While some of us will throw temper tantrums without thinking twice about it, others among us will hold back and keep our cool no matter what goes wrong. Or so we think! It turns out that even some of the calmest people out there have their breaking point. Every now and then, someone does something so rude, mean, or just plain stupid that the only response possible is a full-blown meltdown. Here are 42 stories about what pushed some ordinarily very calm individuals over the edge.
42. Laying Down the Law
My brother and I played travel sports for a few seasons as kids. One trip, I was at the pool with some of his teammates messing around in the water and the coach’s kid was being a jerk as usual. My brother was one of the smaller kids on his team so the coach’s son would mess with him a lot. Most of the kids on my brother’s team disliked him but didn’t speak up so they wouldn’t be next. He thought it would be funny to pick up my brother’s drink right in front of him and spit into it.
My dad taught me from a young age not to let anyone mess with my brother or sister, so I got seriously pissed. I took a good running start and shoulder checked him into the pool. Since he had just gotten there, he hadn’t taken his clothes off yet, and cried because his phone and iPod got ruined. He literally ran out yelling, “I’m telling my dad!”
Well that backfired, because everyone stuck up for my brother and the coach was not happy to find out what a colossal jerk his son was being, so he was the only one to end up getting in any trouble.
41. Animal Crackers
This lady came to the shelter to see the cats. She asked if she could give them treats and I said yes. It’s a shelter where most of the cats are free. So she gets the bag out, the cats are getting wild with anticipation and… she just stands there laughing and tempting them without giving them anything. She looked like she enjoyed their anxiety and her laugh sounded like a crazy person.
I lost it, grabbed the bag out of her hands, gave the treats to the cats and asked her to leave. Those cats are already stressed out, don’t give them more anxiety.
40. The Company Owns Your Soul
My grandfather passed away so I told my boss that I had to take a couple of days off to be with my family. He had the nerve to tell me that work was more important than family and threatened to fire me. I went off on him in the middle of the office for a solid 5 minutes before quitting and rushing home.
39. Maybe It Should Have Been Watermelon Sized
I lost my mind when my patient got her pre-authorization for surgery for a large grapefruit sized pelvic mass denied by BCBS, and when I did a peer-to-peer, the doctor working for the insurance company said I needed to have a psychiatrist rule out mental causes of her pain first. I had to walk away for 30 minutes before seeing another patient because had anyone given me any more lip I might have gotten violent.
38. Don’t Blame the Victim!
I lost my temper when I was late for work because my colleague asked me to cover their shift and gave me the wrong time. It was my fault from the company’s perspective.
37. Baby You’re A Firework
It was Halloween and I was sitting out in front of my house watching my sister take my niece, who was around 4, trick or treating. The people who lived above us (we lived in a maisonette) decided to shoot a firework at them. This is the only time I’ve ever thrown a temper tantrum. Got them inside the house and made sure they were alright. Sister had only a few non-serious burns on her arm and managed to shield my niece from the explosion.
I was just so angry that I went up to their door and starting banging on it, demanding they come out. They didn’t answer so I start trying to kick the door in. My mum and brother dragged me away and back inside to calm me down. Half an hour later, the police arrived because the neighbors had called them about me. Luckily after we explained what had actually happened I didn’t get in any trouble.
36. Could You Repeat That, Please?
My friend is bad with math. I was explaining a thing to him once, it took 10 minutes, he tells me he doesn’t get it, so I sit there and explain this thing more deeply to him. It took 30 minutes. This is the scene that then ensued: takes in-ear headphones out of ear (he was covering them with his hand), and says “Oh sorry, I wasn’t listening to you, I found this amazing radio show recently and was just listening to it.”
I blew my top.
35. Now That’s How You Shut up a Restaurant
I worked at a diner with an open kitchen (you can see us and we can see you). I’m the only cook during the lunch rush when I hear a lady shout “hey!”; I look over and a lady sitting in a booth points at me and then does a very condescending “come here” motion with her finger. I thought something was wrong with her food, so I decide I can run out of the kitchen for a moment (leaving 4 orders on the grill) and see what I need to fix.
She has no food on her table. She holds her blue soda cup out to me and asks “what is this?” “Uhhh excuse me?” “Why is my root beer in a soda cup and not a mug?” “I… I don’t know anything about that, I’m just the coo-” “oh great, another freaking idiot in this freaking stupid place who doesn’t know anything!” She then proceeds to chew me out because I, the cook, do not know why the server gave her root beer in a cup. (We have special root beer mugs but as it turns out the servers couldn’t find them, someone misplaced them).
I apologize to her and head back into the kitchen while she’s loudly talking about me to the next booth. What do I find upon my return? Naturally, I find that all of my orders are ruined (and more had been coming in in the meantime). It’s already stressful working in a kitchen, and that was the last straw. I went back in and started screaming about her and kicking the heck out of the walk-in cooler.
When I went back out everyone was quiet and avoided eye contact, even the lady with the issues (still looked pretty mad though). I rushed through the orders and thank God she left without saying anything. I didn’t get in trouble though since my manager was serving and had to deal with her as well. He understood.
34. Toughness Gets Results Sometimes
So earlier this year, my health insurance got messed up. I started making too much money to qualify for my state’s medicare, so healthcare.gov requested a notification from New Jersey Family Care to confirm that I wasn’t on it anymore. So in January, I called them to get said notification. They say “yeah, you should get it in a couple of weeks.” It never comes.
Unfortunately, I had forgotten about it until healthcare.gov sends me a message saying that they’re going to raise my insurance costs if I don’t get them the notification in the next 2 weeks. So I call family care again and explain the situation to them. They once again claim they’re going to send me the notice and don’t. So now, after getting an extension from healthcare.gov about this, I call up family care once more and attempt to explain the situation, politely requesting the cancellation notice.
But for no apparent reason, the woman on the phone decides to start giving me an attitude, saying some stupid nonsense like “UMMM, you know this is the cancellation department right?” and I completely lost my mind.
“What the HECK is your PROBLEM?! I don’t understand why the heck you can’t just send me this DARN LETTER. What’s happening over there? Just look in the freaking file and CANCEL IT. Yes, you IDIOT, I know this is the cancellation department, I WANT A NOTICE THAT IT’S CANCELLED.”
I must have scared the daylights out of her because the next thing she said was “… uh I’ll go get my supervisor” who solved the problem in 10 minutes and I got my cancellation notice 3 days later.
33. Safety Instructions Are There for a Reason, People
I was in charge of a rollover trainer once at a military training site. Think of a Humvee on an axle that spins, like a rollover accident. Part of the safety briefing procedure before anyone goes in is being told to empty your pockets of all items. Take any items on belts off. We have rubber items inside to simulate bad flying. We do this for safety’s sake.
Part of the training is we stop the trainer on its side/roof, so the participants can get exposure to assisting the other passengers and helping them exit the vehicle safely and quickly.
It’s been a really long and boring day. It’s hot and, like during all good army training, I am hungover and irritated. All the participants there are officers, and they aren’t listening even slightly. We stopped the exercise on the roof for a group, and they all exit except one who can’t undo the seatbelt.
I open the door and reach in. I placed my hand right on a dual-edge, 4-inch boot knife. I absolutely flipped my lid. I saw red, my ears burned, and I distinctly remember seeing one of the other instructors mouth “Oh darn!”
I chewed out every single officer there, ALL of whom outranked me, many of whom even outranked my commander. Didn’t matter, as my position was Safety Officer. I went on a full tirade.
I turn around after it was done, and my best friend is recording the whole thing on his phone. The guy showed everyone that clip for the rest of the week and for years after that. I’m retired now, and I miss that buddy every day!
32. Many of Us Would Have Done the Same in Her Shoes
My friend who is usually a chill person had some girl make fun of her brother who had gotten killed, and she ended up promptly beating the daylights out of her, smashing her face into the wall, and getting kicked out of our school for it.
31. Hit Me Once, Shame on You. Hit Me Three Times, Shame on Me…
This happened to me in some club ages ago. I was bouncing around on the dance floor with everybody else and apparently I stepped on some dude’s foot who had been standing there with his posse of 2 or 3 other guys watching people.
I shrugged and apologized, then turned around to leave. Right then “somebody” smacked me in the back of the head. Not hard, but too hard to ignore. I turned around, still calm, and said something like, “Look, I’m gonna walk this way, you guys stay here and nothing more needs to happen.”
Turned around again, got smacked in the head again. I was very much pissed off at that point. It didn’t help that they tried to look at me all innocent. I couldn’t even tell which one of them did it. So I just stuck my finger in the face of the dude whose foot I allegedly stepped on and recommended that he doesn’t do it again. Turned around once more, waiting to get smacked in the head again.
This time they poured a glass of beer on my back. That’s when I completely lost my cool. I threw myself around and went straight at the guy. I was in full rage mode, didn’t care what happened next as long as that guy suffered. I could tell by the terrified look on his face that he realized he had gone too far. His friends never stepped in to help him. After a while people separated us and that was that.
I have no sympathy at all for people who resort to violence for solving their problems, but I feel no shame for having snapped in that situation. I think I did everything in my power to avoid what eventually happened.
30. His Word Against Mine
I traded shifts with a guy and worked his shift before he was to work mine. The new schedule reflected this. He was a no call no show. Said he forgot we traded shifts even though the day before he didn’t show up for his original shift. Whatever. The next time I come in for a shift they’re trying to write ME up for a no call no show, even though the shift change was approved and it was no longer my shift. ‘
Apparently my coworker lied and said I wanted both shifts and they were going to take his word over what the system said and over the company policy. I was livid. I made a huge stink to HR about it and threatened to get a lawyer involved (I never intended to do that, I don’t have that kind of money) but they couldn’t call my bluff. The moment I said the L word everyone’s attitude changed and my coworker got the write up. His second strike.
Two weeks later he got caught sleeping in the back room while on the clock and they finally fired his useless butt. I quit about 6 months later.
29. Music to My Ears
I had things all set up to play piano with a string quartet for a wedding ceremony in a church.
The grand piano was up front, near the couple, and the organ in the rear to be used later.
When I entered the church, I found that the florist had placed a large vase of roses on the grand piano, using the sheet music for the string quartet underneath the vase to absorb water.
Rarely do I lose my cool, but I did that time. Members of the string quartet told him in no uncertain terms where he could stick those roses as they tried to salvage their soaked music scores.
28. His Head Is Always in His Books
In sixth grade, a group of some four kids took a monopoly over the back of the bus, a true power move. I always minded my own business and tried to sit away from them. For one, they all didn’t understand basic hygiene and smelled even though they were older than me. Anyway, turns out the bus driver was their quiet, retired Grandpa, who would never tell them to stop bullying or doing dumb things.
So one time they have a freaking spitting war, as in they spit across the seats at each other as they jump seats for cover. At one point, I was in the middle seat and a giant wad of their disgusting spit hit me square in my face.
I then proceeded to take my Pearson history book, one of those big, heavy hardcover textbooks, and smash one of them over the head with it. Granted, this was after me telling them to stop their nonsense several times.
The spitting stopped after that.
The book cover cracked and I had to pay for that at the end of the year, but I regret nothing.
27. Department of Morons With Vehicles?
It was my 7th trip to the DMV when trying to reinstate my license. Every single time, they scrutinized my paperwork and always managed to find something “wrong” and would send me away to fix it.
On this 7th trip, they finally resorted to, “You have no proof that you ever had a license,” despite my piles of paperwork showing my driving record, among other things.
I refused to leave the seat and said, “You people are freaking monsters.”
A manager was called. We argued, he said he believed that I had had a license, but that there was just no proof, and he couldn’t risk accepting my paperwork in case someone checked it.
I said I refused to leave the seat until I knew exactly what was needed. Finally, the manager said he could contact my previous state of residence and could get a verification that I had indeed had a license there. It would take 3 minutes.
That’s when I yelled, in the middle of the DMV, “WHY WASN’T THAT THE FIRST FREAKING THING YOU SAID??!!”
Anyway, I got my license back.
26. Taking Semantics to the Extreme
When trying to get my wife’s information switched to our new state, they said they needed a birth certificate. Apparently they needed the original and not the copy the hospital gave her mother. The troll of a clerk looked her in the eye and said with a straight face, “This isn’t a birth certificate, it’s just a certificate that says you were born.”
I responded by having a meltdown.
25. Don’t Have a Cow, Man!
I grew up on a farm and one day, several cows decided that since their heads could fit through a small hole in a gate, then their whole body must be able to fit through a small hole in a gate. This resulted in a broken gate, a cow stuck in the broken gate, several cows roaming freely in a field after escaping through the broken gate, and me absolutely losing my mind.
I now work in IT. Cows are dumb.
24. Double Standard
My wife was due to give birth on a date I had a trial scheduled (I’m an attorney). The State’s Attorney’s Office refused to consent to a continuance, insisting they were going to be ready for trial that day.
The date comes, I go to the courthouse and find out that the SAO doesn’t have one of their witnesses and is asking for a continuance.
Needless to say, I lost my patience arguing against them receiving such a continuance when they had failed to subpoena a witness (or make any effort to contact said witness, by their own admission). The judge, of course, allowed them to have a continuance. I swore I’d never practice in that court again (it’s one known around here for being especially friendly to the prosecution, to the point of absurdity, and where the SAO is known to engage in constitutionally questionable evidentiary practices).
My wife gave birth the next day, and I’ve never been back to that jurisdiction. The State ultimately dropped the charges against my client because they didn’t have a critical witness.
23. Street Cred
This guy at work was “cleaning” out the work break room. Basically, he was throwing out people’s personal belongings. So, I see my new coffee mug I bought specifically for work in the trash and lost my darn mind. I started yelling at him that what he was doing was morally wrong and that it’s not his stuff to throw out. I went to my HR manager and complained to him about the “principle” of the thing. I took all of the coffee mugs in the trash out and washed them.
The good thing is, if you are a calm person 99% of the time, people are more likely to listen to you in the 1% of moments you lose it.
22. Let It Go
I can remember that day like it was yesterday…
I was home packing my stuff to get ready for when my husband was getting out of basic training.
I NEVER yell or even raise my voice to anyone ever.
My dad has always had a wicked temper, and my sister has a knack for starting yelling matches with him.
One night, she forgot to do something she was supposed to, and the yelling started again. I ignored it up until he called her stupid. It got under my skin so I spoke up a little, saying that he shouldn’t call her that. He hollered back, “You are MY daughters, I can talk to you however I want!” That’s when I snapped.
I saw red for the first time in my life, and I completely lost it. I screamed back at him at how I was tired of him treating us like garbage when he lost his temper, at how we hid in the back room with my mom until he cooled off, and how all I wanted was to visit my family before I had to move over 12 hours away from them. I also threatened that if he EVER wanted to see me again, then he needed to shut up and sit in the corner until he was done throwing a fit.
I yelled at him for the first time in my life for a solid 30 minutes. I didn’t stop until everything that had built up over the years was let out, and I saw him go from red-faced angry to what seemed to be guilt-ridden.
When I finally stopped, he was quiet. He didn’t say a word and walked away.
Shortly after I moved out, he went to a doctor and has been put on some medication to help with his anger issues.
Now he’s super friendly to all of us, and I haven’t heard him throw a tantrum like he used to in over 10 years now. He has never spoken poorly to me or my sister since then either.
21. Someone Had to Get It
Another unit lied to me about the condition a patient was in. I went into the supply room and SCREAMED to vent at another nurse. Poor girl remains the only person at work to ever see me lose my head like that.
20. Steady Hands
As a surgeon, I try to remain calm and steady about most everything. Even all the staff comment about how I’m the calmest surgeon they’ve ever met.
One time taking out someone’s gallbladder, the assistant needed to grab it and hold it up so I could free stuff up. Newer person was helping me and moving a little too fast without seeing where their instrument was going before grabbing the gallbladder. They ended up poking a small hole in the liver. I went as crazy as I’ve ever gone in my life: I let out an audible sigh and small grumble.
Ended up not bleeding all that much and rest of surgery went fine.
One of these days I plan to react to something like that by throwing instruments around the room, just to see how people react.
19. Premeditated Revenge
A kid bit me on the chest in kindergarten. I waited till after nap time to run him over with my tricycle.
18. Was She Wearing a Pencil Skirt?
This girl viciously bullied me in school. She told everyone I was a lesbian at a conservative all-girls school where this made you a social pariah, started rumors that my Dad was gay, threw paper at me during class, and other nasty stuff. In history class, she was sitting behind me and started kicking me through the hole in the back of my chair. I told her to stop it several times, but she kept doing it. I turned around and stabbed her in the leg with a pencil (didn’t draw blood, ‘twas but a scratch). I got detention but she left me alone after that.
17. Silence Is Golden
In woodwork/metalwork class around grade 8 or 9, this jerk keeps hitting my work with a steel ruler and generally messing with my stuff. Basically just blasted him at the top of my lungs for a good 5 minutes. Teacher was there. Said absolutely nothing.
16. Water Under the Bridge
My friend and I were walking home from high school, sophomore year I think. He was really bothering me, kept lightly tripping me the whole walk home. I kept asking him to stop but he didn’t. For context, I did get picked on in high school so maybe this moment was just the breaking point for some other incident.
When we got near where we would separate, he did the tripping thing one last time and I lost it. I swung my backpack at him (high school remember, so I had heavy books, lunch bag, etc.). Here’s the part where he really screwed up. He was carrying a balsa wood bridge home that he needed to complete for some class. When I swung the backpack, he dropped the bridge. I ran directly at him but then saw another, better target. I could’ve kicked a 60-yard field goal. I grabbed my bag, turned and walked as he stared at his scattered work, saying in a shocked voice, “You broke my bridge.” I replied “I don’t care” or something to that effect.
15 years later and he’s one of my best friends.
I never liked playing football in general just because I wasn’t an aggressive person. But in 5th grade, I had a teammate who, during practice scrimmages, would always line up across from me. At the snap, he would grab me by my facemask and pull me to the ground. I let it go on for most of the season until I started having neck issues and pains (and still do).
During one of our final practices, I was getting water across the field and decided enough was enough. I sprinted full charge across the field, sacked him with all my weight, and while I pinned him down under me I started grabbing his facemask and repeatedly slammed his head into the dirt until my coaches pulled me off him.
When the season ended I decided to switch to basketball.
14. What’s Wrong With This Guy?
When my ex-wife’s step-brother told us a story about how he killed his neighbor’s cat for fun, and then lied to his neighbor about having not seen it.
13. I Think It’s Time to Go
When they brought the third sales manager in, four hours into my 90-minute timeshare presentation.
12. No Regrets
My Dad was in the hospital after having a stroke, I was 14 at the time and still in school. This absolute little garbage kid kept going on about how my dad was going to die, that he deserved it, etc.
I put up with it all morning, but at lunch he cornered me. Normally I took all the beatings and bullying, but not that day. I lost it. I don’t remember what happened, but apparently it took 3 adults to pull my 14-year-old, 100 lbs self off him.
I regret nothing. He didn’t mess with me after that.
11. Bon Appetit!
When someone’s kid at Golden Corral decided to put their hands in the food containers and they did nothing about it.
10. That’s What Happens When You Get Cheeky
Back in school we had tiny lockers stacked right next to each other. Locker neighbor would always close mine while I was fishing through my backpack. Went on every day for the whole year, he thought it was funny. Last day of school I’d had it, punched him across the cheek. He didn’t do it the next year, and didn’t bother telling any adult because he knew he was in the wrong.
9. Sounds Like a Fiesta
I lost my temper one time when I was little, somewhere in the 5-10 range. That doesn’t sound out of the ordinary, but I was a quiet, reserved kid who didn’t ever do much out of line. Anyway, I have an older brother who tormented me all the time. This day he had been particularly bad, but I still just took it and coped.
My mom made burritos for dinner. I love burritos, but only if they’re well put together. Sloppy sandwiches drive me nuts. Anyway, my brother and I are sitting down, waiting for my parents to sit at the dinner table too. My brother sees that I’m excited and is privy to my sandwich pet peeve, so he takes just his index finger and smashes it down on my burrito as hard as he can. I get upset, so he just open-palm smashes the burrito on my plate into an absolute mess.
I lose it and whip the burrito at him, missing and nailing the wall. Parents walked in just when I threw the burrito on the wall. They freeze, and then instead of yelling at me, they immediately ask my brother, “What did you do to him?” Hearing that I would not be punished and that they knew it was my brother’s fault without seeing what happened made it a little bit better. I don’t think I ever ended up getting a burrito that night, though.
8. Self-Appointed Spiritual Mentor
I’m a bit more quick to anger these days, but as a child I was fairly quiet and such.
When I was in 6th grade, I was always forced to go to church every Sunday and Wednesday. Perks of growing up in the Bible Belt. I’ve always been a pretty heavy reader, and like most kids at that time I was heavily into the Harry Potter series. The people at the church my mother forced me to attend decided that those books were not only of the Devil himself, but also surely corrupting me. They took every opportunity to tell me so.
Making matters worse, the son of my Sunday school teacher decided he was responsible for correcting my devilish ways. In addition to harassing me about these books every chance he got, he also began getting physical about it. I pretty much just let it all go because it was just a bunch of idiots, what did I care? That is, until he spit in my face. Twice. I chased him down and proceeded to beat the daylights out of him. I’ve only been in a few fights, but I’ve never been in one where I was this absolutely livid.
He never bothered me about my choice in books again and I stopped being forced to go to church, so I guess it all worked out ok?
7. Short But Sweet
I’d been dealing with my dad and his ex-girlfriend having screaming matches and occasionally getting dragged into it for like a year. They started again one evening and she addressed me, demanding that I answer something or another to fuel her argument against my dad. I was just trying to play a game at the time and I just kinda snapped and screamed, “I don’t know and I don’t care and I’m tired of your fighting.”
It wasn’t much but I’ve never raised my voice ever, and I think it kinda just stunned them both into silence. She walked out of the house.
6. Was the Dress Blue and Black or White and Gold?
When my boyfriend and I were breaking up over the phone and I asked to come by to get a dress I left at his place. He informed me that he “accidentally threw it out.” This and a combination of him telling me he didn’t want a relationship anymore after telling me two days ago we were fine…I lost it. I saw red and have never yelled so much in my life.
5. The Good Old Lever-Thump
In secondary school, a girl sitting next to me kept emptying my pencil case onto the floor and laughing with her friend about it, so I punched her on the top of the head. Sort of like a lever coming down.
She cried and I got detention but that was fine.
Looking back, she probably fancied me but you mess with me, you get the lever-thump.
I’m 30 now but if you empty my pencil case onto the floor I’ll still take a detention for a good downward thump.
4. Taking a Stand
My baby’s momma said she’s considering not vaccinating our kid. I did not react well…
3. You Can’t Choose Your Family
It has always felt like my parents never wanted me. I was a surprise honeymoon baby born 9 months and a day after their wedding. Throughout my childhood, I was regularly screamed at for anything I did until I just started hiding, I was called “the practice child” my whole life, my younger siblings got way more love and attention, etc.
In my teens they started taking in “strays.” If any neighborhood kids didn’t want to go home, they could just be at our house all the time. Effectively, my mother would take my friends away from me to be HER friends instead. One of these strays that she invited in was a kid who picked on me constantly from the time I was 11 years old. I guess they had that in common.
That guy was kicked out of his dad’s house AND his mom’s house when he was 20, so my parents took him in permanently. That killed me. But I always wanted their approval, so I was always calm and agreeable, always desperately trying to figure out how to get them to love me, so I went along with it.
Years later, I’m married and have a son. This guy still lives with my parents. They continue to coddle and make excuses for him while criticising me for whatever they feel like. One day, we’re all at my parents house and my son is being a goofy 2 year old, which annoys the man-child living there. So he gets furious, picks my son up by his ankle, and spanks him.
My parents claimed not to have seen it. We went home.
I couldn’t sleep that night because I was so upset. The next morning, I made sure the guy and my mom would be at home (although that didn’t take much effort cause why wouldn’t he be there). I went to confront them with my wife. I dumped everything I had been putting up with on them for about an hour, including asking how my mom could allow this jerk to hit my son. She maintained that it didn’t happen, so I went through the roof.
I ended up crying because of all the pent-up emotion, so my fantastic wife took over. She said we wouldn’t ever be coming back if the guy still lived there, so he yelled that he would move out and then stormed off after saying he didn’t have to listen to this. My parents convinced him not to move out shortly after we left.
We went to counseling with them later. For months. It validated everything I had felt, but they never stopped lying and being defensive. One counselor said we should be on Dr. Phil. The other counselor said my mom is “incapable of empathy.” Both counselors called my parents delusional. But they didn’t take any of that seriously.
Haven’t spoken with them in almost a year, and life is so much better.
2. Did He Pass The Test?
Story about my neighbor who was calm to the point where he didn’t even flinch when some idiot pulled a knife on him one time. He was a senpai (assistant sensei/teacher) at a dojang and was in charge of teaching kids aged 8-16. He absolutely loved his role as a big brother to all these kids and taught them about discipline, restraint, and how to think before you act. He basically taught the kids how to think and consider everything before even contemplating an action, whilst also teaching them how to break someone in half with a kick (the contradiction always made me laugh).
Anyway, one of his talented students was a little 11 year old sweetheart called Jules. He was fantastic and determined. He was also a bit shy, so my neighbor loved bonding with him and getting him to open up. Unfortunately for Jules however, his parents were bullies and bad people who beat him. This wasn’t discovered until Jules came into a session with a significant limp, and obviously my neighbor was not happy with this discovery, so he decided to confront the parents at the end of the session.
The parents responded by saying, “We’re paying all this money to teach him how to fight, so we thought we would test it.” Mind you, most of these sessions were entirely free and any fees went towards maintenance and provision of equipment/gear for the kids. Neighbor asks the father if he regularly beats his children and if he himself is a good fighter. The father responds with a yes, whilst the mother is laughing her head off in the back.
Neighbor then proceeds to shove the father onto the dad’s car bonnet and starts to rain down axe kicks. Now the father has the choice of blocking the kicks and probably shattering his arms, or letting his bonnet get absolutely caved in. After about 8 or 9 of these, neighbor says, “You said you can fight, so I thought I would test you.” Anyways, the idiots end up calling the police, who care way more about Jules being abused than about the car. Parents eventually lost the kids and Jules now lives with his uncle and aunt who are absolute sweethearts.
7 years on, Jules just got his A-Level results, got into his dream university, and my neighbor is going to help him move into accommodation. They’re honestly like brothers now and it’s so beautiful.
1. You Pissed Off The Wrong Guy
My son was maybe 8 months old and was recently diagnosed as profoundly deaf. Deaf kids will often inhale to make vibrations and noise that they can somewhat “hear” for stimulation. We were on pins and needles as I had just lost my job and our insurance and the cochlear implant surgery was going to cost us $170k. We’d have to sell the house and one of the cars. We needed a break and our in-laws took us to the food court at a local mall. Our boy started to inhale and gasp.
“He needs a beating,” a fat twenty-something-year-old said not so quietly to her friends at the table next to us.
I rarely curse in public and am generally non-confrontational, but a stream of insulting profanity issued from my mouth for a good 10 minutes that would have put a sailor to shame. I found I couldn’t stop and it got on the verge of Bukowskian poetry.
I insulted her, her mother, her weight, and her pinched-faced friends. I launched into the smell of her unmentionables, how fat she was, how she’d only be able to reproduce with a blind drunken moron with a deathwish as she was uglier than the devil’s butthole on fire with the poop of hell. And it only progressed from there. F. Lee Ermey’s Marine Drill Sergeant from Full Metal Jacket would have told me to tone it down a bit. I told her he was deaf and that we couldn’t stop it and that this was a food court in a pissant Southern town filled with pissant inbred hellspawned redneck ignorant mutant troglodytes that embarrass normal troglodytes.
The food court was silent and all the eyes were upon us.
And then it progressed from there.
She got up and left crying.
I can honestly say the whole rant was involuntary, like a pus-filled boil popping and draining in a torrent. I had never done anything like this before and have not done it since. I feel bad for her to this day.