Some people think they can walk all over whoever they want. The sad thing is, a lot of the time, they're right. But not always. Sometimes, a total jerk will decide to mess with the exact wrong person. That's when they finally get what they deserve—and when it happens, it is so, so satisfying.
1. First-Class Pain In The Butt
We were on a flight from Miami to Bolivia as a family of five with three kids under 12. We’re getting on the flight, sitting down, when this entitled woman and her husband come up to my row. I’m sitting in the same row as my brother and sister. They say: “Excuse us, you’re in our seats”. All three of us have all been well versed in child travel by this time so we pull out our individual boarding passes and show her that we’re also assigned these seats.
They insist that we’re wrong and demand to see the passes. We don’t give them over. My dad comes over to see why strangers are talking to his children: “Excuse me, why are you talking to my kids”? “They’re in our seats, look”. My dad says: “That’s their assigned seat, they know how to read a boarding pass”. By this time, we have attracted the attention of the flight attendant.
She confirms that indeed, those seats had been double-booked. The couple are irate, demanding their assigned seats. The flight attendant leaves to go “see what I can do for you”. This whole time, the woman is making a big show of trying to store her bag in front of ours in the overhead bins and complaining loudly. The attendant returns and says: “Thank you so much for your patience. It was double booked, but it looks like we have enough seats in first-class available for your party. If you could please follow me”?
They sigh, relieved that finally SOMEONE will see reason. Well, the joke was on them. The flight attendant holds up her hand. “No sir, not you. If you three (looking at me and my siblings) will please join us up in first class, we’ll make sure you’re taken care of”. The lemon-sucking look on the woman’s face as we politely grabbed our bags and moved to the coziest laps of luxury our young selves had the fortune of lucking out on was unforgettable.
I remember the meal making me have a headache, but the reclining seats, warm blankets, and sleep masks sure helped with all that suffering.
2. Out Of The Flowerbed And Into The Fire
Because the groundhog had no shadow, spring came early, so I had decided to work on the garden strip that borders mine and Debra's property. There's a fence between the garden and her house. While doing so, I get rid of some of MY daylilies that are on MY property. I finish, return to my house and continue my day, until I hear a shriek from the side of my house.
I rush over, because I'm scared someone got hurt, and Debra, who just got home from work, asks me why I got rid of HER lilies. I say that they were MY lilies, and that I was making space for tomatoes, cucumbers, and carrots. She then calls 9-1-1 because I had destroyed HER property. The authorities come and basically tell her to go inside and shut up, because it's pretty clear who's flowers they were.
But it didn’t end there. The next day she had a few too many. This put her anger over the edge about the loss of my lilies. She went, with wood and a firestarter, to my neighbor’s house on the opposite side. She then lit their bins on fire. This then spread to their porch, and before long their entire house was on fire.
I'm a light sleeper, and living in a cul-de-sac, was woken up by the orange haze floating through my windows. I called 9-1-1, the whole shebang, witness report and everything. I walked out of the house, with 9-1-1 still on the phone—and I couldn’t believe what happened next. The deranged neighbor fully confesses, all while they’re in earshot.
After a while and as the fire department shows up, she realizes her mistakes. One: she lit a house on fire, and two: she lit the wrong house on fire. She's being charged with arson and the like, and everyone got out. There’s a mother, father, and two kids who are high schoolers. It still feels surreal.
3. A Family Affair
I am a combat veteran and a school teacher at the time of this story, and my wife was a school teacher as well. So, I bought my first house 12 years ago. It was in a low-middle-class neighborhood with a lot of working-class families. My house had a pool in the backyard and my parents bought me and my wife a hot tub as a wedding/housewarming gift.
Two weeks after moving in, we came home to an unsettling sight. We found a stranger and six teenage kids swimming in our pool when we got home. We will call them Entitled Mom, the Entitled Daughter, the Entitled Son, and the others I assume to be their friends and/or boyfriend. The daughter was about 18 or 19 years old and her brother was about 17.
When we told them to get out and get off our property, the mother told me that the previous owner gave them permission to come over whenever they wanted to swim. I explained to her that I was the new owner and that I was not ok with it. I told her that not only do I not know them, but there is a liability for me if they got hurt. I couldn’t believe her response.
She yelled and faked cried, saying I was being a bad neighbor, selfish, and forcing her kids to sweat in the summer heat. She told me that if they got heatstroke, it was my fault for not letting them swim in my pool. I told her to get the heck off my property and never return. Fast forward two weeks. I had put up a "No Trespassing" sign on my property in multiple spots and had gotten to know many of the not-entitled neighbors.
They were great and told me to ignore the mom and her kids. They told us she was already badmouthing us, but no one ever believed her. This is when it took a strange turn. Now I start to notice when I wake up in the morning that there is evidence of people using my pool and hot tub at night when we are asleep or away. Like, I find cans and other stuff.
I figure it has to be the mother and/or her brats. So I install cameras on the grounds and start video-taping. Sure enough, I catch the daughter and a few others hanging out in my pool on Friday nights when my wife and I are out. I figure they must have been waiting for us to leave and then threw a mini-party or were quietly swimming while we slept.
So I discussed it with my wife. We decided to teach the mother and her brats a lesson. So the next Friday night, I park my car a street over and my wife does the same. We wait in the dark house to see if any of them come over. The daughter and I assume her boyfriend, the son and I assume his girlfriend, and four other teen couples come right over and start getting in my pool and hot tub.
I wait 45 minutes for them to get really into their fun. And let me tell you, it was getting hot and heavy out there; they were all undressed. I then spring my trap. I go out with my piece, pointed at the ground but at the ready. When I reach the pool, my wife flips on the backlights and I yell for them to freeze or I'll shoot. Meanwhile, my wife calls the authorities.
They all have the deer in the headlights look on their faces and not one of them tries to speak for a good minute. The daughter then starts to tell us that she has permission to be there and that we need to let them get dressed. I tell them that if they move towards me or their property, that I would consider them to be charging me or reaching for a weapon and I'd shoot.
They must have believed me because they froze. One girl begged me to give her her clothing. Not being rude, I say that I will throw them all their clothing. But there was a twist. I then walk over to their piles of clothing, phones, and purses and throw EVERYTHING into the pool. They freak out trying to save their phones and other goods.
After ten minutes officers show up and they have the kids climb out of the pool wearing their soaked clothes and trying to shake their phones dry. I show the officers the videos from our cameras, the No Trespassing signs, and explain to them that I had told them and their mother they were persona non grata. The kids were detained for trespassing and a bunch of other charges.
The officers recommended that next time, I leave my piece in the safe and let them just come and get them. I told them that I thought they may attack my wife and had to "stand my ground." I proved that I never pointed it at them with the videos, so I couldn't be charged with anything. Then came the very best part. As the kids are being loaded into the cruisers, the mother shows up yelling at the officer, my wife, and me.
She demands they let them go and even tries to open the door on one of the cruisers. The officers threaten her with being detained if she doesn't back off and leave my wife and me alone. I later found out that the charges against the teens were reduced and they all got plea deals. They all got community service, fines, and were put on probation. We got a restraining order against the mother and her brats so they couldn't bother us again.
I then sent a bill to the mother for the cost of draining, disinfecting, and refilling my pool and having a professional cleaning service clean up the kids’ mess. The bill was for about $400. I had my parents’ attorney send it to her with a letter stating that if it was not paid in 30 days, then we would sue her for a larger amount. She sent a check to my attorney and thankfully it did not bounce.
About a year later, the entire entitled family moved away and we never heard from them again.
4. Leave It Well Enough Alone
For the past few months, I've suspected that my upstairs neighbor has been taking some of my mail. I buy a lot of things online like books and craft supplies and every now and then there's been small things that were meant to arrive on a certain day that never did. One day, I caught her wandering around my front door. When I asked her what she was doing she said "Oh, I was looking for something I think I dropped into your yard”.
I got surveillance cameras installed a while ago, which were not noticeable to my neighbors. The camera that's pointed at my front door isn't visible from the driveway. So here comes the trap. I purchased a few postage boxes to set up for her. The first one was a glitter trap. I set up the box to make sure she would get glitter to the face as soon as she opened it.
I packed it to make it look like a postage parcel, then sat it at my front door. 20 minutes later I saw her walking to my front door. She looked around then picked up the box and walked away. My only regret is that I didn't get to see her reaction when she got a face full of glitter. I haven't noticed any other mail going missing after that, but she will regret it if she does it again.
5. Play Stupid Games, Win Stupid Prizes
When I was a kid I never cut my hair, no matter what I never cut my hair, so I had very long blonde hair. And as a kid, a lot of people would ask to touch it. And I was fine with it, as long as they had my permission. So when I was six, my mom took me to a grocery store to buy some things for dinner that night. We got to the store and my mom got the stuff she needed, but was missing the bread from the other side of the store.
She sent me to go get it since I was fast and small. When I got to the bread, I picked out the brand we would usually buy, and at the time I really liked baguettes and other types of bread. So when I saw the baguettes, I totally forgot that my mom was waiting for me and grabbed a loaf(?) and headed back to my mom. When I was heading back to my mom from the bread aisle, I felt someone pull on my hair. Not gently, no, they yanked it.
They pulled so hard I thought my hair what going to come out. And I cried so hard my mom heard me across the store. I turned around in shock. It turns out it was a kid about my age who wanted to touch my hair, so his MOM, and I say his 40-YEAR-OLD MOTHER, pulled my hair so her friggin' kid could touch it. My mom rushed over and told the lady to let go of me.
The conversation then went like this: “Let my daughter go”! “My child just wanted to touch her hair, she has very pretty hair”. Me: “She pulled on my hair, it hurts”! My mom: “You could've just asked! You can’t just pull a kid's hair, I can call 9-1-1 for assault”! Her: “You are harassing me, all I did was let my son touch her hair! I can call the authorities on you for harassing me and my child”!
My mom: “Firstly, I am not harassing you, you grabbed my child. And secondly, you can call the authorities. You will only be making things worse for yourself”. She was absolutely right. As it turns out, the entitled mom DID call the authorities and they took both our statements. The entitled mother had given an over-exaggerated and dramatic report, telling the officers, as we would find out later, that I had given consent for her kid to touch my hair and my mom had come out of nowhere and started harassing the entitled mother.
My mother had given the officers the actual report from her side. I had been asked to give a report, but I was too scared and tired from the experience to say much. They checked the security footage and saw what actually happened. In the end, she got what was coming to her. My mom decided to press charges and sued the entitled mom for assault.
She was sent away for six months and fined for providing a false report as the cherry on top!
6. A Restraining Order In The Making
I'm currently eight months pregnant with my first child. I work as a secretary on the inpatient ward of a hospital, second shift. I started working here when I was 19 to support myself through college. So, my coworkers are like family. When I was four months pregnant, I told my coworkers, who were happy for me. All except Patty. She didn't say anything.
After a while, she started being friendly with me asking about the baby, my health, and my plans for the future. I told her that my boyfriend and I were getting married and moving in together to be a family. Patty didn't like this for some reason, and started asking me about my opinions on adoption. I said NO, I'd never give my child up for adoption
For a few weeks, Patty gave me the silent treatment. Then one night, after visiting hours, a couple in their 40s showed up. told them that visiting hours were over and that they could see their family member tomorrow. What the woman told me made my blood run cold. She said, “Oh, we're here to see YOU! We're so excited to meet you and want to thank you for choosing us to give your baby to”!
I was dumbfounded and shocked—until the woman tried to touch my six months pregnant belly. I screamed so loud all of the nurses came running. The couple tried to explain to security, nurses, and me, that their sister-in-law told them that I was a young unwed mother desperately trying to give up my baby for adoption and choose them.
She said that their sister-in-law promised them my baby, since they have been suffering from infertility for years. I told them that I had no intentions of giving up my baby and to never come near me again. I also told them that I don't even know their sister-in-law, but they kept insisting that I did. The next night Patty comes charging up to my desk, screaming at me.
She’s yelling and asking how could I treat her brother and sister-in-law like garbage, after she helped me with my "mistake". I called security and Patty, her brother and sister-in-law are banned from coming near me or contacting me at work.
7. All This Over A Parking Space
I am a paramedic in a place that has some HOAs and apartment complexes. We hate responding to the apartment complexes because there is nothing but assigned parking and no-fire zones. Basically, if we can't find a space to fit in we have to block the road. My agency also uses first responder vehicles and ambulances. The first responder, as implied, usually arrives first so we do our best to leave room for the ambulance to fit in.
We get a call at the apartment complex. I am the first responder. As I pull up to the address by some miracle, there is a spot only two apartments away. Great, I can leave the road clear for the ambulance. As soon as I park, out comes this guy screaming I can't park there. I do the "are you serious” look and just say it’s a medical emergency.
He says he doesn't care, I can't park there. Keep in mind my vehicle has enough lights to make a Christmas tree jealous. I just grab my stuff, lock the vehicle, and keep going. He is screaming he is going to call the authorities, I tell him they are already on the way. They respond to medical emergencies. An officer gets there while I am in with the patient and tells him basically to pound salt.
The officer enters the apartment—and then this guy really goes full-blown hissy fit. He enters the apartment and comes into the room where I am treating the patient. He starts ranting and raving about how I have to move my vehicle. I look at the officer and say "get him outta here”. The officer then seals his fate. He asks the patient if she wants this person removed from the apartment and did she ever give consent for him to enter.
The patient's response: "Get him OUT, he's trespassing”. Boom, the all-clear. The cop gives him one last chance and tells him to leave or he will be detained. He doubles down, yelling: "I AM ON THE HOA BOARD, I CAN GO WHERE I PLEASE”. At this point, backup is called. The officer at least manhandles the guy out of the room. The ambulance arrives with PD backup and they get him out of the apartment so we can safely remove the patient.
Not entirely sure what happened next, as I was in the back of the ambulance, but when I got out one of the officers approached and said, "Sorry but we need another bus. We had to taze him". Policy for PD is if they taze someone, they have to be transported to the hospital by ambulance to the hospital, as the taser spikes have to be surgically removed due to the barbs on them.
They wait for the second ambulance and take him. I go back in service. I found out a few weeks later that he was charged with trespassing, assaulting an officer, resisting arrest, interference with government administration (AKA interfering with the scene of an emergency). All over a parking space that I would have been in for all of 20 minutes if he hadn't created problems.
I can only assume he took a plea deal, as I was never called to testify.
8. Insane Behavior
My wife needed a few things from the grocery store and on this particular day I happened to be available and I offered to go for her. She works hard and does a lot, so I definitely felt it was necessary to do something for her so she could just relax for the day. I took my stepson with me so she could rest up and just take it easy. I thought it would give me time to spend with him for some bonding—but instead, we both got an afternoon we’ll never forget.
We completed all of the errands, which went smoothly, and then headed to the grocery store to finish up our day. My son, being a typical four-year-old, was full of energy running ahead of me laughing and speaking to everyone he comes across, which I generally don’t mind as long as he doesn’t hit anyone and stays within eye view. As I’m making my way down an aisle looking for canned corn, my son jogs to the end of it when an older lady is entering at the other end.
My son, being the sweet social butterfly he is, approached and exclaims an excited “Hi! Me four and me Ryan”! Bless his little heart. The lady looked down and says “Well hello there. You shouldn’t be running around unattended, let’s go find your parents”. I didn’t think anything of her statement because I assumed she just hadn’t seen me.
“Ryan! Come back here bud, please”! He excitedly runs back toward me and starts turning in circles because you know, he’s four lol. I’m still searching the shelves as the lady walks past me and stops behind me. Again I think nothing of it because it’s a grocery store and you have to share the aisles. I turn my basket around and start to walk toward the front cash registers when this lady literally blocks my path.
I say excuse me and try to walk around her and she moves her cart in front of me again. I honestly thought she was just getting confused and said excuse me once again and tried one more time to go around and she just blocks my path. The following conversation ensues. Me: “Um, sorry about that, we’ll get out of your way”. Lady: “Oh, I don’t think so! You’re not going anywhere with that child”!
Me: “You mean my son”? Lady: “That’s not your child! He’s white! And you’re Mexican. You probably didn’t even know his name until he said it to me”! Me: “Sure, whatever lady, can you just move? My wife is at home and anxiously awaiting for us”. Then, she upped the ante. She said: “Stop your lies. You’re not taking him anywhere, you pervert”!
This whole time my son is standing close to me holding my leg because he was honestly getting scared. I was getting angry because I hadn’t had much sleep and I have a short fuse anyway. Me: “As you can see he’s standing close to me because he trusts me and you’re scaring him so how about you buzz off”? Lady: “No! He’s scared because of you! He just doesn’t know how to express it yet”.
She looks at my son. Lady: “Come on now sweetie, I’m here to rescue you. Come with me”. Thankfully my son was able to communicate to her he wasn’t going anywhere with her. But she was having NONE of it. I still get mad when I think of what she did next. She literally grabbed my son and began to run. It caught me off guard because I honestly could not fathom what was actually happening.
My son starts screaming loudly because he was so scared and this lady is just like “Don’t worry sweetie he won’t hurt you I promise”! Suddenly I snap back into reality and I begin to chase after this crazy witch. While running through the store, I yell for people to stop her and that she’s kidnapping my son and thankfully a worker stops her before she makes the exit.
Lady: “Why are you stopping me? This Mexican here is trying to take my grandson”! My son literally is bawling his eyes out and extending his arms out calling for me. This lady was relentless and would not let go until my son even after he slapped her face multiple times. I laughed a little, not gonna lie. At this point, a manager shows up and asks what’s going on.
The lady spoke before me, saying: “This (pointing at me) pervert is kidnapping my grandson and I was just trying to escape”! I said: “That’s my son you freaking psycho. Now let him go”. The manager didn’t know what to believe. I don’t blame him, he was caught in a weird situation. So I pulled out my phone and showed him pictures of me and my son that dated a year or so back as proof. Her response was infuriating.
This lady still would not give up and accused me of faking them. Like how would you do that exactly? I’ll never know, but whatever. Sadly, there were two other ladies there taking the psycho’s side and said I was attempting to take my own son because there was no way we were family because of our different skin tones. One even called the authorities, which I was actually happy about because I knew they’d be able to review the security cameras.
Even still, I called my wife to see if she could come to the store to get this situation cleared up quicker. As soon I told her what was going on, she zoomed to the store. She got there about the same time as the officers. The crazy ladies were giving their statement to the officers when my wife walked in. As soon as she walked in, my son goes “Mama help”! My wife is a true mama bear and she immediately flew into a rage when she saw this lady holding my son.
She yelled: “Let him go NOW”! The lady said, “Sorry sweetie, I was just trying to protect him from this pervert over here”. Another one piped up, “Yeah we saw him kidnapping him but this lady saved him”! The cop looks at the lady and is confused. He asks: “I thought this was your grandson”? My wife said: “I have no idea who that lady is”.
She takes out her phone and shows the officer a picture of my mother-in-law. Finally, the lady fesses up. “Okay, I’m sorry he’s not my grandson but I was only trying to protect him from this dirty pervert over here”! The other lady said, “Yeah I witnessed the whole thing, he snatched that child and tried to run away with him but this lady stopped it”!
As if that wasn’t bad enough, there was another one. She said: “Yes I saw it too. He needs to be taken away. And you (pointing to my wife) should be thankful that this lady was here to save your son because you obviously just let him loose wherever”! My wife says: “Who are you talking about again”? All three crazy ladies pointed at me. My wife replies: “Oh you mean my husband”?!
The ladies were shocked. They said “Husband?!”?! My wife said, “Yeah who do you think called me and got me here so fast”?! I presented my ID to the officer and the manager and my wife did the same. We also each showed pictures of us on our phones to prove we were really a family. The cop nodded in approval and handed us our phones back and jotted down a few notes.
The three ladies for some reason still kept trying to say this was all fake and my wife was in on the kidnapping and said we needed to be detained. My wife lost it at this point and let off some colorful words I won’t repeat here but she definitely got her point across. Then the nail in the coffin came for the psycho trio. The office turned to the manager and asks: “Sir, do the cameras work here”? The manager says yes, and the officer asks to review them.
The three ladies' faces went pale. Like ghostly pale. The officer reviewed the outside camera as I pulled into the parking lot and saw me take my son out of my car and then as I went up and down the aisles and most importantly the instance the woman snatched up my son and began to run. Upon his return, he asks “Would you like to press charges”? The lady pipes up: “Yes I would”!
The officer’s reaction was brutal. He looked at her and said: “Why would I be asking you that question? Shut your mouth and sit down”. He turns to me and repeats the question. I said absolutely. Lady one was charged with attempted kidnapping, false imprisonment, providing a false report, and child endangerment. The other two were also charged with providing a false report as well.
To make matters worse for the first lady, my son bruises easily and she left some terrible spots on him from where she was grasping him—but he’s fine! This added a charge of child endagerment to her rap sheet. The officer will be following up with me in a few weeks.
9. Good Godiva, Man
My wife used to keep these little Godiva chocolates that she likes in her desk at work, but started noticing some of them missing and figured it must be someone from the overnight cleaning staff taking them. Fed up with losing her not-inexpensive treats, she decided to get revenge on the choco-thief in question.
My wife replaced the good chocolate with these little squares of chocolate laxatives that look just like real candies. The next morning, she saw several of the laxatives were gone. Mission accomplished. From that day forward, she was never missing another one of her good chocolates ever again. I imagine the toilet trouble was a lesson learned.
10. Should’ve Laid Off The Bottle(s)
One day last week when I came home from work, I noticed my shed door was open and the padlock that I used to keep it shut was broken. And I had a LOT of bags full of soda cans in there. Me and my friends tend to drink a lot of soda, so I've built up a lot of cans over the course of about a year. And I was going to cash them in at the bottle drop soon, because I like big payouts. It's ten cents a can where I live after all.
But there was more than just my bags of cans missing from the shed too. They took my gardening shears, a steel rake, two shovels, a full two gallon gas can, a cheap power drill I got for like $5 used, an electric hedge trimmer, and a small electric chainsaw that was also used, and a machete. They didn't touch the lawn mower, weed whacker, extension cords, or the old radio I had in there.
No idea why they took what they did, but I guess they figured they could resell them or something. I checked my camera footage to see if I caught anything—and I made a disturbing discovery. There was my three nephews (ages 16, 15, and 14) breaking into my shed with one of their dad's large claw hammers. I recognized the hammer because it's bright yellow and black, and their dad has a bunch of them.
It only took them a few hits to smash that cheap lock. After they first broke into my shed, they took what they could by hand. And then they came back with some shopping. It took them a few trips to get all of the cans. And they didn't bother to even try and close the door when they were done. My sister and brother-in-law first denied their kids took anything from me.
So I went to their house and showed them the security footage from my cameras. I never told them I'd had cameras installed—and there’s a sad reason why. This wasn’t the first time my nephews robbed me. It started with food & snacks. And then moved on to DVDs and video games. Then pretty much anything they thought they could smuggle out after that.
Any time I made them return stuff they'd stolen from me, I was treated like the bad guy and then got the fakest apologies I've ever heard. And they never got in much trouble from their parents either. The final straw happened last year when my nephews broke into my house and took three six-packs of my favorite blood orange ale from my fridge.
But that’s not the worst part. They used my hidden spare key to get in, and also took a huge dump in one of my bathrooms and not only didn't flush, but also peed all over the floor. And I'm pretty sure it was intentional. The drinks they took were hidden in one of their bedrooms when I confronted my sister and brother-in-law about my nephews stealing it.
I was basically given an equivalent excuse to "Boys will be boys" when I wanted them punished. So I had the cameras put in and told no one. Which was a smart move. When my sister and brother-in-law saw the camera footage of my nephews stealing from me, they seemed furious. But they were actually madder that their boys skipped school to rob me.
They'd spent all day making repeated trips to the Bottle Drop and cashing the cans by machine. The bottle drop also pays by machine. So they just kept bringing the cans in till they cashed them all. And then they bought video games and junk food with the money. Said money actually amounted to nearly $200. With that and the destroyed padlock, I told my sister and brother-in-law that they now owed me $200.
My sister and brother-in-law went from being angry at their kids to making excuses for them, and then being angry at me for wanting that money back when I know they have three kids and a mortgage. I said it was either that or I go to the authorities and press charges. They told me to get out, and I said they have two days to decide how to pay me back before I go to the authorities.
I got back everything else my nephews took, machete and gas can included. Though they'd already used the gas for something. But over the next couple of days, my sister and brother-in-law were blowing up my phone with a ton of messages. Both verbal and text. At first they were calling me heartless because it was right after the holidays and they have three kids and a mortgage.
Then they started gaslighting me—and even threatening me. And all of this would go in a repeating cycle. My nephews chimed in from another cell phone and were sending me lots of messages of their own. Which were more fake apologies and gaslighting. My eldest nephew even sent me a picture of himself holding a soda can and giving me the middle finger.
So I guess they weren't taking my threats of going to the authorities seriously because "FAAAAMILY”!. When I last spoke with my sister and brother-in-law, they refused to negotiate any sort of method of repayment for what my nephews did. Even when I suggested they just sell the video games that were purchased with the money from the cans.
Then they had the audacity to say I'd actually tempted my nephews by having the cans in my shed to begin with. Oh yes. I'm the devil snake that tempted my nephews with a shed full of cans that just screamed "MONEY MONEY MONEY”! So that was it. I went to the station that morning and filed the report. Gave them a copy of the video footage of my nephews stealing from my shed.
I gave them the broken lock they smashed. Showed them all of the texts, which were screen-capped and also given as evidence. Heck, I even gave them a copy of the photo my eldest nephew sent me of him flipping me off. I did tell officers that I found it worrisome that my nephews had taken the machete. But they classified it as a tool. Especially since they took a lot of other actual tools. So fair enough on that, I suppose.
But my nephews were indeed caught and detained on Saturday. Officers came to their house and my sister and brother-in-law were forced to let them in because they had a warrant. Apparently, all three of my nephews went from being cocky little dweebs to crying like babies when they were being put in cuffs. I know this because a neighbor I'm acquainted with that's sort of friends with my sister was there to see it.
It didn’t end there, though. Shortly after the arrest my sister and brother-in-law were blowing up my phone again. They weren't able to get their kids out till Monday morning. And now the boys are being charged with larceny, willful destruction of property/vandalism, and harassment. The authorities took this whole case pretty seriously as there have been complaints about my nephews for some time—but nothing was proven until now.
The past few months, bags of cans have actually been going missing all over the area. Don't know if it was my nephews or not. But they're likely suspects. And with word spreading of their arrest, let's hope other neighbors with security cameras come forward with more footage. My sister and brother-in-law showed up at my house too. I refused to open the door and told them that this all happened because they are enablers who refuse to hold their kids accountable for their actions.
That made them just scream and pound on my door more till I threatened to call 9-1-1 on them too. And since I've done it already, they know I mean it now. So they left without any more trouble. But they went back to blowing up my phone. I didn't block my sister or her husband. Instead I decided to just save all of the messages they send me because I've made the decision to take them to small claims court over this.
I don't really need or want the money, and have already replaced the destroyed padlock with a much better one. However, the kids aren't the only ones who need to be taught a lesson. In the end, I hope I put them in enough of a hole that they learn not to screw with me ever again. I also have the full support of my family on this. My parents, aunts, uncles, cousins, etc.
They're all supporting me in this because my nephews have stolen from them too. And after banning my nephews from my house, some of them did the same.
11. Don’t Try Me
I live in a town center above a shop with two lovely neighbors. I'm lucky enough to have off-street parking. Over the past few months, someone who lives in a neighboring block of flats has taken it upon himself to park in our spaces. Basically, he moved into a rental property knowing it had no parking and recently dropped $12k on a flashy car.
Yes, we've told him he can't park there but as three single women (46, 60, and 83 respectively) he has used being a large male to try to intimidate my two older neighbors. He won't directly speak to me but does leave aggressive notes on my car. But I still had no idea what he was really planning. A couple of weeks ago, I had a call from the authorities.
They were requesting me to go to my local station for an interview pertaining to damage to his car. Off I trundle to the station, only to be confronted with CCTV and photographic evidence. Turns out, he installed a camera pointing at our property without our knowledge. Sucks to be him, though, because his camera gives a full view into my bedroom and my neighbor’s bathroom—strike one for him.
It did show that I walked past his car with a wheelie bin, apparently scratching his car. They showed me photos of damage to his car. There was just one thing. I pointed out that these were on the opposite side to where I passed. No evidence of damage I supposedly did. I had photos of his undamaged car—strike two for him. In his statement, he said he had it in writing from the owner that he could park there, but couldn't produce the letter.
I had an email from the owner saying he had no permission—strike three for him. I went to the station with the expectation that I would end up with a conviction. I left the station with him having a formal warning for misuse of CCTV and giving a false statement. Couldn't have gone better for me and now he has to find somewhere else to park.
12. Good Riddance
I live in a 20-unit complex, but only half of us have assigned parking spaces, me being one of the lucky ones. My car space is right next to my front door and there is a sign that clearly states that the car space is allocated to my unit number. But this doesn't stop some of my neighbors or their guests from parking there. That was ok enough to live with, but then it got bad fast.
A new person had only recently moved in when he started parking in my spot, usually for most of the day and occasionally overnight. I confronted him and asked him to not park there, as he didn't have assigned parking and was required to park on the street. When this request was ignored, I went to the landlord who then sent him a letter.
When this too was ignored, I thought of a petty revenge plan. He would park there around the same time in the afternoon and when he would leave his car there overnight he would leave around noon the next day. He was entitled but predictable. When I was a kid, I read books about practical jokes like putting double-sided tape on the toilet seat or baby powder inside a powdered donut.
This book brought me hours of joy by pranking my friends and my well-deserved entitled mother. While thinking of my plan, one of those jokes came to mind. So I went shopping to find what I needed. A roll of industrial-strength double-sided tape and a huge roll of bubble wrap with the really big bubbles. Now all I had to do was wait until he left his car parked in my spot overnight.
It didn't take long. I asked another neighbor if he'd like to be my partner, and as soon as I told her what I was planning, she was all in. There are lights outside the unit complex at night, so we could see what we were doing. Even so, they aren't bright enough to expose us. Perfect. In the cover of moonlight, we put double-sided tape all over the back tires of his car. But we weren’t done.
We proceeded to stick the bubble wrap in multiple layers on the back of each wheel. We wedged even more bubble wrap between the back of the front wheels and the car so that when he reversed his car, there would be even more bubble wrap he'd be driving over. The back bumper of his car was hiding most of the bubble wrap so it was very unlikely that he would notice anything out of the ordinary.
I have surveillance cameras outside of my unit with a large monitor inside and one of the cameras points directly at the car park, so I had a direct view of his car. The next day I kept an eye out for him. Sure enough, around noon I saw him walking to his car. Brilliant! He started his car and as he reversed out of my car space, there was the loudest and most deafening banging sound I've ever heard.
The noise was so loud that I could hear it clear as day from inside my unit. His reaction was priceless. I heard him scream and saw him duck down, as if the sound was real. It took him a few minutes to get out of his car to investigate what made the noise. When he did, all I could hear was him shouting inaudible sentences with multiple swears thrown in for good measure.
The other neighbors came outside to see what was going on, as did I. ME: (faking concern) "OMG what happened?" NEIGHBOR: "Who the heck did this????!" ME: "I have no idea”. See, I'm in a wheelchair and couldn't possibly be capable of doing such a horrible thing. He spent the next few hours trying to get the bubble wrap off his tires.
Remember when I said the tape was industrial strength? I'd gone out of my way to find tape that would NOT come off easily. Eventually he got it off but for the next few days his car made that sound like when you get chewing gum stuck under your shoe. He never parked in my car space again.
13. When You Assume…You Know The Rest
Being someone that used to fly a lot, I constantly was upgraded to business class, first-class, or simply just upgraded seats using miles. Since the flight in question was a connection for me, I arrived and boarded later than most of the plane. As soon as I walked into the plane, I saw someone was sitting in my seat, since I had been upgraded.
Now, if you fly enough, someone sitting in your seat is not an uncommon occurrence. But this time, it was an encounter I’ll never forget. I said: “Excuse me, I believe you are in my seat”. The man in my seat does not even bother looking up at me, waves his hand dismissively at me, and says: “Let’s just switch seats so I can sit beside my wife”. I say, “Sure! What is your seat”?
He snickers and says a number. Now, I do not remember exactly what seat number he said, but it was the last row of the airplane. Aisle seat. Right by the bathroom. Yes, I have had to fly in those seats in the past. Remember, my assigned seat was in the first class/business class section. Now, I have switched seats with people innumerable times in my life without a second thought, even first-class seats—the look of someone getting to unexpectedly ride first class is priceless.
But the way this guy was behaving and what he was expecting—this was not one of those times. Me: “No. I am just going to sit in my assigned seat”. Now he finally looked at me. He says: “Well I want to sit by my wife so I am not moving”. I reply: “Well, if you want to sit by your wife, I am sure whoever is sitting way back there would be more than happy to switch seats way up here so you can sit back there with your wife”.
He didn’t like that at all, for what could he really say at that point without sounding so rude? He just stared at me. Now annoyed, I say: “Move”. He says: “I am not moving”. DING. Darn right, I pushed the call button. The flight attendant approaches: “Yes sir, how may I help”? I hand her my ticket and say that he is sitting in my seat.
She asks for his ticket, checks both tickets, sees his seat number, and gave him a look like, “Seriously”? She says: “Sir, you need to sit in your assigned seat”. He replies: “I want to sit beside my wife”. Well, I wasn’t missing a beat. I parroted my original statement about me being sure whoever was sitting back there beside him would be more than happy to switch seats and sit up here.
Boy oh boy, that obviously made him angry. The flight attendant looks at his wife and says “Ma’am, would you like to switch seats so you can sit by your husband”? His wife: “No”. The flight attendant continues in that all-too-familiar flight attendant voice that lets you know you have no choice: “Well sir, you have to sit in your assigned seat so please gather your things”.
What a sad and pathetic sight it was seeing this grown man act like a baby, gather his things and then sulk towards the back of the plane. Yes. His wife sat beside me that flight and didn’t join her husband in the back of the plane. No. We didn’t talk to or look at each other even once, which was perfectly fine with me. Imagine dismissively expecting someone to give up their first-class/business class seat to sit in the very last row of the airplane by the bathroom.
14. The Making Of A Legend
This goes back to nearly 45 years ago when I built my first house. The neighbor at the back was immediately angry that I bought two lots directly behind him and would not sell them to him or swap. His antics were beyond deranged. The dude would call the county inspectors and report my "violations" constantly. After we moved in the next spring, I began to regrade my property.
I also did things like plant grass and plant 20 trees, including six 5-feet blue spruce trees towards my property line, which I shared on the west with this neighbor. They were a good 10 feet in from the "agreed"-upon property line that HE was using. I spent two months doing all this, and one Saturday morning my neighbor and his wife were out and measuring their property and such.
I paid no notice until he knocked on my door and handed me what appeared to be a "bank survey" of his property that he had for 15 years. It indicated the location of property lines, his house and garage location, etc. He explained that my trees were on top of the "property line" and I need to move them. I kind of agreed with what he said based on his site survey and I proceeded to move them.
Then I looked closely at the survey. What I saw made me gasp. It also indicated the location of an abandoned alley we both had 1/2 possession of with dimensions off his garage. This clearly indicated not only was he claiming ALL of the alley, but a 20-foot strip along the entire back of my yard. Matter of fact, ALL the neighbors were claiming this and did so for years.
My house was the first one built on my side of the block. What makes this interesting? My neighbor had a huge strawberry bed (over 10 years old) along almost the entire backyard ON MY property. 500+ plants, all prime producers and HIS PRIDE AND JOY. I immediately got my own REAL survey done with steel pins driven and stamped hard copies of the site survey.
His bank survey was basically correct. But this was truly bad news for him. It meant that he and his neighbors really were freely stealing this strip of land across the entire block. 12 households in all. This is a small rural farming town (fewer than 800 people) and in all this dust up, I found out this neighbor is THE TOWN's big enormous tool.
So I took my survey over to this guy and said, listen, no rush to move your plants (this was July) but you need to get them off my property in the next few months. He tore up the survey and threw it at me. Now it was game on. I worked second shift and commuted 25 miles to work. My wife would go out into our garden, which was a huge one, when she got home at night and do some work in it.
About three or four days later, she is out there and the rear neighbors are disrespecting her for all the trouble "us new people" were causing. She told me the next morning and I went to those neighbors (who all refused to talk) and left them copies of the REAL survey in their doors. A couple of days later I am at work and my wife calls me pretty upset.
The bad neighbor along with two of his neighbors screamed at my wife when she was in the garden in such a bad way that she was driven to tears. I told her I will be home in 45 minutes. I called my brother-in-law (a farmer, less than mile out of town) and explained the situation. He told me he can have his John Deere tractor with his tiller at my house at 6 pm.
I next called the country sheriff’s office to request a deputy to be at my house at 5:30, and then I called the chief and requested the same. I get home and minutes later, both officers show up. I handed them my survey and walked them to show them the steel pins. I asked them what property are the strawberry plants on? They say clearly on my property.
Then I asked them, it’s my property and I can do whatever, right? They said sure. Now, we have about 20 people mulling around, though not my bad neighbor who ran inside the house. He was not going to face me after how he spoke to my wife. Instead, he sent his wife to the door to order me off his property or he will call the authorities. I said, too late, I already did and you have 15 minutes to relocate as many of your plants as you can.
It was almost exactly 15 minutes later when my brother-in-law showed up, and now it’s getting fun. I showed my brother-in-law where to start tilling. Took him 30 minutes to completely grind up all the strawberry plants. The silence was awesome. The rear neighbors were shocked and I became a legend.
15. Laser Sharp Revenge
Once at a laser tag birthday party, there was a 12-13-year-old little twerp following people around and beaming them over and over. Every time the vest and lasergun would come back on, he'd go to town and shoot you multiple times. He'd follow the same players everywhere. He kept doing it to one of my friends and me, and even did it to my friend’s little brother despite multiple warnings.
After the second time telling him to stop, I checked him to the ground…and ripped a huge one right on his head. It was perfectly timed—but it got even better. He cried and told his parents I had been mean to him, but I just told him he was following us around and then tripped and fell. They bought it and apologized for their child. Awesome.
16. Turns Out Indentured Servitude Is Not OK
My wife and I had just immigrated back to the US and needed jobs and a place to stay. We thought we'd struck gold when a fabulously wealthy woman hired me as a groundskeeper and maintenance guy and my wife as a cook and maid for her elderly parents. The pay was low, but part of it involved being able to live rent-free in the second house on the estate.
The elderly couple was extremely senile, but still the sweetest old folks you can imagine, it was a really nice property so for a few months, everything was great. Then about three months in, my wife noticed the pantry—which was itself bigger than our living room—was not being re-stocked by the grocery delivery company that normally did these things.
We contacted our employer—and her reaction was bone-chilling. She flew into a rage that managing that sort of thing was our responsibility so she had canceled the delivery service without telling us. It became apparent that she fully expected us to notice and take care of it ourselves. When I asked her how she expected us to buy groceries for her parents when she didn't even tell us she had canceled the service, she became extremely irate.
Direct quote: "Then what do I sign a check to each of you every week for?!" Yeah. This woman earnestly thought we should be using our personal paychecks, which were NOT very big, to pay for her parent's upkeep. After much deliberation, she begrudgingly left us a credit card to go out and buy groceries for her parents, which added to our workload at no extra pay, but we didn't have anywhere else to stay and no other job lined up so we just dealt with it.
Well, another few months go by and she contacts us again, she wants us to sign something. The paperwork shows up and it's requests for medical documentation from an insurance company. The chick wants us to attach our timesheets to it, sign it, and send it back to the insurance company. Well, I read it and it becomes apparent she has elder-care insurance to pay for live-in nursing services and has told them we are nurses so she can try to get them to pay our wages.
I contact her and inform her that we have not provided medical care, are not licensed to, and will not fill out the paperwork. Cue the mother of all tantrums. Woman goes nuts screaming into the phone about how much she has done for us and we owe her, how she will report that we are neglecting her parents, and then call immigration on us and have us “sent back to where we came from”.
I don't think she ever realized I am a citizen and my wife immigrated legally. I tell her that what she is asking us to do is against the law, and that I'd rather get fired than get caught. I tell her she has 90 days to find a replacement for us and we will be moving out. Things devolve into her screaming about how much money she has and how she is besties with the authorities and has a bunch of expensive lawyers to sue me with.
I suggest she asks one of those lawyers how they feel about defending her for insurance fraud and hang up. My wife and I continue our services for the old folks while looking for a new place, because they were actually super nice and the situation wasn't their fault. They were also VERY senile, mistaking us for other people they knew, forgetting they had kids, etc. etc., so they can't be held accountable for their daughter's behavior as they lack any ability to intervene.
Then, instead of a paycheck, I get a bill for the last eight months of rent and a note that she isn't paying our wages until we "pay her back for everything we owe her. Plus interest." She had valued the rent of the second house provided in our contract at more than she paid us monthly, so we'd never actually be able to pay it off. Yeah.
This woman actually tried to make us into indentured servants. So, without responding I continue performing my duties. I studiously kept logs on our hours, and retained all the "receipts" for how much more we owed her. 90 days go by without a paycheck. We purchased groceries using the card she provided, which she added to our "debts."
We document EVERYTHING. That’s when we really began to enact our plan. About a week before the 90 day, we contact two government agencies. First, the state department of labor to report exploitation, second, adult protective services to inform them that an elderly couple that requires caretaking are going to no longer have caretakers and that their daughter has refused to provide it.
Then we call her and inform her she is going to be receiving some phone calls from these agencies shortly and should probably contact her attorney. There was about a 60-second silence on the phone, then this deranged laughter, and she hung up. Okay...not the response I expected but whatever, one more week, and we're gone.
Eight hours later she shows up in the driveway in a rental car. This woman bought a one-way plane ticket to come out to the estate and report us to the authorities for trespassing on the property. This, of course, doesn't work because we have a tenancy contract and if she wants us gone she has to utilize the official eviction process.
She then tries to claim we are aliens, which a quick glance in our wallets at our IDs by the authorities proves false. She is starting to shriek at them about if they know who she is or how expensive her lawyers are. The officers look that unique combination of irritated and amused. They advise her not to talk to us or attempt to enter or go near the guest house.
She moves in to their house that night and presumably takes over our duties. I would go out on the balcony every day for the week before I left to drink my coffee, and smile as I stared across the big, luxurious lawn to see her standing in the picture window, arms crossed, glaring at me. To make a long story short, the expensive lawyers she has convince her to pay our back wages with additional interest for violating state labor laws by withholding them.
17. Shifting The Focus
I work at a large chain grocery store in a well-to-do area. While many of our customers may look like typical stuck-up rich ladies, most are actually really nice and amazing people. That being said, I was racking carts and I hear this lady on the phone behind me muttering: "I don’t know why they come to this country, they can barely even speak the language. I’m behind on right now who's probably a terrorist”!
I look in the window’s reflection and I can see that she's walking behind a young woman in a hijab who has a small child. The young woman just put her son in a cart and I can see that she looks like she's about to cry. So I decide, forget it…I'll take the hit for her. I spin around to this woman and shout: "Oi! I take bloody exception to that! Just because I’m Irish does NOT mean I am or ever was in the IRA”!
I look at both of them. Both were speechless and all the lady does is point at the young woman. So I continue, this time speaking to the young woman: "You saw that, didn’t you?! This lady just called me a bloody terrorist! I might speak Gaelige and wear a Catholic cross! I might even be from Ireland! And darn it I’m bloody proud! But I AM NOT A TERRORIST”!
At this point my manager walks over to see what all the fuss is about. I say: "This lady just called me a terrorist”! I turned to the young woman and asked: "You heard her call me that too, right"? My manager looks at the young woman and instantly catches on. He tells the woman that that kind of conduct is not okay in our store, no matter who it's directed at or why, and that she needs to leave.
Lady, still completely speechless, just turns around and walks out. I turn to the young woman and tell her: "I do apologize about the yelling ma'am, but I’m proud of who I am! If you need anything while you're shopping, just let me or one of my coworkers know”. The woman thanks me and pushes her cart away while sporting the biggest grin.
My manager then makes the comment "Entertainment tonight: $0. Teaching a lesson about discrimination: $0. Seeing that young woman walking away sporting a grin like the Cheshire cat: priceless".
19. Don’t Mess With Me
This happened about five years ago when I moved into a wheelchair-friendly unit. I have parking, but one of the other tenants who doesn’t, James, would constantly park in my car space. Every time I confronted him about it, he claimed not to know anything, but he'd park there anyway. I informed the landlords about this and they sent out constant letters until he finally got the message.
But did he park on the street? Nope. He did something much worse. He started to park his car along the driveway, sometimes blocking my exit. To get out of my door I go down a ramp and then turn onto the driveway, but he would park his car and block my exit. There was no back exit so this was my only way to exit my place. I told the landlords about this and the council parking officer in hopes they could make him stop doing this.
I confronted him a few times and told him not to do this and warned him that his car might get damaged if I try to get my wheelchair around it. But did he listen? Nope. One glorious day when I needed to leave, I saw his car parked halfway across my exit. There was JUST enough room for me to get around, but I knew I would scrape the side of his car with the side of my power wheelchair if I tried to get around it.
I had two options: stay home and miss my appointments or try and get around his car. I went with option B. Before you have a go at me for damaging his car, it was an old beat-up tin can that already had some scratches on it. What's one more? When I got home, I couldn’t believe my eyes. His car was still parked there! So I called a tow truck company and told them there was a car parked and blocking access to my home.
I don't like using my disability to my advantage but I'd had enough! The call went something like this: ME: "Ah, hello? Um, yes. I'm so sorry to b-b-bother you, but I'm in a w-w-wheelchair and I c-c-can't get into my house because there's a c-c-car parked there. It's my n-n-neighbor and he won't stop p-p-parking there. I n-n-need to get inside." "Oh my god, what?? What's the address? We'll be right there!"
10 minutes later, the tow truck arrived. He saw the car and me, stuck out in the driveway with tears (dramatized for effect) in my eyes. Not long before the driver was about to tow the car away, James came out screaming "WAIT!! WHAT AH YA DOIN??? THAT'S MY CARRR!!" The rest was him yelling inaudible sentences asking why his car was being towed and threatening to sue the tow truck company.
He moved away about two years ago, but in the remaining time he lived there, he parked his car on the street.
19. The Best Revenge Is Petty
My mother-in-law is very entitled. She visits and plops herself on the couch and expects us to wait on her hand and foot. The couch may as well be her throne. I had told my wife I had one rule for her visit: no news. I can't stand having the news on. It's nothing but things crafted to get you angry or afraid. My mother-in-law was informed of this multiple times.
However, she insists she can't live without knowing what is going on. As soon as we go to put my daughter to bed, I hear the news on. That’s when I decided to get petty revenge on her. My TV is controlled by Google Home. My phone is tied into the system so acts as a home unit. I tell it to turn off the TV. She puts the TV back on. I turn it off, she turns it back on. I then go into the FIOS app and block news channels.
She does something I didn't realize that could be done and had Google turn on CNN on YouTube, but she doesn't know the difference though between the TV and the YouTube feed so...cue pettier revenge. I use the app to pause the playback. My wife is now trying to laugh quietly. She waits a few minutes, has Google start it again and I immediately pause the playback so she again has a frozen screen.
She is screaming about how the TV is frozen, so I shout down it must be the storm we are having and the cable is down. It gave me such a warm fuzzy feeling.
20. Kiss Off
When I was in the seventh grade, the start-up my dad was a part of was failing miserably in no small part due to a straight-up crazy CEO. While at the CEO’s house, my dad observed the CEO's toddler daughter picking up a piece of dog poop and licking it. So he picked her up and told her to give her dad a big kiss.
21. A Little Humble Pie
Back when I was a waitress, I worked at this BBQ joint that had really narrow, awkwardly arranged tables so I always had to lean a bit over to serve the food. Anyhow, there was this table with a really obnoxious 4-year-old who kept grabbing at everything: My hands, my clothes, the tray I was serving from. He even untied my apron and my pens and cash flew everywhere. This went all through the whole meal.
Meanwhile, the parents didn't do a thing about it. In fact, the dad said it served me right for taking a job in food service. Total tools, all of them, and I knew I wasn't getting a decent tip. So towards the end of their meal, they order dessert—peanut butter silk pie, which is ooey-gooey sticky pie heaven. I knew just what to do.
I make sure to cover it in an extra mound of whipped cream and balance it precariously on the side of my tray, counter-balanced with a couple of soda refills for the parents. Sure enough, when I got to the table, the little freak made a grab for the tray and everything conveniently capsized all over him and his parents.
They were covered in diet coke, whipped cream, and the stickiest peanut putter pie you can imagine. I looked appropriately shocked and then said "I am SO sorry. Guess that's what happens when you have kids." Even managed to make it back to the kitchen before I cracked up, along with most of our staff. Serves them right.
22. Flying Too Close to the Sun
While teaching in Japan, one kid was just a little devil. He had no respect for me or the other students. I spoke with my office about this several times, because I felt he was a danger to the other students, but I was told it's Japanese culture to let their kids go wild during childhood because they would soon be under enormous stress once they hit junior high.
Well, this little brat was being particularly annoying one day, and actually shoves a little girl, who just falls face first to the floor and smashes her forehead against the ground. These students are only about four to five years old. When I saw what he'd done, I checked on the girl and saw she had a massive welt, at least the size of a golf ball, if not bigger, swelling up on her forehead.
I call my office to report the incident, while restraining the kid, who proceeds to dig his nails into my arm, which actually draws blood. All they say is try your best for the rest of the lesson and we can try to let the mom of the girl know what's happened. I knew I had to do something. Long story short, we end up drawing pictures at the end of class, and he decides to make a paper air plane instead.
He started to throw it around and was laughing and having a great time. This is when I ruined his day in the best way possible. I snatched it from him and crumpled the paper right there as he looked at me, then I threw it in the trash. The kid loses his mind and just cries uncontrollably for the last few minutes of class. No regrets.
23. Llorar a mares
I had a Spanish teacher, and in order to gain other students' sympathy, she would make fun of one of the students for the entire class. Of course, other students would sometimes laugh because the class was super boring so it was like a show. However, I HATED the whole thing. She would pick the students that didn't reply to her provocation, the low-profile type, and she would say "Oh, it's just a joke!"
One day, she chose the guy that never caused trouble for her next victim. She used him as an example to describe a homeless guy in a picture. After 10 (long) minutes, he stands up and leaves the classroom crying. And when she stops him before he leaves, he turns around the drops the mic. He says his dad passed the previous night and pushed her away.
Once the door closed behind him, she paused for a second, pretending to be crying, and mocked him saying, "My dad just passed cry cry, poor baby" Before I realized it, she had my Spanish book flying in her face, and I called her an "ugly witch." Yeah, yeah, my insult level isn't great in Spanish, but it got the job done!
24. Don’t Stop Believing
My dad is out of state on business driving through some no-name town when he goes through an intersection. Suddenly, a cop pulls him over and tickets him—stating that he ran a stop sign. My dad insisted that there was not any stop sign, but the cop did not listen. Furious, he went back to the intersection and saw that there was indeed a stop sign hidden behind a tree and twisted in the wrong direction!
Even more angry, he went into a convenience store and bought a disposable camera. The clerk laughed because he saw what happened and knew what was up. Luckily, my dad had to be back there in a few weeks for work. The cop assumed that someone with out of state plates would just pay the ticket, and was shocked when my dad turned up in court, calmly presented his evidence to the judge, and strolled out in five minutes scot-free.
25. Invasion of Privacy
I took my brother-in-law's landlord to small claims court (He's on SSI and I'm his conservator). We sued her for over $4,000 after she just decided she didn't like him and changed the locks on his apartment door. She also stuffed all of his belongings into trash bags and dragged them out to the curb. This was all done the day after she cashed his rent check.
It all started because she was letting herself into his apartment with no notice and was going through his stuff while he was gone. When I found out about this, I told him to let her know that was NOT okay. He did, and that's why she kicked him out. I'm very organized, and presented the judge with a folder containing photos, receipts, short videos on DVD and the sheriff call logs, as well as a concise timeline of events.
The landlord showed up with her son and countersued for the exact same amount we were suing them for. Claiming that the apartment was trashed, there were holes in the walls and they would have to repair everything before being able to rent again. During the hearing, the judge asked for evidence of the damage to the room.
The son whipped out his cell phone and showed a video panning and walking around the room. The video showed my BIL's apartment obviously still being lived in (his stuff was all still there) and no visible damage, but there were a lot of posters and things hung on the walls. When the judge looked at the video he asked, "Where is the damage?" The son replied, "You can't see it. It's behind all of the posters."
The judge frowned and looked at the video again, and then said, "Did you take this video when he was still living there at this time?" The son replied, "Yes." This was the clincher, the judge then asked, "Did you ask his permission to enter the apartment to take this video?" Silence. We were awarded the full amount.
26. Back off My Buns
There was an elementary school next to my high school, and some of the kids who went there were really messed up. They were like eight or 10, standing outside and being rude little pukes to everyone who walked past them. We were actually shocked with their vocabulary. Anyway, one day I was walking by, alone, eating some buns.
This one kid comes up to me with a smug look on his face and yells, "GIVE ME A BUN, YOU IDIOT!" The look on my face was must have been something like shock or disbelief as I replied, "No! Screw Off!" to him before I turned my back on the kid and started walking away to get to my next class on time. Big. Mistake.
I suddenly feel a slight push and weight added to my back. The kid was hanging on my back, pulling my hair and screaming "GIVE ME A BUN!" I felt like I had been jumped by an angry leper gnome. In my panic, the only thought I had in my head was "OH MY GOD! GET THIS OFF OF ME!” In some weird move worthy of WWE, I spun around quickly while straightening my back and loosened my backpack, which caused this little demon to fly off me.
He spun around in the air and landed face-first on the concrete. He immediately started crying like the kid he was. I proceeded to walk over to him. His teary, fear-filled eyes stared up at me as I picked up my backpack. I turned my back on him again, picked up a new bun, and enjoyed the fading sound of that brat's crying as I walked away, eating my sweet bun.
27. Leaving His Mark
While teaching in China, I worked in a school where any kids who acted out got physically disciplined. I didn’t take part in that stuff, which worked for me—but it also meant I had to find other ways to punish them in order to get respect. One time, this kid was acting out and would just not listen to me, regardless of my normal go-to methods.
After the third time, I came up with the perfect solution. I placed the student in front of the class, and then asked each student in the class to come up and draw something on his face with a black pen. No remorse, he had it coming.
28. Falling Flat
Someone in my office would always crush lunches with his gigantic freaking lunch box. Either he ate bricks or lead, I don't know, but I always came to the office fridge and found that my lunch was in pieces. So, after three bouts of this and numerous notes from myself and other colleagues, I carefully removed his lunch box.
I emptied the contents of the lunch box. Then I ran over them with my car. Just completely flattened it all. But that's not even the best part. I then carefully packed it back into his lunch box, and put it back for him to find. I felt bad at first, but it was well worth the effort. He kept his lunch in a cooler by his cube from then on.
29. Don’t Stop the Party
I lived in an apartment with a roommate. We had neighbors who would throw crazy parties pretty frequently, often during the week. One day, my roommate who had to be awake early had enough and decided to pee on a metal pizza pan and stick it in the freezer. After a crazy party, he pulled the pan out, flipped it upside down to get a frozen disc of pee, then slid that disc under their door where it would soon melt on their fully carpeted entryway.
We woke up to them shouting at the people who crashed there about who peed on the floor what was wrong with them. Wish I could say they toned down their parties, but they didn't and eventually got evicted.
30. An Unexpected Journey
When I was a kid, my younger brother and I would go for extra Mandarin lessons after school. Then we'd take the bus back. He would never press the bell for the bus to stop because he knew I'd freak out and press the bell rather than miss the stop. So, one day when he was sitting on the bus, but a row in front of me, I made sure to get off the stop before ours.
I laughed my butt off when I saw the bus miss not just our stop but disappear into the distance. Petty? Sure.
31. Cash and Carry
I occasionally deliver pizza as a part-time job. There is a customer who tends to pay with a big bag of change. I don't mean a bag full of quarters, I mean a bag full of dimes, nickels, and pennies. Since his meal typically costs about $20, the bag usually weighs several pounds. It is a total pain to count out all of the change, so typically drivers will just assume that he has the correct amount and leave.
Usually, he has just enough or maybe a few cents over. I don't think this is an innocent thing either, as he usually gives the bag of change with a big grin. It is such a pain that most of the drivers know his address by heart, and avoid going to his house if at all possible. So, I was having a bad night, and by the luck of the draw got this dude's house.
I remembered reading something involving someone paying in a checkout line with a bag of change, and I knew I could use a similar method to take my frustration out on this guy in the pettiest way possible. I pulled up to his house and left the pizza in the car. I rang the doorbell, and when he answered I saw the large bag of change in his hand that I knew would be there.
He asked where his pizza was, and I said, "New policy, sir. Gotta count it out before we can give out the pizza." So I sat down on his doorstep and started to count out all of the change. At one point, I even asked if he could turn on his porch light, because I was having a hard time seeing. He did end up sitting there while I counted out the entire bag of change, even though it took about ten minutes.
He ended up being about a dollar over, so I started picking up pennies to give him his change back, when he said that I could keep the rest as a tip. When I gave him his pizza, he sheepishly told me sorry and then shut the door. The whole situation was incredibly awkward, and to my knowledge he hasn't ordered pizza from us in a while.
32. Walking on Sunshine
My older brother once threw me into the ceiling and let me drop to the floor. So, for the next year or so, I would always wait until he would leave the room, and then I would go into his closet and pee in his shoes. I didn't tell him for around 20 years. When I finally did, he said "I could never figure out why my feet always smelled so bad!"
33. Family Feud
In grade school when I was about 11 years old, a guy on the school bus relentlessly teased my 9-year-old younger brother. For months, this guy just wouldn't stop harassing him. I finally got sick of it, confronted him, and told him to knock it off. This didn't slow him down one bit. As soon as I got out of his face, the teasing and badgering continued. So I took it to the next level.
I casually hopped back into the same seat as this guy and then I slammed his head into the window so hard that the window cracked. He didn't say a word, but I could see him quietly try to cover up his tears. With that done, I went back to my seat. He never messed with my brother again, nor did anybody else on that bus, come to think of it.
Normally I am not a physically aggressive person, but after seeing my little brother tormented every day, I had enough. I never felt bad for hurting the kid, since he had it coming. Still, I surprised myself that I actually did slam him, but I would do it again in a heartbeat to protect my little brother. You don’t mess with my family.
34. Reporting for Duty
My first high school boyfriend was not very good with grades, so he asked me to make him a fake report card to show his parents in order to avoid getting into trouble. He also cheated on me with my best friend and dumped me. He then promised to get back together with me if I forged the report card for him as originally planned.
I agreed to this arrangement, right up until the day when we were meant to get our report cards from school. I abruptly told him that I didn't do it. He got bashed by his dad when he got home for the string of Ds and Fs.
35. Anything You Can Do, I Can Do Better
I completed my studies in Asia. And as such there are some pretty big cultural differences. One day in class a lecturer who was known for being a little nuts walked into class in a particularly poor mood. As an example we had a student from China whose English was fairly underdeveloped, and he needed to look at the slideshow on his laptop to follow and take notes in his native language. He kicked him out of class because he had his laptop out while he was talking and when he tried to explain, the lecturer threatened to leave the class and file a report against us.
On this day he got upset with me because I mentioned to a nearby classmate that I needed a pen. He shouted at me, saying “You there! Are you having fun?! Do you think you could teach this class?! Come up here and teach! I dare you!” Little did he know I am a certified lecturer and have taught TESOL students young and old for three years. So I did. When I was done with his three page slideshow, I went and sat down in my place. He yelled a little more, then left the class.
36. Two Can Play at That Game
In a previous relationship of mine, my girlfriend cheated on me with some guy we both know. So, to get my revenge, I slept with that guy's girlfriend. We just did it to spite both of them. And it was totally worth it just for the chance to see their reactions when they found out.
37. Very Amusing
When I was about 13 years old, my family had saved up to take us to the Six Flags Over Georgia amusement park. It's about a two-hour drive away from our house, so we left early to get there as soon as it opened. That way, we wouldn't have to fight any crowds at the gate. As we pulled into the parking lot, we found a decent spot in an area that was already packed.
As we started to pull into the spot, a car of four 20-something-year-olds cut us off and took the spot. Ok, whatever we think. But no. To add insult to injury, the driver then got out and yelled, "What the heck are you gonna do about it, loser?" His buddies all had a good laugh and headed over to the gate. I could tell that my dad was steamed, but he kept his mouth shut.
We eventually found another spot and, as we were heading to the gate, my dad said he’d be right back and walked off. Fast forward to the end of the day. The park was closed and we were the last group of people making our way out. We hopped into the car and, lo and behold, as we were leaving the parking lot, we saw the car from earlier with four flat tires and four annoyed guys just sitting there.
My dad drives by them and, without missing a beat, rolls down the window and yells "What the heck are you gonna do about it, losers?" as we drive off into the sunset.
38. Losing Her Professionalism
One day I did something to upset my awful, seventh-grade English teacher. I am not really sure what it was, but man, she was mad. One day, she walked around handing back an assignment and when she got to me, she just looked at me, gave me an evil smile, and kept walking. Knowing I would get a zero if I didn't hand in the assignment, I raised my hand and said “excuse me, I didn’t get a paper.”
She just replied, “don’t talk to me.” I told her I needed a paper to do the assignment, but she just responded with the same words. I went off! I told her she was extremely unprofessional and disgraceful, and that I was going to the principal. I walked out and marched right down to the office. That's where I learned that I was far from the first to complain against this teacher. Surprise, surprise, she "resigned" at the end of the year. Good riddance.
39. A Classic Move
This was my best revenge. I went through an awful divorce. My ex-wife cheated on me, told lies about me, and all throughout the divorce I took the high road and was there for my kids while she disappeared off the face of the Earth. Her birthday was only a couple of weeks after the divorce was final. As the kids were young, I was a good guy and purchased several presents from the kids to her. But I got one special “gift” just from me.
Among the gifts, I bought a necklace with a big red “A” at the end. Her first name is Ann. I had the kids give that to her and she wore her scarlet letter all around town. Most people in our town knew what she had done, and some were even aware of the necklace. Yup, I made my adulterous ex-wife wear the scarlet letter.
40. Shop Till You Drop
While I was out shopping with a friend, there was this little brat running around in the store. His mom was nowhere to be found, and he was just running wild and knocking over stacks of shirts, screaming at the top of his lungs, just acting like a complete and total brat. This went on for at least 5 excruciating minutes, all during the time we're in the line to pay for our items.
Then, we see him running full speed towards us. My friend has had it with this little puke, so she came up with an ingenious plan. The moment he hit us, she turns around with her newly purchased items and whacks the bag straight into him. The kid immediately starts screaming and crying. We hightailed it out of there, but I have no remorse whatsoever. Honestly, it felt great.
41. Car Trouble
I had a friend in high school who became a total tool during our senior year. There were a bunch of little things that added up to our friendship falling apart. At the worst point of it, I pooped on his car one night. Real simple, I just crawled up on the hood of his car and took a poop on his windshield. I just knew that he'd walk outside the next day and think, "What the heck is this?"
Fun fact: we're actually great friends again now. He still has no idea it was me.
42. Calling His Bluff
I worked in a laboratory for a while and we had this one coworker who was the type that had to one-up everyone and constantly brag about how fantastic he was. He particularly liked to tell us about how much he benches at the gym, but I could always tell he was exaggerating. So one day when he left early, I went over and tightened the lids on all his bottles.
Watching him have to go and ask colleagues to open his bottles for him after all those claims of having superhuman strength was hilarious.
43. Selective Memory
My mom was a language teacher at my high school, and years after I had graduated, she called me kind of upset because a group of guys was trying to make her look dumb. The class was supposed to write one of those team dialogues in Spanish. They had a week or so to prepare it, then they had to perform it in front of the class.
When she called on them to do theirs, they said: "But we already did ours, we're not doing it again." She said, "You definitely didn't do it, I don't have any record of it here and I would remember it if you had." They simply refused to do it, insisting they already performed it and that it was her fault she didn't take notes or put their scores down.
She was in the middle of questioning herself when one of the good kids came and told her the truth. They hadn't really done it, and they had just been bragging about making her look stupid. They apparently even threatened the class if they said anything. Well, obviously my mom was appalled, but she came up with an amazing revenge plot.
My mom was really into yoga at the time and got a great idea while meditating. She went in the next day and said, "Boys, I owe you an apology. I found my notes on your presentation and I do remember it, I don't know how I forgot!" She then went on to describe all the grammatical mistakes they made, all their word choice flaws, everything. All made up. She failed them all on the project, and they couldn't do a thing about it without admitting they'd made it all up.
44. Simple Physics
I remember having to defend myself on a speeding accusation. I had footage of the dashcam, which clearly showed me not speeding. I was going 30 mph, but the officer claimed I was driving 50 mph. The dashcam footage showed him driving at 40 mph and catching up to me fairly quickly. That’s when he decided to pipe in and make a fool of himself.
He asked, "If you were really going 30, then why did I have to go 40 to catch up to you?” I responded, “Because in order to catch up to anything, you have to go faster than what you're following. If I was going 50, you would have never caught up to me while going 40.”
45. No Parking Zone
I lived in a duplex that shared one large driveway with another duplex. Parking could be tight, but all of us cooperated and made the best of it, except for one woman. She left a note on my car two days after my husband and I moved in, telling me not to park there because she didn’t like that I was "in front of her door."
I was at least 15 feet away from her house and that was the only spot I could park in without blocking anyone else. I left her a note back explaining this. She banged on my door at 11 PM and screamed at us, calling me the c-word, and demanding that I get rid of my car. We eventually shut the door on her. The nasty notes persisted and were ignored.
I confirmed with my landlord that this is where I should be parking and he said yes, ignore her. Then, she started barricading that part of the driveway, so that every day when I got home, I would have to get out of my car and move her stuff before I could park. This became a real pain in the neck when I broke my elbow.
She used her trash can, a pedestal with a birdcage on it, and a bench to block the driveway and I had to move all of them to park. I started just picking them up and gently moving them towards her porch. Then she came up with something else. She started putting Vaseline on them. I grabbed her trash can and got a gloppy handful of Vaseline. Sure enough, everything else was coated in it as well.
I decided to use my foot to push everything up against her house. Mind you, nothing was damaged or knocked over, just moved. She called law enforcement and reported that she saw me vandalizing her things by picking them up and throwing them into her house, kicking stuff over, and smashing them into the ground. The officer was angry.
He thought that I was the teenage girlfriend of the guy who lived there, not the adult leaseholder. So he pounded on the door yelling, "Sheriff's department! Come outside!" We went outside. He pointed to me and asked, "Are you the girlfriend!?" I resisted the urge to say something snarky in response to what I found to be a misogynistic and demeaning statement.
He went off on me saying, "Your behavior needs to stop right now, I don't know where you're from, but in [town] we do not tolerate this kind of disrespect blah blah blah!" Well, he didn’t know what he was in for. 15 minutes later, once we'd gotten a word in edgewise, he changed his tune pretty quick. He realized he'd been misled by our neighbor. We told him we were sorry he got dragged into a petty parking dispute.
He told us he's been dragged into stupider stuff and told us that if she puts up the barricades again, to call them instead of moving it ourselves, to protect ourselves from false allegations. In fact, he wanted us to call any time she does anything to harass us. She also received a mean letter from the landlord telling her to knock it off.
We got a mean note from her saying, "The reason I don't want you parking by my door is because you are trash! Your druggie psychopath girlfriend runs amok vandalizing! I want nothing to do with you," among other things. We called law enforcement and she got spoken to by them, and the landlord sent her another mean letter. Hopefully, that'll be the end of it.
46. Susan Snags Spanakopita And Succumbs To Shame
I used to work with this super-entitled woman once upon a time. Her name was Susan. Susan liked to get to the office way earlier than everyone else, but I didn't find out why that was until I'd worked there for a few months. She was the sort who liked to help herself to the snacks people had stashed in the communal fridge.
She'd also take individual sodas from the case my cubicle neighbor kept under her desk, and had a real thing for stealing either my chocolate or my good granola bars, depending on what I had stashed, right out of my desk drawer. But she got her comeuppance one year at the office Christmas potluck. We had a lady who did Greek cooking and was magnificent at it.
This particular year, she'd brought in an enormous tray of mini spanakopita, the spinach and feta cheese in phyllo dough. Each roughly the size of an Oreo cookie. Literally hundreds of these little beauties, stacked two high on the tray, just waiting to be devoured. And then along came Susan, with the Tupperware of Holding.
I kid you not, she scooped fully 1/4 of the contents of that tray into her Tupperware, looking around furtively to make sure no one would try to stop her. She brushed the phyllo crumbs from her fingers, popped the seal on her massive Tupperware, and turned smugly away from the buffet table...and every single person in the office was glaring at her, fit to set her permanently ablaze.
Our office manager was particularly salty, because she, dear reader, was the Greek chef who had provided these delicious morsels. She spoke, and it was with the voice of a vengeful Goddess. "SUSAN, WHAT IN THE HECK DO YOU THINK YOU'RE DOING?!" Crickets. And then, the foot-tapping began. Tap. Tap. Tap. And the hand on the hip.
And finally, the FINGER OF DOOM did aim at Susan, Thief of Treats, Hoarder of Spanakopita. And Susan did meekly open her Tupperware, and return unto the tray roughly 90% of the 'pita. Thus was the Office Manager appeased, and thus was Susan forever sneak-shamed.
47. Hotel Havoc
I used to work as a front desk agent at a boutique hotel. A guy who was obviously very full of himself came in with an online reservation that he had booked at a shockingly cheap nightly rate. He proceeded to give me a hard time about EVERYTHING, from telling me he shouldn't have to give me his credit card info since he had prepaid his reservation, to telling me "Um yeah, I'm pretty sure I can find the elevators, I'm not stupid."
He was just being the worst. About 10 minutes after checking him in, he came down and demanded that we give him a bigger room with a king bed and a view, even though he had booked a standard queen bed online. I complied, as we had extra king beds available. 10 minutes later, he came down again to complain about the size of the room.
He told me, "I'm only going to give you one more chance to make me happy," and asked for the general manager. After much arguing between him and my manager, we ended up giving him our nicest suite AND free parking since we had "Given him trouble." He got all this for a way cheaper rate, like $40 per night! Oh, but he outdid himself.
Get this: He informed us shortly after the ordeal, while on his way out to dinner, that he was not even going to be in the room for the majority of his stay, as he was visiting friends and would be staying at their home. What the heck! So I made it my personal mission to make his life a living nightmare from that point on.
I reset his room keys every time I saw him leave the hotel—which was quite frequently, 3-4 times a day. It was particularly funny when he came back tired from a night out and had to come all the way down to the front desk to get his keys fixed. Needless to say, he was very frustrated by the end of his stay. I doubt he'll be staying with us again.
48. Going Out with a Bang
I did not like the overly condescending boss that I had at my last job. One day, while looking over my shoulder at my work as usual, he said: "Can I ask a stupid question?" Since it was my last week at that job anyway, I immediately came back and responded with: "You seem qualified!" I have to say I was pretty proud of myself!
49. What A Beautiful Sight
Over the course of six months, through countless phone calls to different union offices and the department of labor, I eventually got my boss fired for changing people's time-keeping information to take overtime from them. During those months I was treated like dirt by this guy, but I never actually did anything wrong so I couldn't be punished.
At one point, management—against contract rules—denied my time off request to be at my best friend’s wedding and my boss brought me into his office and threatened to fire me. At this point, I had called the northeast district business associate on him, and I will never forget the look on my boss’s face when he realized I knew he couldn't do anything to me.
50. Pumpkin Spice Vengeance
I have a friend whose elaborate pumpkin display at the end of his driveway would be run over every year this one tool in our neighborhood. My friend decided to put a stop to it. He withdrew a bunch of money from his savings account so he would have enough to buy the largest pumpkin he could find, along with several large bags of cement. He filled that puppy up and made a really pretty display.
The idiot took the bait. He broke the axle of his car when he hit that pumpkin. Could not drive away. The cherry on top was when my friend then had his car towed.
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