“Borrow trouble for yourself, if that’s your nature, but don’t lend it to your neighbor.” - Rudyard Kipling
Most of us have always been told we should be good to our neighbor, but not everyone returns the favor. Sure, some troublesome neighbors only cause minor inconveniences; a noisy Sunday here, a poorly parked car there. Easy to ignore. Then some, on the other hand, seem to have been sent straight from hell itself for the sole purpose of tormenting us for the duration of our time on Earth. Or, you know, at least until the lease is up. These Redditors know the feeling all too well, and have shared some of the most maddening stories of their neighbors from hell.
43. Steak Snatchers and Cat Burlars
There was this girl that lived next door to me. Let's call her "Boo" because that's what she liked to be called. I invited her over to my house for drinks once, and she stole my steaks from the freezer. That was when I lived in the ghetto.
When I lived in a more affluent area, crazy still was nearby. Another neighbor stole my cat. The cat went missing for a few days, then showed up back at my doorstep. I took her back in. A few days later, there were "Lost Cat" posters on the doors, with a picture of my cat! The neighbor came by while I was still figuring out what to tell her about the cat, and when I opened the door the cat was standing there between my legs. She was really flustered. When I told her that it was my cat and always had been, she said "well, I already paid to have her shots." I can't even fathom what she was thinking. This cat is a beautiful bengal that likes to hang around on the steps outside of my apartment, obviously not a stray.
42. Safety First!
Many stories but I will leave this bit of speech my genius neighbor spouted last weekend.
Screaming this from her front porch to her adult son who just jumped in his jeep...
"Put your seatbelt on, you been drinkin'!"
41. Little Devils
I guess not "from hell," but still. The neighbor’s kids, man. It starts every spring. They only have one speech volume, which is scream. It sounds like children are being murdered on a daily basis. They jump all over my porch swing even though I have repeatedly asked the parents to tell them not to. They run up and down the stairs of my porch constantly. I am just waiting for one to get seriously hurt and then it's my fault. I have a narrow driveway and last summer the one got his bike wedged between my house and my cars' passenger door, scratched the hell out of it. Basically they just run wild and the parents either don't care, or are too drunk to notice at times. I don't know when I turned into a crotchety old man at 30 but damn those kids.
40. Overreact Much?
Mostly noise violations for nothing. I was cooking steak and bacon on the porch in the summer and they called the fire department once for the smoke.
39. Can’t Catch a Break
Once my neighbor called the police because I was reading a book in a chair. Another time she called because I flushed the toilet three times in a row while I was cleaning it, and she called the police when I was moving out!
38. Timewaster Extraordinaire
My mother's neighbor would call the police almost daily, for anything. Eventually the cops told her to stop calling, and they would ticket her if she made more of these unreasonable complaints. So she started calling the fire department every time they would BBQ.
37. D.I.Why?
I've had neighbors with crappy DIY backyard fires.
They burned things in some kind of old bucket that produced smoke which smelled so toxic. The dad worked at fertilizer company or something. The air in the evening would be all soupy and thick with some kind of burnt off chemical residue or whatever that was in the bucket they lit. That's how to not do fires in a yard.
36. Extreme Measures
When I was a baby the old lady who lived above us put a hose through the window into my cot.
35. Enough Said
Ten chihuahuas.
34. Good Fences Don’t Always Make Good Neighbors
Looked out of my window to see my neighbor leaning over my six-foot-high fence, and stretching right into my yard to saw some of the main branches off my tree... My tree had never extended over the fence and her limb-hacking killed it. A few months later, she cut one of the wires attached to our boundary fence that was holding up a shade cloth in my backyard. I called the cops on her. And a couple of weeks later, all the plants along our boundary fence mysteriously died, and seriously damaged some of my trees... And I still have no idea what her problem is!
33. Paranoia Alert
My neighbor thinks we're trying to steal a few feet of our yard (i.e. "her yard") every time we try to plant trees. She thinks that our shed (which was there before we even moved in) is on her property.
32. Little Old Lady, Big Old Problems
The little old lady across the street from me growing up was awful... here's a few.
Her evil dog bit people but because her son was a cop it was never put down. Also she chained it to the street side of the yard. So it could go from her door to six feet into the yards across the street. She would walk down the street in just panties yelling at the mail man to ring her doorbell no matter what was being delivered. She sat naked at the window and enjoyed traumatizing the poor man. She "befriended" my people-pleasing mother who felt bad for her. And then she would come over when my parents weren't there and the older kids were in charge. She would then steal and threaten to whoop us. When her dog finally died her son arrested my older brothers. Why? Because she swore she saw them dump rat poison in its dish. A full doggy autopsy revealed the dog died because it was 15 and had doggy cancer.
And the kicker, when my baby sister was about five she told her, in front of me and my siblings, that she should die because the night she was born was the night her husband died. She then referred to her as soul stealer for several years.
31. Where Eagles Dare
We live near a protected area for endangered animals. One of the animals that the sanctuary is meant to protect is bald eagles. Since we live next to a field, it's pretty common for an eagle to sit on our porch and disembowel its rabbit for dinner. We have a neighbor that keeps calling the cops on us because the bird is on our property and claims it is traumatizing his innocent children. He treats us like we're the ones murdering fluffy bunnies for our own amusement.
30. Tree Trouble
Our neighbor has a really yappy dog named Jimmy that drives us nuts. When the neighbor asked us to cut down a little tree in our yard that was casting a shadow on her garden, my husband resolved that we would cut it down only when Jimmy shuts up. That is, never.
A couple weeks later, we found the tree cut down. The maniac must have snuck into the yard at night and cut it down. I can't stand that lady.
29. Human Trash
Found a neighbor of mine putting his trash in my cans. Then when I confronted him he tried to fight me.
28. Crazy Cable Cutter
My neighbor cut the cable with her garden shears, I presume an argument over the bill.
She wouldn't let the cable company in to repair it. So they had to bypass her house, my house and about six others had no TV, phone or internet for eight days.
27. Plant Problems
We used to live in a property with two units and we were in the back. Lived there for four or five years before the new front unit neighbors (a couple in their 60s-70s) moved in. A few weeks in, she complained about our front yard bit which was not a shared area and it consisted of a tree and three or four small bushes. She wanted us to plant something nicer in OUR private area (2m x 1m) keeping in mind we were in the back so no one from the street could see it anyways. My mum told her she didn't have the time to do that so she suggested we hire her gardener to take care of our area and mum told her we didn't have that kind of money to spend.
Next thing you know she sends us her grandson (he would've been late 20s) to try and convince us to change our plants to what she wanted. She hinted we should do it because he was a professional private detective and he was really good at his job. Crazy plant lady.
26. Unforgivable
When I was a kid, we let my neighbor borrow our Donkey Kong 3 game and Legend of Zelda: A Link to the Past and he never returned them.
25. The Snail Savior
I have actually been a terrible neighbor, it's something I actually still feel a little bad about (sort of). Basically where we lived we would get a lot of snails when it rained, I mean buckets full of them, it was a ritual of my mothers to go out and collect them all and "dispose" of them "humanely" with a brick.
Being a six-year-old I absolutely loved snails and would feel really bad for the little guys and would go out and grab as many as I could in order to "save" them, of course it made sense for me to simply throw them over the fence into my neighbor's yard where they could go live happily. It was only much later that I overheard a conversation between my neighbor and my mother in which she was saying all her roses had been almost destroyed by snails, the even worse part was apparently they belonged to her husband (the roses) who had passed away so they held a lot of sentimental value.
After that the snails got "released" to the house behind us who my mum didn't like so everyone was none the wiser.
Sorry lady neighbor I hope your roses grew back okay.
24. Real Top Notch Parenting
In our last apartment, we lived on the second floor. A family on the fourth floor had this kid who was maybe three years old. Every morning between six and eight they'd walk up the staircase after having been out, and most of the time the kid would start crying. Loudly. What was the solution of the parents? Leave the crying kid in the staircase on its own for 15 minutes! Our apartment doors carried sound through them very well, so it was basically like having a screaming three-year-old in your hallway every morning.
Let's just say it got on my nerves rather quickly. So what did I do? Nothing of course, I'm a Swede.
23. Dreaming of Luftballons
Lived in an apartment over a couple who would constantly fight and blast '80s German electro pop during week nights when I had to get up for work at 5am.
22. A Flood of Emotions
The neighbor upstairs keeps overflowing their washing machine which causes flooding in our house. Now I have anxiety whenever I hear water running. Thanks for that.
21. Treated Like Dirt
This was around ten years ago. We received a phone call from the police station, saying that our neighbor had filled a complaint. The complaint was that there was a very large pile of dirt and debris on our lawn in the backyard, and it was obstructing our neighbors view out their kitchen window.
Now here's the best part. My family hadn't even moved in yet. We were in the middle of having the house built. It was a new subdivision.
Worst part is—we had a week to have it removed, otherwise we'd be fined. There is actually a bi-law against piles of dirt on your lawn.
20. Way to go, Dad
When I was about eight, my father had rented a backhoe, and in a meth-fueled rage, used it to tear off the bed of my mom's Frontier before driving over to the neighbor's house and threatening them with it.
They obviously got a restraining order against us.
19. Ransacked
I lived down the street from a heroin dealer. My house was constantly being robbed by his customers. I forgot to lock my car and they stole my GPS, and all my loose change. I didn't lock my shed and they took my lawnmower and gas. I assume they filled their car up, but on the bright side, they returned the can to my shed after using it. If it wasn't locked up, they would steal it, which is why I don't have a bike anymore.
SUPERSTORM Sandy flooded my house with two feet of water. My front door wouldn't close because it had swelled from being immersed in water. My neighbors cleaned my house out. They took everything I own. They even went through my attic. They ripped my pipes out of the wall. They stole my oven, my sink, my furnace, my water heater, my refrigerator, my pavers, my car, my boat, my sports autograph collection with signatures from Willie Mays and Micky Mantle, my guns, but as expected they never even touched my book collection. Back to what they took: my guitars, my video games, my TV, my sleeping bag, my computer, and my coin collection.
18. Night Terrier
The neighbors had a fox terrier that barked constantly every night at 1am for at least an hour (sometimes as long as three hours). They never stopped her from doing this. We were so thankful when they moved.
17. Cookie Monsters
Every year at Christmas the neighbors on my street exchange homemade cookies. We just leave them on each other's doorstep, it's very nice. Our neighbor on the right always takes store bought and puts them in boxes like she made them herself. Everybody knows, though.
16. Family Feud
My parents' next door neighbor (who is also my mother's cousin) sued them three or four times over property disputes and once because his adult son allegedly fell over a decorative rock to prevent said neighbor from parking on my parents' lawn. The guy's house has been condemned but they still live there.
15. Poppy and Puppy Problems
Years ago a crazy neighbor dumped pesticide on the Remembrance Poppies my parents were trying to grow in their front garden. No idea why—I think he was off his meds. Still nothing will grow in that spot.
My parent's current neighbors have a small dog they keep locked up under their house all day and never walk (my parents have even offered to walk it but they won't let them). It barks all day and drives my parents crazy but they still feel sorry for it. They also leave it there when they go away and my parents aren't sure if they have someone feeding it or just leave a bunch of food. Recently they got two NEW puppies which they keep upstairs with them and take with them on holidays but the old dog still gets locked up downstairs. My parents are on the verge of calling the RSPCA on them because it seems incredibly cruel—psychologically if not physically—to keep an animal locked up like that with barely any interaction.
14. The Not-So-Great Escapes
Never had much luck with neighbors, but by god the last one was horrible. They had two massive dogs that were completely untrained, never left the house and were outside day and night 24/7. Constantly barking their asses off setting my dog off as well.
One time one of their dogs escaped by jumping the fence off their patio furniture. We had to call animal control because he was sitting at the end of the driveway charging at people who walked down the street for god knows how long. The second time one of them escaped they took off and the drunk owner screamed at my dad for at least an hour accusing him of stealing their dog. Big surprise when one of them never escaped again after moving their patio furniture away from the fence.
They left a couple months ago and my dad was so excited he took a chair and sat in front of our window watching them load their U-haul truck.
13. Get Off My Lawn
When I was little our neighbor put barbed wire underneath the gap in our fence so we couldn't reach under and grab our ball if it rolled underneath.
12. Guardian of the Mailbox
Woke up at 2am to somebody screaming obscenities and firing a shotgun in my front yard. Carefully looked out to see my neighbor in his underwear running towards my mailbox and "chasing off" some people parked by my mailbox. The neighbor lived right next door, and apparently his mailbox had been damaged recently. My mailbox is about 160 feet from the house. We live on a dead end street, and I think the car had stopped so somebody could take a leak....
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11. When Nature Calls
I live in a nice neighborhood with my wife and baby. I've got new neighbors who are renting the house beside me. Yesterday, while outside in the evening, my new neighbor peed in my flower bed. Peed on a rose bush my grandad gave me (he owns a small town nursery). So now, I'm planning revenge and hoping for passive aggressive suggestions.
10. Off The Meds
Well, two days ago she let the air out of my tires. She thinks I'm using mind control and "no-touch torture" on her family. Believes I'm in a cult, constantly says I'm the most pathetic thing on the face of the Earth... On Christmas a few years back she left a brown paper bag with three baby potatoes and a note that said redruM on it. I've got enough stories to fill a book.
Mental illness isn't a joke, guys. There is nothing the police can do until she actually does something to me.
9. Well I’ll Be Dam’d
I work in the agricultural industry and sometimes have to help sort out disputes between neighbors. I have always been shocked as to how two grown adults (or two families) will allow the situation to degrade to the point of violence.
One time I was contacted because of a dam usage dispute. Basically, the two warring neighbors were unsure of the boundary between their two properties and both wanted to use this one particular dam. Both had in the past fenced it off, and both had cut the other neighbor's fence down. I identified who the dam belonged to and provided advice accordingly. The neighbor who came off second best wasn't happy... He didn't say anything to me, really. But he did throw a tonne of dynamite in the dam, rendering it useless. It also exploded the animals drinking from it at the time of detonation.
Another person is suspected of taking revenge on his neighbor for some sort of personal slight. I say suspected, because it's been thoroughly investigated and no one knows the clear details. All I can say is that the neighbor disappeared without a trace and rumor has it, was cut into pieces and stuffed down an out of commission bore hole.
On other occasions, I've had to deal with neighbors who have shot at each other, lit each other's infrastructure on fire, stolen each other's property (including livestock) or even in one case, slept with the neighbor's daughter out of revenge. Keeps life interesting.
8. The Noisiest Neighbor
I live in the Italian countryside, and my house has no fence or gate, all open space. But my neighbors do. All of them have a fence with a gate and to have it opened what do they do? HONK THE THING.
They ALL have the remote and key to open the gate but NOPE, let's honk for a solid minute to have the damn thing opened.
I feel like these people have actual servants and make them open the gate just 'cause.
Also, another of these neighbors has screaming-beyond-reason kids and 24/7 yapping dogs. And said kids seem to own the most squeaky swing in the entire universe. I feel like their father oils it with salted water.
7. A Lesson Not Learned
Their chihuahua constantly got out of their fence. I would catch it and return it to their yard because it would wander into traffic. Owner didn't seem to care much. After a few years of this, I was taking my daughters on a walk and the dog darted out in front of a car and was killed. My daughters witnessed this and were pretty shaken up.
He got a new chihuahua the NEXT DAY! It shouldn't be like a broken toaster oven you just replace.
He never fixed the fence and now the replacement dog runs out in traffic, too.
6. Honking Mad
Tiny houses all separated by only a thin driveway. Every day, 3am, neighbor gets picked up for work (nurse, I think) by a car that HONKS the horn. Just one honk, but totally unnecessary and right next to my bedroom. I go and ask them to ask this person to call or knock on their door instead and they start complaining about my tree hanging over the driveway.
Result: they cut half the branches off my tree (legal, hanging over their property) and the honking continued. I moved.
5. He DID Start The Fire
In my first apartment, the tenant upstairs pushed his mattress against the heater (it was a wall electric unit with a turn knob) turned it on and left. Almost burnt the whole building down. We found out afterwards there was a warrant out for his arrest.
4. Just Plain Cursed
Neighbor’s kid used to always just walk right in the front door. Before I moved into the house the original owner murdered the previous neighbor for always parking in his driveway. House is cursed to make annoying neighbors I guess.
3. Way Over The line
A few years ago a neighbor two doors down decided to replace a fence. However they felt their back yard wasn't big enough. So they took down their existing fence. They also cut down three medium sized trees that were on the other side of their fence, as in not on their property. Then they built the fence five feet onto the neighbor's property. They even bolted it to the neighbor's house. She was a single mom and a brain and breast cancer survivor who doesn't have a lot of money for litigation. I am assuming they just thought there was nothing she could do about it. When we moved though she did have a lawyer who was helping her. I don't know if the fence has been moved yet.
2. Heartless Cruelty
When I was 11 my father drove into my deaf sleeping cat. The cat with half its skull crushed in ran into the house then over and under my neighbor's car where he hid. I was distraught and in tears. My father went to pick my mother up from work so they could catch the cat. My neighbor comes over to me who is sitting on the front steps crying his eyes out. First he asks "Is that your cat under my car?" then "when are you going to clean the blood off my driveway and car?" What kind of sicko asks that of a child who has just lost his pet?
1. Blown Away
Cop here. I went to a disturbance call where two neighbors were blowing leaves at each other with leaf blowers. They were actually mad while doing this.
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