. David Nelson knew who he wanted to protect. He made sure that there was money for all four of the children. But for Nelson herself, there was nothing.
Nelson would have been very much alone if it weren't for her siblings.
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34. She Had Famous Siblings
While Kristin Nelson was making her rise to fame, her siblings were on a similar track. Her younger sister, Kelly, had appeared in TV shows and had reached a strange height of her fame as the “Tic-Tac Girl”. Nelson’s younger brother, Mark Harmon, was also appearing on TV and had married Pam Dawber, from TV’s Mork & Mindy.
As Nelson’s life began its spiral downward, her siblings got involved.
Bill Wheatley from Los Angeles, CA, USA, Wikimedia Commons
35. She Couldn’t Raise The Kids
After the tragic plane crash, Kristin Nelson was on a downward spiral that left little time for parenting. Her youngest son Sam, lived with her parents, her sister Kelly and also with her brother Mark Harmon, who at this point was appearing on the hit show St Elsewhere.
Harmon watched in horror as his sister’s life began unraveling.
Angela George, Wikimedia Commons
36. She Lost Her Art
Since she was 17 years old, Nelson had been a painter. Back in 1967, she’d even had a one-woman show, and she’d sold her paintings for as much as $5,000. Celebrities like Mia Farrow and Jacqueline Kennedy had paid big bucks for her works of art. Harmon saw that in her horrid state, Nelson couldn’t bear to put a brush to canvas.
Harmon wanted to help his troubled sister.
20th Century Fox, Wikimedia Commons
37. She Had An Angel
Harmon could see that his sister really needed help. He had a solution, but wondered how she would react. His idea was for her to enter rehab. Kristin Nelson later said that no one else could have convinced her to do it. It seemed that Harmon was like a guardian angel to Nelson.
But Harmon could not be totally trusted.
38. She Faced A Lawsuit
Nelson emerged from rehab and right into a lawsuit. To Nelson’s horror, Harmon was now petitioning to get custody of her son, Sam. Apparently, Sam had told his therapist that it was scary to be around his mom. This had made Harmon leap into action. He wanted to keep Sam safe, and that meant keeping him away from Nelson.
Michael Ochs Archives, Getty Images
39. She Went To Court
Still feeling raw from her stint in rehab, Nelson had to go to court to keep custody of her son. There was a hearing in July 1987, and Sam’s therapist took the stand. Apparently, Sam had drawn a picture of his mother as a dragon. Harmon’s wife, Pam Dawber, spoke up and said that Sam was afraid to go home because Nelson called him names and raised her voice at him.
The judge took it all in and made a decision.
Angela George, Wikimedia Commons
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40. She Lost Him
The judge made a decision, and just like that, Nelson had lost custody of 12-year-old Sam. Worse still, Nelson had to stay 180 m (200 yds) away from her brother’s house. The man who Nelson had seen as a guardian angel had turned into a devil. She was going to have to fight against the picture-perfect life that Mark Harmon and Pam Dawber offered Sam.
It was going to be a battle royale.
Jerry Avenaim, Wikimedia Commons
41. They Fought Like Cats And Dogs
In August 1987, the trial for custody of Sam was in full swing, and neither party was holding back. Nelson came out fighting and accused Dawber of substance use when she was starring in Mork & Mindy. Harmon and Dawber came back with stories of Nelson’s own substance use and poor parenting.
It was turning into a blood bath, and there was no end in sight.
42. He Wanted It To Stop
Harmon saw the wretched damage this trial was doing, and he wanted to stop it. From out of nowhere, he decided to drop the case. Harmon agreed to only having visitation rights with Sam. But Nelson had to agree to attend therapy with her son and Harmon. Miraculously, Nelson was getting a second chance with her son.
While things were looking up in her life, Nelson made a huge life decision.
Screenshot from NCIS, CBS Media Ventures (2003-Present)
43. She Walked Down The Aisle
In 1988, Nelson gave marriage another try. This time it was Mark Tinker, the son of NBC executive Grant Tinker and TV icon Mary Tyler Moore. Tinker had a connection to Nelson's brother. He was the producer on St Elsewhere, a hospital drama Harmon had appeared on for three seasons. Sadly, their marriage lasted only until 2000.
Done with marriage, Nelson decided to relocate.
44. She Found Her Own Paradise
Nelson settled in beautiful Santa Fe, New Mexico. Here, she had time to spend with her children. Tracy Nelson had followed in her parents’ footsteps and appeared in many TV shows as a guest star and also as a regular on Square Pegs opposite Sarah Jessica Parker. She also studied ballet for 17 years.
Her brothers were also in show business.
Jim Accordino at https://www.flickr.com/photos/jimmyack205/, Wikimedia Commons
45. The Twins Make Music
Nelson’s twins, Matthew and Gunnar, had become musicians and formed the hard rock duo called Nelson. Unlike their father, the twins have maintained a healthy image free of scandal. Their most recent gig was on season 2 of the superhero TV series Peacemaker in 2025.
But we can’t forget the youngest sibling: Sam Nelson.
User:Megproc84, Wikimedia Commons
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46. He’s A Survivor
Nelson’s youngest child is Sam, and it was he who perhaps suffered the most in the family’s dramas. The tug-of-war between Nelson and her brother Mark Harmon certainly could have scarred young Sam for life. When he became an adult, Sam studied psychology and film at Boston College. Happily, Sam says he and Nelson are “absolutely close”.
Nelson seemed content to spend her final days in New Mexico. But her health was soon an issue.
47. She Had A Scare
Sometime around 2017, Tracy said that her mother had a health scare. It was so bad that Nelson ended up in a coma. Tracy remembers looking at her mother and seeing her clenched jaw. Still, she knew that she still had some fight left in her. She was right, Nelson recovered.
But she didn’t have long to live.
48. She Passed
On April 27, 2018, Nelson died of a heart attack at her home in Sante Fe. She was 72. To announce her passing, Tracy took to social media, publicly posting about her mother's demise on May 1, 2018. The weird thing was: no one seemed to notice.
49. She Posted About Her Loss
In her Facebook post, Tracy didn't hold back in her praise. She referred to her mom’s ability to party and called her a “cool person”. Afterward, Tracy likely expected the world to respond. But that’s not what happened.
Strangely enough, it was her brother who brought eyes to the post.
50. She Almost Got Missed
At the time of Nelson’s passing, her brother Harmon was appearing in CBS’s hit show NCIS. By chance, the show was having its season finale. Because of the excitement over the finale, the media stumbled upon Tracy’s Facebook post. If it hadn’t been for NCIS, who knows when the world would have noticed Nelson’s passing. Luckily, she had her kids in her life at the end.
Michael Ochs Archives, Getty Image
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Sources: 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19
