Every action has an equal and opposite reaction…especially in real life. Bad actions are met with some equally bad karma. These Redditors shared stories when someone’s bad actions were met with exactly what they deserved.
1. An Awful Accident
While working for the fire department, I was on a call for a multi-vehicle rollover accident on the interstate. We got on the interstate one exit away, running into traffic, so we moved over to the emergency lane seeing lights and sirens. We were about halfway there, and a BMW pulls in front of us trying to cut through the traffic, he didn't even look. I couldn't believe it—but he was just getting started.
I laid into the air horn, and he came to a complete stop, with his middle finger out the window. I'd had a lot of people do stupid things when seeing lights coming at them, but this guy was being a jerk for the sake of being a jerk. He got out of his car and started screaming at us. Meanwhile, he was blocking the only fire engine and two ambulances available.
People were really hurt half a mile away, and he was making his stand because we honked our air horn at him for blocking us. I looked out at my mirror to see a highway patrolman running between lanes towards us…the guy was so mad. BMW boy was immediately handcuffed, his pretty car got pushed out of the way into a ditch, and he got taken away.
2. Impatience Hurts
I was stopped at a red light waiting to turn right. I couldn't see if there was any traffic coming because of how the intersection was set up, and there was a bus in the left turn lane, so I was just waiting for a green. The person behind me clearly wanted me to turn because she was honking, yelling, and giving me the finger.
After a couple of seconds, she decided to drive around me and was immediately T-boned. Karma!
3. Karma Times Two
Where I used to live was a rural area on the outskirts of a small city in Australia. I was heading home from work one night, and the road back to my place is several kilometers long and completely straight. There were cane fields on either side and no streetlights, so it was very dark. Many people speed down the road because it's a back road and rarely patrolled.
I was driving along doing the speed limit and this guy comes roaring up behind me with his high beams on. He sits right behind me then tears around to overtake and takes off doing at least 120 kilometers per hour. Less than a minute later, he must have hit the dirt shoulder and begins to lose control before hitting a slight dip and literally flies through the air into a cane paddock.
At this point, it's a mixture of absolute shock and wanting to pull over and just laugh. Then, red and blue lights flash up ahead, not 50 meters from the guy. I had never seen an officer on this road before that night so I couldn't believe it! I pulled up to ask if he needed any help from me and he goes "Nah, you get home, I got this jerk". Double instant karma.
4. In Someone Else’s Shoes
I was seventeen and went to a party where there were kids from two different high schools. When I went inside, I took off my brand-new Nike Air Mada shoes that I had just bought for $140. Hours later, when I went to leave, my shoes were gone. We had an idea of who took them—a guy from the other school—but I didn’t have proof.
I was so sad and so embarrassed. I had to drive home in my socks. Long story short, a week later, the girl who threw the party shows up on my doorstep holding something behind her back. Turns out she went to a party and saw the guy who took my shoes—wearing them! When he took them off, she snagged them! Now, standing in front of me she reveals my Nikes!
She told me the best part was watching him look for them just like I had and then leave in his socks!
5. Caught In A Blizzard!
I was driving home on the highway during a horrible blizzard at night. The roads were extremely slick and dangerous, I was going about 30 mph. My daughter was a newborn, and it was the first time I had ever driven in the snow with her. I was nervous. Some jerk in a huge truck is doing 65, passing everyone in the slow lane, and just being really risky and ignorant to the conditions and other drivers in general.
He passed me, and I was like, "You're gonna crash bro." Right at that moment, the dude fishtails, loses control, and crashes into a ditch. Don't worry though, he was completely fine. I know this because I saw him emerge from the truck and do a little angry freak out dance. His truck wasn't fine. That's what you get for endangering others during a blizzard!
6. That’s What You Get!
At the end of the day in the locker room after gym class, this freshman kid who was really popular and always talked a lot of trash started messing with this guy who was kind of awkward and kind of got picked on a lot. Apparently, they got in each others' way in flag football or something. The awkward guy ignores the cocky kid for a while until the cocky kid pushed him.
The awkward guy had enough and hit the cocky guy in the face three times before he hit the ground. He knocked his front teeth out. As we were all leaving school and talking about it, the overall consensus was, "Well, that's what happens when you talk that much".
7. It’s Really Coming Down!
I was driving on a thruway during a storm with a huge amount of rain and sleet. The speed limit is typically 65, but the rain was so torrential that the visibility was no further than two cars ahead. As such, everyone was driving about 25 due to the visibility and traffic congestion. For whatever reason, two cars pass me going probably 65 as if it was a sunny and cloudless day.
About 20 seconds after they pass, I see two cars facing the wrong way in the median, plus another two cars in a ditch on the outside of the road. Unfortunately, there were two innocent drivers that were affected by the karma of these two dangerous drivers.
8. Please, Take A Seat
I took a full flight home from Hawaii. I go to my assigned window seat and notice a grumpy woman sitting in it. I politely tell her she is in my seat. She looks at her boarding pass and sure enough, she is supposed to be sitting in the aisle seat across. She starts arguing that she must sit next to her husband and that she is not going to move.
I decide it's not worth the hassle and take the seat she is supposed to be in. I don't even get a thank you or anything from her. Well, she got what was coming to her in the end. Once we are in the air, the onboard entertainment of free movies and shows becomes available. I look over and see her yelling at a flight attendant that her TV is broken and doesn't work. The flight attendant apologizes and explains that the flight is full and there are no other seats to move her to.
She had the pleasure of enjoying a five-hour flight with zero entertainment.
9. No, Me First!
I was walking up to an ATM and a dude in a Ferrari parked at a red curb and ran past me to use it before I could. I was like, "Really, dude?" and he says, "Blow me". I looked around in kind of dazed disbelief and saw an officer about 50 feet away. I waved to get his attention, and when he saw me, I just sort of held both hands out at the Ferrari and the red curb.
The traffic officer cruises over and starts writing a ticket. I waited for the dude to finish at the ATM and when he saw the officer writing the ticket, I told him that they didn't even notice his parking job until I flagged him down and showed him.
10. Shopping With Mom
I worked at a K-mart in high school. It was a small store, so I worked everything, electronics, stocking, and cashier. You name it, I did it. I asked a woman and her son, about 12 or 13, if they needed help finding anything as I was out on the floor, and the kid immediately yells at me for annoying him. I ignore it and go about my business.
Right after that, I get called to checkouts. As I'm working there, here comes the pair. The kid has gone all out back in the electronics area, with some EA sports titles and a GTA game. I'm checking them out when the age prompt comes up for the M-rated game. I decide to take a chance. I flip the game over and inform the mother that "This game has been rated M for the following reasons" and read the list off the back of the case.
There is an awkward silence, then she angrily informs me that the son said it was only a little violent. She was so mad that he wasn't able to get anything that day.
11. Up On The Curb
My dad was driving back from the shore when traffic got really bad. About a mile ahead, there was an accident that had brought traffic to a crawl. This stuff happens, so my dad decides to be patient about it. Others weren’t so patient. People began driving on the shoulder in order to get ahead of the traffic, and this annoys my dad.
We all know how this goes. We do the right thing and are punished for it, whereas these people are skipping in front traffic and will probably get away with it. He thought about following this stream of cars onto the shoulder, but he decided he’d do the right thing and wait. As he got closer, he saw something absolutely unforgettable.
There were two traffic officers in a parking lot. One was directing all of the shoulder drivers into the parking lot, while the other wrote all of them tickets. My dad describes it as one of the most satisfying things he’s ever seen.
12. Pinching Pennies
As the lowest-ranking person at my job, I got to do all of the grunt labor and random tasks that required working on weekends and such. Even though I was a master engineer working in a 9-5 job, I was being paid less than a pizza delivery driver. Then, my boss decided that I no longer got to comp time because I was salaried and "it was part of the job".
So, when I quit to get my PhD, they realized that I hadn't used any vacation time. The ultra-penny pincher had to write me a check for two extra months’ worth of pay as I walked out the door.
13. Spikes On The Road
I was driving into a construction zone where three lanes converged into one. Right at the point it became one lane, a car tried to pass me on my right. I slowed down so he wouldn't hit me, but he ran over one of those metal lane dividers. It got caught up in his back right wheel well and went around a few times. I could see and hear it make a mess of his fender.
Last I saw, he was pulling over to inspect the damage.
14. Zero Offers
I worked selling shoes for two years on a weekend-only basis during school at a national chain. During that whole time, I was never offered a raise, never offered to open the store, and never given any recognition. When I asked for some more responsibilities, I was told I was unimportant, as two new outside managers were coming in.
One managed a section of PetSmart, and the other had no prior experience. I put in my two weeks’ notice. I could never have predicted just how much it would blow up in their faces. Both people came in on my last day, so I showed them everything I learned and all the small quirks of the inventory that we had. Both quit within a week, and the store closed within four months.
15. A Tangled Knot
In the UK, kids wear blazers and ties to school and a common bullying tactic that jerks used was to run up to kids, and pull their ties so they get really tight. It’s called “knotting”. On the bus home, the bus was really full, and I was standing in front of one such jerk. He grabbed my tie JUST as the bus had to brake sharply.
He lost his footing and the only thing keeping him upright was the fact that he was holding my tie. He had grabbed the wrong bit, it wasn't knotted, I simply untied it, he fell on his bum. That was the last time I was knotted.
16. Plugging In
At a job as a mechanic, I got a part that was completely correct except the electrical plug was a different shape. I found out after I installed it. For the record, it did plug in, it just didn't have long enough prongs to communicate. I had to order the right part again, take this one-off, and install the right one, all while only getting paid to put the correct one on.
My co-worker laughed and said "Bet you won't make that mistake again. Pay attention next time!" The very next job, he put all four tires on backward (some tires are directional). I said the same thing to him. I knew I would eventually use it against him, didn't know it would be that soon.
17. All Day, Every Day
At my last job, I had a new senior manager hired to run my division and our sister division. After working with him for six months, I reached my breaking point. He would call after 5 PM to see if I were still there; he would email me at 1 AM asking for amendments to his morning meetings presentations regarding my division.
He would even ask my receptionist to take notes regarding the goings-on in my office. He was the worst boss I've ever worked for, but the job market was tight, and this paid the bills. The final straw came when I returned from a week off. He approached me and asked why I was quitting. I told him I wasn't and that he'd be the first to know if I did. He called me a liar and walked away.
I sent him an email that afternoon resigning with three weeks’ notice. In my exit interview, I told the HR team everything, and I mean everything, about the stuff he pulled. Four weeks later he was fired.
18. The Muscle Car
I saw a guy in a gorgeous sports car, maybe a Ferrari, honking and yelling at a pedestrian in the crosswalk. The pedestrian had the right of way and was crossing during the signal. Immediately after they passed, the guy guns it and darts around the corner, and rear-ends a patrol car that was in the middle of writing a ticket.
There was a truck parked on the street that was just enough to obstruct the Ferrari guy’s line of sight through the turn. It was glorious. I didn't even see it happen; I just heard the crunch right after he turned the corner.
19. The Llama Keeper
I used to be a zookeeper. This lady who was visiting was making fun of our llama for looking ugly. The llama was a rescue who had corrective jaw surgery. The woman pointed and laughed at our llama. Right as that happened, the llama spat in her mouth. The whole scene was absolutely hilarious. After she left, I gave the llama a treat and told her that she was a good girl.
20. The Class Clown
One time in middle school, this guy who was relatively new at our school was making fun of a girl in our class who fell in the hallway in-between classes. Coincidentally, this was a girl I had a crush on. He was a little bit of a class clown and was mocking her, making her look stupid and clumsy. Apparently, he misjudged his footing, and while attempting to jokingly ape the way she had fallen, he actually fell for real. He landed squarely on his back in front of everybody—but that’s not the funniest part.
He broke his arm in the process. Passing him by in the hallway, I saw him just lying there, surrounded by adults, and staring up at the ceiling. He didn't come back to school. Fairly sure he moved after that. I would have too.
21. One, Two, Three!
I was targeted for firing. It had nothing to do with my performance, and everything to do with my manager's manager who took a disliking to me. I walked the line of perfection for about a month until I found another job. I handed in my two weeks' notice. That was victory number one. Then, I stole about a half-dozen of their employees and got them hired into my new company.
That was victory number two. I'd like to think that victory number three was the 30 or 40 employees they lost in the following year, but I can’t claim direct responsibility for that. Thing is, when you have employees with high-demand skills like software engineering, you best treat them right.
22. Demonstration Tension
I was trying to sell my apple-seed biodiesel processor. One guy came by who seemed genuinely interested. He said he would pay me $100 to give a demonstration of the entire process. Apparently, he was some big shot with a garage and a fleet of heavy equipment. I demonstrated the first 90% of the process and explained the rest.
Days and weeks go by, and I haven't seen my $100 or the guy. I found out he had tried to make his own processor and failed epically. He ruined two awfully expensive dump trucks. They are still sitting behind his house.
23. When You’re The Youngest
When I was growing up, I was the youngest of all the kids on my block. The other kids, including my sister, would have fun tormenting me. They would try and exclude me from things they did on the basis of "you have to be a certain number of years old to do it”. The worst of them was Marcus, who would always be completely mean to me.
One day, Marcus and I, along with some of the other kids, went to a nearby school to ride around on our scooters. Marcus convinced me that to be "cool," I had to jump down a flight of five stairs. I succeeded but broke my scooter in the process. As the kids rode off, laughing at me for not being able to join them, Marcus' front wheel caught in a crack in the concrete.
He flew over the handlebars straight into a flagpole. I nearly fell over laughing. I broke my scooter; he broke his face.
24. A Game Of Hide And Seek
My little sister's friend was being really mean to me; following me around, mocking everything I said, making rude commentary on everything I did. I told her she shouldn't do things like that to someone older than her, because it could have dire consequences. I was just joking—but I ended up being totally right. They conned me into playing hide and seek with them and the rules were to stay in the house.
I searched high and low for that girl and couldn't find her anywhere. My sister had no clue either and neither of us heard the doors open, so we didn't think she could be out there. Turns out the kid decided to disregard the rules and go outside. Well...she hid in the back of my mom's truck. It has a camper shell that can be locked from the outside.
Someone saw it open and locked it while the kid was hiding inside, so she was stuck there alone for a while. I volunteered to unlock it and I took my sweet time, staring at her with this really wide grin. It was great.
25. Biting Them Back
I worked for a small lottery parlor chain for the better part of a year back around 2008. It was a single-employee operation, so I worked a 10-hour shift with no breaks or lunch. All in all, it wasn't a bad job, and had good tips. One day, out of the blue, the region manager calls me into the store and tells me that I'm suspended.
There was no warning whatsoever. I asked her why, and she flat out tells me that I'm frightening away the patrons because of my sexuality. The next day, she calls me to say that I'm no longer needed. I tried for a lawsuit, but it was a he-said-she-said kind of thing. Flash forward to last month. I get a call asking me if I want to take part in a class-action lawsuit against this company for discrimination and unfair wage compensation practices.
I told them my story and now I'm a class representative for the case. I'm so ready to give them what they deserve.
26. Sketchy Shift Schedules
I worked at a coffee chain as my first job during high school. I worked a ton and the customers loved me. The place was run by this awful general manager who let her two daughters work there—one being a normal employee who got treated like an angel and always got shifts she wanted and the other being an incompetent shift leader who got the same treatment.
Well one week, this girl looks at her schedule and then asks if she can trade two of her shifts with two of mine because she forgot about her Mom's birthday. I said sure, no problem, because I was just trying to be nice. So, the next week when I get my schedule, I am only working one shift, and I asked why. The general manager’s reply was brutal. They told me "if you don't like the shifts I give you, then you won't get any".
She did not care at all why I traded the shifts, so I immediately put my two weeks in and said I was over all of this. The last day I was supposed to work was a Saturday morning which is always packed, and if one person doesn't show up or do their job well it makes the whole morning awful. I forgot I had to work and was out super late.
The next morning, I said screw it and just skipped work. They called and texted me several times begging to know where I was. It felt good.
27. Job Denied
I worked at a shoe store a while back. When I applied, I really wanted to be a sales associate, but the manager told me she only had room for a stock guy for the time being, and then she could transfer me to sales when she had an opening. Being a stock guy in a shoe store in a mall sucked, you have to stack the shoes way high up on rolling racks in a complicated alphabetical numeric sequence based on style, color, and size.
When new shipments come in, you have to shift all the shoes on ALL the racks over, just enough so you have space for the new styles. It takes a ridiculous amount of planning, foresight, and even physical endurance to climb up ladders with big boxes of boots and stack them in order all day long. Anyway, I inquired a few times as to how that sales position looked, since I had seen a few salespeople quit after I started work.
She kept saying "No, sorry, no room for a new sales guy yet." One particularly rough afternoon while I was working, she actually came back into the stock room to interview a new candidate for a sales position. RIGHT IN FRONT OF ME. So, I climbed down from the rolling racks, put the boxes away, and said "I thought you didn't have room for a sales associate right now. I quit, let this girl do stock."
28. Showing Off Hard
I was at a show jumping event and a little girl went up to a famous show jumper with her book of famous riders and asked him to sign it. She couldn’t find him in the book and asked if he could help her. He responded, “find it yourself” and walked away. In his final round worth $100,000, on the first jump, the horse stopped and he fell face-first into the floor. Not going to lie, I was laughing pretty hard.
29. Instant Karma!
I was walking to the store with a friend when we were 13. We heard someone yelling at us and turned around to see some kid about 50 feet away. He was yelling, calling us names, and every other homophobic insult you know at that age. As we started to walk over to confront him, he did a 180 and started running while turning. What happened next was so hilarious, it’s unforgettable.
He spun around and ran face-first into a tree and hit it hard enough that he fell to the ground from the impact. We couldn't stop laughing and hopefully, that was enough embarrassment for him to learn a lesson.
30. Flicking The Whip
When I was about 16, and my brother was 12, we lived on a ranch. We had horses, cats, dogs, and chickens. Because of the horses, we had this thing called a lunge whip. It's basically a long, flexible pole with a length of rope at the end. My brother and I were waiting for the horses to finish eating. Lil bro was dragging around the lunge whip, at first, to play with the cats.
But then, my brother starts snapping the whip near the cats, mostly to irritate me. I say: "Hey! Don't do that! Mom already said that you weren't supposed to, and if you accidentally hit one of them, I'll beat you up!" Lil bro looks me in the eyes and says, "I do what I want." He flicks the whip once more, and it snaps back and hits him right between the legs.
31. A Too-Hard Laugh
I was skiing at Breckinridge, and they have a T-bar tow lift. For those who don't know what that is, it’s basically a big upside-down 6-foot-tall upper case "T" which is pulled by a cable. You hold on and it slides you up the mountain. The T shape allows for two people to hold on to either side of the crook of the T shape.
People fall off of this all the time when they are not used to it, which gives locals a sense of superiority. Well one brave young boy, maybe 12-14 on a snowboard set out to handle the T-bar. He lost his footing about 30 seconds in but held on despite being dragged. This happens often, but usually for only a few seconds as most have good enough sense to let go.
Instead, this boy was dragged up more than a thousand feet on his stomach. I was behind him, as was another couple. We could not believe he was holding on. Well, the T-bar stopped further up for someone else, and he is too exhausted to stand up and fix his situation, but the couple behind him had been laughing so hard that when the T-bar abruptly started up again, they fell off. Bottom line is, he made it to the top and they did not.
32. Interrupting Jerk Who?
I was playing volleyball with a group of my friends a few years back. One of the guys who is just an acquaintance of mine was known for being unreasonably angry. Throughout the whole game, he’s being a total jerk to everyone, yelling and screaming, citing the rules, and saying everyone is breaking them. Eventually, we all had enough so we just unanimously kept egging him on and acting dumb on purpose to fluster him.
At one point, he gets so mad that he got on both his knees and started screaming. While he does this, a lone pigeon swoops by and takes a dump on his face. The rest of us laughed about it for weeks.
33. Stuck In The Intersection
A couple years ago, a friend and I were going to a concert and the traffic was beyond snarled. There was only one entrance into the location, and it was mucking up the traffic as you had to turn across a busy intersection. My friend thought that she could make it across, but someone coming from the other direction cut her off and made it so she was stopped in the intersection.
Cue some amazing jerk going from the light and screaming up to about an inch from the passenger side door. I really thought that he was going to hit us. He was screaming and flashing the finger and looked like he was going to get out of his car. My friend is freaking out and trying to inch her way into the stadium parking lot. But he was about to get what was coming to him.
Luckily, an officer had just wheeled up in time to see the jerk pull his stunt. He flashed his lights and angrily got out of his car and started yelling at the guy. As we finally got out of the intersection, he was writing him a ticket that included something to the effect of reckless driving. It made the night for us.
34. Wait, Don’t Go!
I put in excellent work at a software company for over a year and a half with no raises. I asked for a raise and got put on the ropes under an improvement plan. I passed the improvement plan easily. But then three months later, I found a new job that offered me a 25% raise on what I was currently making. Naturally, I handed in my two weeks’ notice to my current boss.
He counter-offered me a 25% raise plus a chance to work on any team I wanted within the company. I still turned that down. HR stopped me from working once they found out, since I was leaving for a competing company, but I still got paid for the two weeks. Essentially, it was a forced paid vacation. He was not happy about that considering I was somewhat in the middle of coding up a multimillion-dollar deal.
In the end, it was incredibly satisfying to have a boss that refused my raise request suddenly backpedal and try to keep me there with a bigger raise and extra incentives.
35. At The Last Second
My fiancée and I were employees at Pizza Hut. She was a waitress, and I was a cook. I had worked for them for five years and she had worked for them for two. Anyway, we were probably the best employees they had and knew what we were doing. Nevertheless, in the food business, managers come and go, some better than others.
So, we were both scheduled for a ridiculous shift of about ten and a half hours in that place, from open to eight that night, we would have been the only two employees there in our respected positions until five. Keep in mind this was a Sunday morning in the bible belt and a buffet day. Both she and I had a whole ton of work to do.
On top of that, they had steamed the carpets the night before and never set the tables and chairs back up in the lobby. We both only had a couple of hours to do our opening stuff which every minute counts. It wouldn’t have been that horrible—until our manager came in. So, what happens is that our manager gets breakfast, sits in a booth, and watches my fiancée and me put the lobby together, even though we were running so short on time.
My fiancée comes to me in tears saying she just wants to leave cause this day was completely messed up. We wait, the buffet is coming out of the oven, and at least a dozen people are walking in. We both just say screw it and leave, leaving him by himself to manage that stuff like he should. Do I feel bad? No, that was swift justice.
36. Unseated And Overthrown
I was in charge of a project that involved an outside vendor. The vendor sent in his own people to assist with the project, and one of the people they sent in was terrible at his job. He essentially had to do nothing, just sit in a room and monitor activity, but he was never in the room. So, I called the vendor and asked them not to send that guy in anymore.
They were fine with my request and never sent in that guy again. But then he was hired by MY company as my boss. He then went on a witch hunt, trying every dirty trick in the book to get me fired. Even though he was my direct boss, he couldn't do it directly because I was there longer and was well respected by the other managers who knew how valuable I was.
It took him a little longer, but eventually, he managed to build such a case of lies against me that he could get me fired. I went on to get an even more awesome job, and he was fired shortly after when they realized what a backstabber he was. Last I heard, he's still unemployed.
37. Close To The Curb
I was walking home from work one day. On my way, I have to cross a busy intersection. I was crossing on a green light, and someone pulled up to the corner intending to turn right. Without looking, she turned right in front of me. I was close enough that she nearly ran over my toes. The second after she turned, she saw me and flipped me off.
There was an officer a couple of cars behind her that saw the whole incident. He pulled her over and checked if I was okay before sending me on my way.
38. Watching The Traffic
My neighbor followed me down my driveway to yell at me for not coming to a “complete stop” at the stop sign. I apologized politely, even though I knew he was being petty as we live on a dead-end quiet street. He then proceeded to yell & curse at me as he backed out of my driveway. But karma was on my side that day. He backed into my tree, dented the whole side of his car, and ripped his mirror off.
He then proceeded to fly off down the road and didn’t brake for the stop sign.
I went with my girlfriend to the store so she could buy the same pair of boots for the third time. She had owned this style of boot for well over ten years. Unfortunately, they stopped making that particular type, and she was beside herself. I was very supportive and comforting, but I also happened to see a pair of boots in the sale bin that happened to fit, so I bought them.
She was happy for me because I didn't own a pair of boots, but I felt that I was sort of rubbing salt in her wound—we had gone in to get her something she loved, and we left with her feeling crushed and me getting an unexpected, sweet deal. A month later I went to a different store to buy the same pair of sneakers I had been buying over and over again—but the line had just been discontinued. And, in that store, something caught her eye. Payback!
40. Passing The Bill
I was out for dinner with my then-fiancée and her dad, my father-in-law. He's a bit of a jerk to her. He got divorced and re-married, loves those kids more than my wife, and gives her a tough time about way too many things. We're at the end of dinner, and my father-in-law offers to pay for the meal. Okay, that's nice. My wife asks to get her leftovers boxed and she'll take them home.
He starts with "Well, you'll just leave them in the fridge, then they'll just get thrown out, blah blah". Since she and I live together, I tell him "Listen, it's not your fridge, leave her alone". He gets all mad and says, "Don't tell me how to raise my daughter!" I reply, "Then don't speak to my fiancée that way!" He literally throws the bill and folder at me and says "FINE! YOU PAY THEN!" and storms out.
Now everyone is super mad and my fiancée is asking why I had to start something. So, I pay the bill and I'm just waiting for the receipt. We wait a whole 10 minutes here for the receipt. Tensions are rising, her dad is waiting outside, just building up steam and ready to freak out once we get out there. I ask the waiter, "Can I just get our bill and go?" He says, "Oh no sir, you have to wait for the manager". I was confused—and then I got the surprise of a lifetime.
It turns out they have a contest running where "every bill is a winner". Normally you'll win a free drink or appetizer with your next meal. Well, we won the GRAND PRIZE, a trip for four to Florida. Whoever pays gets the prize. Well, guess what? My father-in-law stormed out and got me to pay, so I got it!
41. Waterpark Scares
I was a lifeguard at a well-known chain of indoor waterpark hotels in the US and a woman was letting her less than two-year-old daughter play in the shallow end all by herself while she sat in a chair and read a magazine. I walked up to her to let her know that it was not safe for a child that young to be by herself, and the mom start yelling at me, telling me that it was not my business how she parented and to leave her alone.
At this point, everyone around her is staring. As soon as she finishes her rant, her daughter loses her balance and falls face-first into the water and is too young to know how to stand back up to get her face out of the water and breathe. I run in, grab her daughter, and bring it back to her. Everyone around who was staring began to clap.
42. Caught In The Act
Well, I have a younger sister, about to turn eight. She always wants me to play hide n' seek or some game with her and whenever I decline, she cooks up some awful plan that gets me in trouble. She got into the habit of making a loud noise and then crying and yelling saying I hit her. Well, I’d finally had enough. I turned my webcam on and started recording one day and she came in, faked getting hit, and then yelled for my mom.
You all should have seen the look on her face when I replayed the dirty lie she made over and over. The look on her face was priceless.
43. Mysterious Inner Workings
When I was 18, I was diagnosed with Hodgkin's lymphoma and had to undergo chemo and a few surgeries. That Christmas, there was a fellow in our town who put a Salvation Army jar in front of stores in his front yard. Every year he raises money this way and donates it to kids with cancer. A kid from our town decides it's a sweet idea to steal it and ends up getting caught soon after.
The very next year, he got diagnosed with cancer and had to do chemo and radiation. He even ended up on the Steve Wilkos show, apparently with his mommy crying about how his sister pilfered money from them when in need. I don't wish that nasty disease on anyone, but if there was one person who kinda asked for it, it was this kid.
44. Slipping On Ice
I worked at this Thai food place. Our back door led to the driveway of a house with gross redneck owners, whose four dogs pooped everywhere. We entered through the back door of the restaurant at the opening, and it sucked in the winter because you'd have to make your way down this sheet of ice. Anyway, my boss was an awful and mean jerk.
One evening, we arrived at the same time. He went down the ice hill before me and slipped, whacked his head hard, and came to a stop in a fresh pile of dog droppings. I did not even try to hide my laughter. Then I made my way down the ice hill. I also fell, pretty hard in fact, but didn’t land in anything gross like he did. But it was totally worth it.
45. Absolutely Useless!
I met this guy at the bus stop. He asked for my major, but the minute he learned I was majoring in visual arts, he started berating me saying it was a useless major and was going to end up homeless. I just ignored him and got on the bus. After a while, it becomes clear that there is a talent scout on the bus as a man is talking loudly on the phone about recent contracts.
The guy I met at the bus stop started pulling out a CD player and insisted that the talent scout listen to his Elton John impression. the talent scout guy was impressed and a bit incredulous. That’s when I made a hilarious realization. It turns out the guy had mixed up his CDs and had him listen to an actual Elton John album.
I never saw someone slouch back in their seat with such shame and embarrassment. It made my day.
46. Proving My Point
This was when I was in high school. One really arrogant girl was going to prove the Bible was fiction to our class. She comes in with a bible, says she is going to prove to everyone that it's not real, and slams it down on her desk. She sits. I kid you not, the desk immediately collapses underneath her, and she falls to the ground. God might not be real, but karma certainly is.
This was around middle school or high school. I don’t remember, but this kid was at a haunted house with his parents. They ended up at this room which was done up like a cell with a disgusting creature-man thing in it. The kid, chest puffed out and all, says “Hey, whatcha in for?” obviously showing off. Creature-man quips back immediately, “You’ll find out”, and the kid laughs and continues through the room.
As soon as the kid’s back is to him, creature-man spreads the bars of the cell apart, takes a chain, and slams it right next to the kid, who, to everyone’s pleasure, runs down the hall screaming. Everyone shares a laugh, continues on, and we see the kid with his head out the window telling his parents: “Hold on one minute, I need some fresh air”.
48. Being Principled
I worked as a database administrator for a community center for one summer in university. Basically, I created a database for them to track who was donating to them and how much they were donating, and who was volunteering at the center, and for how many hours. It was quite simple to work and despite being the youngest person on staff by about 25-30 years, I got along well with all of my co-workers—except for my immediate boss.
The next spring, I was applying for jobs and e-mailed my old boss to ask for a letter of recommendation. Her reply was infuriating. Much to my surprise, she told me that she didn't write recommendation letters "out of principle". I was pretty mad about it because I was finding it difficult to find a position, and not being able to count on my most recent employer for a reference was a definite blemish on my resume.
However, in spite of this, I managed to land a decent job. Lo and behold, my old boss e-mails me on day one of my new job, begging me to come in because she had somehow ignored all the warnings in the user documentation I wrote and moved some files around rendering it impossible for her to access the database. I began to realize it was my chance for payback.
She asked if I would come in and I e-mailed her back and told her I already had a job and couldn't do it "out of principle".
49. Taking The Fall
I worked at a grocery store once, and I was stocking instant noodles on a big sale display. All I had was a cheap small step stool, you know the one with the bar that runs across the top step? Reaching down to the stool from the shelf I was standing on was about three feet. There was like a 60 percent chance my foot would land on the top bar and collapse the thing.
I asked a co-worker to use his shoulder as a handle as I got down. My supervisor called me a “princess” for getting assistance. Soon after, he was stocking the two-liter Coke bottles on a sales display. He tried to get down. He took the 40% success rate jump onto the step. Big mistake. He hit the top bar, the step ladder collapsed, he broke his arm, and took down half of the display.
I just clocked out and left before they told me to clean up the spilled soda all over the place.
50. A Case Of Road Rage!
My stepdad is a driving instructor, and I went to get my license pretty late. one day he was giving me a lesson and we were going over one of the possible courses that the test takes. While we're driving down a street in the suburbs a guy is tailgating me like crazy. He was a real tough-looking guy and had a sideways hat and all.
Every time I come to a stop sign, I do a full stop, obviously, and he throws his hands in the air and yells. It's starting to stress me out, but my stepdad had a plan the whole time. He says to me, "Don't worry about it, just watch". As we're going down the street, he says "OK, now in about 50 feet, I want you to start slowing down a little bit and right when you are in front of that school zone, pull over to the right".
So, I do it, right after I pull over, the guy who is really annoyed at me now, takes off like a shot. Only about five seconds later, an officer steps out from behind a tree and waves him over for going probably double the speed limit in a school zone. We laughed. Hard.