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Justice Is Served: The Most Satisfying “Instant Karma” Stories

Penelope Singh

Sometimes, it takes almost no time at all for karma to come crashing down with one satisfying blow, and these people witnessed those moments firsthand. If you’re having a bad day, read on to experience some sweet, sweet justice.


1. Winning The Breakup

My ex-fiancé, who was studying to be a doctor, proposed to me on New Year’s Day and started cheating on me five days later with multiple women for about a year. We broke up as soon as I found out. This was about four years ago. My parents ran into his parents recently and it turns out he’s gained about 50 lbs, dropped out of school, and now works at a Mattress Firm.

2. Home Sweet Home

I live in a college town. My roomies and I planned to throw a rager on my birthday. When we finished setting up, we started playing music and drinking. It was around 11 pm and there were maybe 20 people already in attendance. The party was slowly gaining life…but then we heard knocks on the door and saw flashlights through the blinds. We immediately got chills up our spines.

I knew there were uniformed officers at the door, but I thought to myself that it was way too early for them to be busting us, so I went outside to talk to them just to make sure. As I opened the door, there were two officers standing there…and my neighbor. Everyone inside immediately left as one of the officers is wrote me a ticket. The neighbor approached me, saying that we couldn’t be holding these types of parties because he has kids.

I was angry, but there was nothing I could do—the party was over, and I would have to go to court to contest the ticket. But the best part was yet to come. A couple of months later, my roommate ran into me with a worried look on his face. He said, “You have to come outside right now!” I asked him what was going on, but he didn’t tell me.

I went outside and there were officers everywhere. They were in the alley hiding behind sheds and dumpsters. I went to the front of the house and there was a huge black vehicle that looked like a tank. The street was closed off and I was pretty freaked out at this point because I didn’t know what was going on. I soon found out, though.

Guys in full camo armor busted into my neighbor’s house and dragged him out. Apparently, they had a search warrant because he was selling substances right from his house…where he had his kids. That’s karma.

Elbroyo

3. The Tables Have Turned

I had a “friend” in high school who would constantly tell me to off myself. She would spread horrible rumors about me and demonize me in the hallways. This girl was the typical cheerleader type girl who got everything she wanted, so I guess that’s why she always acted like she was better than me. Fast forward a few years and I moved out to LA for an awesome job after I graduated college.

She contacted me, asking if I would talk to my boss to see if I could get her a job since it was also her dream job. It may sound petty, but it was so nice to know that for once she wasn’t going to get everything she wanted. She had treated me so badly, and then years later she really thought I would help her out. I didn’t.

Throwaway523942934

4. One For The Burn Book

On my way home from work, I stopped at a grocery store to get something to eat. At the time, I was wearing a really ratty and torn hoodie that I usually wore to work all the time. In front of me in line were two pretty girls. They were talking trash about the cashier and they weren’t trying to hide it, either. At some point, of them turned to me, looked me up and down, and nudged her friend.

Pointing towards me, she said one of the rudest things I’ve ever heard. “Looks like someone can’t afford nice things.” I looked her right in the face and in my most sincere voice said, “My dad gave me this sweatshirt the winter before he passed.” The girl looked horrified and immediately began to cry. I just walked away and got into another line.

90lb_Balls

5. The Ultimate Revenge

I used to play frisbee in a parking lot on Saturday nights and people would often drive their cars through to mess with us on a regular basis. One night, a guy drove his car up to the edge of the area where we were playing and started revving his engine really aggressively. We ended the point and cleared the area to give him space. The dude then dropped the clutch and sped through the parking lot…but he missed one crucial detail.

He failed to notice the raised median in his path. He hit it while going pretty fast and totally wrecked the underside of his car. He came to a stop, then went out to check the damage—it was clearly leaking a lot of fluid. Then, the cherry on top. An officer who was just hanging out in a different part of the shopping area saw the whole thing go down, so he cruised up on the dude with his lights flashing. We went back to playing.

aisle5

6. Goodbye, Nurse!

I work at a residential facility for individuals with developmental disabilities. The other day, I was punching out after working an overnight shift and I heard the nurse who administers medication screaming at staff over something relatively minor in front of the residents while they were eating breakfast. I shrugged it off and proceeded to go across the street to another house because I had to hand in some paperwork.

The same nurse then came into the same house and began administering medications. The second she stepped in, however, a resident ran up to her and punched her in the face. So satisfying.

Permalink

7. White Out Wipe Out

Last year, I got caught in an ice storm while driving. It was warm outside one moment and within a few minutes, everything was covered in ice. My dad was supposed to be leaving his house to drive his RV, so I called to warn him not to leave while I continued to drive five miles per hour on the rumble strips to the next exit.

There were cars wrecked all over the road. It looked like a scene from a horror movie. I was afraid to pull over and help anyone for fear of getting stuck myself…or worse, getting rear-ended by an out-of-control vehicle. I quickly ended the call with my dad because talking on the phone and driving was dangerous, to begin with, but also because there were two cars coming up behind me going about 60 mph.

Apparently, they were both oblivious to the dozens of wrecked automobiles on the side of the road. I had just finished telling my dad “I have to get off the phone, people are driving like idiots” when the two cars passed me and then slammed into each other, skittering off to the side of the road. I felt like a jerk, but I kept driving.

I did see two guys get out shaking their fists as I was driving by, so I assume they were okay.

allcowards

8. Twice As Nice

I was checking a guy’s groceries out and when I finished, he realized he forgot his wallet in the truck. It happens, no big deal. But the woman behind him was really impatient. She was just extremely rude to him the entire time. He eventually came back, paid for his stuff, and left. At that point, I started checking the woman’s groceries out.

That’s when she had an embarrassing realization. She forgot her debit card in her vehicle, too. She went out to get it, but she couldn’t find her keys. She locked her keys and card in her van.

mynameisnotjacob

9. Park It, Lady

I was in a line to pay for parking and had my kids with me. It was my turn to pay, but this woman cut in front of me, making a poor attempt to pretend she didn’t see me. Well, the machine swallowed her ticket and threw up a “wait for assistance” message. By the time I went to a different machine, paid my ticket, bundled the kids into the car, and drove out of the parking lot, I could see that the witch was still waiting for assistance.

teaqualizer

10. Stings, Doesn’t It?

My husband of seven years cheated on me and admitted it when I asked. The next morning, he was mowing the lawn and ran over a beehive with the mower. He is allergic to bees. I had to take him to the hospital all blown up like a big puffy sack of trash.

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11. The Rules Of The Road

I was driving home from dinner with my wife one night and we got off the freeway at our exit. At the bottom of the ramp is a two-lane stoplight, so you can go left or right, and just to the left is the freeway entrance. This dude behind us had been tailgating for miles, and I grumbled when he did it all the way down the exit ramp and nearly rear-ended me as we stopped for the light.

Then he decided the light was taking too long, so he pulled into the right-hand turn lane next to us and made a U-turn to go around back towards the freeway entrance, while the light was still red. My jaw dropped. Turns out, I didn’t have to wait long for sweet, sweet justice. JUST as he completed his U-turn, the car that had been behind him pulled around in a similar fashion…with red and blue lights flaring up to illuminate the intersection.

And to top it all off, the officer lit up his speaker with, “THAT WAS REALLY STUPID. PULLOVER NOW.” The idiot was just pulling into the shoulder as we merrily turned left on the green light and headed for home.

castillar

12. Trashing The Joint

When my dad was in college, he lived in a dormitory that had around 15 floors. There was this dude, we’ll call him Chester, who lived in the center apartment on the 14th floor, facing the north side. This meant that Chester’s window was located directly above the entrance to the dormitory. Important detail: Chester was a jerk.

Chester would come home from school and wind down by throwing water balloons at the people walking into the building. They weren’t even people he particularly hated or anything. Chester just did this to everyone for fun. One day, he hit my dad. That was a big mistake. My dad and his friend retaliated by bringing a garbage can up 15 flights of stairs to fill with water in the bathroom.

They then headed up to his friend’s dorm, which happened to be the center room on the 15th floor, right above Chester’s. When a couple of girls walked up the steps to the door, Chester leaned out of his window, about to throw the balloons. That’s when my dad promptly hit him with an entire garbage can of water.

tropiusking

13. For The Birds

I was sitting at a stoplight, watching as two preppy girls from the university chased pigeons off the sidewalk. They flew up and landed a few feet further every time. As they approached the intersection, one of the girls squealed and ran right at them. As they took flight in the same direction, a bus drove by at full speed, probably 35 to 40 mph.

Two of the pigeons didn’t make it in time and instantly transformed into a cloud of feathers and smaller pigeon pieces. Then I heard the blood-curling scream. “They’re ON me! THEY’RE ON ME!” The girl was COVERED in pigeon guts and feathers, and she was completely losing her mind. Her friend was doubled over in laughter. I don’t think she’ll be tormenting pigeons ever again.

NorthwestGiraffe

14. To The Left

Ahh, instant karma is delicious. I had to use a four-lane road to commute to and from work. There was an intersection where I would always get the red light. During rush hour, I’d have to wait through a few cycles before I could get through the intersection, mainly because the left lane didn’t get a green arrow to turn and it would cause a backup.

One day, I was waiting for my turn to get through this intersection. It was a nice day, so I had the window open. Two guys pulled up in the next lane. There was a lot of traffic that day, so for three light cycles, these guys starting talking major trash to me. Just really sexist things. Ignoring them did not dissuade them, so I eventually talked a little trash back.

Finally, it was my turn to go through the intersection. Traffic started to unwind, and I began to take off. The guys in the next lane also took off, keeping up with me so they could scream even more crazy stuff at me. The problem was, the car in front of their lane was taking a left and their lane was not moving. I took off right as they rear-ended the brand new Jaguar in front of them.

The best part was the super loud Nelson Muntz “HAHA” I let out at them when they hit that car. It still makes me laugh every time I think about it.

claudial12

15. Snow Day

I lived in Illinois for a while. One day, there was a snowstorm. I was in the left lane doing about 30 in a 55 because the roads were that bad. I had someone doing about the same speed right next to me in the right lane. Behind us, there was a woman in a small SUV bouncing from lane to lane and honking her horn.

As we came to a red light, the guy next to me turned right and the woman from behind proceeded to pull up next to me. She rolled down her window and started yelling at me. I lowered my window and heard her say, “If you don’t know how to drive in the snow, get the heck off the road, some of us have places to go!” The light then turned green and she sped off as fast as she could.

She got up to speed, and as she approached the next red light, she hit her brakes and slid on the snow…right into the car in front of her. I stopped and went right up to her window and asked if she was OK. She nodded her head, and while she was dazed, I said the most epic thing I could have ever said: “If you don’t know how to drive in the snow, get the heck off the road.”

There is a lesson in that story: Four-wheel drive only helps you move forward, not stop or turn.

axelbuddy042187

16. Slip And Slide

I was at a water park with my brother, and we were like 24 and 25 at the time. When we got to the bottom of this one slide, there was this girl in front of us who was a total witch. She took one look at the kid working there and started making fun of him. Before I could say anything to her, she turned around faceplanted onto the wet concrete.

I looked at my brother and we just burst out laughing. And THAT is justice, ladies and gents.

Estrezas

17. Now You’re Cooking With Gas

I work at a gas station. At the time of this incident, the prices had just been raised by 15 cents. About five minutes after the price change, a guy pulled in, parked, then walked inside. He started yelling at me, saying, “Gas Buddy says it’s a different price.” I tried to explain to him that we had just changed it and it should be reflected on the website shortly. Well, he was not having any of that.

He called me an idiot and then stormed out the door. He got into his car and proceeded to back out. As he sped away, he got T-boned by another car. It was great giving my statement to the officers while he watched.

Big_als

18. Saved By The Soup

I was once at a friend’s house. His mom was dating this jerk at the time and he had major anger issues. I was infamous for cooking at the house and making a big mess…but since I was 11 and his mom was rarely home, it was a regular thing I did. In this one instance, my friend was upstairs in the bathroom while I was making soup. Just as his mom’s boyfriend walked in, I picked up the soup pot, and the handle cracked right off.

The pot fell with a clang and a buttload of split soup flooded the kitchen. That’s when it turned completely bizarre. The boyfriend lowered his head and starts charging at me like a bull. I was terrified. This was the only time an adult had ever tried to attack me. He took about one and a half running steps towards me before I heard: “SQUEEEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAEEEEEEEEEK!”

Down went goes, butt-first, right into the huge puddle of soup. He slid a couple more feet until his head hit the side of some floor-level cabinets. I kind of leaped over him and jetted up to my friend’s room, locking the door.

minotaurbranch

19. Timing Is Everything

I’ve worked at the same company for over six years. I was a good, loyal employee with a perfect track record. Over the six years, I’d only called in sick twice. I had the best results, as well as the least amount of errors on paperwork in the whole region. Well, my new boss decided that that wasn’t enough.

He minimized my hours, expanded my workload, and never had anything nice to say. He seemed to think ruling with an iron fist is the way to go about his job. Even after all this, I kept my head above water, fixing his errors along the way. Then, one day, I decided I had enough and resigned from my position with immediate effect. Turns out, that was actually the best revenge.

My departure ended up throwing a wrench in his operations, and I timed it exactly so that it will ruin his vacation plans for next week. On top of that, there was no one to fill my position. As soon as I mouthed the words, “I quit,” you could see the terror in his eyes. He realized how screwed he was without me and he tried to do whatever he could to keep me for at least another week.

I’ve never felt such a sense of instant karma as today.

barrygibb

20. The Wrath Of Karma

This story is as instant as instant karma can get. I go to New York City about once a year to visit family. While there, I always crave the “Grandma’s Sicilian” pizza, and the best slice in the city is served near my cousin’s place. Well, it’s NYC, so naturally the joint is crowded as heck with a bunch of different people.

Across from the register, you can buy drinks, and payment is made via an honor system. The cashier can see you take a drink, but 90% of the time, they are occupied with a customer. I’ve never really stolen before, but my cousin just nonchalantly took a drink and nobody said a word!

I do love me some Peach Snapple, so I got greedy and took two of them. I paid for the food and we were on our way out. At that point, the adrenaline was pumping through my veins. Did I mention my craving for the pizza was so large that I got an entire pizza instead of just one or two slices? Yep, an entire pie for myself. I felt on top of the world—until I walked back to the train station. That’s when karma hit me.

I tripped on the curb and fell, landing on the pizza and covering my clothes in the sauce. Both of the Snapple bottles shattered, and the glass lodges itself into my knuckles, palms, and legs. The brand new $60 jeans I purchased the day before at Express got ripped by the glass. Despite cleaning the wounds properly, my hand still became infected that night. Suffice to say I haven’t stolen anything since.

alexisaacs

21. Self Burn, Those Are Rare

The other day, I was taking my dog for a walk around the neighborhood. She squatted down to take a poop and I reached for my doggie bags, only to realize I was fresh out. So I peeked around, making sure nobody was looking, and I just left it. 10 minutes later, I was walking across the road and I cut through a thin grass median in the center.

That’s when I stepped in dog poop. I wasn’t even mad. I knew I deserved it.

huskyinfantry

22. Foot In Mouth

I was at a party one time and this one girl couldn’t stop talking trash about this other girl who was coming to the party. When the other girl showed up, this dude picked her up and hugged her. He spun her around in and by complete accident, the girl’s swinging leg made contact with the trash talker’s face as she was sitting on the couch. Her drink spilled all over and she got a black eye.

Bigbodypresence

23. Drive Me Crazy

I was sitting on a highway late at night because of a bad car accident. The highway was packed and barely moving. Well, one guy thought he was smarter than everyone else and tried to drive on the shoulder. He made it a good distance before running into an on-ramp, which was also packed with cars. He had nowhere to go, and no one let him in.

He was stuck between cars in the right-most lane and cars from the on-ramp. Everyone was bumper-to-bumper and flowed around him. I went from watching him pass me and almost getting out of my view to losing sight of him in my rearview.

Curmud6e0n

24. A Sign From Above

My ex-wife cheated on me with my good friend. Apparently, they regularly met at his house. I was stupid because I would regularly pick her up from there. When I found out the news, I left and she moved in with him. A few weeks later, a tornado ripped through the countryside, hitting their love shack and destroying the home.

jimmysbars

25. Mind Your Manners

This happened to me at work. One of my customers was trying to pay with a thousand coins for a $5 scratch-off. She told me she was only 10 cents short. She ended up being over a dollar short, then complained when I didn’t give her the scratch-off. She went off on me, saying that any decent person would have spotted her the money. I pretty much told her she could go down the street and try her luck there instead.

All of a sudden, she pulled out a 20-dollar bill and bought two tickets. As she walked out of the store, she said to me, “Karma is a witch.” Then, she proceeded to go to her car. That’s when an officer pulled up behind her and blocked her in. They proceeded to search her car and detain and her boyfriend. It was hilarious. Turns out, she was right: Karma is a witch.

ChosenBearded

26. Keep Your Mouth Shut

Last Saturday, I was on a crowded NYC subway at 2 am. Two dudes in their early 20s had an open bottle and were walking around, flaunting it. The whole train ignored them, but they kept parading around being a bunch of morons. They spotted two taller, athletic-looking dudes and started making fun of them for “looking like officers.” Then they said something that sealed their fate. 

“Which one of you is the sergeant?” They looked at each other, smiled, reached into their pocket,s and pulled out their badges. “Okay boys, empty your pockets.” The subway blew up in laughter…they would have gotten away with EVERYTHING if they just didn’t go bother the two plain-clothes officers. Score one for the good guys!

patricio12345

27. Sharing Is Caring

I’m from San Diego and during the summer, you have to claim bonfire pits on the beach really early in the morning if you want one for the night. My friends and I got to the beach at 8 am and stayed there so we could get a bonfire going into the night. Just before sundown, this one couple asked if they could share the bonfire with us.

Since our group wasn’t too big, we let them join us. However, that couple proceeded to bring a group of like 15 others and they literally surrounded the pit, pushing us out. We were angry, but we were so tired from being at the beach all day that we just decided to head out. Little did we know what was coming next. 

That night, there was a high tide warning, and when we moved all of our stuff over the wall that divided the beach walk from the beach, a huge wave came in and washed out that whole group. The wave flipped over their table of food, took a handful of sandals back into the ocean, and destroyed all their stuff.

The best part was this one girl was trying to jump the wall to save herself but she didn’t jump high enough and ended up falling right back into the waters. Karma’s a witch.

5hunned

28. Pick On Somebody Your Own Size

I was working in a pub in Liverpool and had just arrived for my shift at about 10 am. I knocked on the door and waited for someone to let me in. That’s when I heard the sound of some voices shouting. I turned around to see two guys with their shirts off swaggering towards me and talking to me in a language I didn’t understand.

They came right up to me and, with what little English they did know, they called me a bunch of nasty slurs. I was knocking on the door really hard at this point, but after insulting me, they left me alone and proceeded to walk off towards a busy road, laughing. I kept an eye on them as they walked out into the traffic, waving their arms at the cars to stop for them and giving the drivers the finger when they didn’t.

Suddenly, one of the cars actually did stop and four big guys got out. One of the nasty dudes ran off, but the “big man” got caught up to him and shoved him, hard, against the car a couple of times, clearly hurting his head and elbow. Then, another one of the big guys drew his fist far back, clearly about to punch the other misfit. The little jerk covered his face and screamed.

They didn’t get hit, but a bunch of passerbys started laughing. They let him go and he ran away. That felt good.

Tang_Fan

29. Bowling For Dollars

I worked as a bartender at a bowling alley. For some reason, one of the other bartenders hated me. She was constantly poaching customers from me and never split our tips fairly. She even tried to get the scheduling manager to put her on the days I would be working, just to be a jerk.

One of my regulars also said she caught her pocketing tips and not putting them in our communal bucket while I was working with her. And then tournament season started. People either dreaded it or looked forward to it. It sucked because shifts were twice or three times as long as normal and there was a constant rush of people at the bar, but that also meant we’d make as much in a day as we did in a week.

Well, during the first tournament, she “claimed” a bunch of teams since they were bowling on her side. Apparently, she knew them well and was looking forward to their tournament tips. She came in, saw that I was scheduled to bartend that day, and she flipped right out. She started ranting to the manager—but she had made a fatal mistake. 

The owner of the place happened to be standing right there. The owner pretty much said I was one of the better bartenders, so I was getting put on the tournaments, and if she didn’t like it she could just leave. So she did…and then I got to work her normal shifts as well.

Diredoe

30. Words Of Wisdom

My old manager was a monster. He belittled people, made the work environment hostile, and denied anything that would make his workers happy while giving himself every comfort. He even denied me my request to take a half-day so I could go to my mother’s funeral. He said, “Would it be a big deal if you couldn’t go?” It was horrible, but eventually, he got what was coming to him in the best way.

One day, he wrote up a fictitious counseling statement about one of my co-workers and the entire office revolted. The manager wasn’t fired as we wanted, but he was “relieved” from his duties. A new manager came shortly after to fill in his position—he was very well regarded, a former 20-year Air Force veteran, and an overall humble guy who actually knew how to handle people. We had our first awkward team meeting, with the old manager bitterly in attendance.

As the new manager was giving his introductory speech, he saw the old manager glaring around the table, still trying to intimidate people. He stops talking, paused for a few seconds, then said, “You know, when I was in the Air Force, I learned that if you take care of your people, they’ll take care of you.” He then stared directly at the old manager and said, “And if you don’t take care of your people, they’ll take care of you.”

BurtGummer938

31. The Destroyer Of Jerks

This is one of my favorite stories to tell. I went to a small school of about 80 students, and in my class, there were only 12 people. Although our numbers were small, we still had jerks who made everyone’s lives miserable. In our case, that bully was Christopher. Christopher was one of those kids who felt like he could do whatever he wanted to anyone else.

He also thought he would be absolved of all blame if he finished his routine with, “It’s just a joke.” Basically, he was a grade-A jerk. There was also a mentally challenged kid in our class. Let’s call him Todd. Now, Todd was a curious guy and he was fond of asking questions. It was just his own way of obtaining information. I know this might sound bad, but we were often annoyed with him.

Nevertheless, we still all looked after him and made sure nobody gave him trouble. He was one of us, and that lent him some protection. The karmic incident took place once when we were the seniors. We basically ruled the school, and naturally, this power would go to our heads.

It corrupted nobody quite as much as it did Christopher. We were playing baseball one day, practicing for an upcoming competition. We split up into two teams and made plays with each other. I was kind of mad because Todd was on my team, as he wasn’t the most athletically gifted. Picture Kermit The Frog trying to run the 110-meter hurdles.

We were losing, due in no small part to the other team’s superior members. I had lost interest, and only gave lackluster hits when it was my turn. Then it was Todd’s turn. I watched him bat, just to see how it would go. Christopher was pitching the ball and he wasn’t even giving Todd a chance. He’d throw the ball at his feet, then burst out laughing with his team.

Babe Ruth couldn’t have done a darn thing with those kinds of throws. It went on for three whole minutes. Eventually, his own team got sick of him and told him to give a decent throw so Todd could strikeout and the game could progress. When he threw it, and Todd braced himself. We’re all watching by now.

As the ball drew closer, the most incredible thing happened. WHACK. Todd didn’t just hit the ball with the bat, he annihilated it. The bang was heard all over the school. So what does a ball do when it’s met with a force like that? I don’t know for sure, but in this case, it went back towards Christopher at Mach speed.

I didn’t even see the ball on its way back. It was like a bullet from a pistol. When it got to Christopher, it hit him squarely in the eye. He fell down and got knocked out cold. One of his friends helped him inside, while the rest of us cheered and laughed. We lifted Todd on our shoulders and gave him a hero’s cheer. He was no longer just Todd. He was Todd, the destroyer of jerks.

dannymation

32. A Busload Of Trouble

This happened a few years ago. I used to live a street or two behind a central suburban bus stop on top of a big hill. I would take the bus every day to college, which was about an hour’s bus ride away. One morning, I got on the bus and it pulled up to the intersection, waiting at a red light.

When the light turned green, it started pulling out. All of a sudden, this primped-up, snooty, middle-aged woman in a red suit (I still remember the details because it made me so mad) FLEW right through her red light in her huge silver Cadillac, going the same way that the bus was turning. The bus driver had to slam on the brakes quite suddenly and then honked at the woman.

The woman then FLIPPED THE BUS DRIVER OFF and kept speeding. The bus driver cursed and carried on. But that wasn’t the end of the story. When we later made our way to the bottom of the hill, we saw that a couple of officers had pulled over a silver Cadillac into the cross street. They were issuing her a ticket.

The bus driver saw it and said, “Oh yeah, baby!” He pulled the bus over to the sidewalk near where the intersection was and flagged down one of the officers. The bus driver asked him if she had been caught speeding, and the cop confirmed. Then, the bus driver told him, “She also just ran a red light.”

The cop said, “Well, we will add that to her ticket—would you be willing to come in as a witness in court for that?” The bus driver replied, “HONEY, I GET PAID TO GO TO COURT FOR STUFF LIKE THIS. IT’D BE MY PLEASURE.” And the whole bus started clapping. It was such a good day. You always dream about nailing people like that.

Seminary_Student

33. I Fought The Law

I was working at a mental health facility for the elderly as a nurse. I worked there for over a year with a perfect work record. At some point, my co-worker found out I have PTSD and decided to tell my boss. After that, the two of them hung out a lot together, plotting to have me committed. One day, they launched their attack. During one of my shifts, my boss called me into her office to congratulate me on my one year of service. When we were in her office alone, she started grilling me about my mental health and how it played out at home. That’s when things made a turn for the worst. 

The next thing I knew, she forced me to go to the psych emergency ward because I have PTSD. The entire meeting was designed to trigger me enough to behave poorly. Somehow, they wanted to rationalize the next step, which was to cart me off to emergency and have them lock me away in a padded room.

They didn’t though. The hospital said I was fine; just stressed out about being forced to go to the hospital like a crazy person for no reason other than admitting I had PTSD. After the hospital let me go, my boss put me on extended medical leave without telling me and ignored all my calls for two weeks. She then wrote letters lying about me to her bosses and the HR dept.

I filed a union grievance and a complaint with a third-party whistleblower company. My boss lied about me to everyone. She said I told her I was standing in front of mirrors with knives, wanting to cut flesh. They believed her, so they shut down my complaints. I took it to the human rights tribunal.

Well, I won. It took three long years and it was the hardest thing I have ever done, but it was well worth it. My boss’s health declined considerably by the time the trial happened. She lost her job, she had to move, and there is a public record about what she did that will forever remain. The co-worker who helped my boss is also on the permanent record at the company.

She will never be comfortable at that job site again, and what she did is known to all. I got the highest amount awarded for damages. I created a precedent for other persons with PTSD with a clean work history who do a good job on the clock but have very real struggles with symptoms at home. No karma could possibly taste better than $40k and a clear reputation.

sowhatnoweh

34. Dance It Out

We had a dance unit in my seventh-grade gym class. The teachers decided that it was a good idea for everyone to do Tae-Bo. My middle school ran like Mean Girls—Many people held grudges for things that had occurred in the previous year. Old elementary school football rivalries were present. The nerdy kids loathed the jocks.

The popular girls were often angry because of rumors that were going around at the time. The girls in smaller cliques secretly envied each other. The lowest members of the middle school social caste system had it out for the bullies. It was chaos just waiting to explode—and it did explode…as 200 of us were crowded into the gym.

On a massive screen, Billy Banks’ Tae-Bo DVD was playing. At first, the Tae-Bo exercise was relatively civil, but there were those kids who were just being jerks; kneeing people in the back, punching shoulders, etc. Attitudes then shifted. You could feel the heat of the victims’ anger and the testosterone levels skyrocketing.

Suddenly, a few of the unpopular kids realized that gym class was requiring them to hit and kick. Their tormenters were getting away with using Tae-Bo as an excuse to be jerks, and they figured they shouldn’t be the only ones to play that game. Perhaps, this time, they could evade the no-tolerance policy and get away with dishing out some vengeance.

Without warning, the entire gym erupted into a flurry of fists and flying feet. Girls who had been the verbal punching bag of their cliques started pulling hair and swiping at faces. Kids who had been bullied day after day started dishing out black eyes like it was nobody’s business. The sudden attacks literally spread like wildfire.

The kids at the top of the social hierarchy were taken completely by surprise as the tables had turned and some even bolted for the doors. The gym teachers tried to stop the epic battle, but there were only six of them. Eventually, school security showed up to break up the fight. No one was formally punished that day, as you couldn’t exactly punish 200 kids.

Injuries ranged from bruises to broken teeth. Essentially, the middle school version of a peasant rebellion occurred, and the nobility got their butts kicked. Unfortunately, the issues were not cleared up in a single battle. Alliances only strengthened and the neutral took sides, which led up to the great Twitter conflict which has, as far as I know, remained unresolved.

YsabelMystic

35. Oh What A Night

Last spring, I didn’t get a date for the junior prom. I wasn’t thrilled, but I figured I’d go stag. I found the perfect dress and was actually really excited. Then, my group of friends said I couldn’t come with them. Their reason chilled me to the bone. They told me that since I didn’t have a date, it would “ruin the pictures.”

And since I wasn’t going to be in the pictures, they said it just be so awkward for me to get ready with them beforehand. “Wouldn’t it just be so uncomfortable being the only one in the limo with no boyfriend?” they added. “And what would you do afterward?” I mean, everyone knows what happens at the parties after prom.

So I didn’t go at all. But guess who’s limo never showed up?

Permalink

36. Fire It Up

This is from my younger years. A friend of mine had a cousin who was visiting for Victoria Day in Canada. When I went to visit him, I was told he was in the backyard. I went back there and he was with his cousin setting off firecrackers. They had a big bowl of loose firecrackers. When I asked if I can set a couple off as well, they both just started tossing lit firecrackers at me while laughing.

I figured that they were both acting like greedy jerks, so I decided to leave. Just as I’m about to, however, a spark got into the bowl. The entire bowl of firecrackers ignited, leaving only a few unexploded. This lasted for about 10 or 15 seconds. The stunned look on their faces was so satisfying. I started laughing at them.

I’m sure they planned a whole afternoon of setting them off.

prembroke529

37. I’m With The Band

Not my story, but my mom’s. Apparently, when she was young, there was a girl at her school who was always a major witch to her. She hated my mom for whatever reason and always made fun of her. Fast forward to my mom as a college-aged woman—somehow, she managed to land a relationship with the guitarist from Bob Marley’s band. One day, she was out at a bar with him getting drinks.

The dude went to the bathroom and her bully from back in the day came up to my mom, saying, “Oh my God, did you see who is here?!” At that moment, the dude came back and put his arm around my mom. “Hey babe, what’s happening?” he said. She said the look on that girl’s face was priceless. Don’t you just dream of a moment like that?

echo_lo

38. Don’t Put Your Eggs In One Basket

On a backpacking trip around Greece, I had a bad experience in a hotel and decided to take one of their beautifully-painted stone eggs from the bowl in the reception as compensation. When we were on the ferry to the next island, I started noticing a horrible smell coming from my bag. It turns out that it was not a stone egg at all, but a painted boiled egg that had broken in my bag.

The whole thing had become so rotten that it had turned a nice shade of green, and the smell was almost intolerable. I had to borrow a lot of my friend’s clothes for the rest of the trip, but at least it taught me a good lesson.

JD3313

39. Taking It To Heart

I work in an ER and an ambulance once brought a girl in after a man had attacked her. She was walking down the street when some guy tackled her to the ground and tried to drag her down an alley. A good samaritan managed to chase him off and call the authorities. But this had an even better ending. About 20 minutes later, they brought in a guy in full cardiac arrest.

Turns out, the officer found the attacker and chased him several blocks when he collapsed and his heart gave out. He was already dead on arrival, and the victim IDed him right there in the ER.

velvetseahorse

40. When It Rains, It Pours

I had a moron driver in a Porsche convertible tailgating me on a six-lane highway. I wasn’t in the far right lane, but I was in the middle so he still could have passed if he wanted to. At one point, he finally passed me and honked his horn as he did. As we got on the Chesapeake Bay Bridge, it immediately started torrentially pouring.

There was nowhere for him to stop, so he had to drive a several-mile-long bridge with his top down the whole way.

wikid_one

41. Justice Is Served

I was in daycare as a child. At the time, I had very long hair that my dad always put into a ponytail. There was a girl there who would pull on my ponytail all the time. We were playing musical chairs at the end of one day while waiting for our parents to pick us up. The girl was behind me and kept yanking my ponytail, even though I kept telling her to stop.

The teacher apparently “didn’t see anything,” so she did nothing about it. There were a bunch of parents waiting for us to finish our game, my mom included. The girl kept doing it and the teacher kept not seeing it, so I knew what I had to do. I turned around and punched the girl as hard as I could. She stumbled into the “cubbies” where we kept our coats.

The teacher tried to chastise me, and my mom was like “Nope. I didn’t see anything.” I didn’t even get in trouble.

vanessow

42. Flaunt It If You Got It

A number of years ago, my then-boyfriend and I were at our local dive bar having a few beers as usual. All was good until this petite chick with a rocking body strolled in and very blatantly flaunted her stuff to every guy there, including my boyfriend. I’m a decade older than her and I was just like, whatever…as long as she doesn’t actually come over and try her stupidness up close and personal.

Eventually, every guy in the bar was so distracted that the whole place started completely malfunctioning. The bartender was too busy flirting with her that he failed to keep our beers coming as usual and my opponent at the pool table was becoming a cake-walk as he was not mentally present.

That’s when I started to get annoyed. Of course, I knew that anything I said would sound like I was jealous and envious, so I said nothing and seethed silently, salvaging what I could of my happy hour. Cue karma: She sashayed up to the bar again in her tall wedges and mini skirt, climbed on top of the stool, knelt on it, and leaned forward toward the bartender. She had no panties on. Sexy? Not really, because it was also her time of the month.

stringytaco

43. Here’s The Kicker

When I was in high school, my city had automatic sprinklers in most of its parks. They would turn on automatically at like 3 or 4 am. Being young and dumb kids, my friends and I figured out that if you kicked them hard enough, the tops would break off and the sprinklers would full-force shoot a huge stream into the air.

We thought it was hilarious and we were never caught. We kept destroying the sprinklers until one day, we were caught completely off-guard. They started replacing them with new super-strong steel ones. I kicked one and broke my big toe. While in agony, I also rolled my ankle so bad that it was bruised up for a week. Even after it healed, it has never been the same.

oldjesus

44. Wheeling And Dealing

A cyclist flew through a red light at an intersection and I almost clobbered him. I was used to these guys, so I just harrumphed and slowed down. This then guy proceeded to cut me off AGAIN and also threw his cigarette at me. I used to be a smoker and a litterer back then, so in my frustration, I flicked my butt out of my window and put both hands on the wheel.

The butt caught the wind and flicked back into the cyclist’s face, causing him to crash into the median. It’s still satisfying thinking about it.

baconvein

45. Hot And Ready

While in line at the coffee shop, some little toddler punk grabbed at the hot coffee that was meant for me. The barista tried to stop the kid, but this kid was not having it. He took a huge sip, mistaking it for the pumpkin spice latte his mom ordered for him before me. He promptly made a face, spit it out, and dropped the hot coffee all over himself.

That’s when chaos ensued. The mom berated the employee for letting this happen, waving her own large frappe wildly in the air as she did so. The little hellion was still throwing a full tantrum on the floor while pulling at his mom’s pants…then the frappe fell on him too. I giggled.

TulipTeddyBear

46. My Aim Is True

I was working at a summer camp this past summer. All the male campers were playing dodge ball while the girls were in their cabins doing their own thing. It was the campers versus the staff, and since it was nearing the end of the night, the rules were that if you got hit, you would be done with no chance of revival.

I looked across the gym and saw that one of my fellow staff was laying on the ground with his hands behind his head. So naturally, I grab a dodge ball, sneaked around behind him, keeping myself out of his field of view, and threw the ball at him. As I was laughing and running away, it bounced off of him and, without hesitation, he brought his leg up and kicked the ball as hard as he could. It hit me straight in the face with enough force to knock me off my feet.

HoboLicker5000

47. Look Before You Leap

This happened a couple of days ago. This guy was in his BMW 3 series and he got stuck in a turn-only lane. He cut someone off and the car behind him honked. At that point, he stopped, put his car in park, got out, and started walking towards the car he cut off. Little did he know what he was getting into.

There was a police SUV a couple of cars behind them. As soon as the guy started walking towards the car, the officer turned on his lights. Great justice was had that day. And yes, he did look like the typical “law doesn’t apply to me” jerk.

WildnWil

48. Take A Picture, It’ll Last Longer

When I was seven, I had this really terrible babysitter. She would call 911 and yell for assistance before hanging up really quickly, just for fun. She would also regularly forget to make us dinner. The worst thing she did, however, was bring her boyfriend over so that they could make out on the couch and watch movies. Classic teenage stuff, really.

Every time he was over, she would lock me in my room and my five-year-old autistic brother in the basement. He didn’t understand how locks or light switches worked, so he cried pretty much the entire time. One day, shortly after Christmas while she was over, I took my new point and shoot the camera out for a spin, pretending I was a detective.

I would creep along walls and jump around corners, snapping away at whatever I could find. I could hear my babysitter talking to her boyfriend on the phone, so I thought I would “investigate.” I crept up to the kitchen and then swung around the corner, snapping away in my camera. She got really angry and chased me around the house as I was laughing my head off.

The next week, my mom took me to get my film developed. She and I sat down in the mall food court and looked at the pictures…because what mom wouldn’t want to see the pictures their son took with their Christmas present? As we flipped through, my mom snatched one of the pictures. Her face went red with fury. What was it, you ask? My mom was holding photographic proof of my babysitter going through my mom’s purse.

I’ve never seen my mom go off on anyone as she did on that 16-year-old witch.

mattbott

49. We Never Learn

I got rear-ended in a turn lane because a girl was texting. She was doing 45 mph and she hit me while I was stopped. I went to her court date, hoping she got a big fine or something like that. When the verdict was announced, my blood boiled. She got a $50 ticket, which was basically a slap on the wrist. So yeah, I was more than a little bit upset about this. But I didn’t know what was coming…

As I was sitting at the stoplight to pull out of the court, I watched her run a red light and T-bone an officer. I don’t normally laugh at other people’s misfortunes, however, I laughed my butt off at that one.

SirCorono

50. Payback Time

My sister’s fiancé left her for another woman when he found out she was pregnant, but at the very least, she was able to win child support in court. Well, he got hired on full time and got a huge raise on the first of May. Two weeks later, the other woman left him and took their newborn son with her. My sister’s claim for child support (plus the 18 months he was overdue) also hit at that time, so things really took a turn in his life for the worst.

Permalink

51. Room Service

For a full year, my college roommate secretly slept with my boyfriend while I was at class. I routinely took more than a full course load and was in math and science classes or study groups every morning. One day, I walked in to see a horrifying sight. They were just fully in the act after I came back early from a cancelled class.

I moved out. I was more angry at her than heartbroken. I also lost most of my friends through the breakup, and they stuck together for a good while. Fast forward five years later. Those two throw a crazy expensive engagement party at the guy’s parents’ beach house, which was attended by some still-mutual friends who told me everything.

At the party, she caught him sleeping with one of the waitresses from the catering company in a bathroom. They still got married. I feel a little bad for her despite the karma balance. She feels like she can’t do better than being with a cheater.

whalesharkbite

Delayed karmaUnsplash

52. Busted

I worked as an internal audit intern for a local municipality. I was 20 years old and hadn’t even taken an audit class yet. After a few weeks, I realized quickly that I was underqualified for the job. However, I still tried to learn and work my tail off.

I noticed there were some issues with the policies and procedures in place. For example, missing money and weak controls. Anytime I brought it up, the manager would sweep it under the rug and ignore it.

Long story short, I had a huge argument with her and she let me go.

Three months later, the FBI show up at my door. They asked me a few questions about my old manager. Turns out she conspired with the mayor to accept donations in exchange for certain actions. Not sure what those actions were. Either way, she got fired and got charged, along with ten other city officials.

1jq512

Sources: 1, 2


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