A Heart Full Of Love
Alexandra Feodorovna, also known as Charlotte of Prussia, was well-acquainted with tragedy. From the ruins of her childhood, she found the one thing that a woman of her social standing couldn’t count on: true love. However, that didn’t protect her. Life still dealt her blow after blow, until her frail body couldn’t take it any longer.
Still, through it all, love—for her husband, for her children, and her country—carried her forward, giving her strength, even when she had nothing else left to give.
1. Her Destiny Was Denied
Charlotte started her life as any royal would. As the eldest daughter of King Frederick William III of Prussia and his wife, Duchess Louise of Mecklenburg-Strelitz, one would think that Charlotte lived a blissful childhood, filled with pampering and luxury. This likely should have been her destiny.
Unfortunately, Charlotte had the misfortune of being born under the shadow of conflict, and it became a shadow she could never escape.
Heinrich Anton Dahling, Wikimedia Commons
2. She Grew Up During A Dark Time
Charlotte enjoyed roughly eight years of life at Charlottenburg Palace in her hometown of Berlin before her entire world burst into flames, and one man was to blame: Napoleon Bonaparte. Bonaparte ripped Europe into shreds, placing Charlotte’s beloved Prussia in the crossfire.
A stronger leader, perhaps, could have sheltered Charlotte during these turbulent times. Unfortunately, her father had never been that leader.
Jacques-Louis David, Wikimedia Commons
3. Her Father Failed Her
Frederick William III had many traits that made him a good father. Unfortunately, he proved to be a weak and ineffectual leader, letting his daughter down in the worst way as a result. Frederick’s poor leadership caused Berlin to fall, leaving the fate of their family to rest instead on his wife’s shoulders. Louise knew they had no choice but to run.
Franz Kruger, Wikimedia Commons
4. Her Family Had No Choice
Charlotte had been born to a life of luxury. What she found on the road, instead, was desperation. They fled in the dead of winter, sleeping in “one of the wretched barns they call houses” until they’d reached the eastern edges of their kingdom. Berlin had fallen. Charlotte and her family only had one hope for survival: Russia.
Friedrich Georg Weitsch, Wikimedia Commons
5. She Lost Her Kingdom
With Berlin lost and half of Prussia with it, Charlotte and her family depended on the mercy of a stronger leader: Tsar Alexander I of Russia. Thankfully, they found it. With Alexander’s protection, Charlotte settled in Memel, creating a new home with her family. Here, Charlotte grew from a child into a young woman.
However, the losses she’d suffered remained—her family never forgot the home they’d abandoned.
Manner of George Dawe, Wikimedia Commons
6. Her Home Was Destroyed
For better or worse, Berlin was Charlotte’s home, and eventually she found her way back there. As 1809 neared a close, France had been dealt with—and Charlotte, along with her family, could finally return home and put everything they’d been through behind them. Or could they? Charlottenburg Palace, the place of Charlotte’s birth, was not what it had once been. The French had left one last parting gift.
Carsten Steger, Wikimedia Commons
7. She Learned From Her Hardships
The French had plundered Charlotte’s beloved palace. The family returned to find all of their former splendor shattered, crumbling at their feet. Charlotte suffered 11 years of destruction. It was not the life that her parents had expected for her. Yet, it may have been the life that she’d been destined for.
From the fire, Charlotte emerged a better version of herself, not despite the hardships but because of them.
8. Her Life Changed Forever
Charlotte’s mother saw her challenges for what they were: growth opportunities. Louise believed that their early trials would teach her children resilience, that it would show them “luxury and prosperity” were not givens in anyone’s life. A lesson Louise played a key role in—just because Charlotte had returned home, did not mean life had finished testing her.
Wilhelm Ternite, Wikimedia Commons
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9. She Filled Big Shoes
Charlotte celebrated her 12th birthday in the home where she was born. Only days later, she mourned her mother in the same home. Louise succumbed to illness in July 1910, and suddenly Charlotte found herself in a position she’d never expected to be: the center of attention, a position that did not suit Charlotte.
Henriette Felicite Tassaert, Wikimedia Commons
10. She Wasn’t Ready For It
As the eldest daughter, Charlotte became the principal lady at court. However, Charlotte tended towards quiet pastimes, preferring privacy to public grandeur. It must have seemed to those at court that Charlotte had been pushed into a position that she’d not yet been ready for. She was only a small girl, and a small girl needed her mother.
Christina Robertson, Wikimedia Commons
11. Her Heart Waited For Her
It was Louise who’d seen the potential within Charlotte. To Louise, “My daughter Charlotte is reserved and concentrated, but like her father, her seemingly cold appearance conceals the beating of her hot, compassionate heart”. Without her mother, how was Charlotte to carry on? If only she knew that someone waited around the corner, destined to awaken her “hot, compassionate heart”.
Elisabeth Louise Vigee Le Brun, Wikimedia Commons
12. She Couldn’t Depend On Love
In the winter of 1814, Charlotte and her father welcomed two visitors to the palace: Grand Duke Nicholas Pavlovich and his younger brother. Charlotte, now 15, knew enough of the world to be aware that a love match couldn’t be part of her future. In Nicholas Pavlovich, Charlotte and her family found the perfect match—but could something more brew between the politics?
13. She Made A Good Match
Grand Duke Nicholas Pavlovich, while not in line for the throne, proved an excellent connection for Prussia’s ruling family. Through marriage, Charlotte could strengthen the bonds between the two nations. However, Nicholas Pavlovich was also a young man, not far off from Charlotte’s age. Even if Charlotte’s head knew what to expect, her heart could still dream.
Hermitage Museum, Wikimedia Commons
14. She Was Whisked Off Her Feet
What 17-year-old doesn’t want someone to whisk them off their feet? Charlotte may have been a princess. However, she was also just a girl, a girl who’d seen everything that she loved destroyed and been forced to build it back up again. When Nicholas returned to her the following year, Charlotte began to see another side to the man her family expected her to marry—a side she could get used to.
15. She Knew What To Value
Nicholas wooed Charlotte. Together they went to the opera and strolled through the countryside, lost in their own world. Despite all of the suffering they’d each experienced and expectations that rested on both their shoulders, Charlotte and Nicholas were two young adults. They fell in love. In Nicholas, Charlotte found not just a good match for her country, but a good match for her.
After Honourable Mercer Elphinston, Wikimedia Commons
16. She Gave Him Her Full Trust
By the time they announced their engagement, Charlotte felt no fear for her future. She understood Nicholas, and he understood her. Charlotte wrote, “What we have in common is our inner life; let the world do as it pleases, in our hearts we have a world of our own”. Nicholas was her equal in all the ways that mattered. However, he was still a prince of Russia, and that came with expectations, expectations Charlotte needed to follow.
Unknown authorUnknown author, Wikimedia Commons
17. She Gave Up Everything For A Man
Charlotte gave herself to Nicholas, writing, “With complete confidence and trust, I gave my life into the hands of my Nicholas, and he never once betrayed it”. However, she gave up everything to be with him, her home, her religion, and even her name. Converting to Russian Orthodox, Charlotte of Prussia became “Alexandra Feodorovna”. Alexandra may have trusted Nicholas. Yet his family proved another matter entirely.
Alexander Brullov, Wikimedia Commons
18. She Struggled With Her In-Laws
Everyone knows that the first rule of marrying into a family is simple: make sure that your mother-in-law likes you. Even Alexandra knew this to be true. Her mother-in-law, Maria Feodorovna, posed no problem for Alexandra, becoming fond of her. Unfortunately, Alexandra had another problem: her sister-in-law.
Élisabeth Louise Vigée Le Brun, Wikimedia Commons
19. She Became A Plaything
In marrying into the Russian court, Alexandra Feodorovna had to contend with her sister-in-law, Empress Elizabeth Alexeievna. Once a young foreign princess lost in the Russian court, Elizabeth Alexeievna could have chosen kindness, sympathizing with Alexandra. Too bad Elizabeth Alexeievna decided to turn Alexandra into her newest plaything instead.
Elisabeth Louise Vigee Le Brun, Wikimedia Commons
20. She Was Weak, Pale, And Interesting
According to Alexandra, “I was very weak, very pale and (they claimed) very interesting-looking”. These were all things that the court, particularly Elizabeth Alexeievna, picked upon. However, Alexandra eventually got the upper hand in their relationship. She quickly proved that she could do the one thing that Elizabeth Alexeievna couldn’t, making Alexandra essential to Russia while Elizabeth Alexeievna became forgotten.
Jean-Laurent Mosnier, Wikimedia Commons
21. She Carried On The Line
The love that Alexandra Feodorovna and Nicholas had for each other proved fruitful for the continuation of their dynasty. By the age of 22, she’d already birthed two children, a son and a daughter, and was carrying her third. Alexandra had set herself up to be the perfect royal wife. Unfortunately, life hadn’t finished with her just yet. Her third pregnancy ended in heartbreak.
George Dawe, Wikimedia Commons
22. She Couldn’t Hold On
Alexandra Feodorovna lost her baby. Their third daughter entered the world having already departed it: a stillbirth. Only 22, trapped in a court that had never been friendly to her, Alexandra became undone by this loss. Fearing for her health, Nicholas whisked her away, back to the safety of Prussia. However, the needs of Russia never stayed far, eventually calling them back.
Alexander Brullov, Wikimedia Commons
23. She Produced What They Needed
In a monarchy, only one thing matters: heirs. Alexandra made an advantageous marriage by marrying Nicholas. However, at the time of their union, no one suspected that Nicholas would ever succeed his brother, Alexander. Nicholas had 10 siblings, and another brother, Constantine, existed between Alexander and Nicholas, who’d inherit if Alexander had no children. Alexandra changed all of that.
Vladimir Borovikovsky, Wikimedia Commons
24. She Gave Russia Hope
Alexandra Feodorovna gave Russia an opportunity it desperately needed—she gave them hope, through her children. By the birth of her second child, her brother-in-law, Alexander, was already in his 40s, and none of his children had survived. Still, Constantine, not Nicholas, would inherit. Or would he? Every family has their secrets, and Alexander was about to tell Alexandra one.
Unidentified painter, Wikimedia Commons
25. Her In-Laws Failed
There are a lot of expectations upon a royal to marry well. Your marriage could make or break your entire standing within the world. Alexander married well, though it did not work out for him. Nicholas and Alexandra married extremely well, blessing them with good social standing and marital bliss. The third brother, Constantine, was another story entirely, and that story changed Alexandra’s life forever.
19th century author, Wikimedia Commons
26. She Didn’t Know What Was Coming
Unlike Alexandra and Nicholas, Nicholas’s brothers were not happy in love. Alexander remained in his unhappy marriage. Constantine, however, behaved so abhorrently that his first wife left him. If that had been the end of things, Alexandra may have continued with the simple existence that she’d always known. Unfortunately, Constantine was determined to try again.
Thomas Lawrence, Wikimedia Commons
27. Her Brother-In-Law Changed Everything
Constantine refused to admit defeat. He would find love again, no matter the consequences. After a long separation, Constantine’s first marriage became officially annulled, and he immediately married again to Polish Countess Joanna Grudzinska. As a result of this marriage, Constantine made a decision that sent shockwaves throughout all of Russia—and no one knew about them.
28. She Knew A Secret
Relations between Russia and Poland were tense; this likely contributed to Constantine making an agreement with his brother upon his marriage: He’d abdicate the throne if offered it, and none of his heirs through Joanna had any right to rule. Suddenly, Alexandra’s family became next in line for the throne. Unfortunately, no one but Constantine, Alexander, and maybe Alexandra and Nicholas knew this.
George Dawe, Wikimedia Commons
29. Her Life Changed In A Moment
Alexandra’s life changed in a single moment, and she had no control over it. She possibly had some warning, as some sources suggest that Alexander informed her and Nicholas that he intended to abdicate the throne, at which point, he intended to give the title to Nicholas. However, when he told them this, it seemed like a far-off possibility. Alexander surely had plenty of life left to live before he handed over the crown—didn’t he?
Alexander Molinari, Wikimedia Commons
30. She Didn’t Realize The End Had Come
Alexander was not well. His mind began to deteriorate, leading to him becoming withdrawn and suspicious. His wife suffered too. When he left for the South of Russia, it was for Elizabeth Alexeievna’s health, not his. However, Alexander never returned from that voyage, succumbing to illness, and nobody knew about it.
AnonymousUnknown author, Wikimedia Commons
31. She Enjoyed Her Final Days
Due to the vast size of Russia and possibly some confusion over protocol, no one in the palace knew of Alexander’s fate until December—many weeks later. Alexandra and Nicholas couldn’t possibly prepare for the mayhem that promptly followed. The loss of Alexander upended their lives, taking all of Russia along with it.
AnonymousUnknown author, Wikimedia Commons
32. She Feared For Her Family
Who knew about Constantine’s abdication? Constantine, certainly. Alexandra Feodorovna and Nicholas, maybe. Alexander, undoubtedly, but he took that information to the grave. The Russian government and public had no idea that Constantine wouldn’t be their next tsar. As a result, Alexandra found herself fearing for her own life and that of her family.
Emanuel Thelning, Wikimedia Commons
33. Her Husband Was The Villain
See, the problem came when a small but significant portion of the Russian military swore an oath of loyalty to Constantine, not Nicholas, thinking that he’d be their next tsar. When they discovered Nicholas would be their next tsar, confusion spread throughout Russia, and one group pounced upon the opportunity to destroy everything, targeting Nicholas and his family as the villains.
Franz Kruger, Wikimedia Commons
34. Her Family Was Everything
Alexandra Feodorovna didn’t care for politics. She was a mother. That was her life. Now, thanks to her in-laws, she found herself right back where she started. Yet again, Alexandra faced the threat of revolution, as angry men called for the demise of her husband and family. She could live without the crown, but she couldn’t live without her family.
Workshop of George Dawe, Wikimedia Commons
35. Her Husband Faced Danger
The crushing fear consumed Alexandra Feodorovna. She couldn’t let it go. Eventually, it began to manifest physically as she developed facial tics. Only a few months ago, her family was safe. Now, everything hinged upon Nicholas’s loyalty-swearing ceremony on December 26. If he could make it through that, their future was secure, but that was easier said than done.
Unknown authorUnknown author, Wikimedia Commons
36. She Didn’t Know What Happened
Nicholas arrived at his loyalty-swearing ceremony, held in a public square, prepared to defend his new position. As he stood, rebels filled the square, determined to remove Nicholas from the throne one way or another. A standoff ensued, each side squared off against the other, unwilling to be swayed from their position. It seemed that, perhaps, the matter could be handled peacefully—until a shot rang out.
Bogdan Willewalde, Wikimedia Commons
37. She Waited For News
One can only imagine the relief Alexandra felt when Nicholas returned to her, safe and sound. After the loss of a man on Nicholas’s side, Nicholas ordered fire against the rebels, handling the revolt swiftly. While no ruler ever reigns without some whispers of dissent, Nicholas ended this matter. Alexandra and Nicholas ruled peacefully, and power never changed one important thing: They loved each other, more than anything.
38. She Was A Mother
Alexandra Feodorovna cared little for politics. She may have become an empress. However, at her heart, she was a mother and a wife first. By 1832, she’d birthed seven children, and raising them proved her pride and joy. Nicholas, too, felt great passion for his family. During tragedy, as their home at the Winter Palace burned, Nicholas supposedly cared for only one thing.
Florstein (Telegram:WikiPhoto.Space), Wikimedia Commons
39. Her Husband Valued Her
In 1837, fire swept through the Winter Palace, destroying much of it. Supposedly, Nicholas only had one request: “Let everything else burn up, only just save for me the small case of letters in my study which my wife wrote to me when she was my betrothed”. The sources show Nicholas as a doting and loving husband. So, why then, did he need a mistress?
Unknown authorUnknown author, Wikimedia Commons
40. She Couldn’t Be “Intimate”
Alexandra Feodorovna suffered from poor health her entire life. One of the few words that constantly appears in descriptions of her is “frail”. By 1842, Alexandra was 44. She endured eight pregnancies since she was 20, and a stillbirth. Her already fragile health had now deteriorated further, with reports of "recurring heart attacks". Calling for the doctors, Nicholas got the one prognosis he couldn’t seem to bear, at least not without the support of another woman.
Unknown authorUnknown author, Wikimedia Commons
41. Her Husband Couldn’t Abstain
The story goes that due to her failing health, the doctors informed Alexandra and Nicholas that “intimate relations” were a no-go. Alexandra could not survive another pregnancy, and in a time before birth control, abstinence proved the only way to ensure that Alexandra remained safe. Some sources insist that Varvara Nelidova came into the picture at this point. If Nicholas couldn’t sleep with his wife, then he’d have another woman, or so they say.
George Dawe, Wikimedia Commons
42. Her Husband Turned To Others
Few know much about Varvara Nelidova. Nicholas proved more discreet than other nobles, and as such, historians are not certain what information is fact and what information was speculation. They are certain that Varvara became Nicholas’s mistress in 1832 and remained so for the remainder of his life. However, the fable that Nicholas remained loyal to his wife until she could no longer provide him with what he needed remains just that: a fable.
Franz Kruger, Wikimedia Commons
43. She Put On A Brave Face
Despite their supposed love, historians found records of Nicholas having three illegitimate children before taking up with Varvara, indicating that Nicholas had been with other women before. So, where did that leave Alexandra Feodorovna? Was her marriage as happy as it had seemed? Or had Alexandra merely been putting on a brave face for the public, and that’s all that remains now?
Wilhelm August Golicke, Wikimedia Commons
44. She Had A Complex Relationship
Love is complex. Physicality is just one aspect of any relationship. While Nicholas may have turned to other women during their marriage for physical comfort, only Alexandra gave what his soul needed. To Nicholas, “Happiness, joy, and repose – that is what I seek and find in my old Mouffy”. Another woman could provide the physical—no one could replace his “Mouffy”. Time, however, tried to take her from him.
Georg von Bothmann, Wikimedia Commons
45. She Suffered Often
Time was not kind to Alexandra Feodorovna. Her poor health wore her down, making her look older than her years. Soon, she could not remain in St. Petersburg. Alexandra set her eyes on Crimea, where Nicholas spared no penny in building her the Palace of Oreanda; however, Alexandra had never had good luck. Conflict yet again entered her life, forcing her to change her plans.
Franz Xaver Winterhalter, Wikimedia Commons
46. She Needed To Leave
Conflict in Crimea stopped Alexandra from visiting her palace. Instead, the doctors encouraged her to leave Russia entirely, insisting she head to Italy for her health. Upon hearing he’d have to part with his wife for months, Nicholas cried, begging the doctors, “Leave me my wife”. However, Alexandra needed to go—and there was another woman that Nicholas couldn’t part with.
Unknown authorUnknown author, Wikimedia Commons
47. She Dealt With The Mistress
In the end, Alexandra and Nicholas could not avoid parting. Alexandra went to Palermo, Italy, and Nicholas visited. However, he brought a friend with him. Varvara joined Nicholas on the trip. Alexandra may have accepted her husband’s mistress, but she wasn’t immune to jealousy. However, Alexandra’s health put things in perspective. Who can waste their time on jealousy when they are constantly at death’s door?
Alexey Bogolyubov, Wikimedia Commons
48. Her Fate Was Twisted
The end seemed inevitable for Alexandra. Her health continued to deteriorate, and her family surely prepared for the worst. In 1854, she became so ill that they believed this to be the moment. However, life has a sick sense of humor sometimes. Not only did Alexandra recover, but Nicholas became ill and passed a year later. Left on her own for the first time since her marriage forty years earlier, Alexandra took refuge in the most unexpected of people.
attributed to Franz Kruger, Wikimedia Commons
49. She Forgave
Alexandra kept Varvara Nelidova close to her side, appointing her as her personal reader once Nicholas was gone. However, Alexandra’s health continued to deteriorate rapidly. She could no longer stand the long, harsh Russian winters, forcing her to spend more and more time in warmer locations such as France and Italy. Alexandra hated her weakness.
Carl Timoleon von Neff, Wikimedia Commons
50. She Loved Her Country And Her Family
Alexandra wrote, “I am homesick for my country, and I reproached myself for costing so much money at a time when Russia needs every ruble”. However, her health demanded it. Alexandra survived her husband by five years before her fight finally left her. Knowing the end was near, Alexandra refused to travel, wishing to end her life in Russia. She passed in her sleep on November 1, 1860.
Her last words, reportedly, were “Niki, I am coming to you”. Love guided Alexandra, right to the very end.
Pierre Ferret (1815-75), Wikimedia Commons
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