Every time the priest at a wedding says, “Does anybody object to this union,” there’s a pregnant pause in the crowd. But sometimes, a guest will suddenly burst up from their seats and voice their concern. As we’ll see in a few of these wacky stories from people who witnessed matrimonial objections first-hand, a third opinion is sometimes justified. Crash the altar with these wild stories about wedding guests who refused to forever hold their peace.
1. Sisters Don’t Need to Share Everything
The wife objected because she had just found out that her soon-to-be husband had been sleeping with her sister for the past eight years, despite the two of them having two kids.
2. With Mothers Like These, Who Needs Enemies?
At my (half) sister’s wedding, when they got to the objection part, her mother (same dad, different mum) leaned across to another family member and whispered, “Yeah, he isn’t good enough for her.” The officiant stopped the wedding and asked her to speak up, saying it’s a legal part of the wedding and if she has an objection then please state it loud enough for everyone to hear.
My sister’s mum laughed it off and sat down red-faced…while I glared evils into the back of this woman’s head. My sister is awesome, and the guy she’s with makes her super happy. At the reception, things got so much worse. In his speech, he thanked the mom for accepting him into the family and said how happy he was to have another mum (both his parents have died). Oof from me.
3. Betrayal Leaves a Bitter Taste
I wasn’t there, but an old friend told me about a wedding he attended a few years ago. When it came time for the objection part, a voice in the back yells “She sucked me like 30 minutes ago!” Bride bursts into tears. Groom just walks away.
4. Zeus Should Have RVSP-ed
My good friend’s wedding video is awesome! A big thunderstorm blew up during the ceremony and just as the minister asked, “Does anybody have any objections?” lightning strikes the church with a tremendous ka-boom and all the lights go out. There’s some nervous laughter, and the minister says, “That doesn’t count!” and the ceremony continues.
5. She’s Not Married to Any Options at This Point
The bride was cheating with this other guy at the time of her marriage. At the wedding, the guy she was secretly seeing objects to the ceremony, standing up and saying, “She’s been cheating on you with me.” The bride had a full on breakdown at the wedding, and then the groom dumped her. Everyone in my state knows her, so no one wants her. She ended up moving.
6. Let Them Eat Cake, At Least
I was at a friend’s wedding when his mother got up during the vows and said “Objection!” Everyone stared at her in confusion while she stood there staring at his soon-to-be wife. His mother then proceeded to say, “I don’t want my baby being with that rat for the rest of his life!” It was a total surprise, no one had any idea she felt that way.
Everyone just kind of sat there looking confused and shocked. Her son/my friend looked at her with a beet-red face and ran out of the church we were in. I guess he felt the same way but didn’t want to agree. Long story short, the bride ended up calling the wedding off, and they broke up. I didn’t even get a slice of cake. Good times.
7. ‘Til Debt (Paid) Do Us Part
From what I heard, a person in the bride’s group chat got into a big fight with the bride on the day of the wedding and ended up sending the groom’s father a bunch of horrifying screenshots. Apparently, the bride admitted that she was planning on divorcing the groom after he paid off all her student debts and bought a house, so that she could get the property in a divorce.
The bride tried to deny it, but I guess the groom had suspicions that she was just using him already. After he saw the proof, he called the wedding off. My friend, who invited me as her plus one, was super embarrassed, but I was thoroughly entertained.
A guy had been molesting some of the girls from the school where he was the after-school activity program director. The bride has a daughter herself and knew about some of the allegations but decided to marry him anyway (out of state). Well some of us were still invited and unbeknownst to the groom, a woman barges in cussing up a storm because her daughter is one of the ones that he molested and she’s in counselling because of it. He got off free.
It was a full out brawl. When intruder lady and a few others were arrested, the wedding was over. The bride ran off somewhere and I guess cried for the remainder of the evening. Worst part? She still married him but eloped somewhere private. It’s like they always say: if you don’t say where you’re getting married, your groom’s victims’ moms can’t crash the wedding.
9. But Who Will Rescue Her from Prince Charming?
We didn’t object, but it was hard to keep our mouths shut at my aunt’s wedding. She’d had a hard life. Her two daughters were mentally disabled to the point where they had to live in a care facility full time. Her first husband abused the girls and then killed himself. The only bright side was that he left her millions in real estate. But money can’t buy happiness.
When her second serious partner left her, she was lonely as heck. She was a smart lady but she still fell for this conman. He was after her money, which was supposed to be for the future care of the girls. He wasn’t allowed back in several countries because he had conned people out of so much money, and there was something very wrong with him mentally.
He claimed to be able to cure cancer and took cancer patients’ money and would stay in hotels then leave without paying. The whole family knew about his issues but he’d convinced my aunt that it was all lies and the world was against him. Anyhow, we were invited to the wedding. It sucked to watch her marry this trash fire but we needed her to know that we were on her side.
He’d already started to isolate her with ideas about how we weren’t good for her and she was pretty much under his control. Fast forward: five years later, he’s blown through most of her money. They did IVF and had a son, who is now eight. Con artist husband left when the money was gone so now she’s nearly 60, raising a child, and trying to rebuild bridges with her family and friends.
Kinda wish we had objected at the wedding, but she was set on her path, and other people like her parents had told her all the bad stuff they had found out about her husband and it hadn’t stopped her. Figured all we could do was be there for her.
10. Can’t Face the Facts
My cousin was getting married to this sweet guy. One of the groomsmen spent the entire ceremony facing the audience, with his back to the bride. He felt that my cousin was an overly judgmental succubus who would nag and belittle the groom for the rest of his life. Shouldn’t speak ill of family but, to be honest, he was absolutely right.
11. The Boy I Married
One of my oldest friends is getting married this evening and I’m one of her bridesmaids. It’s going to take everything I have not to object. I and all our friends (and seemingly even her parents??) can’t stand her husband-to-be. He’s a massive tool, and nobody can understand what she sees in him. He’s not abusive or anything, just relentlessly try-hard and annoying. He’s like the sheltered homeschool kid who enters the real world at age 21 and tries to adapt by acting all ‘street.’ He vapes indoors and makes offensive jokes and quotes things even 4chan would find 3edgy5me.
12. Marry Us, Marry the Drama
At the rehearsal dinner, my brother-in-law’s crazy ex somehow showed up. She started her insane tirade by saying that she forgave him for breaking up with her, and he seriously needed to stop trying to act like he moved on (him and my sister had been together for a couple of years and had been living together for at least two, like I’m pretty sure he ain’t faking it).
Then she decided to claim she was pregnant with his child. My brother-in-law proceeded to tell her that she was his greatest mistake, and that if she was pregnant it was probably her stepfather’s just like the last one. She claimed it was his and she got an abortion without telling him. Me and the Best Man kindly kept her away from the couple while the friend who owned the house the wedding was taking place at called the police because she refused to leave her property.
13. The Big Problems Start Out Small
My cousin had a rather extravagant wedding at an upscale golf course. I didn’t really want to go because I knew he’d hooked up with a friend in our group when he was engaged to the bride. But family pressure and an open bar persuaded me, and I’m darn glad I went. I knew it was going to be good when the girl he cheated with was there.
Anyway, we have a few drinks at the bar and head to our seats for the ceremony. Apparently, the girl he’d messed around with had gotten pretty wasted because at the moment of truth she yells, “I object your honor, that man’s parts are too small to satisfy; he is unfit for marriage!” like it was a court case. Everyone went silent for a second, and then I looked over at my buddy and we burst out laughing our butts off.
Bride was furious and slapped groom. They both cried, but after a brief break and conversation they decided to go through with it! Unsurprisingly they’re getting divorced after a solid two-year marriage…
14. Real Enough to Us
My friend was about to get married when a woman busted the doors down and screamed at the top of her lungs, “I’M THE REAL LEGAL WIFE, STOP THE WEDDING!!!” Amazing. The story even got picked up by local news.
15. Do Drink & Decide
I objected to my friend getting married during the ceremony. We were at the white chapel in Vegas with friends, and I had been drinking so she just laughed it off. Well, she told me later that she should have listened because her groom ended up back in prison. Surprisingly, doing the whole back and forth to jail thing didn’t make for a great marriage. Luckily, she’s with a great guy now.
16. If You Can’t Put a Ring on It, Then You Shouldn’t
I worked as a photographer at a wedding chapel on the Vegas strip. We had a young Chinese couple come in with their friends and get married. The minister did his normal speech, but when it came down to the vows, I could tell something was wrong. The groom kept putting the ring on the bride’s finger and taking it off hesitantly.
This went on for a few uncomfortable minutes. At one point, the groom asked the bride if there was someone else and she nodded her head. After a couple more awkward moments, the minister explained that if he did not pronounce them man and wife, it wouldn’t be legal. They decided not to get married. Their friends still bought the DVD though. That was one of my favorite moments working there.
17. The Best Objections Happen Early
Bride’s sister and cousin both objected because the bride had been messing around on the groom (and continued to do so for a few weeks before the wedding). The day before the wedding, they forced the bride to confess. Naturally there was no wedding the next day. From the outside, they did look like a good couple though.
18. The Laugh-Track Doesn’t Bode Well
I went to a wedding where the entire crowd laughed wildly when the question was asked. But they didn’t actually object. The bride and groom had both led, ahem, colorful lives.
19. I Now Pronounce You Man and Bait
When my mom got married to my stepdad, my uncle objected. After the attention was focused on him, he just asked if they were still going fishing afterwards. To which my stepdad reached into his suit and pulled out his fishing hat. It was very sweet and bromantic. They loved to fish together. RIP to the truest love between bros.
20. Get Your Own Punch-Drunk Love
I was working at a wedding when I was younger. I was running the bar at the reception, which was very close to the wedding hall. For this one wedding, we were told that the reception would start around 4PM. It was already about 3ish and I was packing fridges, the usual barman things, while one of the male guests sits around, already drinking.
I asked if he was not joining the reception, to which he replied something along the lines of “When I have the courage.” He downs his drink and leaves. 10 minutes later he’s back, looking extremely disappointed. Guy orders a drink, and less than 30 seconds later another guy who’s dressed extremely well (turned out to be the groom), walks in, punches him in the back of the head, and leaves.
This dude just picked his drink up and sipped it further. I eventually found out that the dude who downed his drink had walked into the reception and admitted to sleeping with the wife on her bachelorette and again the night before the wedding. He was never invited to the wedding; he just felt the groom needed to know. So, he found out where the wedding was, suited up, and dropped the info mid-ceremony.
21. Wedding Ring or Wrestling Ring?
This was in the early 70s in semi-rural Washington state. My cousin was getting married; my aunt and the mother of the groom did not get along well. During the ceremony, when the pastor got to the part about objecting, my aunt said something to my uncle. I couldn’t make out what it was but the groom’s mom jumped up and grabbed my aunt and they started going at it.
Soon, they were all the way out the door and into the parking area. They were separated, and everyone filed back into the barn, where the wedding continued. The best part though was when another one of my cousins simply walked into the woods after the wedding because that’s where he lived.
22. From the Mouths of Babes
My aunt was getting married to her second husband, and during the “speak now or forever hold your peace” bit, their baby started crying. The dude officiating it said, “If anyone older than six months has any objections, speak now or forever hold your peace.” He got a laugh and the wedding carried on. They’re still together 10 years later, so I guess whatever my cousin had to say was misinformed.
23. The Less Than Best Man for the Job
I was at my stepsister’s enormous rehearsal dinner. The minister was going over the vows quickly while giving instruction on what to do. When he said something about objections, the best man interrupted saying he had to put a stop to this. He was in love with the bride and was sure she felt the same way. My sister and everyone else were horrified. It caused plenty of chaos and confusion. As far as I know after that, neither the bride nor groom ever spoke to him again.
24. Is This an Altar or a Comedy Show?
My mom invited an ex she was still rather close with to her wedding. At the crucial moment, he stood up and yelled, “I object!!” Little did everyone at the wedding know, my dad had gotten rather close with him and paid him to stand up and object just for the laughs and giggles and he bursts out laughing. My mom didn’t find it as funny, and it really started their marriage off on the right foot.
25. Just Don’t Cosplay with My Heart
It was a medieval-themed wedding. The best man declared his love for the bride, challenged the groom to a fight for her love. They march outside, drew swords, and went at it. Apparently, they choreographed two nights a week for like six months, but it honestly looked like they were trying to kill each other. The groom wins and everything goes on like normal. Weird flex but pretty cool.
26. Stamping out the Naysayers
I attended a wedding as a guest of a family member. When the pastor asked if anyone objected, the doors busted open to the sanctuary and a man appeared and started to say “I do!” but two huge ushers, one who was my date, quickly grabbed the guy before he could say anything but “uhhh” under the arms and literally lifted him up off the floor and carried him out. The wedding continued as normal. Turns out the guy was the ex of the bride. Strangest sight I ever saw.
27. He Just Has High Hopes for the Couple
So, I’m attending this ultra-chill beach wedding in small town Canada. I don’t know anyone because it was my ex-step-aunt’s, so pretty distant family. It was fun anyways; the bride flew in on a seaplane and all the chairs were set up on the sand. Anyways, the groom is from Trinidad and Tobago, so all his relatives traveled a long way and had cool accents. It was good vibes all around.
As the ceremony progresses, everyone is watching, getting teary from the vows. Then the line comes “…any reason why these two should not be joined in holy matrimony, speak now.” Nobody expected this: the father of the groom gets up, flailing, and a collective gasp followed by silence overtakes this tiny venue.
We’re all waiting with bated breath, but he’s just standing there with glassy eyes. Turns out he was baked; this 70+ man in a suit and dreads laughs and says “No, I kid, I kid” and the whole spirit of the audience cheers up as he sits back down. Rest of the reception, people are going up to him saying “good one” or scolding him. Best wedding I’ve been to.
28. Don’t Go Off-Script
At my cousin’s wedding, during the vow exchange, my aunt shouted, “Wasn’t there supposed to be a part where you could object?”
29. A Door Long Open
One of my friends interrupted his cousin’s wedding to come out of the closet. But that’s not even the weirdest part. This was actually the second time my friend had come out to his family. The first time was when he was a teenager (about eight years earlier). Almost everyone at the wedding already knew. He couldn’t understand why people were so mad at him.
30. Addicted to You
When I was 13, I went to my second cousin’s wedding. Everything was going great… they even got past the “speak now or forever hold your peace” part. They wrote their own vows, but before my second cousin’s fiancé could even begin her vows, the groom’s son (from a previous relationship) got up and announced to the entire room that the bride was cheating on his dad with her dealer.
My second cousin yelled at his son to either sit down or leave. The son left, my second cousin married her anyways. Five years and one baby later, he finds out it was true, and they separated. They were too tweaked out to afford a divorce. Finally, he got engaged a third time but before he could get married, his ex-wife had to pay for their divorce. Yep, family dinners are a little awkward.
31. In This Case, First Is Probably the Worst
The groom’s dad interrupted the wedding to ask the bride’s father whether or not she was truly a virgin. Then he went on about how he didn’t know anything about the wedding and blah blah blah. Truly weird and embarrassing. When the groom’s father interrupted the wedding, the bride’s father (officiating the wedding) did in fact say it was confirmed.
I have no clue how or what. They seemed to be super conservative and wore sleeved dresses, long hair, etc. They eventually showed the father-in-law out and continued the ceremony, which was super awkward afterwards. It was literally as if I was on Punk’d. I’d gone with a boyfriend. After seeing what his family was like, I did not stay in that relationship for much longer.
32. A Hell out of Hog Heaven
My cousin had her enormous wedding on a farm with a huge pig roast. Her father and my other older cousin never really got along. At one point during the reception, my older cousin had enough and absolutely lost it. He looked at a handful of us and asked if we had his back. Of course, we all nodded not really knowing what was about to happen.
He disappeared and a few minutes later comes back with a 20lb bag of pork meat from the leftover roast. He walks down to where my cousin’s dad is (my aunt proceeds to yell, Lonnie NO!!!) and smacks him right in the side of the face with the bag of meat. An all-out family brawl ensued. The whole family hasn’t been invited to a wedding ever since.
33. Have a Rescue Boat Just in Case
I was getting married along a river at the end of summer. On the day of the ceremony, tons of wake boarders and boats were out. I was a ball of nerves and the ceremony felt so serious…when all of a sudden, some dude bro on a boat blasting music screamed “Don’t do it bro!!” and sped off. It was actually hilarious and made the rest of the ceremony a lot more fun. My husband and I cracked up, even though his brothers looked like they were about to jump in the river after the guy!
34. Cupid’s Arrow Lands Too Late
I saw a random guest stand up and declare his love for the bride. He poured his heart out, saying that it should’ve been him up on the altar that day. The whole room went dead silent, the bride went pink with embarrassment and groom went red with anger. The best man promptly called for DJ/MC to start playing music. All this was in front of the random guest’s wife. Didn’t go down to well.
35. Blast With the Past
I once went to a wedding where both families were Irish and the booze was flowing. At some point I used the men’s room and noticed the groom in a stall (the door was open) with someone who was not the bride. I didn’t know these people (I was my girlfriend’s plus one), and it might have just been some other guy in a suit, so I said nothing.
Some time later, my girlfriend states seriously “We should get going now.” Weird but okay. We grab our stuff and head downstairs. I see the suspicious fellow again in the stairwell going to absolute town on this same lady… My girlfriend grabs my arm tightly and keeps walking past, mumbling a thank you for the invite. I just smile and follow cause it’s all weird.
Long story short: yep, that was the groom… and the woman he was with was his ex-wife… All this went down at his own wedding to another woman (and the bride genuinely seemed like a great girl). The look that woman gave us as we passed was this smugly dominant “I always get what I want, heck yeah.” My girlfriend explained the whole sordid story to me in the cab on the way home.
I never got a follow up to that story, but 10/10 on the music and the drinks. Would tag along to an Irish wedding again!
36. Welcome to the Doghouse
My friend is all hippy-dippy into nature and is fully in love with his dog (like, they go everywhere together). So obviously, when he got married, the ceremony was outside a) for the nature but also b) so the dog could be with him. There were some rows of chairs with lots of people filling them including groom’s mother, who was sitting with his dog.
Bride and groom were at the front with the officiant. Officiant begins. Officiant comes to the part where he says, “Do you take …” Groom’s dog, Shadow, began to howl a loud, long, mournful howl. Everyone laughed. Officiant started the question again. Loud, long, mournful howl again. Everyone laughed. Groom told Shadow to come to the front.
Shadow ran up, stood directly in between the bride and groom and the officiant started again. Not a peep from Shadow. Her vows. His vows. Officiant looked at Shadow and asked, “Shadow do you take bride and groom to be your lawfully wedded parents?” Shadow barked one single bark. Officiant concluded the ceremony, everyone cheered and clapped, and Shadow barked three times, the only times that he made any sounds. Not kidding. Beautiful dog too.
37. A Gang of Back-up Plans
A wedding I was at, one guy got up and pledged his undying love for the bride, followed by four or five others objecting for various reasons including one guy’s love for the groom. By the second or third objection, though, it was clear that the whole thing was a clever ruse. I found out later that it was all set up by the bride as a prank on the unsuspecting groom and family and friends. It was pretty hilarious!
38. It’s My Turn to Use the Husband
My boyfriend was friends with a guy who was getting a quickie marriage and needed witnesses. We agreed and went inside the little reception room, where the preacher, bride, and groom were lined up, waiting for us. The preacher started his thing and I noticed a woman come in and lean against the back wall. She looked mad, standing with her arms crossed.
Preacher: Is there anyone here today who objects to the union of **** and ****? Please, speak now.
The couple looked back at us and we both smiled. Suddenly, the bride’s attention turned to the woman in the back of the room.
Bride: What the freak is she doing here?!
The woman quickly raises her hand, looking at the old preacher.
Woman: I object! I don’t agree with this marriage!
The bride glares at her.
Bride: Shut up! Wait your freaking turn! It’s my scheduled day! You’re just mad you didn’t think of it first!
The woman had to be dragged out of the room, kicking and screaming and spitting at the bride…
After the reception, my friend explained that the groom was originally in a relationship with the bride. After 10 years together, he started sleeping with her sister, the woman at the back of the room. They were close sisters, until both ladies got pregnant by him, simultaneously.They fought each other like cats and dogs for the next several years.
Then, the two young cousins became school-aged and absolute best friends. Neither one of the sisters would give up the man, and he wasn’t sure which one he loved more, so he kept seeing both women. Last I heard they were all still together, but the two sisters had now teamed up to take down his pregnant mistress…
39. He’s Just Playing the Long-Con
The groom’s ex got up and screamed that he was her soulmate, that she forgave him for “this whole thing” and that they should leave now because he’d proven his point. By breaking up with her five years earlier, falling in love, and holding a wedding. I ate so much cake and got so drunk at that wedding. Meanwhile everyone else was screaming and throwing stuff. Good times.
40. No Double Dipping!
I once went to a wedding where the bride got back at her cheating groom in the most ingenious way possible. In the final moments of a Jewish wedding, after the marriage was finalized and all official, the bride straight up runs to the crowd and says, “I’m divorcing my husband for sleeping with my sister!”
I’m not Jewish but apparently, once you’re married in that faith, the bride or groom cannot marry or remarry someone related to the previous wife or something like that. So, this bride not only publicly humiliated her cheating groom and her sister by outing them. She also sealed the fact that they can never ever be together. Mic dropped.
41. The Family That Stays Together Objects Together
A friend of mine was getting married to a guy she had previously dated but broke off the relationship because one night he was drunk and tried to strangle her. They were apart for a couple of years (he supposedly cleaned up), and then started dating again. This guy was bad news. He would talk smack about her all the time, make her cry and stuff, but she kept dating him.
The worst I ever saw him treat her was after I’d already received their wedding invitation in the mail. I was out with my girlfriend when we see Mr. Toxic sitting at the bar, kissing some random woman. I whip out the phone and start filming. I go over to my friends’ house. Mr. Toxic’s car isn’t there so I show her the video.
She breaks down and says she says she doesn’t want to marry him, but feels obligated because all the reservations are already made. I’m like, okay she’s never going to end it so I go see her dad (we’re good friends). He’s a hulking 6’4″ 300lb. Harley rider with a handlebar mustache. When I show him the video, veins start showing up on his forehead.
Before I left, he asked if I could send him the video. I’m like, “Of course.” The next day he calls me up and tells me that the wedding is going to now be a “Dodging A Bullet ceremony with maybe a butt-kicking for the finale.” I told him that I would be more than happy to attend. Apparently, dad told my friend he’d never let her marry Mr. Toxic and they hatched an amazing revenge plan.
The day of the ceremony, Dad had a huge flat screen TV plugged in at the venue. When dad and daughter got to the end of the aisle, the flat screen with surround sound came on and the video played. Mr. Toxic was pasty white, sweating profusely. He did the perp walk down the center aisle, caught my eye with me giving him the finger too.
When he leaves, Dad says, “Let’s Party!” It was amazing. We had a great night. My friend danced her butt off and laughed a lot overall. About six months later, she met the man of her dreams. Just a really fantastic guy. The wedding is this September.
42. A Double-Decker of Trouble
I was at my good friend’s wedding. She’s a sweet girl and she’d fallen hard for a truck driver. Their relationship was long distance forever, so she was thrilled that they were finally getting married. When the priest says, “Does anyone object to this?” a woman stands up and says, “I do.” Turns out the guy wasn’t a truck driver but a married man from Florida who had two kids. He just said he was a driver so he could play her long-distance. Oh and obviously the objecting woman was his real wife. Awkward…
I work wedding bars often in between library shifts, and I saw a wedding where the bride never turned up to the altar and texted the guy 15 minutes before saying, “Sorry but I’m not coming.” It was super depressing, they went ahead with the ‘party’ and the groom ended up leaving at around half 7, the rest of the guests at 10.
What had happened was the bride had spent all day with her parents the day before and they apparently hated her husband to be and had convinced her not to show up. Last thing I heard was she came to his door the next morning and apologized, they’re still together as far as I know… Man was that an awkward work night.
44. Change of Heart
Amazingly, I saw the groom himself object. He just stood up there and started crying, then announced in front of everyone that he had fallen out of love with the bride a while before but didn’t know how to break it off. It was extremely uncomfortable, and they both stepped out. Ten minutes later, they came back in and got married—because she’d apparently told him she was pregnant.
They’re still together, with three kids now. I’m not sure about the husband, but I can confirm that the wife is having an affair. Neither of them are happy, but she has a comfortable life and he doesn’t have the spine to leave.