We could all use a little treat every once in a while. After all, self-care is very important—and we all deserve at least some enjoyment out of life. But what about when things go wrong? When the thing that was supposed to cheer us up ends up causing us even more problems? Here are real-life stories about times where people “treating themselves” ended up going horribly wrong.
1. I Scream For Ice Cream, Gone Wrong
I just passed my exams in university, so I decided to treat myself to some Ben & Jerry's ice cream. I woke up the next morning to a nightmare. I was covered in hives, vomiting, and burning up. Apparently, I had an unknown allergy that the ice cream decided to make me very much aware of. It was the worst week of my life. And that wasn't all...
The actual worst part was that the allergist didn't find anything common that I was allergic to in the ice cream, so we still don’t know what ingredients caused it and need to be avoided in the future. This was more than a decade ago, and I've never had issues with allergies ever since. It may well have been a fluke or something else. But I'll never know...
2. All You Can Regret
I recently treated myself to a night out for dinner at an all-you-can-eat sushi bar. I did the math on how much sushi I had to eat in order to save money from just buying the rolls individually. I did manage to successfully hit my goal, but at what cost? I was trying not to throw up for the whole drive home, and spent the rest of the day in bed clutching my stomach and rethinking my entire life.
3. Gaming The System
I once bought myself a PlayStation 3 video game system right when it came out, because I really wanted it and thought I deserved to have some fun. I very quickly realized that I could no longer pay for my basic living expenses after having used so much of my disposable income on something else. So within just a few weeks, I had to return the game system in order to pay my rent.
4. The Nail In The Coffin
I have postpartum depression. I thought that getting my nails done would make me feel better, even during a pandemic. I went to get my nails done and the person doing my nails said that her husband is in quarantine because he tested positive. Yeah, you read that right. She was exposed, yet she was still working and coming into contact with people.
She said this 30 minutes into the session. For two weeks, I was panicking, thinking that I had exposed my baby. It made my postpartum depression amplify.
5. Another Day Older And Deeper In Debt
I recently hit the age of 40 and went through a whole mid-life crisis. I started trying to find all kinds of crazy ways to treat myself, and basically tried to give myself a full makeover. It ended up backfiring in multiple ridiculous ways. At one point, I started dyeing my hair all kinds of fun colors. I did this all myself, at home, using box bleach and dyes that I ordered online.
And after many months of these kinds of things, I was no better off or happier than I was when I started. So all I did was throw a bunch of money away for no clear reason…
6. Don’t Get Fresh With Me
I've been unemployed for over a year now, and I hadn't bought anything nice for myself in months. While buying groceries one day, I saw some nice-looking pomegranates, and I decided I deserved a treat. I found the biggest one in the pile. It looked great, so I bought it. When I got home and cracked that sucker open that night, I immediately discovered that it was completely rotten inside.
Like to the point where no part of it was in any condition to be eaten. This was despite the fact that it showed no sign of having gone bad on the outside. This was so much worse than you might think. I actually cried when this happened, because I felt like I had squandered precious money when I shouldn't have and didn’t even have anything to show for it. I don’t even know how to explain the empty feeling I had over something so seemingly small.
7. Choked Up
I was feeling hungry one day after work and wanted to eat something that I would enjoy, so I stopped at a popular restaurant on the way home from work and bought myself a sandwich. And lo and behold, I nearly choked on it while I was halfway through eating it. That was not a very pleasant experience, to say the least! Talk about bad luck.
8. What Are You, Chicken?
I was insanely broke as a 22-year-old student, and I had just landed a new job. I was so excited about starting the new job that I decided to take myself out to "celebrate" by buying chicken nuggets and a caramel frappe from McDonald’s. The breading from the first darn chicken nugget managed to cut the inside of my throat and I couldn't speak for two days…
9. Food For Thought
I used to treat myself to foods that I enjoyed, but it backfired so horribly. It ended up with me developing a very serious binge eating disorder. I struggled with binge eating for the entirety of my teenage years, as well as the shame and guilt and disgust that came after a binge. All of those feelings were things that I would just ignore.
I also convinced myself to not see them as problematic because I was “treating myself.” Here are some of my worst examples of binge eating that I can remember: Two Jimmy John’s sandwiches, and cookies and chips, followed by a giant bowl of leftover spaghetti, an entire box of baked ravioli, and two bottles of sparkling grape juice.
That was all in one sitting, and all under the guise of treating myself and rewarding myself for something or other. On another occasion, I ate an entire loaf of Italian bread with butter, followed by half a tub of ice cream, a party size bag of salt and vinegar potato chips, and two entire boxes of macaroni and cheese.
Another time, I had three full overstuffed, large takeout boxes of buffet food, which I washed down with too much Dr. Pepper. And another time, I ate an entire party size bag of corn chips, followed by a whole jar of Tostitos queso blanco, a box of Swiss Rolls, three Monster energy drinks, and two blocks of dry ramen with the seasoning on them.
The regret that followed was usually in the form of throwing up, because I was so full and physically couldn’t contain everything that I had consumed. But that wasn't all. I bruised my stomach, which made it very difficult to move. It also, obviously, made me feel like total garbage overall, both physically and emotionally.
Luckily, I am on a medication now for dealing with my issues and I have gone to therapy, so my binges are very few and far between. Those I listed all took place when I was between the ages of 13 and 19 years old. I’m 22 now, and healthier than I have ever been in my life. I don’t drink sugary drinks or eat any processed foods.
I rarely get takeout, and I have significantly increased my fruit and vegetable intake. The best part is that I can stick to normal portion sizes. Even the thought of the way I constantly caved and stuffed myself before is disturbing to me now, and I could never imagine doing it again. I really wonder how many years I took off my life by eating like that.
The moral of the story, as far as I’m concerned, is don’t treat yourself with lots of food multiple days of the week. Find professional help instead. I'm currently on medication that's primarily used for treating ADD and ADHD in adults, but it is also used in the treatment of certain eating disorders. It's not perfect, but it works for me.
It doesn’t necessarily decrease my appetite as much as it just keeps me from going blackhole on my kitchen. In my experience, it makes me significantly less impulsive, which has been crucial in managing my binge eating. If you are going through anything similar to my story, I would strongly suggest visiting a psychiatrist if you are able to and ask what they think would be best in your personal treatment.
Nothing is a one size fits all solution. I also recommend seeing a dietician if you can, and finding a counselor. Finding a counselor is absolutely imperative, in my view. A dietician can help you change your eating habits to healthier ones and get you on the road to recovering physically. They can also help you become more mindful of how food works in your body.
A counselor can help you address what triggers your binges and aid you in preventing them or coping with the aftermath if you do fall through. Eating disorders are a very psychological thing, so a counselor in addition to psychiatric treatment is so, so important in helping to get yourself better. Recovering from this was one of the hardest things I’ve ever done, but it has been worth every moment of the struggle.
Even now, I still binge if my medication refill is late for whatever reason, but not having unhealthy food in my house makes it much less destructive. You are not lazy, you do not "just lack discipline," and you are not a disgusting glutton. You simply have a mental switch that just flips itself on and makes you binge whether you want to or not.
This isn’t your fault, and you can overcome it. I didn’t think I ever would, but I somehow made it mostly out. It’s possible, I promise.
10. Rollin’ On A River
I once bought a pair of quad roller skates on a whim. By “on a whim,” I mean that I did absolutely no research before buying them. As it turns out, there is quite a bit of intricacy with skates. I had purchased a pair meant for speed, and meant for indoor rinks. My intended use was for outdoor skating. This resulted in me falling on my butt a million times outside.
I also had zero control over myself while gliding down my newly paved road. The pair that I had purchased was a second-hand pair of Rock GT-50's, which I got from someone in town since the closest storefront with stock was over an hour away. It looks comparable to images online, so I assume there were no modifications.
I eventually bought softer wheels meant for outdoors. I swapped the 95A wheels for a set of 78A. And wow, it made a huge difference! I should have done some research and saved myself a good chunk of money, plus a whole lot of embarrassment. I regret the spur of the moment purchase, but I am glad that I got the skates and new wheels!
11. Keep Your Eye On The Ball
I once bought a good-quality regulation pool table for myself. Its dimensions were 8' x 44" with all the accessories, and it cost me about $4,000. But after moving to a new location, I immediately regretted the purchase. There was no room for it. The only way I could possibly have kept it in the new place would have been to give up the dining room and replace the dining room chandelier with a billiards light fixture.
12. Get The Picture?
I once bought myself a telescope, but then I needed a camera to take pictures with it. Then I needed a camera and a smaller scope to guide it. Then I needed a better, more expensive mount. Then I needed another camera to help set up the more expensive mount. Then I needed cases and storage for all this stuff. And then another camera. And then a star tracker.
Next thing I know, I all of a sudden have thousands of dollars’ worth in gear that I’ve used exactly never because it’s freezing and cloudy out most of the good viewing season anyways.
13. Try And Picture That!
I caught myself, but I was about to buy an expensive speaker system for myself off of eBay for about $800. Then I noticed one disturbing detail. It turns out, when you read the fine print, they were actually just selling a picture of the speaker system and not the system itself. It was a complete scam and their goal was to get bots to buy it. But I didn’t read the description carefully at first and almost bought it.
14. Little By Little And Bit By Bit
Just a few years ago, I dropped $1,000 on a gaming PC when I was a sophomore in college. I took out a new credit card to put the expense on. And, uh, let’s just say I grossly overestimated my ability to consistently make anything more than the absolute minimum payments. I ended up finally paying it off something like two years later, having paid probably an extra $300 in interest.
But, on the bright side, I learned a valuable lesson, and also had a better PC than all my friends for a few years!
15. Betting The Farm
One time, I treated myself by taking a trip to Las Vegas. As you can imagine, like many people who go down there, I very quickly spent and lost more money than I had intended. I had an absolute blast on the trip, but flash forward a month later. I had nothing to pay my car payment with when it was due, and in Florida if you are late by even just a single month, then they can repo your car. They did.
16. Heart And Sole
I once tried to treat myself by buying myself a pair of Louboutin shoes. For those who do not know, these are very expensive and very fancy. As soon as I brought the shoes home and wore them for the first time, I made a sad discovery. Turns out, they are very, very uncomfortable. Also, the famous red sole wears away incredibly quickly, and the heels easily got scraped on grates. Well, I lived somewhere with lots of grates.
17. An Apple A Day Keeps The Wealth Away
The “treat myself” purchases that I regret the most are pretty much every new Apple product that comes out, that I always rush to buy on the first day. Even if I don’t necessarily need it! Yeah, I’m one of those people you always hear about. For example, I recently bought the newest iPad that came out. So now, when I’m bored, instead of scrolling on my phone, I can go be bored scrolling on a bigger version of my phone.
Yay! Totally worth the new financial difficulties, right?
18. A Hair-Raising Tale
After years of wanting to experiment with my hair, I finally convinced myself that dyeing my long, healthy brown hair purple was the best way to treat myself. I was originally quoted a price of $150 give or take, depending on the amount of dye that would ultimately be used. Anyway, when she was done styling, I was happy with the job and it looked pretty.
I got to the counter, and the total on the bill came to $500!! Now, I'm not a confrontational person. Also, I was young and kind of stupid, so I didn’t argue with them. As much as I regret it, I just paid my bill, left a $50 mandatory gratuity, and left. I know. I was stupid. But that’s only the beginning of the story. Things were about to get so much worse...
For the next two weeks, everything that came in contact with my hair was stained purple. Every single time that I washed my hair, it bled purple. My shower floor was stained, as was the skin on my back, pillowcase, sheets, and even the back of all my shirts. All I could see everywhere I looked was PURPLE! I can’t even begin to tell you how much I started to absolutely despise that color!
And the worst part of all was that my long beautiful healthy brown hair was now just a heaping faded broken pile of straw after those two weeks finally came to an end. So, I had to go out and buy a box of dye that was as similar in hue as I could find to my own natural hair color. I then dyed my hair back to its old look and swore off ever dyeing my hair again for as long as I live.
19. Tuning This One Out
I decided to treat myself by subscribing to the Sirius XM radio deal for my car, where I committed to pay $30 a month for a six-month minimum. I thought that this was a wise purchase, since when I do drive, it's always a long cross-state trip. The only problem is that those trips are very few and far between, and so I hardly ever ended up using it.
Nevertheless, I forgot to cancel or at least threaten to cancel when I realized that I wouldn’t be needing it anymore, so I got charged $120 for the next six months for a service that I literally never used during that time. People, please think carefully before making an impulsive purchase! Everything seems exciting before you buy it, but ask yourself how much you will really be using it and if the cost is truly worth it for you.
20. Making A Concerted Effort
I once bought a ticket to a concert as a birthday present for myself. This was a disaster waiting to happen. While at the concert, I was having such a great time that I got way too intoxicated and crashed my car on the way home. I received an intoxicated driving charge and totaled my car. After getting another similar charge shortly after, I realized that I had a serious problem.
So, the good news is that I got help, and I am now more than three years sober.
21. Screwing Up Royally
I had not eaten anything from Burger King in at least 10 years. Until last week, when a buddy of mine at work said that he was going to grab some food from there. I figured “Man, I miss Double Whoppers! I want one!” So I decided to throw caution to the wind and get something with him as a little treat. What could possibly go wrong?
So I got the burger, ate it, and loved it. Then, an hour later, I'm eating pepto and running back and forth to the bathroom. Yeah, there was a reason I didn't eat it for 10 years...
22. Car Trouble
I bought myself a BMW 135 just as a fun treat, even though I already had a perfectly good Nissan that was all paid off and working well. I was young and dumb at the time and had just started making serious money for the first time in my life, so when I looked at that monthly payment I said, "This is fine, I can totally make this." I soon found out I was so, so wrong about that.
I was completely not taking into account all of the other bills that can suddenly crop up. One of the worst financial decisions that I have ever made, easily.
23. Dry Humor
I regret every single time that I’ve eaten an entire bag of dried mangoes in a day. They’re fairly small bags, and I love them so much, so I never think it will be a big deal. But each bag is still more fiber than an entire day’s worth, so it all comes out at once the next morning. So, every time I see a bag of dried mangoes, I go through a whole inner conflict about whether it’s worth it.
24. A New Neck Of The Woods
Substances are used and sold out in the open in a certain area of San Francisco, and the authorities apparently will not punish you or intervene. In fact, several non-profits wander about trying to employ harm reduction models and give out free rigs and other ways to try to keep things sanitary for the users that you’ll find in the streets.
I wanted to test this hypothesis when I heard about it. In a weird way, I thought it would be an interesting adventure to see if I could find the sellers that were doing this and get them to offer me something. It was a unique way of trying to treat myself. It was very dumb of me. Because, as it turns out, yes, you can buy whatever you want on the street there.
Everything from prescription pills to extremely harmful substances. Whatever you can imagine. It's kinda sad really when you see all the people strung out and desperate, but also fascinating how out even in front of the officers everyone uses and they are instructed to do nothing about it. Sadly, my plan backfired when I found a seller and felt pressured to spend a bunch of money on substances that I had no intention of actually using…
25. Two For The Use Of None
My darling boyfriend got into streaming. He gained a small following speed-running games, and he had some fun while doing so. During the height of all this fame for him, I thought hey, I'd give it a try as well. I streamed my Sims builds like once or twice, but for a multitude of reasons just thought it wasn't for me in the end.
One of those reasons being that I don't know anything about the tech, and so I just swapped out my laptop for my boyfriend's when I streamed. My boyfriend has this fancy device called an “el gato” capture thing. When he saw that I wanted to get into it, he bought me one as well. This thing was not cheap in the slightest, as everyone and their mother wanted one of these things to try their hand at online broadcasting.
So I was not happy at all about the situation. But his reasoning was that "we can both stream at the same time and do dual streams!" He had such good intentions, but for someone who knows so much about the technology and setup, he ought to have known that we combined simply don't have a powerful enough computer to dual-stream the way he had wanted to.
I know he just wanted this to be a fun little activity that we could both do together, so he treated himself and me, I guess, to a second el gato device. And it has never been used a single time because, as I said before, we physically do not have the ability to use if for what he had wanted to. Now he doesn't stream at all anymore. So at this point, we have a grand total of two unused el gatos.
26. Old Habits Are Hard To Beat
I was feeling terrible because of a recent breakup and a few other things. Then one day, I got a thousand dollars from a tax return straight to my bank account. So I decided to go out and get some highly dangerous substances, thinking I could have fun using them. I had been clean for several months and felt like I could treat myself and temporarily feel a little better, just this once.
Well, it's been months now and I am once again trapped in this stupid addiction. Though thankfully I’m slowly digging myself out of it again. It just sucks that I had to fall back to where I was before and basically undo all the hard work I did to quit the first time. At least I learned that, for me, when it comes to opioids and substance use, it's all or nothing.
When I wasn't using, it was super easy for me to stay clean and I never had any cravings, but as soon as I decide to use "just this once" I always go back to daily use eventually. This particular time, it took me many months to get back into a situation where things were out of hand. But eventually, inevitably, it always gets to that point for me. One-hundred percent of the time, with no exception.
27. Does Not Compute
I recently bought myself a laptop from the electronics website Razer. I thought spending some money on a new computer was a reasonable way for me to treat myself. Turns out, it was one of the worst decisions that I have ever made in my entire life. I already had to send it back to them once. Now, it's just out of warranty and I’m again having more problems with it. Never again.
28. A Bad Time For Buying
I was manic and went shopping. Next thing I knew, I had spent 4,000 dollars on Lasik eye surgery, new furniture, a new MacBook computer, a bunch of new shoes and clothes, a trip to Mexico, and a bunch of unhealthy substances and drinks. I kept telling myself “You deserve it. Treat yourself.” A few months later, I was working on paying all this stuff off.
The moral of the story is don’t go on a shopping spree during a manic episode! Wait until you’re thinking straight again before you make consequential decisions.
29. Quite The Story
I spent a bunch of money to buy the video game “Minecraft: Story Mode.” I had just won fifty bucks in a Halloween raffle and I really thought that the game sounded cool, so I decided to treat myself and buy a copy of it using the money I had won. I was all excited to play it for the first time...only to discover that I did not actually enjoy the game. Why the heck did I not research that hot mess of garbage first??
30. Fight Like Gel
I once bought myself a "luxurious" body gel. I used it one time, and instantly got an allergic reaction to it. My left leg doubled in size because of how swollen it was. It hurt and was stinging like heck for the next few days. The whole thing was just a complete disaster overall. Also, the gel was a total ripoff. The bottle was not even 90 ml, and it cost me more than 180 bucks. Screw you, company that made this garbage!
31. Day One Was Your Peak
I got a promotion that meant I would be driving most days to an office after I had been commuting by train for years. I immediately bought myself a Tesla as a treat, so I would be able to enjoy the new ride. I drove it to work for the first time on March 14 of last year. Yes, last year was 2020. And yes, March was the month when the entire world shut down.
So I have not driven to the office once since that first day. Between the initial down payment and the monthly payments I’ve had to make on the car ever since, I’ve spent about $7 a mile to own the thing.
32. All About That Bass
I once bought myself a used bass amp off of eBay. It was a little pricey but after hundreds of eBay purchases, I didn’t think anything could go wrong. Well, everything went wrong. The amp showed up broken, despite being advertised as in working condition. I took it to a shop. It turned out the seller had gutted it and poorly replaced a bunch of the parts with parts from a guitar amp, despite it being a bass amp.
So even once I spent money to fix it, it was still unusable. I got into it with the eBay seller and they threatened to come to my house and fight me. All because I wanted to treat myself to a new amp on my birthday...
33. Meat Me In The Middle
This just happened the other day. I had some leftover taco meat, cheese, and taco sauce in my fridge, but no tortillas. So, I decided to make myself some nachos as a nice little treat. The problem was that I didn’t have any tortilla chips either, so I used Triscuits instead. I really felt the depths of my mistake as I sat on the toilet for hours afterwards…
34. It Ain't Over Till It’s Over
I spent 1,500 dollars on a body transformation programme. It worked. By the end of it, I was super fit and feeling happy with my purchase. But right after that, I had a number of significant personal events happen during a short period of time and I got into a serious depression hole. This quickly led to me putting all the weight right back on. So I effectively squandered the 1,500 dollars.
35. What A Difference A Year Makes
I’m not sure if this would be called a "treat yourself" matter, but here you go anyway. I was feeling depressed for years at this point and it was pretty overwhelming. I was very tired and I just wanted everything to stop. With that thought, I literally ran away from my responsibilities that I felt were weighing on me and causing me to feel this way.
I figured that I deserved a break from all the things that were stressing me out. So, I just spent some time doing nothing but leisure activities such as going to parks and walking while taking photographs with my camera, going to cafés alone, etc. Well, those did not happen without me skipping school. Sure, it was good and all at the time.
But now I have had to spend a year repeating all the school courses that I abandoned at the time. I have also had to pay for the compensation fee in our university. This is sad to say, but I now feel like what I did wasn't worth it at all in the long run. I guess it's true when they say "You reap what you sow," and what I reaped ain’t good...
36. Looking Back
My biggest “treat yourself” regret is the amount of time I spent just “chilling” when I should have been working. The funny thing is that when I look back, I realized that I never regretted “chilling” when I was in those moments. It was always justified in my head. What I do regret is that it was all just a form of procrastination. It became a cornerstone habit which really defined how my life turned out.
Now I am here, at age 40, wondering where all the time went, and with very little to show for it.
37. When Bad Is Good
In a weird way, I tried to treat myself by always thinking only about the future and doing whatever I thought was “responsible.” By the age of 38, all I ever did was work, work, work. I was overweight, my libido was declining rapidly, and it was hard to meet someone in my city who was single unless they were half my age. And why would they want to meet some creepy old dude?
I’ve been single for a decade now, and I was miserable. I spent all that time pinching every penny, hoping to maybe buy a house in cash, waiting to start my life. But the cost of living kept skyrocketing while wages barely kept up. I know I'm not even technically middle-aged yet, but I never went to concerts, traveled, or did anything fun.
Nope, I dedicated myself to two different careers that brought me no fulfillment. But then I decided to make a huge change. I quit my job and have spent the last year living off savings and just writing poetry and watching foreign films. Screw it. My money will run out eventually, but I don't care. It was all for nothing anyhow. Still, there is a dark side.
I've thought about just living like this for a while and then taking my own life once my savings run out. I don't care. This past year has been the happiest year of my life. I never want to go back to the real world. Three degrees, two careers, two decades. A waste. But this is bliss. No boss or co-workers eager to gaslight. No entitled clientele. No fake corporate speak. Just me time.
No pretending that material things matter. No pretending at all, actually. This is the best.
38. All About Looks
My big regret is spending $200 on a sonic screwdriver replica prop from the show Doctor Who. The prop is wonderfully made, but it helped me realize that a replica doesn't mean that it works like I thought it would. It only looks like the actual show prop. Also, I bought myself some tarot cards for $150. Very nice, slick, and thick cards that have great art on them.
They look and feel amazing and they have a cool box. But I don't use or read tarot cards. I just thought they looked cool, but I haven't really done anything with them.
39. Not Very Clean
I recently decided to treat myself by going to a dentist for a cleaning and to get some teeth fixed. This was my first dentist’s appointment in almost a decade. He had a student assistant with him. She didn't know how to use the instruments and jammed them into the side of my mouth. She ended up cutting my cheek and one of my gums so badly that I couldn't eat for a week.
40. Size Matters
It's not much, but I was at a store called "A Little Bit of Everything." It’s a store that sells pretty much all kinds of stuff. So anyway, I am a huge Star Trek nerd. They had a Special Edition of the board game Star Trek Scene It. The box is huge, but for $60 I couldn't pass it up. So, before I bought it, I checked online and saw that it normally sold for $120.
I bought two of them, with the hope of selling one on eBay, basically getting mine for free in the process. Well, the boxes were indeed huge. I could not find a large enough box to even ship it with and I bet shipping would've erased my profits. Long story short, I still have the second one in my parents’ basement. I took mine with me when I moved.
41. One Track Mind
Over the years, I have bought myself way too many video games. I just turned 21, but growing up we moved a lot and I used video games to cope. Slowly but surely, they just became my entire life. Because of this, I now don't have any real world experience or many interests. Thankfully, though, I work full time, so I'm starting to turn this around.
42. Toying With Your Heart
My biggest “treat yourself” regret is every single time that I've ever bought an adult toy. Each time, the toy is lots of fun to play with for the first time. And then, as soon as I’m done using it, I just stare at it and go: "Why the heck did I throw $200 away for this thing?" All of these toys are extremely expensive, and I’m never thinking rationally when I’m in the mood to make the purchase.
43. Sounds Like Someone Is Getting Board
I spent around 300 dollars on all the Talisman board games and a further 200 dollars on a custom made box to keep them all in it. I thought it would be a fun treat for me to start having guests over and playing with. Then, almost immediately after I bought the whole collection, the big C hit. As a result, I have not been allowed to have guests over and I've played the games just once.
44. A Vicious Cycle
I once ate very decadently to reward myself for exercising, thereby completely undermining all of my efforts to get in shape. Isn’t that a paradox!
45. Phoning It In
I’m currently typing this answer on a cell phone that cost me almost 2,000 dollars. There is no way I can justify this. I clearly bought it out of peer pressure…
46. All Play And No Work Makes Jack A Poor Boy
My “treat myself” regrets are half my video games that I’ve paid for and have sitting unused on my Steam account. When will I ever have the time to play all of these?
47. Losing Money In Style
I recently decided to treat myself and bought a new set of fancy rims for my car. I soon realized that they looked good, but were completely unnecessary. And there goes yet another nice chunk of money that I’ll never see again…
48. When Your Heart’s Not In It
Oh, I win this question hands down. Every Halloween, my friends and I go out to celebrate at an old brewery in our town. The brewery goes all out for Halloween, with an attached hotel. It's the best place to party for the holiday. The day of the party in 2019 was my last day working before a much-needed vacation. I had just started a new position with my company and I was totally burned out.
I had to work late that night, so I couldn't meet up with my friends until about three hours after everyone else was already together. By the time I arrived, everyone was already pretty buzzed and I felt like I needed to catch up. So, I shotgunned three 11% drinks and was feeling pretty good. This happened at approximately 10:00 pm.
I wanted to treat myself to a good night after such a long few weeks, plus I was off the next day. So I figured no matter how crazy I went, I could probably recover from the hangover the next day without much trouble. That later proved to have been a bad calculation on my part. We left the bar at 1:30 in the morning, and took an Uber back to the apartment of one of my friends.
By that point, I had consumed the three drinks from earlier, plus another two 11% ones, two Long Islands, one “Trash Can,” two tequila shots, and a green tea shot. All in roughly three hours or so. Keep in mind that I was 29 years old at the time, but still thought I could drink like I was 21. I got to their place and crashed on a sofa, still fully coherent.
At about 4:00 in the morning, I woke up with my heart racing. I didn't think much of it and went back to sleep. I then woke up again at 8:00, and it was still pounding. I figured I just needed some water and food and I'd be fine. Fast forward to the afternoon, and my heart still has not slowed down at all. I decided to go to the nearest emergency room, and had an EKG done.
My resting heart rate was up to 182 bpm. I was admitted and diagnosed with “holiday heart.” For those unfamiliar with this term, it's essentially a drinking-induced Atrial Fibrillation. I had to have my heart shocked back into rhythm, and spent the rest of my vacation at home wearing a heart monitor. So yea, I drank too much to celebrate a vacation and had to get my heart restarted. So much for treating myself and relaxing!
49. Snow Day
I once bought a pair of used snowmobiles for two thousand dollars. I had them for two years. The first year, my wife and I both got the flu during the one week when the snowmobile trails were open. So we never got to use them. Then, the second year, my wife was pregnant so we couldn’t really do much in terms of active physical activities. So we decided to sell the snowmobiles.
That’s when we discovered that one of them no longer wanted to start and the other one runs but now has issues. We ended up selling the pair for just 500 dollars. We literally never once used them besides unloading them from the trailer when we bought them.
50. Cruising Down The River
Not that long ago, I thought to myself one day: “You know what? I've never been on a cruise in my life. I want to go on a cruise right now!” So I booked a two-week Caribbean cruise, in a private suite, for just me and the wife. That's when it all unraveled. For some unknown reason, immediately upon arrival to said cruise, the wife decided that she didn't like me anymore.
And so, she spent the entire two weeks of the cruise avoiding me, meaning that I spent two weeks on my own on this bloody ship. We're divorced now.