Everyone has secrets, ranging from minor white lies to dark knowledge that will never be shared. These Redditors took the opportunity to share their secrets under the anonymity of the internet.
1. The Sister’s Secret
For years, my mom received birthday cards with money in them from her parents. She kept the cards with the money in them, saving to buy a piano and for sentimental reasons. What my sister did to her is unforgivable. She'd repeatedly taken from family members over the years, but when she found the collection of cards/money and took them, this was a new low.
My mom only wanted the cards back when she realized what happened. My sister denied everything.
2. Multiple Secrets Here
After my husband passed in 2020, that's when I finally learned his disturbing secrets. I found out he had been having an affair with a 30-year-old (he was 55). Also, everything he told me about his prior life was a lie (second marriage for both of us) and he had been sleeping with men since he was in his early 20s.
To sum it up, I didn't know this man at all. We had been together 10 years and married for 6.
3. There’s No Closure Here
For the 24 hours before my dad passed, we were unable to be with him because of hospital Covid rules. My mother, sister, and myself had been texting and calling him all day and got no response. My mother even called the hospital and spoke with one of his ICU nurses, who said he was awake and communicating fine.
He passed very quickly at 3:30 am the next morning. We were allowed to be at his bedside but by then he was no longer conscious, so we said our goodbyes and he was gone. Later that morning, while my mom slept, I was calling cremation services to schedule his body for pick up at the hospital and going through his bag of belongings the hospital had returned to us. His phone was in there and I wanted to read all of our texts and take some comfort in my last words to him.
I opened his phone and all of our texts had not been read, not mine nor my mom and sister’s. I thought this was so odd but figured he must have been suffering so much he couldn’t find the strength. I began to scroll through his apps and noticed a chat app I’d vaguely heard of. I can’t recall the name but it essentially works like WhatsApp. That's when I made a discovery that will haunt me forever.
I opened the app and saw a single contact with a female name. I started reading and realized my dad had been chatting with this girl hourly for the last 24 hours, and as far back as I could scroll. He was calling her princess and telling her he loved her and she was saying she was scared for him and wanted to know what was going on, why he was in the ER, etc. I scrolled back enough to know that this was someone he was having, at the very least, an emotional affair with.
My grief was completely erased by hurt and anger—but it still gets so much worse. A week later I tracked the girl down and spoke to her (via DM) and found out she was 19 years old. She was only 17 when they met. He was her high school bus driver and she told me they had been dating for almost 2 years.
My dad was 66 years old when he passed and still dating someone younger than his grandchildren, someone he chose to spend his last moments with and say his last goodbyes to. I hope it made him happy but it sure is a terrible secret to live the rest of my life with. A secret that will forever overshadow my entire relationship with my dad with no chance to ever speak to him about it. It’s the one secret I wish I’d never found out.
4. Documenting Bad Behavior
Two weeks after I had my daughter, I found out my father and my mother-in-law were having a gross affair.
I say gross because my mother-in-law’s boyfriend at the time found out by logging into her Facebook. She was having so many casual relations, with random people, and had photos and videos to prove everything.
The boyfriend showed it all to my husband, my husband showed it to me, and we had to move out of his mom’s place. We were helping her pay her rent and even better, this was during the Covid lockdown. I stopped talking to my father and my husband has very limited contact with his mother now.
I find it gross because they were both in committed relationships and both preached Christianity and being chaste and all that. It just all gives me the ick.
5. Almost Came Between Them
She was my best friend of 7 years; we had literally been through it all together. I moved out of state with my now husband, but she convinced us both to move back to be closer with her, after about a year. We had no real ties to the state we had tried out, so we said why not, let’s go back, she’s basically family. We were all so happy to be reunited; she was over almost every night for dinner, we all laughed and talked and had a blast. Best year of my life.
Then slowly, I started to notice something was...different. When I realized what she was doing, I felt sick: She was trying to turn my husband and I against each other. Any time we had an argument (like any couple does), she would text each of us about how right we were; trying to foster animosity between the two of us.
With me, she started talking about how she had a plan b for “us”, that if my husband and I couldn’t make it work, I could move in with her and we’d live happy lives together.
With my husband, she started talking about her infertility issues and how she wanted to have a kid just like him, she just needed a donor.
This all happened at around the same time, and my husband and I compared texts and figured it out.
She wanted to take his sperm and raise a baby with me. When confronted about it, she refused to admit anything. Then things got scary. She started lashing out at both of us. It got to the point where she would show up unannounced, banging on the door, demanding a place in our home. It was so terrifying and panic-inducing that we ended up having to move and change our phone numbers.
I guess it’s so disturbing because I had never had a friend like her, only to find out that she, well, she cared about me, but in such an unhealthy and scary way. But yeah, that’s my story.
Husband and I are great now, by the way.
6. At Least He Had Another, Better Family
My grandma had 12 kids. The second oldest son was mentally challenged and lived with her her whole life.
When she passed, about 10 of us went over and renovated the house. We got Gran's trinkets out, fixed our mentally challenged family member up with a new bed, new TV, new appliances, demolished a few walls, and really made the place just for him. Then his own sister committed the cruelest betrayal I've ever seen.
Shortly after, one of our aunts came to visit. She slept in the bed and left him in a cot, took him to the bank, and attached herself to the account (he took the whole inheritance), making purchases off his account, and then she started moving all the valuable things out of the house.
I lived closest, about 40 minutes away, and when I went to visit the next month, it looked like the house had been looted and the aunt had moved back to hers, 5 hours away.
This mentally challenged uncle lived a few years on his own until we realized how constantly people tried to take advantage of him, then we moved him into a facility. A mentally challenged 70-year-old in a suburban bungalow with just enough to suit the basic necessities. Disgusting, the humans out there.
7. Maybe He Was Actually D.B. Cooper
When my grandfather passed, we discovered that he did not exist. His name was not in any government registry. He was a normal citizen, paid taxes, had a license and everything. He lived a long life, was married to my grandmother for over 50 years, had multiple children, and everything was normal.
Still to this day, no one knows who he really was and why he had a false name.
Cast Of Thousands, Shutterstock
8. Forced Emancipation
I remember one kid in my classroom that stunk, his clothes were always ratty, and everyone laughed at him and ostracized him. He was a big kid and despite his size he never acted out except once in the middle of class when a teacher told him (in front of everyone) that he needed to shower. It wasn't until I was an adult that I found out the heartbreaking truth.
His parents essentially abandoned him. This wasn't just a stinky kid. It was a kid raising himself—yet he kept it all to himself. He carried that burden alone. I try to tell my kids to be nice to anyone who is different. We don't know what their story is, and differences are what make us unique.
9. A Good Reason Not To Go Back
I found out that the reason why one of my uncles didn't want to go back to Korea when he retired was that he couldn't—he was fearful of political reprisals if he tried to return.
It turned out his brother was part of the group that removed the S. Korean president back in 1979 and his own innocence was never proven so he was in fear of getting taken in by the authorities if he ever tried to go back.
Inside Creative House, Shutterstock
10. That’s One Way To Save For Retirement
My great-grandmother was married to three different people at the same time. The men were from different branches of the armed forces and she was collecting all three of their paychecks at a time.
11. The Ultimate Betrayal
I wasn't close to this person but I did hang out with them a few times. The best man at my wedding had another really close friend who turned out to be a serial killer. It messed him up really badly. He already had mental health issues and this sent him over the edge. I can't even talk to him anymore.
12. The Selfish Brother
My brother was stealing money from our father who had dementia. This went on for a year and the only reason I found out about it was because the bank who had my father's mortgage called me wondering why it hadn't been paid in six months.
My father's bank account went into the negative around this time too. When I confronted my brother, his response was disgusting: "Well, I gotta pay MY bills".
I was about to take control of all the accounts and make sure everything got back on track but my father ended up in the hospital and passed shortly after that. My brother also took some of my inheritance too.
In the end, he took over $5,000 from his fading father.
Edler von Rabenstein, Shutterstock
13. The Silent Treatment
I graduated from boot camp and wondered why my brother wouldn’t talk to me. I wish I'd never learned the truth. Turned out he was sleeping with my ex while I was at camp, instead of delivering my letters. I guess guilt ate him up and he thought it was simpler to keep up the lie and not have a brother. He never would have told me, I only learned about it because a friend finally spilled the beans.
LightField Studios, Shutterstock
14. The Long-Distance Child
My best friend confessed to me that he has a child as a result of a long-distance affair in another country. He has three kids in the US and is in a terrible marriage. His wife doesn't know.
15. The Dodgy Uncle
When I was young I had vague ideas about my uncle being dodgy. At family events such as weddings, my parents would tell me and some of my cousins to stay away from him.
When I was in year 8, we were doing a lesson in citizenship class where we had to cut out pieces from a newspaper. I looked at one page and couldn't believe my eyes: There was a photo of my uncle, and an article saying he went to prison. Went home and googled him and found out he’d been in prison in the 80s for kidnapping someone, and had been in and out of prison since for other offenses.
He also tried to sue The Sun once for defamation since they printed something incorrect about him. He actually won…but it was agreed that what they had printed couldn’t have damaged his reputation any further.
16. The Paranoid Granny
So my grandmother (who’s been estranged from my family for a long time now for a MULTITUDE of reasons) has this weird thing where she has to share food with people.
Are you ordering steak at the restaurant? Well, oh boy, she’s gotta order the same thing even if she doesn’t like steak. Try her drink: “It’s really good”! Take the first bite of chicken to let her know if it’s “any good”.
This always really annoyed me cause I hate sharing food. One day I brought it up to my mom and she finally revealed the reason: “Oh yeah, Grandma is afraid of being poisoned, so she wants other people to try it first”.
SO LET ME GET THIS STRAIGHT, GRANDMA THINKS SOMEONE IS TRYING TO POISON HER SO SHE HAS ME TRY THE FOOD FIRST??? And it makes so much sense looking back because she literally would not take a bite of anything she ordered until someone else had a bite first. Thanks, Grandma.
17. Temporary Insanity
My grandfather has taken a life. My dad was an only child, but my grandmother was once pregnant with my dad’s younger brother. When she was 6 months pregnant, someone in construction equipment ran over the car she was driving and she lost the baby.
While she was in the hospital, my grandfather found the guy and just...ended him. Brutally. From what I understand, he was in custody for about a week before he was released. Apparently, he claimed temporary insanity due to the circumstances.
I learned all this about 4 years ago when my brother was researching family history and asked my grandfather about it. I've always seen him as a nice little old man.
18. The Rolex
I discovered that my sister took my father's $25k Rolex no more than 24 hours after he passed. I only discovered it when her and her husband made a frivolous purchase and I wondered where they got their money since they were always broke and begging my parents for money.
I got suspicious and it hit me that she might have taken and sold the Rolex. I had the paperwork, so I ran a track on the sales history and discovered it had been sold to a pawn shop down the street from where my sister lives. I went to the pawn shop and after a bit of persuasion got them to tell me who sold it to them and it was my sister. Me and my mom disowned her.
19. Don’t Lie To The Government
A work colleague appeared on the front page of a national newspaper for a life of fraudulent qualifications. He claimed he had medical and law degrees. He claimed he was a Brigadier in the army (reserves) and the CEO for a major health fund.
He actually was a Brigadier in the army reserves, but that and the health fund role were largely built on the fraudulent qualifications and a progression of jobs also based on these claims. In reality, the only qualification he actually held was as a mortuary assistant. Not even his wife knew.
The fraudulent degrees had been gained when he was in the army reserves recruiting office and he had access to submitted position applications. He came undone when he applied for a government job and some flags were raised by the recruitment people. He tried to withdraw the application but didn’t realize that an application for a government role has the same weight as a statutory declaration and cannot be withdrawn. It all went south very quickly and he ended up doing some serious time.
20. The Lying Brother
My brother was in the Armed Forces 30 years ago. He recently admitted he wasn't stationed in an undisclosable location during that time—in fact, he was actually in prison for manslaughter. He got into an off-duty drunken dispute in a bar.
21. Light Of His Life
My (former) best friend cheated on his wife multiple times. I found out because he tried getting me to cheat on my wife. Bonus: he was the best man at our wedding.
22. The Treasurer
I purposely tanked a church's finances while I was their treasurer.
Both pastors were making obscene amounts of money for the lack of work they were doing. They were misusing funds to the tune of $5k a month.
One pastor refused to abide by the direction of the board not to give money to certain individuals. None of the board members wanted to be the bad guy. The pastors technically weren't doing anything the law didn’t allow. It was just morally reprehensible. I couldn't let them get away with it.
It happened 10 years ago and everyone that isn't in the know thinks I made a few clerical errors that nearly put the church under. I'm a fairly hated person by a lot of people to this day, but super respected by a handful of people that knew that I did it on purpose to expose them. The pastors couldn't get the authorities involved because they knew I would sink both of their careers and family dynamics.
No regrets at all about what I did.
23. Adding Insult to Injury
My mom cheated on my dad for 20 years and still hasn’t told him to this day. I’m still trying to figure out what to do and how to go about the situation, but I’m afraid exposing the truth about her to my Dad would break his heart.
But do you want to hear the worst part? She cheated with my Godfather, who used to come to the house and drink coffee with my mom and dad EVERY DAY.
Krakenimages.com, Shutterstock
24. The Generous Donation
I have a son.
Nobody but me and the mother knows. The mother was a really really good friend who was somewhat homely and had never had a boyfriend, though she was in her early 40s. She always wanted a husband and a child but decided if she couldn’t get a husband then she would have a child.
$12K later, she was artificially inseminated with a whopping 12 percent chance of it taking. Well, it didn’t take and she was on a teacher’s salary. Her dream of kids and marriage was drifting away and especially with the kid, time was of the essence.
So I stepped up. We hashed it all out and we decided the story would be she got artificially inseminated and doesn’t know the father. We went to a lawyer and paid a good little amount to basically absolve me of responsibility. To this day I see it like I donated to a bank and somebody used my contribution.
It would’ve been 12K a pop every time she tried and with this method she could try as many times as it took. Luckily, it only took a couple tries. We’d wait till she was ovulating and I’d “donate”.
So technically I have a son, but everybody thinks I’m childless.
Krakenimages.com, Shutterstock
25. Waiting For A New Start
I live in a small town where more or less everybody knows everybody or has some sort of connection. I have family and friends here (some best, some close, some good, and some acquaintances).
Lately I’ve been feeling like everyone's forgotten about me or they just grew tired of me. They don't include me in major or minor gatherings, outings, or events anymore. We used to have a group chat but ever since me and another person in the group fought, it's just never been the same.
I reached out and tried to mend things, but it's just never been the same. I feel lonely and depressed and seeing everyone happy makes it worse. The majority of the time, I am by myself. They sometimes post about their gatherings and I know that they sometimes hide it from me (I know because I have a private account that they haven't hidden their post from).
It just sucks because I thought they were my friends, so why do they have to hide it from me? I want to disappear. When I have the money or opportunity, I'm contemplating cutting and leaving everything behind and starting from scratch somewhere else where no one knows me. At least there I'll be free.
26. The Enigmatic Grandfather
My grandfather is a ghost on paper. We always grew up knowing he had skeletons in his closet but I wasn't prepared for what he had done in his younger years. I started hearing rumors as a teen that he had been a pretty big time thief; his speciality was cracking safes. But he would never admit it.
In 2016, he randomly told me he also used to deal to the IRA. It was like he was talking about the weather. It was bizarre. He also told me he helped a couple of triads hide out in Jamaica after they went on the run for beheading an adversary. They were fairly nice guys according to him.
It was only about 10 years ago he finally stopped sleeping with weapons stashed under his bed and taking shady phone calls down in the bottom of the garden. Only my grandmother knows his real name; no one else in the family does.
I adore him but he is an enigma to me.
27. 23 And Me Strikes Again
My partner looked into her DNA and she found out her grandfather wasn't biological. Meaning, her mum's dad wasn't her real dad.
It turned out my partner’s grandmother had an affair which caused her to fall pregnant with my partner's mum. They traced the line all the way to Queensland, Australia–the other side of the country for us–and they've made contact with the biological grandfather/father.
It's a crazy story. This man minding his own business all of a sudden gets a message stating that he actually has a daughter he never knew about and four grandkids. It was very interesting to watch.
The original non-biological grandfather had passed years ago, so I guess he passed never knowing that his daughter was never actually his to begin with. The newfound dad/grandfather was actually stoked and he’s an unbelievably nice guy.
28. At Least He Was Caught
This person was close to my dad, as I was a child at the time. He would come over and play DnD with my dad and his friends.
One night, this man’s neighbors phoned the authorities as he was setting off "makeshift fireworks". Eventually, the authorities searched his place and discovered his twisted plan. Turns out, he had been planning on blowing up a Mosque, and was inspired by Anders Behring Breivik.
My dad gave witness evidence of a time when this friend offered him a piece of wall taken from a certain German dictator’s bunker.
29. Repressing The Trauma
When I found out that both of my best friends from way back were being investigated for domestic terrorism.
Or I should say ‘when I was reminded’, because apparently this happened while we were still friends and I was aware at the time. We had a lot of other issues so I guess I decided to throw that one on the back burner.
But it says a lot about my high school experience that THAT was the thing I decided to forget.
30. Layers Of Trouble
My friend shot his friend in the foot on purpose.
They were teens and playing with a weapon while under the influence. And he accidentally shot his friend in the foot. Except it wasn’t an accident. He admitted to it being on purpose later.
I’m not even an American and these kinds of weapons are super not allowed here. I have no idea how he acquired it. He could probably get in serious trouble just on the merit of that alone.
31. Too Young To Understand
When I was 5 years old, I knew my mother cheated on my father, without even having proper vocabulary to say anything. In hindsight, it was so freaking messed up. My mom took my sister and I to the hotel to meet him, and while my sister and I were in the other bed asleep, my mom slept with him. I knew, because the next morning I woke before my mom.
The covers on the other bed were up just enough that I could see mom wasn’t wearing any clothing. I didn't know exactly what this meant at the time, as I was only 5, but I knew I felt icky about it. A few years later I knew enough to understand what I knew.
Krakenimages.com, Shutterstock
32. Holier Than Thou
My ostensibly pious and God-fearing, married Mormon dad was siphoning off shared savings/retirement money to bankroll strip clubs, "massage" parlors, and visits to specific street corners for longer than my entire life. Had I not personally caught him red-handed, I would never have believed it. My gob is still smacked.
33. Betrayed By Their Own Mother
I discovered that my own mother paid bribes to my social services worker to make my life a living nightmare.
I was in foster care from 11 to 18 because she was mistreating me. I was under the state’s protection but suddenly got thrown in juvie without any reason. I got to endure other forms of revenge as well.
I finally got a lawyer at 16. He found all the evidence and got us in court. She lost the small amount of custody she still had, the social services worker got kicked out and banned from his profession, and I got my emancipation. The judge was not amused.
xavier gallego morell, Shutterstock
34. Finding An Extra Family
I was adopted, and my adoptive parents told me a silly, magical story about my birth parents that most certainly did not seem true even when I was a child.
At 57, I learned I was the result of a college affair between a very seriously Jewish young man and a very Baptist young woman. She was rushed off to a home for wayward girls to give birth. He followed her there (many states away), begging her to keep me and live a life together. But their families both said absolutely not. Jewish people were not viewed as "white" in the mid-60s, and her family most certainly did not want her marrying a non-white. Plus, she was a very committed Christian and did not want to convert to Judaism.
So off I went, into another family. I recently discovered three lovely half-siblings and we are all pro or semi-pro musicians and get along well. I never got to meet my mother; she passed a year before I searched. My father is out of the picture and wants to be left alone. And I'm fine with that; I'm grateful for the love he gave me. It was enough.
35. She Needs Therapy
During my wife's second trimester, she would stand next to the side of the bed where I slept, holding the black hand ax I use for outdoor stuff and general home defense. She would put the cat in the bathroom and stuff a towel at the bottom so I couldn't hear her scratches or meows. She stated that she would act out striking my neck, then my eyes, with some grim details.
Our daughter is almost three, and the cat sleeps on my chest since those days and hisses at her at night when she gets up to use the restroom. I was told this last week, and I don't know how to feel.
36. The Liar
My dad's whole life was outlandish fabrications and tall tales and outright lies. Honestly the most disturbing secret was uncovering, slowly as I grew up, that he was full of it and just a vanilla guy who preferred partying and getting messed up with his friends and talking big than actually doing anything with me.
I guess the secret is that he was a lousy dad. Heck of a fun uncle from what my cousins tell me, but not a good dad.
37. The Imaginary Lifetime
I have a secret fantasy life, populated with imaginary friends. It started in grade school, and I have continued all my life. I am in my 50s now, and still prefer to be alone in my imaginary world instead of being with family or friends. I can't even tell my psychiatrist because I am afraid he will lock me up or give me medicines to make it all stop.
Inside Creative House, Shutterstock
38. A Vengeful Reaction
When I was young (probably around age 9 or 10) I was walking home with my dog when he cut the corner and walked diagonally through the yard of this super mean old lady who lived at the end of the street.
She was in her yard at the time tending to these really fancy-looking rose bushes she had growing in beds along the border with her neighbor. My dog was a very friendly golden retriever who didn't even really come near her and certainly didn't do anything threatening. Her reaction was deranged. She sprayed him with some kind of insecticide or other chemical she was using on her roses.
I ran back home with the dog and hosed him off. He coughed a bunch, but seemed otherwise fine. I didn't tell my parents because somehow I thought I was going to get into trouble for letting the dog walk in her yard.
I'm glad I didn't tell them, though, because I decided that night to sneak downstairs, out the half-bath window, and down the street to her yard where I cut down every rose bush I could get my hands on.
Potashev Aleksandr, Shutterstock
39. Karma Has A Sense Of Humor
When I was a teenager, I worked at a novelty tourist shop near me. Being the idiot that I was, I took a bunch of cash from the store. It was $100 in ones.
I told nobody, but they knew it was missing. Right about the same time, a coworker who was always trying to get me fired was telling someone that she got about $100 in tips from her other job.
They ended up firing her because they didn’t trust that she wasn’t the thief.
40. Still Keeping The Secret
My wife, her mom, and I bought a house about two years ago. Just from talking to the neighbors I’d gathered that the family who lived here before had a daughter that was mixed up with the wrong people. Pretty soon, unsettling things started happening.
We had some random person knock on our door at night saying he needed gas…but we are down a long driveway, so no way you’d randomly walk up to OUR house to ask for help. I think he was looking for the people who used to live here. Another time: Sunday morning, making pancakes for the family, I get a knock on the door and it’s four officers saying they received an emergency call that hung up and it was from the house.
We don’t have a landline and I assured them my wife and 2-year-old did not make any call. They mentioned the name of the previous occupants and I let them know we moved in earlier this year and they seemed ok with that and left.
Later, I was doing some yard work and struck up a conversation with the neighbor, as he saw the cars and asked what was up. I told him the situation and he just went, “Oh yeah, that family was messed up, they were probably being cautious considering the incident”.
“What incident”? I asked.
He kinda looked at me with a sad, worried face. “The incident in your house”.
I was truly baffled. He then proceeded to tell me that about two years before, the father in the house confronted his daughter and the boyfriend he didn’t like and shot the boyfriend in the house.
Our state doesn’t have a disclosure law so we never knew. I was blown away; all the strange happenings kinda made sense now. He said the friends of the victim had terrorized them for a while because the authorities were taking so long to press charges: slashed tires, midnight fireworks, odd stuff that the neighbors hated.
I was shocked but just said, “That’s crazy, but hey do me a favor and never tell my wife or MIL about that. They are a little spooked by things like that”.
So the TL;DR is that we live in a murder house and I’m the only one of my family that knows.
41. No One Suspects The Good Kid
In high school, I was a super good kid. A straight-A student who loved homework, keeping out of trouble, and who was quiet during class.
There was this guy who was also in AP classes with me but he was super loud and obnoxious and would pull stunts in such a way that he would have some margin of plausible deniability. Though we never spoke (I’m not sure he even knew I existed), he rubbed me the wrong way. Maybe it was from when he would pretend to be friends with a kid who was definitely on the autism spectrum and desperate to be friends. He’d get the kid to do his homework for him and then make fun of him the next day.
So at random–sometimes once a week or a month or once every couple of months–I would whistle. It’s this high-pitched whistle that sounds like a tea kettle that I can do while barely moving my mouth. Back then, no one knew I could do it except for my family. The super obnoxious kid always got in trouble. I was never once suspected.
42. A Happy Ending
Six years ago, when I was 24, my mom randomly told me I have an older half-sister that my dad completely abandoned. She only knew my sister's mother's name, so I searched for her on Facebook and found my sister.
She is the spitting image of our father so I knew immediately it was true. Both my sister and her mom confirmed it, and my sister and I immediately started bonding. We are incredibly close now.
My father's side was overjoyed when I found her, as they knew of her but never what happened to her. We've all welcomed her with open arms, except my father. When she reached out to him, he essentially told her to get lost, then screamed at me that she wasn't my sister, and to this day calls me the "jerk that ruined the family".
My sister and I did a 23 And Me test and we matched as half-siblings, so now there's no denying it.
I lost a terrible father but gained an incredible sibling who means 10 times more to me.
43. It’s Just A Piece Of Paper Anyway
My wife and I aren't officially married. No one knows.
We had a ceremony and everything, a reception...the whole nine yards.
We just never did the official paperwork.
We realized that since she's going back to school, it benefits her financially to go through financial aid as "single" rather than "married".
When she finishes up, we're going to head over to the town hall and finish the last step.
44. Kids Are Clever
My uncle owned an old Camaro that collected dust in his garage. When I was around 10, my family and I were in town visiting and I wrote a naughty word in the dust on the hood of the car. I used my thumb so that the letters were fatter than my normal index finger.
A few hours later my aunt/uncle asked us who did it and I “proved” it wasn’t me by showing how the person who did it had bigger fingers than me. Taking that little story to my grave!
Zapylaiev Kostiantyn, Shutterstock
45. Sibling Shenanigans
My little brother was in the shower, I could hear him singing. I put a coat on backward, and a stocking cap pulled over my face, and waited outside the bathroom door.
He opened the door (still singing, and dancing kinda), and I did the Frankenstein thing. Arms out, moaning “uhhhh”. But it turned into a total disaster. My brother screamed and fell backward, knocking the toilet completely over. Water went everywhere, the top of the toilet tank broke, the shower curtain ripped down, and he lay on the floor in the middle of all this.
I ran back down the hall, took the coat and hat off, and sauntered back casually. By then my mother and father and our sisters were there, and everyone was like, you know, what the heck. I’ve heard him tell this story as proof of the existence of ghosts. To this day (little feller is now a 52-year-old bank manager with two kids) he believes in ghosts. I don’t feel a bit bad.
46. Just Grin And Bear It
My son will never know how much I can't stand his idiot friend from next door. The kid is legitimately stupid, and so confident which makes it worse.
Let me elaborate. He's not a bad kid. He's not malicious or a troublemaker or anything. He just has zero common sense or ability to do the simplest tasks, he constantly talks, and when he does it's either about absolutely nothing or it's just a bunch of wrong info, and he never leaves me alone unless I'm a bit terse and short with him.
My kid is a few years younger than him and has more sense. I feel like I can leave my kid alone in the house for 30 minutes if I absolutely had to. I feel like if I left this kid alone for just 10 minutes he'd break something due to pure idiocy.
PeopleImages.com - Yuri A, Shutterstock
47. A Close Call
One night as a kid I heard my parents having an explosive argument in their bedroom which suddenly went quiet. I found out during a phone call from my mother it was because she attempted to shoot my father in the face with a .303 but it didn’t go off when she pulled the trigger as there were no bullets. They were both horrified and just stared at each other apparently.
They’re still together.
48. Throw Out The Whole Thing, Including The Uncle
While my cousin was walking around with her son in the woods, she came across a hunting stand. She climbed it, and found a pair of binoculars. Sitting straight forward, and lifting the binoculars to her eyes…what she saw sent a chill down her spine. She was staring at her own bedroom window.
Let's be logical here: If it was a legit hunting stand, it wouldn't be facing a house. This was for a Peeping Tom. When my brother and I visited not long after, she showed us where it was. We tore it down and literally wrapped it around a couple trees. Bent it to complete uselessness.
I got an angry call the next day:
"DID YOU TEAR DOWN A HUNTING STAND YESTERDAY"?
"Yeah I did"".
That was your uncle's"!
It turned out, my cousin reported it to the family and they ignored the issue. When the uncle was asked, he said there was just an old tree house out there. Even when he was exposed, they didn't really care. They were more upset about the damage we did.
Suffice it to say I have written off most of that side of the family.
49. Short And Not Sweet
My former wife (now ex) and I were having problems. I was certain she was cheating on me. The truth was so much worse. I found her notes...where she was figuring out how much she would make if I had an "accident" and didn't survive.
50. The Bad Aunt
As my grandmother took her last breath, my mother, sister, brother, aunt, and I were with her. She was an amazing woman. It was a terribly sad event to lose her.
My aunt began putting lotion on her hands. At the time I don't think any of us thought much of it. I think I recall thinking, "that's sweet". It was a little strange but I just thought she was doing it because my grandma's hands may have looked dry and it was maybe the last time she'd ever be able to do something like that for her.
My sister suddenly yelled out in a very angry, aggressive tone. And we all kinda stepped back like, "Whoa, what just happened, what's going on here"? We were all puzzled looking at my sister like, what was that about? Then the dark truth came out: "She just slipped her rings off her fingers"!
That was a bad day. My aunt then rushed the sale on the house even though my mom didn't want to sell it at all. My family has been fractured ever since that day.
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