January 10, 2019 | Samantha Henman

A Troll Came For Cardi B's Swimsuit Body, And Cardi Had The Perfect Response

It’s been quite a year for Cardi B—it’s like our girl can’t stay out of the news! As if dealing with some drama courtesy of her baby daddy/recent ex Offset wasn’t enough, now the trolls have been coming for her…

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It seems like every year, things get crazier and crazier for Cardi. In 2017 we got “Bodak Yellow” and her relationship/engagement to Offset, and in 2018, we got Invasion of Privacy and news that Cardi and Offset secretly got married!

But it didn’t stop there…

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Cardi also announced her pregnancy in 2018.

As a result, we spent the year getting blessed with THE MOST AMAZING maternity looks. Seriously, has anyone else since Beyonce worn pregnancy this well?

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Cardi topped her own iconic pregnancy looks by giving her daughter an even more iconic name when she was finally born in July. She and Offset named the baby girl Kulture Kiari and people were THERE for it.

As Cardi said on Twitter, “anything else woulda been basic.”

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Cardi showed loved for Offset by giving the baby girl the middle name Kiari—Offset’s real name is actually Kiari Kendrell Cephus.

But sadly, their baby bliss didn’t last for long.

Fans were absolutely shocked when Cardi had announced that she and Offset had broken up.

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Can you even imagine Cardi putting out a tastefully-worded press release about “conscious uncoupling” like other celebs when they break up? Hellll no.

In typical Cardi fashion, she announced the breakup on Instagram.

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Things did NOT calm down from there, however.

Even though Cardi was so sweet about Offset in her IG announcement, people speculated that the allegations of Offset cheating were what put the nail in the coffin for the relationship.

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As if that level of drama wasn’t enough, Offset tried to make a grand romantic gesture to get Cardi back in the middle of her performance at a festival in Cali.

He brought out a big floral arrangement that spelled out “Take me back, Cardi,” and apologized before basically getting dragged offstage.

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You know what they say—trolls gotta troll, and this huge gesture caused a bunch of them to come outta the woodwork and start talking.

Cardi’s always attracted a lot of attention online, but especially since that public apology, it seems like people on the internet can’t leave her alone, and it’s escalated from there.

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People were really out there on the internet talking about how the whole public apology was staged, making conspiracy theories about her publicist and such.

Cardi’s never been one to just let people run their mouths, and this was no exception.

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She went on IG Live and let it rip on the haters, defending her publicist from the accusations being thrown at her, saying “Y’all not gonna come for the people that I f*** with and I rock with, and I consider family. Period.”


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Basically, when it comes to Cardi, the lesson is: trolls step back. And that goes double when it comes to anyone who dares to talk about her body!

As if the romantic drama wasn’t enough, soon after Cardi gave birth, people began to talk…

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Thanks to Cardi’s penchant for defending herself, she’s come up with some epic (and very funny) clapbacks.

Like, when it was first rumored that Cardi was pregnant, she responded to a fan who asked about her bump by saying, “No b**** I’m just getting fat. Let me fat in peace.” Hilarious AND relatable.

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Am I the only one who thinks that Cardi should be a mommy blogger?

She’s been nothing but super real about her pregnancy, her post-baby body, and her life with Kulture Kiari, while still having that distinct Cardi flair.

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Her tweets about motherhood so far just prove it. She’s talked about the daily trials and tribulations of motherhood, tweeting “When parents say “if you wake the baby up YOU PUTTING HER BACK TO SLEEP????!” I feel that.”

Can you blame her?

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Probably her most relatable tweet about motherhood was the simplest—”I will forever hate changing diapers”

Everyone who has ever been near a dirty diaper could relate. But that tweet led her fans to do the math and think—how does even change diapers with her signature pointy mani?

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Cardi’s always been known for her absolutely insane nails.

They’ve been part of her look from the beginning, and they’re usually super long and shaped into a stiletto point by her manicurist, Jenny Bui. That’s not to mention the extra touches, like elaborate nail art that’s often bejeweled.

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You’d think after doing the math of “Changing diapers + pointy nails = ?” that fans would’ve been concerned for Kulture, but instead, they prayed for Cardi’s nails.

Priorities, people!

Either way, she explained that she’d abandoned her typical stiletto mani for a square tip for Kulture’s safety. Like I said, she’s the mommy blogger we need!

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A lot of attention has been paid to Cardi’s post-baby body. It’s crazy, but she managed to drop her baby weight within three months of giving birth—a truly amazing feat! Never one for modesty, she was quick to show off her impressive progress on Instagram.

But she’s also talked about the dark side of giving birth.

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When Cardi was on Jimmy Kimmel Live, she got really real about what it was like for her to give birth, straight up saying that Kulture “broke [her]” down there and that nobody told her she’d need stitches afterward.

Her issues with the toll that giving birth took on her body didn’t end there, though.

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After losing the baby weight, Cardi posted an IG showing off the body she’d worked so hard for, asking fans how to get rid of the black line on her stomach. The pregnancy line, or “linea nigra” if you’re fancy, is pretty common, and goes away a few months after giving birth.

Patience, Cardi!

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All complaints aside, Cardi has expressed how much she loves being a mother, and seems genuinely happy, despite the ongoing drama that’s popped up thanks to her recent break-up.

So who could blame her for posting an Insta showing off her bangin’ bod on the beach?

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Cardi’s been on tour in Australia and New Zealand and she had a chance to visit one of the famous black sand beaches down there. In the photo, her baby pink Gucci suit with black logo really offsets (pun intended) the black sand.

She captioned it “Live life little b****...Black sand beach ????.”

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Sadly, jealousy is a disease that affects millions of people yearly. Get well soon, haters.

But seriously though, the internet is a horrifying wasteland and few people have as many trolls as Cardi does. When she posted her beach photo, they came out swinging in the comments section.

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Right away, trolls came out of the woodwork (as they do) to leave disparaging comments about her body.

Honestly, how are these people gonna talk smack when she literally looks like she’s walking on water in the pic?

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For every compliment or heart emoji there was a comment about Cardi’s post-baby body—as if that’s really something people should still be doing in 2019.

And of course, because it’s the internet, there are people making rude remarks about her body AND accusing her of using Photoshop.

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But things really blew up when one megatroll IG user commented: “It looks like you have a d*ck.”

People piled on and echoed that sentiment, even though a. no it doesn’t 2. It’s nobody’s business what anybody’s privates look like!

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So for every “Ya body look good good” there was a “Wassup with the jock strap”—further proof the internet is trash.

But as we all know, our girl Cardi is not one to let this kind of stupidity go, and she clapped back in the most epic yet brutally honest way.

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Obviously, fans piled on this random troll, but Cardi shut it alllll down when she replied, saying “Nope I pushed a baby out of that however I do have a little fat pu***."

If you’d been paying attention, you probably could’ve heard thousands of people drop their phones at that exact moment.

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If there’s anything we’ve learned about Cardi over the years, it’s that she’s NOT the type to keep quiet.

While many celebs would probably refrain from engaging with trolls online, few of them have the same way with words that Cardi does—so who can blame her for standing up for herself?

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This wasn't even the first time since she gave birth that Cardi had to clap back when someone came for her.

After Cardi debuted her post-baby body and did some spon-con for a detox tea company, The Good Place actor Jameela Jamil called her out on it, saying she hopes that “all these celebrities all s*** their pants in public.” Jamil has famously claimed to fight for body positivity.

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On a screenshot of Jamil’s post, Cardi clapped back in a surprisingly gentle but predictably hilarious way, saying "I will never s*** my pants cause there's public bathrooms everywhere… oooo and bushes."

Shoutout to bushes!

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Jameela continued to call out other celebs while Cardi continued to live her own life after that.

I mean, all it takes is a quick Google of the phrase “Cardi B claps back” (more than 5 million results) to see she’s not one to be messed with.

People do NOT do their research, apparently.

People Reveal the Worst Secret Their Significant Other Thinks They Don’t Know Factsmirror

For all her time on Instagram defending herself, Cardi’s most famous feud is with Nicki Minaj—who could forget?

At New York Fashion Week in 2018, Cardi got in trouble for throwing one of her shoes at Nicki, and later claimed that Nicki had been liking comments on social media that claimed Cardi was a bad mother. Guess her inner mama bear came out with its claws!

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When someone’s been holding their own against Nicki Minaj, why do trolls even think it’s a good idea to go up against them?

After Cardi clapped back at the troll on her beach pic (and after getting piled on by her fans,) the troll wrote “Inactive” in their bio, but not before making a few other comments.

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First, they wrote that someone had put them and their comment on YouTube, and complained that they hadn’t given permission—hello! Welcome to the internet!

Finally, in the face of thousands of Cardi fans and one epic clapback from the queen herself, they apologized.

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The troll @-ed Cardi, saying “I’m sorry for what I said I didn’t mean to offend if I did.”

I personally am sorry this troll never learned how to use a comma, but an apology is an apology, I guess, no matter how terribly it’s expressed. I’d say lesson learned, but do trolls ever really learn?

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You know what they say: if you can’t take the heat, get out of the kitchen, and Cardi really turned up the heat with just one comment.

I’d like to say I hope that this makes the trolls out there really think before they comment, but I don’t have that much faith…

Sweating man

Considering the drama-filled year that Cardi’s had, one thing we can count on for the future is more scandal, more controversy, and likely? More social media takedowns.

Now that Cardi is a fierce and defensive mama bear to little Kulture, her claws are out, so watch out.

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With a fresh music video for “Money” and one of the most anticipated follow-up albums of all time set to come out later this year, Cardi isn’t going anywhere.

And with a spotlight on her like this, plus all her baby daddy drama, it’s only a matter of time before we see another social media drama bomb go off...here’s hoping she doesn’t hurt ‘em too bad when it does!

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