Surviving infidelity is one of life’s more challenging lessons. For these people on Quora, discovering their partner’s astonishing attempts at trying to hide their cheating ways was both shocking and heart-wrenching. From receiving bouquets meant for the mistress to realizing a child isn’t actually theirs, these tales of lies and deception are absolutely astounding.
1. Startling News
I learned of his infidelity when I came across a personal ad in the newspaper. It said that a woman, who lived in a neighboring town had met a man whom she had a great night with. She then went on to describe him. Well, my husband had certain features and employment that sounded exactly as the woman was describing. But that wasn't even the worst part.
She was trying to find him so they could meet up again. I was amused by the ad, thought nothing of it, and went on with my day. We had children, so I was busy picking them up from school and doing normal daily routines. The next day, I remembered the ad and thought I would read it again as it started to bother me.
So, I decided to call her just to put my mind at ease. I asked her who she was looking for. She mentioned a name different from my husband’s. She hadn’t thought to get his number, hence the ad. She said he passed through town often, due to his work and she wanted to see him again.
I told her he sounded a lot like someone I knew. So, I asked her a series of questions I had thought up that would either eliminate or confirm my suspicions. Her answers made my heart drop. Sadly, she confirmed that it was my husband—without a doubt. I wasn’t sure what to do with this new-found knowledge, so I slept on it.
The next day, I showed my husband the ad. He denied it of course, however, he couldn’t deny her physical description of him. This wasn’t the best way to find out that your husband was cheating. Although these days, I find it more amusing than I did back then.
2. Hurtful Lies
I went to my girlfriend’s place of work where I expected her to be, so that I could surprise her—but she wasn’t there. I knew something was up when her co-workers wouldn’t look me in the eye or give me any direct answers about where she was. They knew the situation and I did not, which was probably the most hurtful part. They all knew what was going on.
It turns out, she was at the movies with a male co-worker but told me she would be at work so that I wouldn’t suspect anything. Apparently, this had been going on for a while. I went on to find out that they would regularly spend break time at work doing things inside of his car—blatantly without any shame.
I randomly showed up a few more times at her work place to straighten the guy out as he knew of me and knew that the situation was wrong, but he conveniently stopped showing up at work altogether. He apparently had a lot to say about me and what he would do if he saw me come by, so it was funny to me that he all but disappeared.
Needless to say, we were done after that. She wasn’t a good person.
3. We’re Done Here
My husband used the same florist to send flowers to me and his mistress—stupidity at its best. Well, one day, the florist mixed up the orders and I ended up getting the ones meant for his mistress.
I took them to his office and threw them at him—a huge bouquet! Then, the second bouquet arrived for me as well—a much smaller one. I took that to him and threw it at his face a second time.
Yeah, that marriage was way, way over.
4. Darling Imposter
I found out my boyfriend was cheating from one of my girlfriends. She told me but I didn’t want to believe her. So she gave me an idea to download a texting and calling app which would give me another phone number. I started texting him with this new number, pretending that I was the girl he was cheating with.
He asked me very specific questions just to verify I was who I claimed to be. Luckily, I knew the answers because my girlfriend, who was with me at the time, knew the history of this sordid affair and helped me with the answers. Once he believed I was his mistress, I waited until the next day for him to call me.
Let’s just say that he was awfully confused when he ended up talking to me instead of to his mistress!
5. Stop Following Me
The woman who was having an affair with my husband started stalking me. It was very Fatal Attraction-like but without the bunny, thank goodness! At the beginning, I didn’t even know that I was being "stalked". It was back in the 90s and I didn’t even know the term "stalker" existed.
I started seeing the same woman at the supermarket, outside our apartment, in the same carriage on the train, even at events, like the New York Marathon. Everywhere I went, she seemed to be there. I pointed her out to my husband once and his reaction was very strange.
He got very agitated. In fact, he turned bright red and started walking rapidly in the opposite direction. If he hadn’t reacted so awkwardly, I would not have become suspicious, certainly not at that point. It transpired that he had broken off his affair with her and she was pressuring him to continue the relationship by stalking me.
I later found out that she had gotten pregnant and my husband had talked her into having an abortion. I don’t think she was mentally stable to begin with, but the abortion, and my husband’s cavalier treatment of her, really pushed her over the edge.
Sadly, things escalated even further from there but that’s a tale for another day.
6. Time To Go
I was at my wife’s office Christmas party which was held at her boss’s house. I was wandering around when I saw my wife standing in the main room, facing a wall and talking to someone. There was a younger man who was standing close to her with his back to her.
He was facing the opposite wall but I could see that they were talking. I watched this strange conversation for at least a minute before instantly knowing that she was cheating on me with him. About three weeks later, I caught them together.
Within a month, I had met his young wife who provided credit card records of their hotel trysts and I gave her the phone records that showed when they were on their way to meet up.
She was out of my house by early February.
7. Romantic Betrayal
It was my husband. I would call him at work to find out what time he would be home and his co-workers would act as if I was snitching or something. They always acted as if I shouldn’t be calling him. This went on for quite a while.
Finally, I asked someone what the problem was. Their answer shocked me to the core. The co-worker said that he didn’t think I should be calling all the time since we were divorced. I said, "What?! We aren’t divorced". He then hung up on me.
I tried calling back but every time someone answered and realized who was calling, they just hung up. Later that night, I tried confronting my husband but he claimed he had no idea what I was talking about. The next few days, I tried calling him at work but they refused to take a message.
I confronted him several times asking what was going on. Finally, he admitted he had told them he was divorced because he wanted to take his girlfriend to the work Christmas party instead of me.
8. A Draining Experience
I discovered my wife was cheating when I opened the bill from Victoria's Secret and saw $500 worth of lingerie purchased. She had applied for a card in my name and forged my signature. At that point, we had been sleeping in separate rooms for nearly a decade.
My ex also drained my retirement account of $100,000. I finally left her and had to take a home equity loan out to clear $40,000 in credit card debt. My kids were already brainwashed into believing that their dad was a cheap, deadbeat, horrible parent. That was four years ago and they are now just starting to understand.
9. Happily Never After
We we're living with my cousin at the time—well, mainly only me as my wife was rarely ever home. One day, my cousin’s ex-wife approached me and said that I might want to get tested. Apparently, her little brother had some infection that I had never heard of and that my wife was the only person he had ever slept with.
Obviously, I confronted my wife about the infidelity. But I never said who gave me the information, only that I had proof. She eventually confessed to having an ongoing affair with my cousin's best friend!
It was a surprise to no one that we divorced shortly after. My friends threw me a week-long celebration party once it was official.
10. Stunning Revelation
The mistress called me when she was five months pregnant to inform me the child I was helping to provide for was in fact my husband's. They had slept together right after my daughter was born and I was working on Christmas to get the bonus to provide for him, myself, our two children, AND her and her son!
Needless to say, a divorce followed shortly after.
11. This Is The End
Halfway into a 12-hour shift, my co-workers and I were offered a ridiculous sum of money to complete the job for 8 am on Saturday morning—meaning a 24-hour shift. I called my fiancée to let her know what was happening and she was okay with it.
We hammered into the workload and finished at 2 am. I drove home and when I walked in, I was greeted by a horrifying sight. My fiancée was on the lounge floor fornicating with some old man. I stepped over them, went to our bedroom, packed an overnight bag and left.
At 9 am the next morning, I got the rest of my possessions, threw all of her possessions out of the house, changed the locks and put the house up for sale—all by 12 noon.
I haven't seen nor heard from her since.
12. What An Idiot
I didn't have to be a rocket scientist to discover what was going on. He was wearing a heavy wool turtleneck sweater in May! I knew he hated having his neck subjected to tight clothing.
So as I hugged him, I pretended to act dumb, while pulling his sweater down. Duh! There were love marks on his neck—also known as hickeys! I told him, "You’re such a jerk! Have a nice life!"
13. A Lump In My Throat
I felt something was wrong when I dropped her off at work and watched her walk into the building. I came back at lunch to surprise her only to find out from one of her friends that she never showed up to work that day. When I sent her a text regarding her whereabouts, she said that she was swamped with work.
So I told her to meet me outside her building because I had a gift for her. At this point, she had no other choice but to come clean. So I waited and waited until I saw her getting dropped off by another man. Talk about getting a lump in your throat. It felt awful but I needed to see it with my own eyes.
14. Caught Red-Handed
I was in my sophomore year, at a college that was about an hour and a half away from my home. I decided to go home one weekend to surprise my boyfriend. I showed up at this party he was at. He had a stunned look on his face. All his friends looked shocked as well.
My boyfriend kept trying to leave the party, giving me various excuses. I finally went outside to see him arguing with another girl. It turns out, he was dating someone else while I was at college. He obviously didn't expect me to have shown up to bust him red-handed.
Too bad for him!
15. Beauty Product Truths
Things were serious between us. We lived in different states but still got together at least twice a month. The subject of my relocating was very much on the table. He picked me up at the airport, and when we got to his place, I noticed something strange.
There were hair ties hanging on the doorknob of his bedroom. "Whose are those"? I asked. He said, "They’re yours. They were on the floor in the bedroom so I’ve been saving them there for you". I do use hair elastics. Like most women, I leave them everywhere.
But these were different from the kind that I used. I am very conscientious about taking good care of my long hair. Years earlier, I had learned that hair elastics with metal hardware can cause breakage. So I never, ever used those because of the metal bits—not even in emergencies.
Yet there they were—three of them hanging on his doorknob. Finally, he said, "Okay, maybe one of my friend’s girlfriends had come over and left them behind". This was certainly plausible, but he’d already made the mistake of saying he found them in the bedroom.
The hair ties alone were not enough to cause me to believe he was cheating, but my radar was up. It turns out that these were the first of several clues that another girl had been visiting the house: there was a jar of drugstore hand cream in a drawer, my Halo shower gel was being depleted...
I don’t always have the best intuition, but I know what beauty products I use.
16. When Truth And Fiction Are Blurred
My husband left my work party early to return home, but when I got home, he wasn’t there. I saw the answering machine blinking, signaling a new message. Well, I guess the machine picked up their steamy phone call. I didn't know who it was from, however, my 13-year-old son recognized the voice—I was shocked.
The next day, it was Mother's Day. We went for dinner at his mother’s house. At the table, my five-year-old daughter announced that her dad had a new girlfriend. I almost disappeared. Happy Mother’s Day.
17. Lost For Words
I was programming the address into his navigation system for our evening out when I noticed an address I didn’t recognize. It was the most recent one and it looked like a residential address in another suburb, not somewhere he usually visited.
"Hmmm—what’s this address?" I asked. The car got very quiet—and I knew.
18. That Was Lame
I was googling things online one evening, when out of nowhere, I stumbled upon something that made my heart drop. I saw my dear husband half-dressed on a dating website! I was shocked beyond belief!
I read his interests and not one of them sounded at all like the man I had married! Travel? Trying new cuisine? What??? Plus, he didn't even say that he was married—he was just "In a relationship".
The whole thing was outrageous, and I was enraged! I have to be anonymous here because despite his betrayal, I stayed with him.
19. A Gut Feeling
My intuition told me the truth. It actually gave me proof. But to this day, he still thinks I had him followed. That morning, I asked him to drop my son off at school but he said that he had to attend a very important meeting at the office that he couldn’t miss.
He had his own company so it wasn’t uncommon for him to work late. But that night, he came home extra late. When he arrived home, he said that he wasn't feeling well and asked for a cup of tea. I was about to make his tea, when a message unfolded in my mind: go and check his shoes, and put my hand in his shoes.
It did not make any sense so I ignored the thought but the internal feeling persisted. So I finally checked his shoes...and discovered that they were full of sand.
Well, you guessed it. He wasn’t at work. He was at the beach.
20. Try Digesting This
There was this Chinese buffet in my hometown where I used to eat quite regularly—probably more often than a person who is interested in their health and well-being should. The woman at the front desk would seat me herself, and bring me my drink, rather than the wait staff.
The head chef would always come out, greet me, give me a polite smile, and ask if I wanted anything specially made—of which I never really took advantage of. In other words, these people knew who I was and actually cared about my business. I used to go there all the time with my then-girlfriend.
One day, I went in there alone on my lunch break. The woman at the front desk approached me at my table. She asked, "Did you and your girlfriend break up?" I was confused. "Uh—no"?
"Oh". She then said, very matter-of-factly, "She came in here earlier with another man. She kissed him". I was shocked. "What? She did?"
"Yeah!" she said, very excitedly, and pointed to a table. "She sat over there". So I texted my then-girlfriend: "Hey, I’m at the buffet for lunch. Wanna join me"? She replied, "No. I already ate".
"Ah, cool. Where did you go"? I texted. She replied, "My mom’s". So I said, "Really? Because the waitress said she saw you here earlier". Five minutes later, she texted, "Yeah, I went there. But I didn’t eat anything".
At that point, I lost interest in pursuing the truth, so I just replied, "Cool. We’re done".
I left the woman at the desk a $20 tip.
21. Suspicious Minds
I was on a vacation by myself in Montreal the day I found out. We were supposed to be together on this trip but he had to cancel because he had to go to San Francisco for school. We had been dating for eight months by that time. He was a very sweet, family-oriented, and a very faithful Catholic.
From the moment I woke up on the day I was leaving Montreal to go to Quebec City, I felt something bad was happening. I kept checking my belongings, money, and itineraries but I couldn’t find anything missing. So I started preparing for the day, but my gut feeling kept growing stronger and stronger.
I stopped for a moment and thought about what it could be. I called my parents and friends to make sure they were all okay, and then finally, I realized that the last time I had felt like this was when my ex was cheating on me. I said to myself that this was an impossible thing to happen.
So I continued packing. I was just about to leave the hotel room, standing at the doorway, when I felt the need to check my email. Long story short, I found out that he was indeed cheating on me. I’m glad I listened to my intuition.
22. Too Little, Too Late
I was about to marry this girl who claimed she was madly in love with me and couldn’t wait to marry me. One day, I genuinely surprised her just by entering the room. She looked completely shocked and ever-so scared. Without uttering a word, she started to press her fingers over her phone.
Any stupid person would instantly recognize that she wanted to hide something. A little push and she revealed it all by herself. She apologized for cheating and promised to never repeat the mistake again. But, the train had left the platform long ago!
23. A Notification To Forget
I have known my boyfriend since the seventh grade. One day, he used my work computer to email his mistress but forgot to log out. That was a big mistake. When she responded, I was notified. I pretended to be my boyfriend to get her to respond, which she did. Her responses confirmed what the situation was.
I left him almost immediately.
24. Flowers For The Birthday Girl
It was my wife's birthday, so I went to the florist to have some flowers delivered to her at work. When I gave the clerk the name and address to deliver them to, she commented, "Huh—we just had another order for her at the same place".
I replied, "That's interesting", and canceled my order. When we all got home that evening, we had the biggest argument. Some birthday celebration!!!
25. Conception Deception
It was late on a Sunday night, and I had just finished my weekend shift. The kids and my then-wife weren’t home. There was no note saying where they had gone. At 9:30 pm, she finally arrived back home. I asked where she had been, and she just glared at me.
She was holding the baby, as the four other young sleepy heads drifted off to their beds. I said, "It would have been nice to have known where everyone was".
She then stared directly at me, and in a contemptuous voice said, "And you think this last one is yours?"
26. Dishonesty Hurts
My boyfriend and I were putting away Christmas decorations in the attic. He was standing on a ladder and while I looked up at him from the ground, I saw a very long blond hair hanging out of his shoe. So I made a comment that completely set him off.
I mentioned that the only way the strand of hair could’ve gotten in his shoe was for him to have taken his shoes off in some blonde's house. He got so defensive that I knew he had been cheating on me. He grabbed his belongings and stormed out of my house.
27. Lies And A Broken Heart
My 12-year-old son told me. It still hurts my heart that he had to know about his dad's infidelity months before I did. He refuses to see his dad to this day.
I made sure to gently bring this matter up with my son, to tell him that he did the right thing and that even if his dad made a mistake, that he was still his dad. I told him that it's okay to be angry at his dad, but not to stay angry for too long. I told him to forgive his dad, as I had eventually forgiven him.
His dad is out of my life but it doesn't mean that he has to be out of my son's.
28. I Was Fooled
A postcard arrived in the mail. It was from a travel agent that read, "Hope you had a wonderful time in the Philippines!" It ended with the usual, "Contact me for all your future travel needs".
My husband had just left the day before, on an alleged week-long business trip.
29. Voices In The Night
He was walking around in the dark upstairs. I heard voices, and thought it was our four-year-old son getting out of bed. But I stopped to listen...and discovered the heartbreaking truth.
"I love you". He said it three times during the conversation and assured her that I had no idea. I was in the basement on the computer. My knees came out from under me.
When he started down the stairs, he saw me sitting at the bottom. I kicked him out that night. Life goes on.
30. What A Nightmare
I saw him cheating on me in a dream. We both lived with my cousin at the time and one night, I had a dream that my boyfriend and cousin were literally fornicating in front of me on the couch.
I woke up in a panic and looked over to see my boyfriend in bed next to me, sound asleep and NOT fornicating with my cousin, who was probably asleep in the room next to us. The next morning, I told him about my dream and he laughed hysterically saying, "You're even more nuts and insecure in your dreams!"
A couple hours later, while he hopped in the shower— I had NEVER DONE THIS BEFORE—I decided to check his phone. Lo and behold, the last text he sent out was to my cousin, and it read: "Oh my god, Jessica had a dream that we were doing it. You don't think she actually knows that we are?"
So apparently I wasn't as nuts and insecure as I thought.
31. Can’t Fool Me
I knew he was cheating because he stopped taking his shower before bed. Instead, before work, he would stop at her place and take a shower afterwards. How stupid was he?
32. More Money, More Problems
I found out about her infidelity from Wells Fargo Bank. I was looking at my laptop when I got an email from the bank confirming the request to change the address on our joint checking account.
I looked at Christie, and asked if she’d made any recent banking changes. She told me it must’ve been a mistake. She had only recently opened a small savings account for each of the boys, as well as a new checking account for herself.
I thanked her, and said I planned to do the same thing, but hadn’t gotten around to it yet. But then an alarm went off in my head. I asked why the statement address for her new account was a PO box in La Jolla—a different city.
Her eyes filled with tears as she said, "I’m sorry, I didn’t want you to find out like this. It’s Ed’s". One has to wonder how I was supposed to find out—and when.
33. Are You Serious?
One day, I was over at my boyfriend’s place. My best friend was also with me. She and I were about to head out somewhere but needed to search up some information. So I asked if we could quickly use his laptop. As my friend started searching online, a notification popped up on the screen.
It was a private message from a girl on a dating site. She and I looked at each other in confusion. Later, I confronted him. His answer?
"Oh, yeah, there’s a virus on my modem which causes these pop-ups".
I actually laughed in his face. The truth eventually came out.
34. Stupidity At Its Best
My ex had left to go visit his mom out of state. Two days after he left, his mom called looking for him. I said, "Isn’t he with you"? She said, "No Suzanne, he's coming in three days".
Ok, wait. He’s been gone all these days? Where was he?
I sent him a text to tell him his mom was looking for him. He finally called me back with some idiotic story and one excuse after another.
Cheaters are so stupid.
35. Difficult Times
After one of my wife’s night shifts, I found a man's shirt in the back seat of our car. "Oh", she said, "it’s a surprise for you". I made a point of washing it and wearing it the next day. Then it disappeared and I hadn’t seen it since. But I knew darn well what was going on when I found it.
It was a bad time for us. Believe it or not, we both worked hard at our marriage and refused to give up on each other. We lasted another 30 years until she was gone. It can be done.
36. Signature Trade Mark
I was picking up clothes from the dry cleaners one afternoon. At the same time, another girl was picking up her clothes. That’s when I noticed my trademark stitching on the inner lapels of the wedding suit she was picking up. Upon recognizing the suit I had designed, I knew something was horribly wrong.
I asked the girl if it belonged to her boyfriend. She was clueless about us, so she gave me all the details—how he is the love of her life, how their fairytale romance began in their college days five years ago. She was getting the dress ready for him so that she could introduce him to her entire family at her brother's wedding.
I had introduced myself as the suit’s designer. That’s when she showed me the pictures of her boyfriend and asked if I would help her find matching attires. My then-boyfriend lived in another city, 300 km (185 miles) away. He used to meet me on some weekends.
We were in a relationship for less than a year. Both of us were in our early 20s and solely focused on our careers. Our relationship had started at his best friend’s wedding where the bride was my roommate for three years. Later, it was all weekend treks, parties, and fun outings.
Whenever I wanted to discuss anything serious about our lives, his excuse was that we have the rest of our lives to figure it out. I always had suspicions about his loyalty but now I had all the proof. I never gave him any heck for his cheating, I simply blocked him from my life.
37. Kiss And Tell
I was in high school. I was walking through the hall with my boyfriend at the time. My best friend, also a guy, came up to us and yelled at my boyfriend for kissing his girlfriend. Then, my best friend declared he was going to repay the favor and kissed me square on the lips.
It happened so fast, I didn’t have time to react. I just stood there frozen as my best friend walked away. And then I dumped my boyfriend.
38. Lies Upon Lies
I found out that he was cheating after he broke up with me out of the blue. A couple of weeks after the break-up, I just got this feeling. I had asked him afterward if there was anyone else, and he told me no. But I didn’t believe that.
So I checked the dating site where we’d met, and there he was, "active" and "online". He had kept the same profile and updated it with movies we’d seen and places we’d traveled to.
He probably kept his account active for the entire two years we were together. It was a stunning revelation.
39. Stunning Discovery
My husband had a hotel charge on his credit card statement that was dated on my birthday. He had gone to that city where the hotel is located, on my birthday, so I knew it was him. He did not attend my birthday party as he had "other plans".
I called the hotel to confirm but they couldn’t tell me anything other than a photo ID was required in order to use a credit card. Well, he ended up canceling his card and lied so much to get out of trouble. I stayed with him for some years after that but eventually decided to divorce him.
40. Such A Fraudster
We had gone out of town for the weekend to his parents' house. We were in bed watching some late-night TV on Amazon Prime but had forgotten the fire stick remote back home. Luckily, we discovered that we could use an app in place of the remote.
So we downloaded it on his phone. When the movie ended, he fell asleep before me. I wanted to turn off the TV so I got his phone from his side of the bed to access the app. That's when my world came crashing down.
I double-clicked his iPhone and whilst doing that, I saw some messages that seemed suspicious and from numbers that weren’t saved on his phone. I wasn’t one to invade his privacy, but somehow, I just felt that I should look through the messages.
There were tons of messages from unsaved numbers and I went through all of them. Then I found a thread between him and the girl he had slept with. I read the messages and all the intimate details including one night how he couldn’t see her because he had to go visit a friend—meaning me, his girlfriend.
Needless to say, I broke up with him.
41. We’re Just Friends
I found out through Facebook. He took a photo with the other girl he was seeing. She posted the photo on Facebook with the caption "#him".
I asked him about the photo, and he denied it at first: "We are just friends. She's obviously in love with me but I don't even like her". He said that I was reading too much into the caption, and so on.
I knew he was lying, so I ended things. He eventually admitted that he cheated and apologized.
42. A Christmas To Remember
It was 10 pm on Christmas Eve. My husband said that he was at work. So I decided to call him to see how he was doing. It was almost Christmas, after all. But when I called, a girl answered. I was shocked.
He not only was cheating on me but he was about to celebrate Christmas with his girlfriend instead of with me and our kids. It was heart-breaking, considering it was just a few months after our first wedding anniversary.
43. Darling Little Secret
My wife was flying off to her high school friend’s wedding. We had been married for over 25 years. I offered to go with her but she refused. She thought of taking her brother because he knew the bride. In the end, she decided that she would go alone.
Lo and behold, the day of her flight, I received a call to our house saying that my wife’s flight was delayed. The message also mentioned a name on the second ticket—which was not mine, but her lover’s.
She called when she had arrived at her destination and I said we'd talk when she got back. Upon returning, I gave her multiple chances to come clean with her excuses but I'll never be able to trust her again.
44. Excuses, Excuses
During my first year in college, I was casually seeing a guy I was introduced to by a girl I knew. I was just healing from a recent break-up, so I decided to give it a shot. One day, my female friend invited us to a party to celebrate her getting a new apartment. But the celebration quickly took a turn for the worst.
My partner and I wanted to go together, to show our group of friends that we were a couple. Once we got there, my partner put his phone on the table to light-up a smoke and shortly after he received a random notification. This was interesting because it meant his phone was automatically connected to the wi-fi.
It was quite strange since we had just arrived. I didn’t recall him asking for the wi-fi password, and my friend actually just moved into her apartment. Did he get a private VIP tour before the other guests arrived? When I asked him about it, he looked stunned and shocked beyond belief.
Just one year ago, I would’ve made a scene out of this, break something, and leave. But I didn’t want to embarrass myself in front of everybody. I especially didn’t want to give him the pleasure of receiving the "social credit" and public validation that he was sleeping with two hot girls at the same time.
Instead, I just pretended to buy his incoherent excuses that he came up with. I stayed for a few hours, had a glass of sherry, and told everybody I had an early class the next day and left. I never saw him again.
45. Secret Rendez-Vous
I have two phones: my personal cell and my work cell. I changed the contact name of my work cell to the guy’s name I suspected my girlfriend was cheating with. One night when I was out of town for work, I texted her from my work cell and asked her out.
She saw the text pop up under this other guy’s name and agreed to the date. She then texted my personal cell to say, "I am going to bed. Goodnight. I love you". She then texted my work cell, thinking it was her lover and told him that she would meet him in 15 minutes.
She was shocked when I called her on my work cell.
46. A Numbing Experience
We were engaged and moving house at the time. I found a movie ticket whilst unpacking boxes in our new home. My fiancé had told me that he was running errands that afternoon. He even sent me photos of him enjoying a coffee not far from the movie theater, so I thought nothing of it—at first.
But then I knew something wasn't right as soon as I looked at it. My gut feeling was telling me that something wasn’t right. He wasn't home at the time. He was at work. So I remained calm and decided to do some investigating. I thought back to our conversations during the day.
He had told me that he had to meet a new work manager to discuss a new contract that afternoon. But he didn’t respond to any of my messages that I had left between 5:30 pm-9:30 pm. Well, the movie was at 6:30 pm. I didn't cry or get mad. I just felt numb.
I waited until he got home and he knew instantly that something was wrong. I showed him the ticket and said, "I don't remember seeing this movie with you—was it good?" The look on his face was all I needed. It was almost as if every emotion had been swept away.
His face went blank. He denied any wrong-doing, of course, and not long afterwards, turned very defensive. He hissed at me, "Are you REALLY going to go there with me? Are you really going to accuse ME of that? Be VERY careful with what you are about to say!"
I stood still, looking him in the eye. Both of us stayed silent. I knew him so well. And I knew what his reaction meant. I knew that he was unfaithful to his previous partner. He had many affairs. He lied continuously. I should have been smarter—what made me think that I could change a man like that?
Onwards and upwards. It's time to love myself.
47. Letters of Deception
I was up in the middle of the night with our crying seven-week-old baby. While walking around the house, trying to calm her down, I picked up my husband's work pants from the previous day off the bathroom floor to put in the laundry. When I picked them up, I felt something in the pocket.
So I pulled it out and saw it was a handwritten letter. While holding our newborn baby in one arm, I proceeded to read a four-page letter from my husband's 17-year-old girlfriend. He was 26. She knew all about me and our baby and was begging him to leave us.
It turns out that he had been seeing her on the side, after work and at every other chance he got. The fact that he suddenly needed to get smokes every night and be gone for hours when the store was only five minutes away now made total sense.
This is something I normally would have noticed and questioned immediately, but being exhausted and overwhelmed from being a first-time mom had me off my game. He knew this and took full advantage of it.
Of course we divorced soon after. I'm now remarried to the best husband in the world.
48. A Shocking Delivery
While in the hospital giving birth to our first child, I found out that my husband was having an affair with my nurse. I could tell by the look of shock on her face when he walked into the delivery room.
She took leave for the rest of the time I was there. I confronted him and he admitted it. I forgave him but he cheated again a year later and that was it.
49. A Sad Revelation
I got home from work one day and discovered that a dog had knocked my trash all over my yard. As I started picking it up, I found a torn-up envelope with a return address and man's name hand written on it. It caught my eye but I didn’t think anything of it until I found another piece of the envelope with my wife's name and a PO box number. We didn't have a PO box.
So I went to where she worked and told her my truck had broken down and needed her car for a few minutes. She handed me the keys. I then went to the post office, located the box and used her key to open it. There were three letters from the guy she was cheating on me with. I then went back to return her keys. I left the letters in the driver's seat.
She called that night from her sister’s house. It didn't go well after that.
50. He Did The Unthinkable
I was four years into what I thought was a monogamous relationship. Then I got itchy—literally. A little investigation revealed the ugly truth. I had enough crabs to stock a bay. When I asked my partner about it he said, "Well this guy at the bar was plastered, so I decided to walk him home—I didn't want to but—um—I sat on the bed—I didn't do anything, but they must have crawled up my leg—um—"
Romantic betrayal is so hard on some of us because we can't understand it. You cut a square deal, that's what you do. Lying to a partner would undermine my self-respect. So I would never do it. When I found out that my partner would and actually did lie to me, the shock was enormous.
Bees could have been flying out of his butt and I wouldn't have been more stunned. We stayed together for another six years but it was clear that he was incapable of honestly stating his wants and needs. I have no idea why, and I don't think he does either.