They say one’s wedding day will come and go, but the memories will last a lifetime. That rings especially true when the day doesn’t go as planned. Tipsy guests, feuding families, and general mishaps all come together and turn the big day into a big disaster that is hard to forget.
1. All In The Family
I've had my fair share of capturing weddings of the super-wealthy. A couple of years back, I was hired for a sizable church wedding. The lovebirds were both in their late twenties, with the best man being the considerably older uncle of the groom. The ceremony kicked off smoothly, albeit with a noticeably anxious bride.
I was hoping to capture her looking joyful, but it proved to be a challenging task. As the ceremony progressed, the bride began to sway subtly. They started to exchange vows, and not long into them, the worst thing imaginable happened. She ended up throwing up all over herself and the groom.
Panic ensued as the bridal party rushed to help her while she broke down in tears. I put my camera aside at this point, paying attention to the unfolding drama. I initially thought she was upset about the messy state of her wedding, but it turned out she was hiding a deep secret.
Through her tears, she confessed she was experiencing morning sickness. She remained inconsolable as the groom kept reminding her they hadn't been intimate yet. As she threw up again, the groom questioned her about the baby's father. All she did was cast a guilt-filled look at the uncle.
The groom, without a moment's hesitation, punched the uncle right in the face. The uncle collapsed, and mayhem broke out.
2. You Can’t Picture This One!
I was assigned to be the photographer at a life-long friend's wedding. We had shared a neighborhood and our parents were good buddies. But my friend was a pretty difficult kid, so we lost touch just around the start of our teenage years. In fact, by the time I got word about his wedding, we hadn't crossed paths in more than 15 years.
The invitation came from my mom, who even suggested I be part of his wedding party. I was surprised and told her it wasn't realy fitting given that we hadn't had a conversation in ages. It turns out, he hadn't managed to keep many friends throughout the years, so they needed me to help out—it would be a favor to our moms.
They sweetened the deal by asking if my mom and I could take up the photography for the wedding as our gift. Despite my reluctance, I agreed. When I went over to meet the group, it didn’t take long for me to understand their desperation for help.
The groom's dental hygiene had been severely neglected over the years and the bride was noticeably heavy-set as well as overbearing. Nonetheless, I gathered my composure and participated. Unexpectedly, right after the ceremony, the bride expressed her desire to be whisked away to the Hilton in a white limo.
However, it was the peak of wedding season in June and all limos were fully booked, just like the Hilton. The best man, who was the groom's elder brother, was in a fix trying to manage the situation as the bride was having a major meltdown. Amidst this tantrum, she pulled out her headpiece ferociously, taking a good chunk of her hair with it.
She stormed off to a back room and the groom followed to try and calm her down. But, some minutes later, he bolted out of that room with blood gushing from his palm where a butcher blade was sticking out. Things escalated quickly as it appeared she might harm him in front of everyone.
Both the best man and I jumped to the groom's rescue. Despite us restraining her and even getting bitten by her, the bride managed to wriggle free, her sights set on the escaping groom. He had managed to start his car, but she clung onto the windshield wipers as he peeled out of the parking lot. As he sped off, she fell onto the road and tumbled into a curb.
We bolted over to find her scratched up and sobbing uncontrollably. The following day, their marriage was officially called off.
3. The Show Must Go On
I once organized a wedding for two quite affluent families. The bride chose a rustic, "shabby chic" theme, and wanted the event on her family's estate, in an old barn. This brought up a bunch of issues. The barn had to be cleaned, we needed extra tents because the barn was too small, and there was also no electricity or running water.
We managed to fix the last problem with generators, water containers for the caterers, and portable toilets in a side tent. Despite the bride being difficult, I handled all this as it was my job. The ceremony and cocktail hour had gone by, and it was time to prepare for the bridal party’s entrance, after which the first dance and cake cutting would occur.
Everything had to be perfectly timed because dinner was to be served simultaneously. Just as I was discussing this with the caterer, I noticed the bride signalling frantically to my assistant. Soon after, my assistant informed me over the headset that there was a problem.
The bride, wearing an extensive ball gown with a fitted top and various undergarments, needed to use the restroom. Given her elaborate attire, this was a huge issue. We had trouble getting her into the car earlier, so using the portable toilets would definitely be tricky.
I reassured everyone else of a 15-minute delay, and sent my assistant to help. But 15 minutes turned into 20. Then, my assistant radioed in with an urgent, "The issue is worse than we thought". Rushing over, I realized the bride had an upset stomach due a combination of health shakes, cocktails, and a large breakfast.
The mess was indescribable, especially given the smell. Worse off, her latex shapewear had trapped all this mess in it. When my assistant unsnapped the shapewear, the mess spread to the bride's thighs. Attempting to clean it spread it further. Now, I had a traumatized assistant and a crying bride.
Despite the stench, the bride wanted her dance to begin immediately. I started cleaning her hands as best as I could, while the introductions and dance began. When the groom spun the bride around during their choreographed dance, the mess in the shapewear smeared up and stained the back of her gown.
After they left the dance floor, they proceeded to cut and feed each other cake with stained hands. I had to step in immediately. I left my assistant in charge and began preparations. I borrowed a tub of water from the caterers, and got ready in dish gloves and a poncho.
I then cleaned the bride and her gown, and cut out the stained part of the lining, before getting her dressed again. For the rest of the event, the grimy support tent was closed. The groom was a good sport and only asked for the garter toss to be cancelled, understandably so.
Photos from the event ended up looking quite amazing in a magazine, considering the behind-the-scenes ordeal.
4. A Multitude Of Problems
My cousin decided to have a wedding event that would extend over several days. The idea was that the family would come in for the entire weekend, engaging in diverse wedding activities that would span from flower picking to games like laser tag. However, the actual wedding ceremony happened on Friday night, attended by close family and friends.
The ceremony was immediately followed by a lovely dinner and a fun series of toasts. The next day, a group of what can be described as second-tier guests were invited to the formal reception. Unfortunately, this reception was a potluck where drinks weren't served. Due to confusion from the way the invitations were worded, guests were left perplexed.
Some had taken the trouble to drive quite a distance and were left wondering when exactly they were going to witness the marriage ceremony. I had to explain that the ceremony had already taken place the day before and that the day's reception was a potluck where everyone had to bring a dish. Talk about awkward.
5. A Brother’s Bridal Ballad
I attended a wedding at a winery in Napa Valley back in the heydays of the tech boom in the 90s. The groom was a rising venture capitalist, and the bride was an uptight, impeccably groomed blonde. Their habit of speaking in tech jargon extended even to their wedding invite—a pretend Wall Street Journal announcement of a merger.
Despite the eccentricities, the groom was a friend, so my date and I decided to join in the celebration. The first bizarre episode happened when the bride's twin brother serenaded his sister with a self-written love song. As he knelt before her strumming his guitar, his raw emotion left everyone feeling uneasy.
The song was all about his sister's beauty and how fortunate her suitor was. Though I can't recall the entire song, a particular line, "Lips brushing, tongues twirling. Their looks implying something profound," has remained stuck in my head. But that wasn't the weirdest part.
There was no hint of humor—he was in tears, making his audience wish the ground would open up and swallow them. Fast forward to the wedding ceremony—we were all seated in a charming garden courtyard, an aisle down the center leading to a pavilion.
We took our places on white upholstered chairs and once the ceremony was over, the officiant instructed us to look under the chairs for a small white envelope. The envelope, he explained, held a live Monarch butterfly symbolizing the couple's love about to take flight. A wave of shock ran through the guests.
Whoever had set the stage had mistakenly placed the envelopes on, rather than under, the chairs. The horrified guests picked up the sadly squashed butterflies, which had been sat on for almost three-quarters of an hour.
6. The Couple Had A Small Problem
The best man shakily stood to deliver his speech, instantly complimenting the bride on her radiant beauty. Unfortunately, things quickly spiraled downhill from there. With regrettable disrespect, he insinuated the groom may not satisfy the bride fully due to some personal shortcomings.
He started to shout these comments just as he was ushered away. The groom, overcome by total humiliation, buried his face in his hands. The bride, in tears, bolted from the room.
By all accounts, both bride and groom had practiced abstinence until marriage, rendering her unaware of his circumstance. My heart ached for the pair in their exposed vulnerability. This episode was by far the most uncomfortable scene I've ever witnessed at a wedding.
7. The Hatfields And The McCoys
I once attended a wedding for a friend where I was a bridesmaid. Tension permeated the air as constant disagreements kept erupting between my friend (the bride), the groom, and his entire family. The groom was treated like a baby. To his family, my friend seemed to be the wicked woman snatching their beloved baby away.
Conflicts reached another level when it came to their dissimilar backgrounds. The bride hailed from an affluent family, unlike the groom, which resulted in a major argument between their parents. On the wedding day, the atmosphere was far from the blissful unity one would hope for.
The bride was endlessly insulted by the groom's grown-up sisters. The groom's mother was a ball of nerves, either causing a commotion or sending daggers towards my friend with her menacing glares. It seemed that everyone had drowned themselves in drinks, all but me.
In fact, my inability to drink because of my epilepsy didn't escape criticism. I was loudly condemned and ridiculed by the bride and her friends for my condition. Eventually, I reached the limit of my tolerance and decided to remove myself from the chaos.
8. A Surprise Gift
The couple had been together for quite a while, trying to start a family, but with no success. Then, while they were immersed in planning their grand wedding, they found out that they were finally going to be parents.
By the time the wedding rolled around, the bride was already seven months into her pregnancy, and their guests were thoroughly enjoying the reception. But then, the couple itself went missing. Guests began searching, but they were nowhere to be found.
A short while later, there was a sight that took everyone's breath away—the groom, carrying his bride, her wedding gown drenched in blood. He led her to an ambulance he'd called from the restroom they'd been in. The bride had given birth prematurely. Despite losing a lot of blood and passing out, her baby was alive.
The newborn was immediately taken to a nearby hospital equipped for premature babies, while the bride was rushed to a different, distant hospital. The groom spent his wedding day shuttling between the two. Upon regaining consciousness, the bride's first demand was to see her child.
The first family portrait features them, gazing at their tiny baby, the bride still wearing her wedding tiara.
9. The Fighting Irish
Once upon a time, I held a job as a bartender in an Irish hotel that was barely getting by. In an attempt to keep our heads above water, we booked a wedding gig for a fairly infamous family. Their daughter was about to get hitched to a bloke from a likewise notorious family from a different part of Ireland.
Both families being massive, it was a grand event. But about two hours into the festivities, chaos broke loose. The first warning of something amiss was the sudden rush of women towards the exit. Fortunately, one of our floor managers had seen this kind of scenario before, and was quick to usher the waitresses away from the crowd.
No sooner had the women evacuated, than the men started to throw punches. Witnessing a bottle whizz past, we rapidly closed the bar with the protective shutter. It was the most intense brawl I'd ever witnessed. The conflict quickly escalated, with a staggering fifty men getting stuck into each other.
In an even more bewildering turn, someone drove a car straight into the emergency exit. Chairs became missiles, smashing through windows. The aggressive spectacle overflowed into the remaining parts of the hotel, leaving the staff cowering either behind the bar or within the kitchen.
We dialed the authorities, but they took their sweet time arriving, apparently hoping the battling guests would tire themselves out. When the fiasco finally ended, we cut a break to all the other guests. The rest of the night, till about 4 am, was spent scrubbing blood, sweeping up broken glass, and dealing with other unmentionable messes.
The hotel never really bounced back. We were obliged to cancel the upcoming three weddings due to the extensive damage, and soon, word spread around, halting further bookings. The hotel was forced to shut its doors not much later.
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10. When Doves Cry
I attended a wedding that took place in a barn, where the barn door remained wide open for the majority of the time during both the initial prep and the actual ceremony. They had this idea of freeing about twelve doves at the end of their vows. But unfortunately, they were oblivious to the fact that it's not wise to set doves free near active ceiling fans.
A number of the doves flew right back in, collided with the spinning metal fans, and things went south from there. Blood splattered everywhere. Needless to say, the bride was in a waterfall of tears and the groom found himself angry at the gentleman who brought the doves. The whole scenario turned into an utter mess.
Seeing this, my wife and I decided to make an exit. There was no way to pull that event back together.
11. Rap It Up Champ
My better half had the honor of officiating a wedding. The bride was absolutely stunning in a daring dress, while the groom wore loose jeans, a simple T, and a trucker cap. On top of that, he seemed quite tipsy. He gulped down a shot, followed it with a swig of Old English 40, and pumped himself up a la Rocky Balboa with a "Let's roll!"
As soon as my wife started the ceremony, the groom spun towards her with a rather bone-chilling comment. He offered, "I'll hand over $100 if you stay quiet". He then produced his personally penned vows, and began to "rap" them, with little grace.
Awkwardness filled the air for the next two minutes as his and her family looked like they wanted to disappear into thin air. The bride stood petrified, aghast at this unexpected lyrical spectacle. My wife decided to skip large parts of the ceremony, promptly declared them man and wife, had the paperwork validated, and we hightailed it out of there.
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12. A Sobering Ultimatum
A few years back, I attended a wedding where the groom and his buddies started drinking at 9 in the morning. I wasn't even part of the wedding party, but I got a distress call an hour before the ceremony from the best man—the officiant had dropped by and warned that if they didn't get their act together, he wasn't going to marry them off.
So, off I went to their room to try and get them to see sense. Surprisingly, they managed to clear their heads enough to get dressed and march up the aisle. They were wobbling a bit, but they made it through; the bride, however, was far from pleased.
The reception followed, and within just 10 minutes, one of the groomsmen felt a drink would settle his stomach. What ensued next was a nightmare. He turned to toss his congratulatory wishes to the newly wedded couple, but ended up throwing up all over them.
13. A Sign From Above?
I attended an extravagant event in the open air with tents pitched and a string quartet creating an enchanting atmosphere. However, as soon as the couple neared the altar, ominous clouds gathered overhead, punctuated by the distant rumbling of thunder.
Just as they were about to exchange vows, a hailstorm began with hailstones the size of golf balls. The hailstorm was so loud and the winds so fierce, none of their words were audible. Suddenly, the grassy area turned into a treacherous muddy mess, even causing the dance floor to begin drifting away.
When the couple reached the pivotal "I do" moment, a lightning bolt struck nearby, echoing in everyone's ears. Part of the marquee gave way and people scattered, seeking shelter in the main building or their vehicles. Despite the chaos, the couple completed their vows in the main hallway.
However, the marriage only endured for six months. It's almost as if there were signs hinting they shouldn't proceed, but they chose to ignore them.
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14. Into The Woods
My cousin tied the knot on a scorching August day, smack-dab in the middle of a heatwave. The wedding backdrop was a bug-filled forest without nearly enough seating. The ones lucky enough to snag a chair, found themselves perched at a splinter-ridden wooden table. But that was just the beginning.
Their small child wailed non-stop during the entire event, while the bride, on the verge of giving birth, did nothing but grumble about the heat. As they strolled down the aisle, she slapped her father for stepping on her foot. My brother had an unusual task—to symbolize unity by joining two goldfish in one bowl. But unfortunately, one of them was already a goner.
So, he ended up slipping in one live and one lifeless fish.
15. She Went Out Partying Till The End
A wedding guest thought the celebration was a bit dull, so she spiced things up by indulging in some pot brownies during the ceremony. As the cocktail hour rolled in, she bolstered her fun with more drinks. Suddenly, amidst the frenzy of dancing guests, she unexpectedly urinated on herself, then tumbled backwards, hitting her head against a pillar.
There she lay unconscious, with urine trickling down her legs, and blood oozing from her head. However, the band paid no mind and continued their performance, people danced on, and some offered help.
Emergency services were called, and as they were escorting her on a stretcher, she managed to raise an arm in the iconic sign of rock and roll, matching the rhythm of the music as she was wheeled away.
16. A Final Celebration
I wasn't very familiar with the bride's family, but I attended her wedding. Her dad was a bit on the heavier side, but seemingly in good health. Then, amid the ceremony, an unthinkable event occurred: He suffered a sudden heart attack and tragically passed at the age of 57.
At first, people thought it might be a prank, but they quickly realized the grim reality. It was a terribly heartbreaking scenario. The bride, naturally, was beyond grief-stricken and the groom, in shock himself, did all he could to comfort her. They accompanied the ambulance to the hospital, leaving the rest of us in a state of disarray at the church.
The bride's chief bridesmaid took the initiative to announce that the reception should continue, despite the circumstances, as the bride didn't want her guests to feel neglected. I'm not sure if anyone actually attended the reception.
Once things settled down, about a month later, the wedding party and several guests threw a barbecue to finally celebrate the couple's marriage in a joyful manner.
17. Blowing In The Wind
My distant relative, my second cousin, tied the knot in scenic Vermont during the refreshing season of spring. According to the weather forecast, there was a subtle possibility of rainfall, which led to the couple hiring an impressively large tent, reminiscent of a circus big top.
This massive tent was sprawled across the beautiful meadow, conveniently situated beside a serene pond. It was spacious enough to shelter all 80 guests, including their seats and tables, comfortably. The marriage ceremony took place in a local church situated just a couple miles from the reception site.
The bride made quite an entrance—she arrived at the church on a motorcycle, given her father belonged to the neighborhood Harley Davidson enthusiasts club. Midway through the church ceremony, a light rain began to patter outside.
Unphased, the newly wed couple mounted their respective motorcycles, escorted by their motorcyclist buddies, and headed towards the reception. Approximately a minute after they'd taken off, the mild drizzle escalated into a fierce tropical storm, complete with howling winds, a barrage of sleet, and sudden hail.
Undeterred by the raging storm, they pressed on towards the venue. By the time the rest of us reached there, we were greeted by quite a spectacle. Wind gusts had uprooted the tent, while the groom and his groomsmen, now shirtless, struggled to wrestle the rebel tent back into its position.
The bride, drenched from head to toe, patiently waited for a dry clothing set to reach her. Such was the intensity of the wind that it caused the calm pond to rage, creating waves as tall as two feet that crashed onto the shore, even managing to wet a bridesmaid's table positioned nearby.
As the remaining guests and I sprang into action to assist with the tent, a sudden gust of wind threw us off, quite literally sending one of the bridesmaids into the pond.
18. At Least Nana Saw The Nuptials
I attended my close friend's wedding recently. The ceremony was utterly enchanting, but during the reception, sadly the bride's grandma didn't feel too good. The paramedics were immediately called and they took her away. Tragically, she didn't survive the journey to the hospital.
The silver lining was that she witnessed her granddaughter's special day. What made things more unfortunate was that the bride's great-grandma was also present and she had to witness her own daughter's passing on the day of her great-granddaughter's wedding.
19. Get It Right For Kristin's Sake!
In the middle of the ceremony, the minister continually referred to the bride as "Elizabeth," when her actual name was Kristin. Both the bride and her maid of honor made several attempts to rectify the situation, but alas, the elderly priest, with his hearing not as sharp as it once was, kept on mistakenly calling her by the wrong name.
These series of blunders made the whole event quite chaotic. Adding to the drama, the groom's parents surprisingly made an appearance halfway through the whole proceeding.
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20. Need A Ride?
I went to a wedding as the best man's plus-one. The bridal party had seven bridesmaids. Tragically, three of them had a car accident going to the rehearsal dinner. Luckily, they weren't injured, but the car was a write-off. One chose to skip the wedding and went home instead.
Since no one had planned shuttle service from the hotel to the rehearsal for the wedding party, I volunteered to be their chauffeur. Oddly enough, I was asked to vacate my own vehicle to make space for another bridesmaid, apparently on the bride's instructions. It felt a bit out of place since, apart from the best man, everyone else was a stranger.
The rehearsal dinner didn't kick off until late, 11 pm, causing most of the bride and groom's family members to bow out as it was just too late for them to dine. And then, the wedding day itself arrived along with absolute pandemonium. For starters, the bride turned up hours late for the ceremony.
A mix-up at the hotel made the horse and carriage, meant for her trip, over an hour late. When they finally managed to fetch her and the wedding party, one of the horses suffered a terrible accident and broke its leg, while the other one passed of a heart attack. We had to tell the flower girl, who had been on the carriage, that the horse was simply taking a nap.
And as if all this wasn't enough, the bride's sister had a severe allergic reaction to the food at the reception and had to be rushed to the hospital. The whole thing was frenzied.
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21. It Was All A Bit Too Much
I attended a wedding for a couple of pals at an immensely ordinary assembly hall. The ceremony progressed smoothly and everything seemed perfectly fine. However, when the reception started, things turned chaotic. We were given undercooked chicken and astonishingly dry cake to consume. But there was worse to come.
As the reception continued into the evening, the groom continually topped up his drink. Eventually, his demeanor turned aggressive and dictatorial. He asked all the ladies to join him on the floor and dance provocatively. With a little more drinks n his system, he started becoming considerably too intimate with some of the bridesmaids.
He overstepped his bounds with one and clung on to her, which resulted in her biting his ear. Subsequently, he ordered everyone to eject the woman from the wedding proceedings. This unnatural uproar caught the attention of the bride, who was upset about her special day being marred and exclaimed, "This is ruining my wedding!"
That's when the groom started verbally laying into her. The bride's uncle attempted to mediate, but was met with hostility from the groom. Eventually, the groom was pacified when the bridesmaid who bit him sat on his knee and allowed him to toy with her cleavage with his fingertip, accompanying it with little pecks.
22. What A Bunch Of Balogna
It was a hot day in late June when my cousin tied the knot in a quaint little Kentucky town, which was a good hour's journey from the nearest hotel. The wedding, set up under the blazing sun in the midst of a field, was a bit delayed, starting about forty-five minutes behind schedule.
With the sun relentlessly pouring down on us, we were all perspiring heavily, ruining our good clothes despite our best efforts. The only solace came in the form of bottled water, placed on both sides of the aisle. Sadly though, the water was warm and there was no ice to cool it down.
Adding to our discomfort was the abundance of mosquitoes in the area. The bride was the creative force behind the decor—a collection of sapless plants, languishing under the harsh sun. These plants, still encased in plastic pots with hooks, were placed haphazardly along the aisle.
While they had ample finances for a grand reception, they chose to have it at the local middle school cafeteria, which unfortunately had a lingering smell of stale mac-and-cheese. The walls were adorned with recycled prom decorations and the dinner was nothing more than bologna and ham sandwiches cut into quarters, accompanied by a variety of condiments.
The wedding cake was a simple one—a sheet cake, bearing a sports team logo.
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23. The Bride Thought It Would Pass
I attended a wedding where the lovebirds had been sweet on each other since high school, 11 years in all. Their long-awaited marriage was a joyous event. The ceremony was touching and succinct, leaving not a single dry eye among us. The wedding party then posed for photos, during which time my boyfriend, a groomsman, asked me to grab him a drink.
I arrived to see all the groomsmen idle, while a huddle formed around the bride, composed of the groom and the bridesmaids. Surprisingly, the bride was feeling bad, to the point she needed assistance to get to the reception. The sudden illness was completely unexpected.
Nevertheless, the couple made an entrance and gracefully executed their first dance. After sharing dances with their parents and kicking off the dinner, they announced they needed to rush to the hospital. Sadly, they missed their own reception. However, the celebration carried on late into the night as per their wish.
As we prepared to head home, we bumped into the couple returning to the hotel. Unexpectedly, the bride's poor health was due to a kidney stone.
24. Unscripted
I had the honor of being the best man at a wedding. A couple of weeks before the big day, the bride's mom and stepdad started persistently asking me for a copy of my upcoming speech. They planned to prepare cue cards for the audience, similar to what's done during live TV shows. It's safe to say, I never provided them a copy.
This situation led to a few uncomfortable chats when I eventually crossed paths with them at the rehearsal dinner.
25. Whose Wedding Is It Anyway?
I attended a wedding where the mother of the bride donned what essentially looked like a wedding gown. To top it off, she also wanted to escort her daughter down the aisle, alongside her ex-husband who is the father of the bride. Unfortunately, the aisle wasn't wide enough to accommodate all three of them easily.
Upon the wedding's conclusion, we discovered that the photographer was smitten with the maid of honor, resulting in over half of the photos featuring her. Unbelievably, there was not a single portrait of only the bride and groom.
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26. Meal Mixup
At the party, the hotel mistakenly served the incorrect main course. Instead of simply overlooking the issue and seeking reimbursement later, the bride demanded they prepare the entire meal again—for a crowd of 100!
Essentially, this put the celebration on pause since everyone had to delay their dinner plans for an additional 2-3 hours. Numerous attendees spent the evening at the bar, eventually leaving without catching a glimpse of the newlyweds.
27. It All Came Out At Once
The bride, having indulged a tad too much, found herself throwing up and accidentally soiling her wedding gown. The groom wasn't pleased either, witnessing the guests quarrelling got to him and he ended up hurling a glass, which went right through a window. But that's not all.
An engaged couple decided this was the best moment to call it quits, and the woman threw her engagement ring at her now-former fiance. And this all unfolded at a single wedding ceremony. A crew of officers were called in, deciding to clamp down on the whole fiasco before the stroke of midnight.
28. No Respect
One of our friends from the army was tying the knot with a lady who didn't serve. He extended wedding invitations to all his combat comrades, resulting in a room filled with people wearing dress uniforms. Then came time for the fun part—the tradition of cutting the cake and playfully smearing it on each other's faces.
The bride excitedly took her piece and slid the cake across her husband's left chest. It happened to spoil his decorated ribbons which is a big-time faux pas. We were all surprised and taken aback. Disgruntled by the spectacle, most of the army-attired guests decided to leave.
The bride was simply bursting into laughter, but the groom, saddled with embarrassment, didn't share her amusement. Their marriage, as it turned out, was short-lived.
29. The Sister-In-Law Got Snubbed
I attended an open-air nuptial event last June, set in the humid, sweltering conditions of Southeast Texas. Imagine this: it's 100 degrees out, and it's been pouring all day until about 20 minutes before the vows. The bridal party, unfortunately, looked quite worn out due to the heat, and a good number of the attendees were grumbling about the temperature.
30. Bitter Sweet Boredom
I attended a wedding recently where the bride made her entrance to the strains of "Bitter Sweet Symphony" playing from a boombox. The ceremony dragged on for two hours and included a painfully awkward thirty-minute long "sand mixing" ritual followed by a twenty-minute candle lighting. Needless to say, it was a long and rather uneventful affair.
After the ceremony, we all relocated to an expansive hall at a local convention center for the reception. It was a spacious area, much too large for the 100 guests in attendance. We barely took up a fraction of the room. Then, the DJ cranked up the volume to ear-splitting levels, making it nearly impossible to enjoy the dance floor.
And if that wasn't enough, there was a cash bar that served just wine. To top it off, the hosts had only rented the hall for two hours. So, the reception was as drawn-out as the ceremony. It felt more like a nightmare than a festive occasion.
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31. Mass Exodus
I attended a buddy's wedding held at a versatile venue within an apartment complex. Sadly, both families ended up really tipsy from inexpensive beverages before the marriage rites, which wasn't the best idea. Unexpectedly, during the ceremony, two guests started fighting.
Things escalated quickly, and the entire bride's family surprisingly left. Around 40 guests abruptly rose to their feet, left midway through the ceremony, and headed home.
32. Game Time
A girl I went to high school with chose to tie the knot after a total of eight weeks in a relationship—four of them dating and four being engaged. She hurriedly sent out invitations via email one Tuesday, for an intimate backyard wedding slated for the following Sunday. The locale was indeed her mom's backyard but interestingly, it was a shared space within a trailer park.
They planned to kick things off noon sharp on that Sunday. The early start was to ensure they wrapped up before the much-anticipated football game began. Sadly, they didn't ensure guest comfort—there wasn't any seating available. The ceremony itself was a 45-minute affair.
Our couple chose to read out three sets of wedding vows or inspirational snippets from the web. The clock ticked away, leaving just a quarter of an hour for their guests to enjoy the reception before the football game was underway.
The food spread was pretty basic—they had arranged for the delivery of four pizza pies, a couple of 20-piece chicken wing portions and three big bags of chips to cater to their 40 guests. There were, alas, no forks, plates, napkins or even any beverages provided.
When 1 PM rolled around, the bride's father made an unexpected appearance, demanding that the guests leave soon so that he could watch his football game undisturbed.
33. A Serious Arrangement
I once had a job at a wedding location that wasn't tied to any particular religion. One instance, we hosted an event for a traditional Muslim family who were having an arranged marriage, and so there were no drinks served. The bride and groom hadn't actually met before, they only knew each other through Skype calls, and the bride wasn't fluent in English.
Picture it as a first date, but surrounded by numerous stern and sober relatives. It was quite uncomfortable and there wasn't really any joyful atmosphere. The newlyweds even departed before the event ended.
34. “I Do” Disaster
A couple of years back, my brother tied the knot and honestly, it was chaotic from the get-go. Before the wedding, he and his bride-to-be managed to alienate pretty much everyone in our family. Unsurprisingly, my parents, the primary financial backers of the whole thing, pulled their support about three months prior to the main event.
In response, my brother and his future wife sent an email to all of the invitees, indirectly accusing my parents of ditching them in their time of need.mThis situation created a deep rift in the family. As a result, it was only the closest family members who attended the wedding.
The big day, much like the drama pre-wedding, was another unpleasant experience. My brother and his spouse failed to settle the bills for the minister and food providers. Consequently, we were embarrassingly left with nothing more than a handful of veggie platters to serve, which my parents graciously paid for on the spot.
In a nutshell, my brother's relationship was a catastrophe, and this wedding was particularly a rough chapter in our family history.
35. Life Is Just A Rodeo
My cousin decided to tie the knot in a quaint, rural town in Wisconsin, choosing the local rodeo grounds as the venue. This choice pretty much set the mood for the unique celebration that followed.
Following a rather ordinary ceremony, the newlyweds and their closest friends embarked on a four-hour-long bar crawl, leaving the rest of the guests back at the rodeo grounds without any form of entertainment or refreshments. As time ticked away, the bride's stepdad unexpectedly took charge, arranging the meal so folks could finally begin eating.
Upon their return from bar hopping, the bride and groom were taken aback to find people dining in their absence. This sparked an exodus of several guests who had grown impatient from the long wait. The pregnant bride drew additional attention by parading around with cigarettes peeping from her cleavage and sipping alcoholic drinks in excess.
The event, unfortunately, was anything but enjoyable.
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36. I Don’t Get Paid Enough For This
I once DJ'd a difficult wedding. It began with the groom requesting a Raiders logo to be projected on the ceiling throughout the reception. He had hired me along with a band. However, the groom's family demanded the band perform first, only playing cumbias, while my playlist should be strictly Latin music.
This frustrated the bride, even though she hadn't been the one to hire me. I did my best to navigate the situation—but things only escalated further. The bride, after having too many drinks, started dancing suggestively with some guys. This led to the groom trying to confront her.
However, she swung at him and missed, accidentally hitting her maid of honor, causing a nosebleed. Tensions flared leading to an intense skirmish with firearms being brandished. Seeing this, I decided to pack up and exit just as the authorities were arriving.
37. The Greatest Show On Earth
I've presided over a handful of weddings myself, but there was one that didn't quite unfold as planned. The match was a combination of Jewish and Catholic backgrounds, without any personal belief in God from either party. His proposal was a mere result of pressure from his family, while her acceptance was at the mercy of an audience—her own family.
Speaking of her family, they were well-off and had a pretty tough wedding planner onboard—it seemed the extravagant wedding was a disaster in the making. As their friend, the couple had enlisted me to create and officiate a ceremony of their pleasing. We crafted something meaningful together, which they approved of.
The rehearsal took place at an idyllic botanical garden. However, less-than-perfect ballerina performances and a slow-to-set-up violinist took up all our rehearsal time for the actual ceremony. On the day itself, the ceremony commenced in a less than ideal way.
With about twenty minutes to spare, I was informed that I'd need to wear a mic, without opportunity to test it out beforehand. In addition, an A/V team was filming the entire event from various angles for DVD production. As the couple made their way to the altar, my speech was interrupted by the loud horn of a passing train.
Ideally, we would've liked to wait for the train to pass, but the noise just went on and on. After a minute, I had no other option but to kick off the ceremony. But as soon as I started, a loud squawk of feedback overpowered even the train. Eventually, when things settled down, the speakers issued an annoying delay in my speech.
I was forced to hear my own voice being replayed a few seconds later, throwing me off-kilter and forcing me to simply read from the script. As if all this wasn't crazy enough, performances by ballerinas (a gift from an aunt) added to the insanity. All this while, the train's horn persisted.
The couple stood by, watching almost five minutes of dance. A violin solo, another wedding gift, also took place during the ceremony, with the train managing to drown out this as well. After this mess, we somehow reached the reception, which seemed to glorify the family over the couple's needs or wishes.
The family had prepared a presentation lauding their own accomplishments, including a song tribute to one of the uncles. The bride herself played a song on the piano specifically for this uncle. During the cake cutting, a minor switch from the bride, to more comfortable footwear, was dramatically flagged off by the wedding planner as a wedding-ruining move.
The following day, I was told that the couple had decided to separate as soon as they got back home.
38. This Is A Wedding, Not A Frat Party
Our dear pals tied the knot, and all our college buddies attended the event. Just imagine an open bar scenario. One of my pals lost control—and was unbearably loud and obnoxious. Just when the bride's parents were presenting the newlyweds for their first dance, his voice took over.
The only audible thing was someone cursing beyond control. He was speaking to another friend, but his words left everyone in the banquet hall stunned into silence. Following this, my friend caught the garter belt, wore it on his head, and ran around hollering. Not much later, he ended up quarrelling with an officer as he stirred up a brawl at the hotel.
This was, indeed, a day of unforgettable madness.
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39. An Unwanted Promotion
On the wedding day, the original best man suddenly rushed himself off to a psychiatric clinic without letting anyone know. So, guess who got bumped up to best man just four hours prior to the wedding? Yes, it was me. Not only did I have to prepare a speech on the spot, but I also had to carry out all the responsibilities that were on his plate. The wedding?
It was scheduled in a park located at the peak of a mountain, a place so remote it didn't have cell reception. The bride showed up an hour late, and with no cell service in sight, no one could possibly reach out to her except by driving down the mountain for twenty minutes.
Everyone assumed she had run off, and discussions about calling it a day and leaving began circulating. Just as people were about to give up, she made her appearance.
40. Too Much Celebration
The guest of honor and his wife, both in their 60s and crazy in love, came to our wedding... and they completely messed it up. Armed with a boombox straight from the past, he decided to set up shop in the park where our ceremony was taking place.
We had hoped for a brief and beautiful ceremony, but instead, he started to recite this tiresome and lengthy poem about marriage. We had a hunch he penned it himself. Cue his wife. Just as the sound system began to fizzle out, she began shouting, "Can't hear you! It's BREAKING UP, hon!"
We quickly noticed she was quite tipsy, and kept taking occasional swigs from a flask she'd brought along in her purse. Keep in mind, this was happening at just 4 pm. She heckled us unceremoniously through the entire event. Nobody could get her to stop. It was utterly preposterous.
41. Gender Gap
I attended a wedding where the guests were split up by gender rather than by who they knew—women on the bride's side and men on the groom's side. This made things quite uncomfortable since, like many others present, I was a friend of the groom yet didn't really click with the bride. After the ceremony, we all queued up to wish the newlyweds well.
In an unusual set up, the bride and groom were on different sides of the room. The bride, seated behind a table for presents, seemed to expect every female guest to approach her, regardless of their connection. Those who didn't deposit a generous gift or money-filled card met her disapproving stare.
Only after navigating this gauntlet were guests allowed to reunite with their partners.
42. The Priest’s Copulation Oration
A priest led the nuptials, spending his whole 45-minute speech glorifying the stunning beauty of the bridesmaids. He also encouraged all the wedded pairs present at the celebration to honor the matrimony with an abundance of "amore". He even hinted that the newlyweds should pencil in a christening in about nine months.
After that, he filled the air further with suggestions of "romantic evenings". The bride and groom, being a pair of reserved individuals, were as red as cherries. The attendees were left in disarray, not knowing whether to step in or to just laugh it off.
43. Smokin' Hot
I once volunteered at a hospital that was hosting a wedding in its hall. I'd been called into the kitchen to transport some bulky items. The bride, who was quite unique, was dictating a lot—and her bridezilla tendencies were coming into play. She demanded that we pad the main table with more than 200 candles, while we initially had agreed upon just 50.
In the end, she got her wish, and the result was a disaster just waiting to happen. Soon, the groom was at his station and the bride started her entrance. However, she bumped into the table, causing molten wax and flames to tumble to the floor. We scrambled to cover it with a carpet, but it was quickly degraded by the fire and we had to resort to a fire extinguisher.
Through all this, she continued walking. It wasn't until she was on the altar that someone noticed smoldering embers on her dress. In a quick attempt to lighten the mood, the groom smothered the fire and quipped, "I've always told you, you're smokin’ hot". This comment got me, and many others, chuckling.
However, the bride did not find it amusing. The event was inevitably postponed and rescheduled at a different location. Later, the bride attempted to hold us accountable for the fire and wriggle out of compensating the hospital for the unused food and staff. I couldn't help but feel sympathetic towards the groom.
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44. Jailhouse Rockin’ Reception
One of my closest pals found his future wife through a correspondence program for inmates. He was serving time due to a series of misconducts within a year. I dropped in on him a couple of times, during which he mentioned her, but it didn't strike me as anything serious.
Astonishingly, three days post his release, he gave me a jingle at 2 am, announcing his wedding plans and asking me to show up downtown the next morning as his witness. Truthfully, I thought he was pulling my leg, but the following morning proved otherwise.
Since we resided in Vegas, they decided to do the cliche Vegas chapel thing with a drive-thru wedding, officiated by an Elvis doppelganger. My friend was tremendously hungover, interrupting the proceedings twice to rush out and throw up on the sidewalk.
The whole scenario was simultaneously laugh-out-loud funny, pitiful, melancholic, and peculiar.
45. The Groomsman Elevated This Wedding
The bride, groom, and their whole wedding crew were perched on a high stage, in full sight of all the guests. The bride's father was in the middle of delivering a speech at the head of the elevated table where they were gathered.
Out of nowhere, the groomsman seated beside the best man suddenly spewed his guts over the edge of the table, barely missing the father. However, his troubles were far from over. In his desperate attempt to dash to the bathroom, he tumbled off the other side of the stage and ended up vomiting all over the floor, while squirming in agony.
46. Winter Wedding Woes
A few of my pals had already tied the knot at the local courthouse, but were keen to throw a full-blown party to celebrate. I began to feel uneasy when the bride insisted on an outdoor reception in Virginia, in the midst of January, under open-sided tents. I warned her, "January is icy," but she was determined to use space heaters.
With no walls on the tents, the heaters would be just about as effective as a chocolate teapot. The best part was still to come, though. On the big day, a severe storm arrived that ended up flattening one tent under the weight of the snow, and the wind nearly carried away the other one. As a result, they moved the whole wedding party into the groom's aunt's cluttered home.
So there you have it—the bride, all dolled up in her gorgeous wedding dress, ended up having her picture taken against a backdrop of boxes overflowing with junk.
47. This Wedding Was Subpar
I once had the duty of being a groomsman at a wedding that took place within a golf course setting. The trick was that the chapel was uniquely situated in the heart of the course, only reachable by descending in an elevator from the clubhouse.
The group of groomsmen, including me, had spent hours before the event enjoying drinks at the clubhouse, which, as you'd guess, made us lose track of time. So, when the wedding hour approached, we were lagging a bit behind schedule.
Our trek to the chapel took a strange turn when the elevator, carrying ten groomsmen and the groom, got stuck halfway down. We reached out for help, only to be informed that the mechanic wasn't currently available, causing a delay. This news didn't sit well with everyone, particularly one groomsman who sufffered from claustrophobia.
An hour passed in increased tension, squeezed together and growing increasingly uncomfortable—everybody needed to use the restroom urgently. One of my pals thought on his feet, using his empty flask as a makeshift bathroom, much to our relief. One can imagine the atmosphere in the elevator after that episode.
Relief eventually came in the form of the mechanic, who managed to get the elevator moving again. Upon reaching ground level, we flew across the golf course towards the nearest restroom. We were already an hour late, but the worst was yet to come.
In our dash towards relief, disaster struck. An off-course golf ball smacked the groom in the head, causing him to fall over, yelling out in pain. There he lay, dazed and bleeding from the head. We hastily dialed his dad, who was waiting at the chapel.
Around the same time, the guilty golfer drove by asking after our well-being before driving off, leaving behind eleven slightly inebriated guys and one with a serious head injury. In response to the crisis, the groom's father came rushing over to take his injured son to the emergency room. Unfortunately, the wedding had to be called off.
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48. Boomerang Bride
I attended a wedding where the groom had been with a girl for around six years. After their break-up, he was tying the knot with his rebound six months later. It felt like a recipe for disaster right from the start. When the invitations were sent out, people thought he was marrying his former longtime girlfriend.
It was quite a surprise when they arrived at the church and didn't recognize the bride. The wedding was incredibly lavish with around 200 guests. The whole time, the bartender was inappropriately trying to flirt with the groom's 14-year-old sister by offering her drinks.
I was stuck sitting with the groom's not-so-bright college friends at the reception. And if that wasn't enough, we were expected to take photos in the four-hour gap between the ceremony and the reception. No food was served until the wedding party showed up. Not surprisingly, the newlyweds parted ways within a year or two.
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49. Indecent Proposal
When I turned 18, my elder brother was set to marry a wonderful woman, sparking excitement all around when they broke the happy news. The wedding day finally arrived, unfolding beautifully—from the stunning bride to the tear-jerker vows. It all seemed perfect until we moved on to the reception.
I was a bridesmaid, my elder sister had the role of maid of honor, while her boyfriend held the title of best man. I gave a heartfelt speech, exiting the stage for him to take the spotlight. His few words were soon followed by an unexpected invitation to my sister to join him on stage. She seemed unsure, but I reassured her it'd be fine.
On stage, her boyfriend switched gears, dropping to one knee, professing his love for her, and brandishing a ring. The guests reacted angrily, crimson-faced and shocked. My father stood up, his fists clenched tight. My mom and sister both broke down crying. Other guests were quick to lash out at him.
My sister expressed her fury about his tactless proposal on such an important day. In summary, she ended their relationship and he was promptly kicked out of the reception.
50. You’ve Got Mail
Once, I went to a wedding that seemed to go pretty well. The party was fun, and though a few folks had a little too much to drink, everything else was exactly how you'd expect a wedding party to be. However, a few days later, we all got a weird letter. It was filled with complaints about the behavior of the guests.
The bride and groom had obviously spent a good chunk of time hashing out everything they thought went wrong that day. And guess what? They sent it as a formal complaint to all the guests. The issue was, most of the complaints were about minor stuff and, in many cases, just rumors.
This led to a ton of heated phone calls between guests and even more peevish letters fired back in reply. Nowadays, all we recall from that wedding is that awkward aftermath. And it's since become known as "the wedding we dare not speak of".
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