Everyone wants to find “the one”—who doesn’t dream of finding true love?
Unfortunately, merely wanting something doesn’t make it so—as many people have learned the hard way. Time and time again, hopeful lovebirds put everything they’ve got into a relationship only for it not to work out. At the same time, there are some unlucky people who find out that it isn’t working in, shall we say, less than ideal ways.
Here are 20 stories people shared about the crazy moments that got them to realize their partner was not “the one”.
33. Getting Your Priorities in Order
He had a kid that lived in another state that he only saw a few times a year.
On 4/20 one year, he decided to stay for our city’s 4/20 festival instead of going home for his child’s birthday. Quote—”Little Man will understand. It’s 2 Chainz.”
Didn’t stay with him much longer after that.
If he doesn’t take care of his son…
32. Sometimes, You Really Are Better Off Alone
When he left. I was in an abusive relationship and didn’t know it, my mom supported him. He plays the victim to everyone now saying I was abusive. He would pour drinks on my head when I made him mad or he would slap me, along with more.
31. That Pretty Much Settles It
When she’s like, “Sooooo…. turns out I like girls instead.” Well, no need to drag that one out any longer.
30. Lacking Some Empathy
When my best friend passed away, 2 days later I decided to finally step outside the house. Went to spend time with my girlfriend and a friend. When her and I were alone, she turns around in the car and says these exact words: “You shouldn’t be sad, you’re out with us right now. You’re bringing the mood down.” That night I decided to end things. She then played the victim card and pretends nothing happened between us. This was just last summer. I’m a lot happier now.
29. Only One of Us Here Matters, Clearly
When I told him I had just found out my mom was leaving my dad for someone else, and he started complaining about his day at work.
28. Lies, Lies, and More Lies
When she told me she needed a few weeks to herself to “figure things out.” What she was actually doing was planning her wedding to a guy she met at work.
27. A Sign of Things to Come
When I overheard her conversation with her coworker wherein they were talking about her co-worker’s desire for children while her husband wanted to wait. My ex gave the advice, “If I were in your shoes, I’d just stop taking my birth control and not tell him.” I got the hell out of dodge fast!
26. The Truth Doesn’t Come Out
When we were having the “Should we stay together and work it out or go our separate ways?” discussion and he said he didn’t want me to go. I asked him why.
His answer was a full minute of silence staring at the table, completely at a loss for what to say. He couldn’t come up with any reason why he wanted me to stay.
That silence said more than a million words ever could.
25. Truly Insensitive
When she made jokes about me “faking” my depression. My dad has severe depression (he gets help and takes meds for it) and his brother had it until he killed himself.
24. Running Late
He didn’t turn up to my brother’s deathbed when he said he would. His exact words were ‘I’ll get a shower and be there soon.” He then ignored my phone calls for hours and didn’t show up. He didn’t go to his wake or funeral, the very least he could have done. This was after eight years together and now even the worst day of my family’s life has been tainted in my head by a selfish pig of a man.
23. Can’t Get Much Worse
When he made fun of me for a failed suicide attempt to the girl he had a “love child” with—during our marriage—after 10 years of being gaslighted and abused. There’s more, but I really don’t care to relive any of it. I recently got remarried to my best friend.
22. That’s Never a Good Sign…
When she came home from work one day and the first thing that popped into my mind was “Well, there went my day.” Just a normal day, no fight the night before, no stress, just my subconscious finally making himself heard.
21. Taking Some Initiative
The biggest moment I remember is the night of my sorority initiation ceremony. I didn’t have my phone for a few hours and in response to him not being able to get a hold of me he went and got two sleeve tattoos. They were done in his friend’s basement and they looked like it too.
20. Taking Things to the Next Level
When my mom called me and said that I needed to come to the house (30 minutes away) because she didn’t know how much longer my grandfather was going to make it. She insisted that I let my girlfriend at the time drive me because she didn’t want me driving upset, as I was very close with my pawpaw. Girlfriend agreed… I threw on some shoes and was ready to go. Girlfriend proceeded to get in the shower. And then blow dry and straighten her hair. And then do her makeup.
My mother called when we were 15 minutes away and told me that he’d passed. Had we left when we were supposed to, I would’ve gotten to say goodbye.
19. Breaking the Golden Rule
When I stopped by her house on the way to work to drop off flowers on her doorstep as a surprise and saw my “friend’s” car parked out front. This was at 5 in the morning. My “friend” was married with a pregnant wife at the time.
18. Bad Doggy, Good Doggy?
My dog attacked someone, I was told it was her daughters friend when I wasn’t home and I had to put him down for being vicious. Come to find out he attacked the dude she was cheating on me with…
17. A Long Holiday
She was messing around behind my back, then went for a week-long holiday with “girlfriends” and didn’t come home once she got back to our city. Four years down thedrain, and I was blindsided. I ended up with severe depression and dropping out of university.
Jokes on her, I ride a motorcycle now.
16. A Reason to Be Steaming Mad
Not me but my best friend. She was in a long distance relationship for a few years. They played a lot of PC games together. At one point, she gave him her card info so he could buy himself a game on Christmas, on the condition that he would delete the card info after.
He did not delete the payment info, and his computer got hacked. She got a few large charges and reported it to her bank. Then she noticed smaller charges on her bank statement here and there from the past few months, all from Steam. Her boyfriend assured her it wasn’t him, so she reported those charges as well.
What do you know—all of a sudden he got a vac ban from Steam for fraudulent charges. He starts claiming she had given him her card info again for a different purchase, and that she just forgot. He really wants the vac ban lifted because he plays a lot of Dota, and can’t play multiplayer with the vac ban.
And it gets worse. A few days later, her grandfather gets very sick very quickly. They were close, so she’s obviously devastated. She went to visit him in the hospital, and mid-conversation, he had a massive stroke. She and her family were basically shoved out of the room so the doctors could work. A doctor tells them he may be brain dead, but they have to wait and see.
My friend is distraught and calls her boyfriend while waiting. She explains what happens. This jerk says, “That really sucks. Also can you make sure to call your bank so we can get that vac ban lifted?”
She hung up on him and didn’t speak to him again for a year.
15. Money is No Object
One of my exes was a stickler about money to the point it felt petty. Every time we went out to eat, even after dating for two years, he would flag down the waiter and say, “We need the check split in half. Evenly.” If we would spend $5 at the grocery store buying spaghetti and sauce, he would ask me to pay half.
Anyway, my 17-year-old cat was dying, and I was heartbroken. The day I said goodbye to her, my ex—then boyfriend—took me out for ice cream. We shared a $5 sundae at Dairy Queen. He paid! I was so happy and touched by the small gesture during the worst day of my life.
But then in the car afterward, he asked me if we should “settle up now or… because, I mean… the sundae was $4.95 and I don’t think you gave me any money for it,” and I lost it. I threw a $20 at him and cried.
Listen, I don’t expect men to foot the bill all the time, and I definitely like to be fair, but buying your long-term girlfriend a $5 sundae when she’s absolutely distraught is not unreasonable.
This was 8 years ago, and I’m since engaged to a wonderful and generous man! We share money wonderfully and I think I’m even more appreciative of him because of this particular ex.
14. A Less Than Perfect Union
I would sit in my truck at the convenience store up the street, at first just to run in and grab a Coke, eventually, I was there for hours just stressing about the nightmare I was going home to.
13. ‘Nuff Said
I stopped drinking and realized how effed up everything really was in the relationship. Sometimes it takes a clear mind to see the truth.
12. That’s Rough
We’d been “together” for a year and she still freaked out whenever I mentioned the future. Also, correcting her parents every time they called me her “boyfriend”.
11. That’s So Frat
She went to a party, I was informed I was not allowed to go with her, and at said party were a bunch of Fratbros who would be instrumental in approving her being able to join the Sorority she wanted to join…
She came home looking as if she had freshly showered, and when I asked her why she looked that way??? “I was hit with a water balloon…”
Aparently a huge water balloon that didnt get your clothes wet and also left oddly colored stains near the neckline of your shirt…
10. Bad Performance
I know this may sound selfish, but he was “performing” on me, and I was giving him a road map. He then looked up at me and said, “You’re not making this much fun for me”. It was like a switch flipped. Every little annoying habit he ever had, and things that I didn’t like about him came crashing down on him at that instant.
9. Probably Too Much Love
She got super jealous because she heard women’s voices in the background (I was walking around my college campus) and demanded that I go up and kick/slap one of them so that they would never be interested in me.
When he said if a zombie apocalypse happened he’d let himself become a zombie… I don’t know why but something about just giving up made me realize he was a nope.
7. Yea, That’s Not Ideal
When I was with them and would just be thinking about how ready I was to go home, get comfortable and just be by myself
6. So Charming
He would go to McDonalds and get supper. He would sit in his grandpa chair in the living room and eat. When he was done he would brush the fry salt off of his greasy hands off into the floor. When I asked wtf he was doing he said, well you’re just going to vacuum anyway right?
5. The Worst Kind of Office Romance
When I realized that he had straight up started a relationship with a much younger girl at work. And everyone he worked with thought we were just friends and roommates. We had been married for several years at that point.
4. What a Snoop
When she started reading all my texts and Fb messages. (I keep my phone unlocked at home) She kept hers hidden all the time. I knew what was up.
3. The Big Realization
Everything just stopped and became more and more annoying. Instead of finding her laugh adorable, I couldn’t stand her hyena-like cackle. Instead of finding her innocence to the world cute, I started to realize that she was as smart as my hairy-ass big toe. Instead of wanting to spend every minute of the day talking to her, I began to detest the moments when that diarrhea would ooze from her mouth.
Instead of loving every aspect about how she looked, I only wanted to have sex….. to just have sez. Gone were the feelings of wanting HER to enjoy herself as well.
So yeah, that’s when I knew.
2. Lazy Never Wins
When she decided to be the most laziest and selfish person I’ve ever met.
There are plenty of other examples, but one specific instance that REALLY stood out was when I found a job that started at 6 AM, but I had a hard time falling asleep and only slept 4 hours to wake up at 3 AM. I also had some unavoidable important errands to do after work, so I was out of the house from 4AM to about 10PM and was up for 18 hours, and had to be up at 3 AM again… Then she starts complaining about how boring her day was since there was no work and she did nothing, and how tired she was… While I worked my ass off, went to 5-6 places, and almost got into an accident falling asleep at the wheel coming home (and even recounted it… Anybody with the slightest sense of shame would feel guilty about comparing their day, and the most sensible GF would cook ME dinner since all I had was a protein bar to stave off hunger… But not her), and the fact the house was still pretty warm in our lovely LA summers was the only thing preventing me from falling asleep fully dressed, otherwise I don’t care if I’m falling asleep in business wear.
While I was changing, she had the nerve to ask me to cook her dinner, which she eventually settled on Cup of Noodles (thank God), and spent more energy pestering me to make it for her than it took for her to potentially get her dead ass off the bed and make it her self.
Then, I had a nightmare where I dreamed that I married her and had a baby, but I’m having to drive my newborn son to work, do all the cooking and cleaning, clean his diapers, while she lays in bed and balloons to 300 lbs, then I eventually die from exhaustion and the only way she attended my funeral was by Skype.
1. Was That Really Appropriate?
I was living on the West Coast and her birthday was coming up the next weekend. The call came on Wednesday that Grandma was in the hospital and had 24 to 72 hours to live at best. I immediately called work and let them know I will be out Thursday and Friday and maybe some days next week. Bought a one-way plane ticket and called my girlfriend who seemed understanding.
I get back to the Midwest and got to the hospital in time to see my grandma, she died that night. I was asked to write the eulogy. Checked in with my girlfriend and she asked if our plans for her birthday were going to be affected. Erm, yes honey, the funeral isn’t until Monday. I’ll be back on Tuesday. She hung up on me.
She picked me up from the airport and didn’t even get out of the car to embrace me. The drive home felt like ice water was in my veins. I was so in love and was writing off the red flags.
Two weeks later, it was my birthday. I knew things were on the outs and was preparing to break up but she invited me out for my birthday dinner. I show up at our favorite place and wait 45 minutes at the bar for her to arrive. She texted me a picture of her and her girlfriends out at a concert asking how I liked being ditched on my birthday.
Tears streaming down my cheeks on the car ride home I calmly packed up her stuff, let myself into her place with my key and left her belongings on the floor along with the key on top and locked the door behind me on the way out. Blocked her number on my phone and social media. And changed the locks the next day at my place.
The next weekend I am watching TV and it’s late. She tries the door and I hear her key trying to work the lock. She’s sobbing outside my place, I just poured a stiff bourbon and turned up the volume on the TV until she left.
What a waste of a year. Looking back, I can’t imagine how I put up with her selfish antics that long, life is too short to deal with people like that.