Is there anything we’re more attached to than our technology? Whether we’re in Zoom meetings with clients, calling home to speak with loved ones, or metaphorically arm wrestling our credit card providers, our phones have become our second selves. So who’s to blame when things go wrong—us or our phones? Either way, after reading these Redditors' wild tales you’ll be triple checking to make sure one of you actually hung up.
1. Honesty Is The Best Policy
Once upon a time, I was a secretary in an office that weirdly received a ton of butt dials. One time, I had a front row seat to a drama where a boss from New York completely read his worker the riot act. The worker snapped, "Well what the heck can I do about it?" The boss's reply? Pure gold: "Honestly Tom, if I wasn't dating your sister, you'd be out the door already".
2. Think Of The Children
So, one time I went over to my friend's place to borrow her novelty phallic cake pans for a bachelorette. We were just sitting there, chit chatting about 'em - she had a couple of different sizes, so there were some pretty funny exchanges... But then, I made a mortifying realization. I'd been sitting on my cell and had accidentally dialed the kid's emergency helpline.
It was because of my job at the Child Protection Agency, I had the number on speed dial. Yeah, it was mega awkward.
3. Troubleshooting
So, I work with this dude who used to be at an IT helpdesk. He had this thing where he would mute his microphone, swear up and down at the person he was on the phone with, and then go back to being super professional like nothing happened. I knew it was just a matter of time before he pressed the wrong button.
Then one day, we're in a meeting over the phone. There's me, him, someone from another company, and one of our company's bigwigs. After a while, we decide to wrap it up for the day and try again the next day. Out of nowhere, we hear him cussing like a sailor. Then there's just dead silence. The bigwig is like, "what was that?" After a moment, the guy just disappears from the call and we’re left apologizing for his outburst.
But it didn't stop there. The next day, he waltzes into the office spinning this incredible tale about spilling scalding coffee on his leg and dropping his pants right outside his car. To prove it, he shows off this major coffee burn on his leg. What's weird is, he was on the phone with us for like, four hours, sitting in his car, and not near a fresh pot of joe. So, if there was any coffee with him, it would have been cold by then.
I think he knew he messed up, went home, and made it look like he got hurt to avoid getting into trouble.
4. Of Angels and Demons
I once had a job where I had the power to write-off big phone bills in the right circumstances. A customer once told me her mom was dying abroad. Her mom had dementia and only trusted her daughter's voice, even more than the doctor's advice. She was really upset, saying if she could afford the phone bill, she could've just flown home, which was cheaper.
True that. So, I canceled her whole phone bill. She thanked me like I'd just saved her life, straight out of a movie scene, saying I was a heaven-sent angel. After we finished, I wished her a good night. Then came the final twist: She thought we hung up, but I heard her say to someone else, in a totally normal voice, "Well, that worked"!
5. Silent As A Fish
An author visited my daughter's school virtually to read The Pout-Pout Fish. The school thought it would be fun to include the kids towards the end of the reading. The plan was to get everyone to say "blub blub blub" when cued. They prepped the kids for this moment.
When it was time for the kids to chime in, the person in control of the meeting unmuted all 300 children at once. What followed was total chaos - 300 kids shouting "BAAAAHHHAAA BLUUUUBB AAAAAAAAHHHHHH SKKKKRREEEEEE FFFIIIISSSHHHHHH BBLLLUUUUUUBBBB”, until they were promptly muted again.
6. Kiss And Tell
I butt-dialed a buddy, leaving a two and a half minute voicemail of me and my kiddo horribly belting out Prince's "Kiss". But it's even worse than it sounds: This buddy, who's a DJ, remixed it into a five-minute track. Somehow, it landed in my coworker's hands and the "hit" spread like wildfire.
7. Fluent Sarcasm
A while back, I was at a meeting with some business partners from a Japanese company. In a design meeting, one of them spoke in Japanese, probably thinking we couldn't understand. Out of nowhere, one of our artists, a guy who looked like a big-time rapper from the 90s, answered in fluent Japanese. I wish you could see the looks on their faces.
Turns out the Japanese guy had said, "I can't stand these guys, why do we keep working with them?" And Trev, our artist, replied something like, "I get why, just look at us". Good times!
8. How To Lose 150 Pounds In One Day
Back in the day when Facebook was new, my ex-father-in-law was just getting into it, reconnecting with long-lost pals. He was having a blast, spying on who had packed on pounds, who'd split up, and who was rolling in the dough. He got one of his friends' numbers and decided to give him a call. There was no answer, so he left a voicemail.
His message was something like, “Hey, Bill. Long time no see. Let’s catch up. Hit me back”, and then thought he ended the call. As a joke, he added, “Heard you’ve turned a bit chunky”! Quickly glancing down, he was horrified to see the call didn’t end and his teasing joke was captured in the voicemail. It was probably like, “….and I heard you got chunky!….oh snap! Holy moly, it didn’t hang up. Oh dang, it’s still recordi….click”.
As far as I know, ol' Bill didn’t call him back.
9. Budding Bromance
Few years back, my boss and I were in our work truck when he was talking to this dude on speakerphone. I could hear the whole convo. Guy ends the call saying, "Okay, love you. Bye" - you know, kinda like he does with his kids. Now here's the killer part: My boss, without missing a beat, goes "Love you, too, brother. Bye".
Sign up to our newsletter.
History’s most fascinating stories and darkest secrets, delivered to your inbox daily. Making distraction rewarding since 2017.
10. Karen Mode Enabled
So one time, one of my least favorite patients from the dental clinic called me. She was always blaming us for something - even when she was just checking if we're open. After we chatted, she rang again, but I was already dealing with another patient.
Then I noticed her call lasted for quite some time... like she left a five-minute message or something? And sure enough, there was this long voicemail of her strolling around a supermarket with her kid, as she unknowingly dialed me from her pocket.
I listened to the whole message. What she said blew my mind. She was bad-mouthing our clinic, but ironically she kept pointing out how we do so much for her: "They supposedly fixed the issue just because they tried to reach me three times when I didn't even bother replying back".
Clearly, we've gone the extra mile for her, but she was still not pleased. She thought it made us look incompetent. Finally, after a year, she switched to another dentist. We sent her records, including X-rays, as they had asked. And then, she complained about that new dentist too.
I'm not really sure why, but she called the state board, who then asked us for our records. In times like these, you need to present everything or else it looks like you're hiding stuff. So I knew just what to do. Luckily, I had kept that voicemail, converted it to an mp3, and shipped it on a thumb drive along with everything else.
Can't say if they bothered listening to her ranting about the quality service she got, but her complaint with the state board was eventually dismissed.
11. The Call Is Coming From Inside The House
So, my friend invited me over for a ladies' hangout at her place. She's got a kid, so when I biked over, and it was past his bed time, I didn't want to ring the doorbell. Called her up on her cell to let me in, but there was just...nada.
So, after a painfully long wait and no answer, I went with the gentle knock approach. It worked! She lets me in, and as per girls' night tradition, we start partying. Later, my friend checks a voicemail she’s received. She listens to it, goes stark white, swears, and cranks up the volume.
And, wow. It's some disturbingly loud huffing and puffing—someone was getting it on, and they sounded really into it. We were both shook. Like, who does that? Was it intentional, or was it some creep dialing numbers at random?
After a funny debate, she decides to return the call. She's too freaked to chat up our mystery caller, and I, being the courageous friend that I am, decide to give the perv a piece of my mind. She tossed me the phone, call already going through. The room’s dead silent. Everyone is anxious. My heart was racing like a wild horse.
Then it happened.
It starts to ring... and, get this, my very own cell phone lit up. The dots started to connect. Apparently, the call I made at the door did connect to her voicemail right after I biked over for half an hour and hauled myself up four flights of stairs.
Guess my tired panting was creepily similar to someone's good-time noises. Who knew!
12. That’s Wassup
During my time as an exchange student in Germany, I needed my mom to ring up my university's housing department back home for me. We were sorting out my dorm room for the upcoming year because you couldn't do it online back then, and their on-hold times were infamous. The cost of a call from Germany to the university was sky-high, so my mom dialed them up for me.
My mom told them that I was studying overseas, but when the housing department lady put my mom on hold to look into my lodging assignment, she forgot to mute the call. My mom overheard her saying, "This lady is calling for her kid. When will these parents let their kids grow up and handle their own business?"
She came back on the line and informed my mom that I didn't get either of my top two building choices, oblivious to the fact my mom had been listening the whole time. Guess who miraculously got their top choice for building and room when they returned?
13. A Creature Of Habit
On one of my calls in the call center, I got an old lady on the line who sounded really sweet but a bit low. When I made my offer, she goes, "Nah, it's just not the right time" real nice-like. We both say our goodbyes, but while I'm trying to hang up, I noticed she's still on the line. That's when things got super eerie.
She walks a bit, sounds like she's near a sink because I can hear water running, then she started talking to herself. And it's only that one sentence she keeps repeating like she's practicing it: "Nah, it's just not the right time". She keeps repeating that in the same tone for like two minutes before I got too creeped out and couldn't listen anymore.
14. Let Them Eat Cake
I'm at the hospital and just last week, the operator was chatting with somebody at 3 in the morning. She had no idea her whole conversation was being heard all over the hospital through the loudspeaker. It went something like "Can you believe the nurses got silly cupcakes for Nurses Week? They should've got a bonus instead".
I almost laughed my pants off, but that woman? She was absolutely right.
15. Beyond Tasteless
Once, a call center lady phoned me. Her voice suggested she enjoyed her food quite a bit, you could even hear her puffing a bit. Long story short, the call wrapped up, but I didn't hang up, figuring they'd do it. They didn't. Instead, I overheard this woman chatting with her colleagues about fried liver and onions.
Her enthusiasm was... let's say intense. To the point of being gross, actually. Apparently, she eats it every day. She was even making weird slurping sounds and humming. Oh man, it was so gross listening to someone describing food like that.
16. She Who Shall Not Be Named
My grandpa was chatting on the phone with his mom, and her sister was next to her. When she thought she ended the call, she said, "Love you, bye". But she didn't hang up. Her sister asked, "You don't actually love him, right?" And she replied, "Nope." Brutal.
She lived longer than her kids, and even though she's gone now, I don't really think of her as my great-grandma.
17. The Math Ain’t Mathing
On my 21st birthday, I got super drunk. At the end of the night, I stumbled to the skytrain and spotted this incredible 10-foot tall stone abacus. When I was that smashed, of course, the first thought was to mess around with this cool contraption. Terrible choice. It ended up smashing my hand and broke my fingernail.
Did I need a doctor? Not a chance! I hopped onto the train, my hand bleeding badly. A random guy gave me a glove to wrap up the injury, and after that, things got kinda hazy. Turns out, I had accidentally called my significant other when I sat down on the train. He overheard people trying to help me while I yelled, "Don't trust the abacus! Do NOT trust the Abacus"!
This went on for quite a while until eventually, I started telling folks I'd hurt my hand in the war. What's the lesson here? Never trust the abacus.
18. The Way Of The Dododo
So, I was working one day and using our voip software. I had to leave a voicemail for a client about data conversion stuff. After I left the message, I goofed up and thought I had hung up. Thought I was off the hook, I started belting out "Mana Mana Doo Doo Dododo", you know, that classic Jim Henson song. It was not until later that I realized the call was still on.
Fast forward to the next day. I plugged in to check the conversion voicemails. And surprise, surprise! The client had left me a voicemail-back. All professional and business-like, he left his contact info and wished me a great day. Then, after a brief pause, guess what? He started singing the same Jim Henson song. He even began where I had left off on my accidental performance.
Man, I couldn't help but crack up. It really made my workday.
19. Pulling Double Duty
So, I got a pretty hilarious voice message from my grandma. She was just asking for her dessert dish back, but the three-minute-long voicemail turned into something a bit more entertaining. Right when she thought she hung up, she put the phone down and called my grandpa over.
He's like, "I'm about to fart. Maybe not the best time", which set my grandma off. She was like, "You marked up the couch last time and I just cleaned it". He claimed he was wearing pants and she's like, "okay, wear two pairs this time then".
My girlfriend and I were in stitches, nearly marking our own car seats with laughter. As bonkers and gross as it might seem, I saved the voice message. After all, it's a funny memory of them I'll hold onto.
20. Unfinished Business
Back in my army days, I managed to grab a minute for a phone call with my girl. It was a good chat. She updated me on her life, and we looked forward to some time together during my upcoming leave. After saying our goodbyes, I hung on to the line to prevent any hassle from the next guy wanting the phone.
That's when my world turned upside down. An unexpected conversation broke in from her end. Another guy: "So, when's he coming home?" Her: "In a couple of weeks, we've got time".
Him: "You'll break up with him by then, right?" Her: "Absolutely!" I was devastated. I hung up and decided to cut all ties to her during my leave. Found out later that she'd been two-timing me with this guy for a long time.
Fast forward several years, I was out getting pizza with my kid when I saw her at a shopping complex. She was standing next to an SUV, looking stupefied at me. I just waved and went on with my day, and that was the end of the story.
21. A Slow Burn Romance
So, my uncle, who happens to be a woodworker, got hitched again—some lady with an undeserved sense of superiority. Turns out, her mom was living the snug life in this spankin' new home my uncle built with his own two hands.
One eventful day, the mom rang my uncle at work—a log had slipped out of their fireplace. He suggested she either chuck it back in or douse the darn thing. But, apparently, this simple request was mission impossible for her. Instead, she jammed his voicemail box with frantic messages about this stubborn burning log. I bet you can imagine where this went...
By the time my uncle wrapped up work and bolted back home, his sparkling new house was just a smoky ruin—total goner.
Let me give you some perspective: The rogue log rolled onto a hardwood floor, and those panicky voicemails? They lasted for a good 20 minutes! I never even got the chance to check out the house. Then, Uncle's drama queen wife disappeared, but not without snatching a significant slice of his hard-earned savings.
22. In Praise Of Silence
I got in touch with the tech support line for a job-related problem. It was obvious the support agent was working from home, judging by the sound of a dog whimpering somewhere in the background. After sorting out my error code, we both said our goodbyes. However, just before I managed to hang up, I overheard him cooing, "Who's a good boy! Are you a good boy?"
In response, I whispered, "I am". A bout of laughter came through the phone, followed by an "I'm so sorry!", before he hung up. I felt a bit let down. I had hoped to hear more of his pup...
23. Elective Amnesia
I was on a call but wasn't on camera because I only had to listen in. In a rush, I thought it'd be a good idea to take my phone into the shower so I could keep up with the call while I prepared for another meeting. Unfortunately, my RingCentral app glitched and, surprise, my camera and audio were both on. I realized something was off when I heard, "Is that a shower running in the background?"
A good-sport coworker quickly disconnected me. But, the real kicker came afterward when I chatted with her - turns out everyone got a glimpse of my bare chest. I was beyond mortified.
24. Bored Silly
So, I was part of this online interview where we were chilling in a conference room with dual screens - one projecting the interviewee and the other, us. Close to wrapping up the interview, I spotted my boss pulling off some weird neck twitch.
He'd be all focused on the screen, then outta the blue, he'd swivel his head sideways and then back again. As the interview was drawing to a close, and we were all tossing out polite thank yous and goodbyes, I nudged my boss and asked if he was alright. His response, loud enough for the mic to catch was, "Try moving real fast, you'll catch a glimpse of your own ear"!
So yeah, our job offer didn't fly but hey, this funny memory sure makes me laugh!
25. Swatter No Swatting
Back when I was working at an emergency call center, I got this call that was clearly trying to trick the cops into showing up somewhere (a prank called "swatting"). The guy on the call was describing this terrible scene, but it was quiet in the background, he was speaking all casual-like, and his location wasn't anywhere near where he said the incident was.
Still, I made two calls — one to the location he gave me, just in case he wasn't lying. The other call was to where his phone's location actually was, just to make sure we covered all bases and properly looked into what seemed like a fake situation. Anyway, he hangs up on me, saying it's not safe for him to stay on the call.
Then, I hear some sounds like his phone's in his pocket and the same guy talking in the background. He's laughing and gabbing about how "that girl Anna is gonna get a shock when the cops show up, guns drawn". He didn't intend for me to hear that. But karma had other plans.
The cops found him pretty quick since the area he actually called from didn't have many people around. Gotta say, hearing the guy freak out at the sight of red and blue lights outside his house gave me a good chuckle.
26. Bless Your Heart
So, here's the deal: I'm from the Deep South and yes, I've got a pretty thick accent. One time, I was on the phone with one of our suppliers in NYC, on hold, but not enough to miss one of the sales reps making fun of how I talk. I mean, they were really laying it thick, laughing up a storm, the whole nine yards. When they got back on the phone, I just let them know, in my sweetest Southern drawl, "Y'all are fired," and hung up.
My boss agreed. Turns out, that little stunt cost the company a pretty penny. Moral of the story? Don't mess with the people putting food on your table.
27. A Good Mind Boggling
So, get this. In the old days, I had a gig at a telemarketing place. One time, I'm chatting with this customer who sounds a bit out of breath but is trying to act cool, like everything's normal. Anyway, once we finish our talk, it all clicks - the guy thought he hung up, but he hadn't. He starts having this racy chat with his partner, and I can hear it all.
They clearly just kept on with whatever they were doing before the phone rang. But what gets me is - why did the guy even pick up the call in the first place?
28. Girl In Progress
I've got this friend who's a blast but also a total flake. Her brother and another one of our friends were dating and living in Thailand. That friend came back home for a while but was supposed to leave the next day. We all decided to meet up.
Well, miss flake said she’d come, but no surprise, she bailed. I called her, but it went to voicemail. I thought I hung up, but here comes my goof up. I accidentally left a voicemail saying, “She always pulls this. I bet she shows up 1 out of 3 times we plan anything”. I was mortified—but things ended up working out.
A year later, she told me that she got my message and was thankful because she didn’t realize how much she'd been ditching us. That wake-up call had her thinking. After that incident, she started being more reliable. She even mentioned it helped with her depression. Yeah, I was embarrassed, but I’m thankful things turned out well.
29. There, There
After I quit, I caught my boss chatting to his daughter: "He's bummed to lose me as his manager, I can tell".
He was OK as a boss, and I never really said anything about his leadership style, good or bad.
30. Coming Soon To A Pocket Near You
So my mom and dad are split and each of them has remarried. When I was 17, I stayed with my mom and used to hang out with my dad on weekends. I kinda had a hunch that my dad and his new wife were trying for kids, but they never really talked to me about it. One day, I get a random pocket-dial from my dad as they were spilling the beans about the baby to my stepmom's folks.
I picked up and heard my step-grandma saying, "Wow, thrilled for you guys!" I listened for a bit and managed to piece together what the hullabaloo was about. Dad and stepmom finally let me in on the baby news the next time we met and I played along, pretending to be shocked.
I didn't want to spoil their moment, so I stayed mum about my eavesdropping episode. I only spilled the beans years later, revealing how I got to know about my future little bro from dad's unlucky pocket-dial.
31. Kind Of A Pig Deal
So, I remember this one time when a construction worker had to join a morning call with a client while he was in a portable loo. He completely missed one huge detail though. Unaware that his phone's camera was on, he stood up post-business and ended up flashing his "goods" to around 20 people. Not ideal!
32. Well, This Is Awkward
The last time I joined a secret group call was back in middle school. My friend was dating this dude, Brian, and I was super into his friend. Her plan was like, "Let's call Brian! You stay quiet and I'll casually drop your name to see if his friend's into you!"
Looking back, I should've realized that was a risky gamble. It could've crushed me big time. Well, it didn't even go that far - something even worse hit the fan. The moment he picked up, he told my friend it's over, they're done. I quietly listened on the other end as my friend's tears and pleas filled my ear until the cringe-factor maxed out and I had no choice but to end the call.
33. Did I Stutter?
I once worked at a call center, not the best gig, but eh, it was a job. The phones had two key buttons - hold that puts callers on a music-filled wait, and mute that drowns us out while still hearing the caller. I had this one call where a lady just wouldn't stop venting.
At one point, thinking I'd hit mute, I dramatically banged my head on the desk and mimicked Jim Carrey in Dumb and Dumber, saying "Oh god, I just don't care!!" To my shock, she responds, "I know you don't care, but I'm telling you anyway!"
Caught off guard, all I could think was, "Woops". Despite my slip-up, she didn't seem bothered and rounded off the call with, "Okay, thanks again. Bye", then she hung up. It was an unusual experience, but oddly hilarious!
34. I, Object
I was wrapping up work in a compact office, where we used radios to chat with our on-field team. Our assistant manager got a call from our new bank rep, who was incredibly good looking. This was our downfall.
The assistant manager paused the phone chat to relay the banker's question to our boss over the radio. The boss asked, "That's from our new banker?" When the assistant manager confirmed it was, the boss made a crude joke, saying, "Tell her if she'll do a favor, I'll give her a ride home" He found it hilarious, laughing out loud!
The assistant manager tried to hit the hold button, but unfortunately, it was way too late.
35. Oh My Cod
In middle school, my then-bestie pulled a year-long trick on me that I fell for hook, line, and sinker. She said her brother, who'd seen me at school, was crushing on me. She was really convincing when she put on this boyish voice and pretended he'd taken over the phone whenever I rang up.
While her actual sisters lived with their mom, she lived with her grandparents. So, when I dropped by, I never saw this brother and never doubted anything.
One evening, things with this made-up brother started to heat up — I've always been a hopeless romantic, can't deny. Suddenly, he tried to quickly wrap up the call. Thinking he'd successfully hung up, I heard my friend say, "Phew, dodged a bullet there. She almost caught me".
After that, I didn't talk to her for a good few months. But later, I found out there was even more to this story. Given some subsequent incidents, I started to suspect that she was perhaps a lesbian who'd been crushing on me, however, she was in denial. It's been ages and I've no idea where she is now. I haven't heard from her in years.
36. Task Failed Successfully
A bit ago, my grandad accidentally called me from the fast-food drive-thru. It was honestly cute. He was a newbie at using a phone, didn't have a clue. It was a shocker to see a voicemail from him. It's just him ordering a big mac, fries, and a coke, lasting two minutes. But he left us months later and I sometimes play it back when I miss him.
37. Come Acid Rain Or Shine
So there I was, in a drive-thru carwash. I accidentally pocket-dialed this girl I was kinda into and ended up leaving a long voicemail without realizing it. The worst part? I was mumbling a play-by-play of the whole carwash process, out of this old habit from when I was a kid.
Imagine me saying something like, "Whoa, here come the hula dancers... It's raining! No, it's a monsoon... Look out! Those twirly Russian hats are attacking the car... Alright, drying time! Nothing like some hot wax to make you sparkle"! The next thing I know, she thinks I'm tripping in a laundromat. I swear, the truth was even more embarrassing.
38. Let There Be Life
I accidentally said something weird to a customer over the phone when I thought I'd hung up. Basically, I said, "We'll be making babies tonight, come hang". Out of context, it totally gave off vibes like I was inviting them to a weird adult bash, where we'd spin a risky wheel that might leave my wife pregnant.
My customer responded with, "Umm...sounds like a blast, but I'll pass". I wish they knew the actual backstory. What I meant was that I was inviting one of my uni students, who wanted to skip school, to our biology lab. We were studying meiosis by mixing miniature cardboard chromosomes to create "full humans" with varied alleles.
Yup, it didn't exactly sound like that to my customer at all. But it gave me a good laugh.
39. I Love You, I Hate You
Once, we were onboarding a guy who was pretty average and was about to be hitched. In the middle of the interview process, his phone accidentally dialed our HR dude, smack dab in the middle of a wild argument with his boyfriend during the wee hours.
It had everything - shouting, sobbing, glass shattering, allegations, and even an "I love you" thrown in the mix. We still brought him on the team and never mentioned overhearing that spat, but I reckon the possible mortification of that incident was punishing enough.
40. Where Credit Is Due
Once upon a time at a hospital, someone goofed big-time on the loudspeaker. Instead of hanging up after an announcement, they went ahead and ordered a pizza on blast! Not just that, they even rattled off their credit card info for all to hear. But that wasn't the end of it - they forgot yet again to cut the call and ended up sharing patient details on the clinic's PA.
I dunno how it all lasted with nobody stepping in to stop the hot mess. But I've gotta say, that's some pretty weird stuff right there. Can't help but feel sorry for the person who messed up, and especially for the patient whose info was blabbed out so publicly.
41. A Too Close Call
I was on deck to give a speech to around 100 workers in a small event hall. The previous speaker finished her talk and hightailed it off the stage and out of the room, forgetting to hand me her mic. Not a problem because my voice is pretty loud. I barely started my talk when we all heard it.
A very loud...bathroom break came over the PA system, followed by a big sigh and the speaker's voice saying, "That was close". We had to listen to the sound of the toilet flushing three times - each time more embarrassing than the last. Eventually, she walked back in and nonchalantly sat down, still wearing her switched-on mic.
42. The Pint Of No Return
Once, while my husband and I were crashing at his folks' place, my trucker dad-in-law came in from a long trip. Before heading home, he stopped at the local bar to chill out. As he did, he dialed up my mother-in-law on speakerphone while she was busy cooking dinner.
Once he hung up, we heard him announce, "Done with the call. Attention, everyone! I've got a grand in my pocket, and it's my treat!" We all froze as the words sunk in. Mom-in-law calmly put her spatula down, strolled into the home office, and picked up their business phone. Meanwhile, dad-in-law was just rambling away like always.
She rang the bar, made sure he got the message - "Your wife's on the phone". Staying cool as a cucumber, she told him, "Better come back with $950 in your pocket or don't bother coming home. And, by the way, hang up your phone".
Once she tapped off, laughter took over. She was in stitches, tears streaming down her face. We didn't hear any complaints when he got home, so I guess he kept his word. My mother-in-law had this amazing calmness throughout the entire thing, and then the moment the call ended – boom! – total madness. Goodness, I miss those laughs. Rest peacefully, Mom.
43. Mea Culpa
One time while I was deep in a game of Destiny, I got a ring from my mom. Unknowingly, I answered the call and carried on chatting about "this lady being a real pain". Her response? Total heartbreak. When I moved the phone closer, all I heard was her quiet voice saying, "Sorry. I just wanted to see how your day was".
For some reason, it slammed like a train and I found myself crying. I'm so sorry, mom.
44. The Wonderful Pharaoh Of Oz
A couple years back, I was in Italy trying to scrape by with freelance gigs - which was a total bust. I was desperate, shooting off applications left and right when this super vague job listing came up. I had a Skype interview locked in and figured, why not? It wasn't even five minutes into the chat when it hit me like a ton of bricks - tiptop pyramid scheme, no doubt about it.
As the dude finished his spiel, I just went "Nuh-uh" and cut him off. The weird part? He didn't end the call properly or maybe it was a Skype glitch - your guess's as good as mine. Anyway, he was still in sight, obviously bummed out. To top it off, I could still hear noises from his side. Some grumpy-sounding old lady piped up from somewhere out of view.
The plot twist? She’d been there all along. The side-show sounded something like this. Her: "Didn't buy it, huh?" Him: "Nope". Then, the call finally went radio silent. Still cracks me up when I think about it.
45. An Unsubtle Bubble
My bro-in-law was gently reminded his job can still catch what he's saying even if the customer is on hold. This little incident happened when he decided to have a huge bong hit while a customer was waiting.
46. Time Is Money
So, a customer left a message about needing his meds topped up. He thought he'd ended the call, but he hadn't. What he did next was try to haggle over the price of the refill he'd just asked for.
47. Earth To Dad
My pops used to drive a coach bus. One day, he calls my sister and doesn't realize he left his phone on - it's just chillin' in his pocket while he's working. There's some tunes blasting in the bus from our favorite local station.
Anyway, dad is big into calling that station for quizzes and stuff. So my sister came up with a brilliant plan. She actually called up the station and somehow convinced the DJ to announce live: "Hey, bus-driver-Dad, switch off your phone!" Super weird, huh?
48. Beyond The Gyno Veil
Man, was it intense. So here's when I found out the gal I was seeing had terminal cancer, and I'm talking end-stage. She called me up before her "gyno appointment" and stashed her phone into her purse, but messed up a bit.
I swear, for half an hour I heard: "You've got a four-month countdown. No treatments left". She knew about it for three years but didn't seek treatment—believed essential oils could fix all, you know?
49. Prius At The Disco
So outta nowhere, I get this call from a chick who never actually dialed me up before - we just texted. Turns out, she butt-dialed me while driving with her mom, chatting about what she's gonna study at college. I was bored, so I just kicked back and listened for like seven minutes.
Later, I was gonna joke about how offbeat this whole thing was. But then things got freaky. There was this scream, screeching tires, and then a crash. The call cut off. I started panicking, it was so scary. I tried calling her back - straight to voicemail. Not a good sign.
After three tries, I was about to dial 911, when my phone buzzes. It's her. Texting me about a gnarly crash between a Prius and a tow truck. She tells me traffic's at a standstill and asks why I was bombarding her with calls. Man, was I relieved! But yeah, I'm not gonna forget that scare anytime soon.
50. Woman Overboard
A buddy of mine joined a virtual meeting with a couple of higher-ups and about 25 sales folks. Suddenly, everything went dead silent. They told him the meeting was cancelled and they were only talking about sales stuff. He pretended to leave but stayed on. That's when he uncovered the real deal.
These folks were plotting against their boss simply because she's a woman. They had a whole scheme ready to cause a big mess, aiming to cost the company big bucks. Their goal was to make it look like she was to blame and get her fired. They were dumb enough to do a final "are we all on board" check-in.
We worked at a call center, so his end of the convo was taped. Within a week, everyone involved got the boot and were replaced within a month.
Sources: Reddit,
