The Deepest, Darkest Secrets

July 29, 2022 | Scott Mazza

The Deepest, Darkest Secrets


Although we like to pretend that we can keep all our skeletons locked up in the closet, the truth is that the bigger the secret, the more it needs to come out. Nobody knows that better than these Redditors, who had been holding back life-ruining secrets, only to confess them anonymously to the world. Get ready for some shockers.


1. Guilty, Your Honor

I've been practicing law for three years now, but there's something that keeps haunting me. You see, I never actually completed my law degree. I had four subjects that I never passed. As desperate as it sounds, I managed to get my Bar certification by sidestepping the official route and greasing the hands of people connected to the Bar association. But my secret is about to explode in my face...I can feel it.

As a litigator, I made a major blunder on my current case. I lied to the client I was representing, and as a result, he suffered a significant loss in court yesterday. The judge advised him to seek help from the Bar association for possible compensation, and now they are setting up a committee to scrutinize me and my work. Among the committee members is a senior attorney who has always seemed a little wary of me.

A classmate of mine is employed by this experienced attorney's firm and has likely shared news about my struggles during law school. This attorney has been straightforward about his intentions, saying that he will delve into the truth of my law degree. There's no easy way to rectify this situation.

The university where I began my law studies ended up spinning off its law school to form a new, separate university. During this transition, they reached out to me about potentially resuming my studies there. But I left the offer unanswered.

Now, even if I could miraculously complete and pass my remaining subjects before the investigation gains momentum, my degree will come from a completely different institution than the one I initially submitted in my Bar enrollment documents. This discrepancy could lead to substantial claims against me from both my current and past clients. To make matters worse, I could end up facing time in jail.

But it's still not over. I am engaged to be married in November of this year. Revealing my situation to my loved ones, including my future spouse, makes me feel sick with worry. I am unsure how to confess my mistakes and face the aftermath.

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2. More Than A Difference Of Opinion

I made the tough decision to walk out of a sect, while all my family members continue to remain a part of it. As hard as it might be, if I am honest with them, telling them that I no longer believe in the cause, it would mean saying goodbye to them forever. And no, I'm not joking.

Once they learn of my disbelief, all communications and associations with them, including my wife, would come to an end. I risk losing relationships built over decades - I'm talking about my parents, siblings, friends, all distanced in the blink of an eye. Some, including my own family, have already started hinting that I'm not a part of their future anymore.

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3. A Moment Of Weakness

I'm currently dating somebody and we're in a long-distance relationship. I deeply care about her. However, I recently did something I think I'm going to regret. My housemate, a single woman who is a decade older than me, asked me for a rather unusual favor. She had been longing to have a child but could not afford the steep cost of a sperm bank. She insisted that the baby's paternity would remain secret.

Although I'd previously rejected her advances toward me, her repeated requests gradually wore me down and I gave in. All seemed reasonable enough at the time, I mean, it seemed like the right thing to do. How could anything go terribly wrong? Now that my roommate is pregnant, the magnitude of what I've done is beginning to dawn on me. Either I have to keep this from my girlfriend forever, or I have to face the inevitable: coming clean but risking the end of our relationship.

One day somewhere down the line, there's going to be a young person asking about their father. When my roommate mentions my name, I can anticipate that call, be it 16 or 18 years from now. No matter where I am, who I am with, or whether I have children of my own, I'll hear the words, "Hey, I'm your kid. You knew that, right? Why weren't you there for me?" And it STILL gets worse.

To complicate matters further, my roommate has been feeling quite lonely. She constantly seeks companionship, making attempts to share my bed and spend considerable amounts of time with me. These overtures fill me with guilt - if I oblige her, I feel like I'm betraying my girlfriend, and if I keep my distance, I feel bad for disregarding my roommate's feelings. It seems inescapable until I can afford to move. I'm burdened by this guilt, and it feels like it could last my entire life - my entire, darn life.

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4. A High Price To Pay

I have to confess something quite difficult to admit: my feelings for my wife have changed, and unfortunately, I've realized that I no longer love her as I once did. However, that's not even the most challenging part of this situation. She's currently expecting a child, and to be quite frank, it's a child I wasn't prepared for.

The way I see it, this upcoming addition to our family seems less like a bundle of joy and more like a financial responsibility that we're not in a position to take on. Affording a child is not an easy task, and our current financial state makes the impending arrival even more daunting.

Perhaps the most terrifying aspect of all this is pondering divorce as a possible solution. I live in a state that has a history of burdening the father with heavy child support in these sort of situations. The mere thought of leaving my wife yet still having a significant financial obligation is enough to fill me with fear.

As this was a very sensitive confession, I chose to share it anonymously under the username Throwaway_138. It's difficult to openly discuss such issues, yet I find relief in expressing my feelings.

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5. Forbidden Love

I have a confession to make, and it's something I've kept to myself for quite some time. My feelings are tangled and complicate an already impossible situation. My affection seems to have shifted towards my ex-girlfriend's daughter, a woman I've known since she was just 12 years old. Yeah, it's as bad as it sounds.

For eight long years, I stayed in a relationship with her mother, driven primarily by the heartache I felt thinking that I might never see her daughter again. Yep, the situation that heavy. There were three incidents where I felt like something more could have happened between me and her, had I given them a little nudge. One of these occasions was when she was still not of age, and the other two times happened after she reached adulthood.

From my perspective, it seemed like she harbored similar feelings for me too, though we never really had a heart-to-heart about these emotions. I'm a decade older than her, and funnily enough, I was a few years younger than her mother. I never had trouble attracting women, and I've always found myself in relationships.

Now, the tricky part is, during the periods that I didn't see her, I tried to convince myself that these feelings were just a figment of my confused emotions. Yet with every return and every wonderful smile she flashed my way, I found myself smitten all over again. A wave of affection so strong it was almost unbearable washed over me.

Even out of respect for her mother and the difficulty of the situation, I refrained from making a move. I'd like to believe that she too felt similarly, though it was an unspoken truth between us. Even after I ended my relationship with her mother, I clung onto the friendship, primarily because the thought of never seeing her daughter again was too much to bear.

I spend a significant portion of my time thinking about her, and I find it challenging to shake off these feelings when I compare them to what I feel for other women. I understand that my emotions have been unusual, considering they started when she was just 12, yet I can assure you I've never acted inappropriately and I would never dream of doing so.

Despite the twisted nature of our relationship, it was her radiant presence that gave value to my otherwise meaningless relationship with her mother. Reflecting on it now, I realize it wasn't fair to either of them. Even though it is unlikely I'll ever express my feelings, it is a relief to finally confess what's been haunting me all these years. This secret has remained buried deep within, but today, I'm just happy to get it off my chest.

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6. A Face To Meet The Faces That You Meet

So I keep a straight face, tell everyone everything's perfectly fine, and carry on. The truth is, it's only a matter of time before I truly, really snap. Not in a violent way, just...break. Mentally, but also physically. If worse comes to worst, I could never afford the medical bills for a prolonged hospital stay. So I keep faking it, at least for now...

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7. Rise And Grind

Every day is a routine - getting up, cleaning up and dressing in my office attire. Part of my morning ritual is sipping a cup of coffee as I settle behind my desk at work. To the outside eye, I might appear as your typical, slightly mundane American IT office worker. I play that role pretty well and blend in with my contemporaries who, I must confess, can sometimes be uninspiring and quite unfamiliar with the broader world around them.

Their day-to-day conversations revolve around their viewpoints on subjects such as foreign affairs, government, and economics - topics I politely indulge them to talk about. I also often find myself listening to their elaborately spun yarns about their adventures, fishing or hiking, or their wonderful exploits during their travels to eye-opening locations such as post-revolutionary Egypt.

Such conversational topics are a regular part of my everyday life. But inside, I often feel a sense of frustration bubbling up - because they have no idea about my dark past. See, I was once a covert agent. I've experienced the thrill of viewing Hong Kong from 25,000 feet while being ejected from an unauthorized aircraft. I've had the privilege of meeting influential people like Sheiks and Princes, and I've navigated the Mediterranean seas onboard a boat laden with refugees.

I've counteracted missile attacks, have leaped from a swiftly moving train, and have literally been in close proximity to weapons of mass destruction. I am fully cognizant of the amount Chevron might pay to relocate a village in Nigeria. And yet, while sitting there, buried in my seemingly insignificant spreadsheets, I can't utter a single syllable about my past to these unsuspecting folks who are so convinced about how the world operates. Unleashing all these truths feels so liberating, and yet I remain anonymous.

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8. Carrying A Flame

For the past half-decade, I've been head over heels, enduringly in love with my best bud. We've both seen other folks, we've relocated to different places, and we've lived entirely different lives. Yet my love for every little piece of him is so strong that it overtakes me. No matter what I do, I simply can't shake him off my mind, and I doubt I ever will.

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9. Out Of My League, Out Of My Life?

I'm deeply in love with my future wife, but there's an area of strain in our relationship that's putting me off. Over the past few years, I've noticed my fiancée's lack of interest in our intimate moments. Despite trying various tactics to spark her interest, our differences in this regard have led to numerous disagreements and eventually, a sense of resignation on my part. I'm someone who enjoys physical intimacy a lot, a trait she too possessed back when we started dating.

Currently, our moments of passion are becoming few and far between, only happening a couple of times a month at best. Even during those times, our scenes of intimacy feel rushed, with minimal desire for mutual satisfaction. What bothers me, even more, is this situation's effect on my self-esteem. I've started feeling less attractive and unwanted, which is also reflecting my ability to reciprocate affection. Complicating things is the fact that she is an incredibly attractive, vivacious woman who, in the eyes of others, is way out of my league.

My friends constantly put me under stress by showering praises about her and instigating me to get married. If I decide against it, they say, I'd be a fool. We live under the same roof, but as time passes, I find myself becoming more and more disconnected from her and my friends. The tension coupled with the fear of marrying her, even when I know something doesn't feel right, is mentally exhausting. As a way to escape this pressure-cooker situation, I've started burying myself in video games, while she's either watching TV or enjoying an evening out with her friends.

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10. Mommy’s Little Secret

While the little girl I've known as my daughter doesn't share my DNA, she holds a special place in my heart. This bittersweet reality dawned on me when my soon-to-be-wife participated in a Tough Mudder event - a challenging mud run - the weekend our sweet baby girl was conceived.

Before realizing the truth, a knot twisted in my stomach, prompted me to take an action. I seized an opportunity one day when my fiancée was at work and I was at home babysitting. Secretly, I took the baby for a DNA test, mirroring scenes you might see on shows like Maury. Inevitably, the test confirmed my worst fears: I was not the biological father.

To add to the confusion, I consulted a doctor, who confirmed that I am unable to father a child. Every fiber of my being was thrown into turmoil by the revelation of this life-altering secret.

Although this little girl is not my own by blood, my ardent love for her drives me to maintain the charade. It stings every time someone comments on her likeness to her mother, but never me. However, the mere thought of voicing this truth to her is unbearable. The pain caused by her exclusion from my life would far outweigh this, and I refuse to let that happen.

To her, I've always been and will remain her loving and devoted father. Her unconditional love for me is an irreplaceable treasure I wouldn't trade for anything. While it is a complex, secretive existence I've chosen, I remind myself that I can't let this affect the bond I've established with her.

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11. Food For Thought

I'm actually quite a respected chef, even if you haven't seen me with a TV show of my own. A few FoodTV pieces have featured me and I've also dabbled in some cooking content for The Cooking Channel. Anthony Bourdain, interestingly enough, once paid a visit to one of my establishments in the early stages of his show, "No Reservations." But if people knew my secret, they'd be shock: I genuinely detest a large portion of the food I come up with professionally.

I mostly cater to the very wealthy and elite, who can behave quite blindly when it comes to culinary sophistication. It seems that as long as I describe any dish as "braised," paired with "truffle oil," and crowned with a hint of "caviar," they fall over themselves to compliment and enjoy it. All thanks to placing a few select buzzwords into the mix. Some might call this kind of behavior quite stuck-up.

These folks only shop brands and their judgment around food operates in a similar fashion. If I strategically place key words on my menu or incorporate signature ingredients into the dishes, they'll praise the taste and pronounce their adoration. The majority, who gloat about having refined taste buds and an elevated appreciation for cuisine, are frankly, over-egging the pudding. I'm earnestly considering selling my stake in the pair of restaurants I own to my fellow entrepreneur or different investors—I'm ready for a change.

What's calling me is the simplistic satisfaction of a small establishment, specializing in crispy fried chicken wings. I’m tired of all the ostentatious stuff like foie gras and caviar.

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12. Not As Easy As Rebounding

I am honestly still deeply in love with my ex-girlfriend. She crosses my mind every day, and I find myself wishing that I could call her mine again. It's been over two years that I've been in a relationship with my current girlfriend, but honestly, whenever I run into my ex, it's too tough to handle my emotions.

Truth be told, I don't feel the same kind of love for my current girlfriend, even though I sincerely wish I did. Honestly, the only reason I started dating her was in the hope that it might help me forget about my ex.

Every month or so, I happen to cross paths with my ex. I should clarify - we don't actually have conversations, it's just fleeting moments of seeing her. However, each encounter, though brief, leaves me emotionally distressed for days on end.throwmeawayplz89

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13. Phoning It In

You know, if you were to ask me, I'd say I'm living a sham of a life. I spend most days practically motionless at my desk, maybe doing about, I'd say, a quarter of an hour of actual work when I'm having a good day. And sure, I get requests for assistance here and there, but over time, people just stop pestering me. Perhaps their issues resolved on their own or they moved on to ask someone else. Often, they try to downplay my lack of action, dropping comments like, "Guess I caught you at a busy moment,” or something similar. Yet, there's a huge twist to my story - astonishingly, I'm on a crazy successful streak.

Last year, I pocketed around a cool $300k after all the taxes. The bigwigs even granted me a hefty promotion and word on the street is, I've got another one coming my way. Believe me, I've given everything a shot: read all those self-help books, even went as far as trying hypnosis, but nothing seems to get me motivated enough. However, a curious observation: when I land on something that strikes my interest, I put in my best effort into it. Work ethic isn't my problem, it's just that the charm of my current job has lost its lustre - even though it's making me exceedingly wealthy.

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14. So Close Yet So Far

You know, I really thought I was on the track to finish college. But, out of nowhere, I experienced what felt like a week's worth of anxiety attacks, which brought me to a complete halt, especially when it came to working on my final paper. Without that complete, I technically didn't graduate. But that didn't stop me from walking across the stage in the cap and gown like I was supposed to.

For the past seven years, I've been telling people I have a degree when I actually don't. I can't say it's been easy, but it's what I’ve done.

But there's a new development - I decided to get back in touch with my college and discussed the possibility of handing in that long-overdue paper. If it works out, it means I finally get to close this chapter and move forward with a degree in hand. For now, I’m just playing the waiting game. Wish me luck! InABlink

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15. A Hairy Situation

I'm a heterosexual woman who, due to a unique situation, has to incorporate daily shaving, like most men, into her normal routine. My fear of someone detecting my facial stubble is so intense, that I refuse to let anyone touch my face. If I happen to be spending the night at a friend's house, I always keep a razor and can of shaving cream concealed in my bag. In the mornings, I wake up at an hour so early, it's practically still night, just to sneak into the bathroom and shave while everyone else is fast asleep.

Despite going through laser hair removal procedures, the results have been less than satisfactory. My facial hair is light in color, making it harder for the laser to effectively target. However, it's still dark enough to be noticeable if I forgo shaving. Trying other methods, I've yet to find an electrologist who can provide a successful, long-term solution to this persistent problem. The situation doesn't stop at my face either. I also have stomach hair that extends up to just a few inches below my chest.

In an effort to uncover the root cause, I've undergone various tests for hormonal imbalances. Interestingly, all the test results come back indicating that none exist. Medical experts suspect that I might have poly-cystic ovarian syndrome, a condition known to cause excess hair growth. But the irony is, the numerical values required to confirm this diagnosis are missing. Hence, it remains an assumption and my shaving struggle continues unabated.

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16. Taking One For The Team

I'm seriously in debt after financially assisting my partner through medical school. I found myself buying his food and everyday necessities like toiletry items using my credit card and using money from an inheritance. His family was unable to provide for him, and his student loans barely covered his rent, textbooks, and transportation, including some food. Now, it's making my life fall apart.

I'm currently saddled with $30,000 in student loans, plus ongoing car, insurance, fuel, and other bills. Although I'm currently employed, I'm far from financially stable as I have to cover the $5,000 debt on my credit card, resulting from the years I supported him. I'm doing my best to pay off my own student loans as well. Recently, I applied for a car loan of only $500, but got rejected because of the lingering credit card debt, a keen reminder of my hidden financial struggle.

On the brighter side, he's due to graduate in May. He'll soon be able to sustain himself when he begins his residency and starts receiving a paycheck.

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17. Holding It Back

When I was just a kid, I got the diagnosis of Tourette's and OCD - Obsessive Compulsive Disorder. It's a bit tough to keep count, but I reckon I've got about 500 to 1,000 unique tics or compulsive habits. When I'm out and about, or chatting with folks, I do my best to keep these tics at bay. They can spring up just from locking eyes with someone, seeing certain numbers or colors, or spotting something in the distance.

These tics can manifest physically or mentally - sometimes others spot them, and other times they're rituals I only perform in my thoughts. Despite all this, I've earned myself a master's degree and I'm quite the social butterfly. The real challenge here, apart from handling a tic or compulsive habit about every five seconds, is trying to keep them under wraps. Not because I'm shy or anything, but I'd rather blend in than have to explain my situation all the time.

Truth be told, living with constant discomfort and the inability to completely relax is rough. I wouldn't wish it on anyone. But still, I'm thankful for my general health, both physically and mentally, as well as the character I've built while navigating life with these disorders.

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18. An About Face

Many times in my life, I’ve asserted I don't want kids. I’ve always thought I'm not adept at handling children and doubted my ability to be a good mom. However, a recent revelation turned my world upside down.

Just last week during a routine check-up, the doctor told me that a hormone imbalance made me unable to have kids. The news was shocking, especially because it awakened in me the realization of how much I really do want to be a mother.

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19. The Other Woman

I'm a 20-year-old involved with a 39-year-old married man who is also a father, and it's starting to deeply trouble me. To put it simply, he tells me there's been a significant scarcity of affection in his marriage for quite some time. His wife also doesn't accompany him on his work trips, something he deeply desires. Even though divorce has been a consideration for him, he remains in his marriage because there are no major issues and he cherishes the daily contact he has with his son.

In exchange for roughly $200 a week, I do the things his wife doesn't want to do. I secretly check her Facebook daily and look at their family photos as a painful reminder of the true consequences of my actions.

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20. The Feeling Is Mutual

I have a complicated relationship with my mother; truthfully, our bond has been strained ever since I could remember. It all started when she won custody over me - a decision that I believe was influenced by the justice system's favoritism towards mothers. The initial bitterness stems mainly from the blame I attribute to her for my parents’ divorce, a fallout that was catalyzed by her repeated infidelity.

One of the instances was accidentally discovered by my father when I was a mere toddler, scarcely three years old. I'd had a nightmare and, seeking comfort, had unknowingly crawled into bed with a stranger instead of my father. The ensuing reality was far worse than any nightmare could have been.

However, the grievances don't just stop at her past indiscretions. My mother’s overbearing nature permeates every aspect of my life, from finances to my food choices. Her domineering control over what I eat has led to unhealthy eating behaviors on my part. I resort to hiding food because of the lack of freedom in my dietary choices, even down to the cream in my coffee. This harrowing scenario further unfolds when things don’t go her way; her frustrations often culminate in physical harm towards me. Unfortunately, I've always kept these emotions bottled up, and haven't confided in anyone outside of our household.

Despite my mother’s career in the military, I harbor no desire to jeopardize it. Regardless of my personal feelings towards her, I respect her dedication to her career and financial independence. These two aspects seem to be the only things she genuinely cherishes. I've always had this sense that she resents me, primarily because she believes I stole my father's affection from her.

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21. In A Lonely Place

My marriage has ended, but I'm really struggling to move on because I worry that my wife might harm herself. Roughly six months ago, she started caring for a friend of hers who seemed to be losing touch with reality. The situation was a little peculiar because this friend happened to be an ex-boyfriend. I didn't suspect she was having an affair; instead, I thought she saw him as a vulnerable child in need of protection.

In September, her ex-boyfriend went through a tragic incident that led to his death. Since then, my wife plunged into this deep, dark depression. She hasn't stayed at our house even for a night, choosing to live in the house of her deceased ex-boyfriend — a decision his family seems okay with. In the process, she's left our relationship in the rear-view mirror.

We have a darling two-year-old daughter, and despite her own struggles, she manages to care for her well enough. I generally feel okay about their time together, though I can't overlook my wife's emotional instability. A month or two after her ex passed away, she had a serious self-harm attempt and almost succeeded, landing her in the psych ward for a week. But, it didn't change much.

She's wrestling with severe depression, but she's not ready to admit it. She keeps bringing up leaving me and our daughter, who I really want to stay a part of her life. My wife's always had mental health issues due to an unstable childhood and a tough family situation. Our marriage was never perfect, but we made it work. It felt like walking on eggshells, always worried about triggering her. Yet, we also had our share of joyful moments.

Our daughter was unplanned, and that led to our rushed marriage. Looking back, I don't think it was the right move. I adore my daughter, but I can't deny that I've fallen out of love with my wife. Things have started to get even more disturbing. Her suicide attempt resulted in hefty bills that added to our financial mess — a mess she won't help me clean up.

She's totally unconcerned about our worsening financial situation, seemingly uninterested in budgeting or curbing her credit card use. Since she's stopped working, she's living off my hard-earned money without a worry in the world. Our months of separation have made our interactions somewhat cordial, as long as she's not in the clutches of her depression.

I have suggested we should get a divorce, but that sent her spiraling into another depressive episode. She feels everyone in her life ends up abandoning her. In her eyes, I'd be the next one to do so. But I feel abandoned too. I want to move forward and get a handle on my finances for my own sake and my daughter's. Yet, I fear if I do, my wife's mental state might deteriorate.

Despite everything, I care for her. I pity her. If only I could help her! Yet, I don't know when, or if, our situations will ever stabilize, and if we'll be financially stable by then. Only my closest friends and parents know about my situation. I want to share my story with others, but I worry they'll judge me for wanting to leave my wife while she's grieving and battling depression.

But how long should I keep this up? There's no clear answer. The most painful part is when she left me out in the cold, all alone in the relationship. I feel trapped in a time warp. I do what I can to treasure moments with my daughter and make the best of my situation. But without knowing what step to take next, it's an uphill battle.

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22. A Moment In Time

As a child, I overheard my father confessing on the phone that he resented me for wreaking havoc on his life. You see, my folks had me when they were just 19 and my father's show of kindness was explicit only when I excelled in sports. As time went by, I became particularly brilliant at lacrosse, attracting a scholarship offer. But it all fell apart in an instant.

During my senior year of high school, I took a nasty hit in a lacrosse match. My shoulder was severely injured, with three fractures and a torn tendon. Post-surgery complications led to a less than ideal recovery and my scholarship was pulled. This incident changed everything. I found myself distanced from my dad, deserted by my friends, and dismissed by my girlfriend. It was a rocky period and I struggled to hold myself together for several years, until I reached my wit's end.

On my 20th birthday, I found myself on the rooftop of my workplace, contemplating ending it all. But just as I was close to stepping off the edge, my phone rang. It was a friend inviting me out for a drink.

She unknowingly saved my life that day. Fear has kept me silent, as I have never summoned the courage to admit to my suicidal intention nor thank her for her life-saving call.

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23. More Than Words

Here's something that almost no one knows about me - I have a stutter. I've become very skilled at hiding it. How do I manage it? Well, there are a couple of methods.

First, I tend not to talk a lot. This obviously reduces the chance of my stutter revealing itself. Secondly, I tend to act like a living, breathing thesaurus, but for simple words. If I struggle to pronounce a certain word, I quickly think of another one or rephrase my sentence. It may sound a bit stilted, but it helps me get my message across.

And finally, I often say things like, "Oh, I can't remember the exact word..." or "Oops, I've lost my train of thought". This way, I can buy myself some time and deliberate a bit longer, making my speech sound smooth.

Whenever I find myself in a social situation, I can't help but feel incredibly nervous. I'm always worried that my stutter might give itself away, that someone might notice.

There's only ever been one person I've confided in about my stutter, a girlfriend I was with for several years. At first, she was supportive, but she left me just two weeks later. I've never shared this part of my life with anyone else since then.ThrowAway13849879

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24. Don’t Judge A Book By Its Cover

You may not see it, but I'm holding back a tsunami of heartache and stress. It's so overwhelming that almost every night, tears escape me without any warning. On the surface, I'm thriving, I'm sociable, and I'm the go-to guy for many when they need advice or help. But when the crowd disperses, and I'm left alone, I'm consumed by an unbearable solitude. To everyone else, it seems like I'm standing tall. They don't see the painful struggle beneath.

This façade I've constructed has led to an intensely painful experience. When I've attempted to let my friends see behind the curtain, they simply dismiss it as though I'm putting on some sort of dark humor act.

Lost my mom to the clutches of cancer three years ago — a fact that has since been poisoning my relationships one after the other. Like many other clandestine carriers of pain, I can readily dish out advice, but I am woefully inadequate when it comes to heeding it myself. No one knows the truth: that I weep into my pillow night after night in silent agony.

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25. Hitting The Jackpot

I've hit the jackpot – a cool $20,000,000 from the lottery. It's been two years and to my surprise, I've managed to keep it a secret from everyone – my fiancé included. I keep the money safe and sound in a savings account while I transform into an everyday Joe going to work like the rest of us.

All my close ones are curious about why I'm always in such high spirits and relaxed, regardless of difficulties in life. They often wonder what's the secret of my unfailing cheerfulness. If they only knew, right? But, then I fear they might never forgive me for keeping such a big secret from them. Oh, what a conundrum.bluegoon

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26. Late Night Mistakes

Eight months ago, I made a serious mistake — I cheated on my boyfriend. At that point, we had been together for around a year. To this day, he holds an immense place in my heart, and he's not aware of my misstep. I was drawn into a reckless interaction with an old flame, a man who in retrospect was far from perfect and who managed to reenter my life during one of my lowest points, a time when I was questioning my worth.

Being deep into self-doubt, I often found myself questioning whether I was good enough for my boyfriend, whether I was holding him back or whether he'd be happier with someone else. Unfortunately, on one of these uncertain days, I found comfort at the bottom of a glass. In that intoxicated moment, as I shared with my old flame the feelings of inadequacy clouding my mind, I ended up kissing him.

Since that incident, I've distanced myself from this man, telling him unequivocally that it was a one-time thing and it won't happen again. I also warned him if he had any regard for our past relationship, he shouldn't reveal our slip-up to anyone.

My boyfriend is the very definition of a genuine, good-hearted man — he's simply the best man I've ever met. The reasons for me keeping this from him are clear in my mind: I was the one who faltered, and I believe I should bear this heavy guilt alone rather than shattering his world with it. I'm confident it won't happen again, and believe me when I say I would give anything to undo this mistake. I've never had doubts about wanting to be with him; my worries have always been about why he'd want to be with me.

Lately, my guilt has been exceptionally overwhelming. It's puzzling because for a while, I managed to successfully bury this regretful memory in the far corners of my mind, yet now it has resurfaced with a vengeance. I can't help but think about how I wronged such an incredible person, and I'm wrestling with feelings of self-reproach.

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27. Even Strong Women Get Lonely

I'm a 21-year-old girl who's yet to have her first intimate experience. I carry a bit of extra weight and my skin isn't exactly perfect. There are times when I dream about being bold enough to bring a guy home from a bar, but, to be completely honest, I'm scared. I worry that they might find me unappealing or be turned off by my lack of experience.

What's more, I'm about to finish college and it's disheartening because I've never been in a relationship, or even had a consistent fling. It seems like nobody has ever been genuinely interested in me when we're both sober.

This situation sometimes makes me feel like a kid, something less than desirable. My friends see me as a confident, independent woman in control of her life. Their perception of me is mainly based on my attitude, as I tend to keep my insecurities to myself.

P.S. This secret is safe with me.

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28. All Dogs Go To Heaven

One freezing day when heading out for work, I decided to leave an electric blanket running for our little dogs. This blanket had an automatic cut-off feature, designed to keep pets warm when the temperature drops. I must admit, I didn't foresee the tragic fallout of this decision.

On returning home, my husband and I were greeted by an agonizing sight - our house was ablaze. Everything within the property was reduced to ashes, the devastations were overwhelming. We managed to salvage only the items that were in our truck. Our hearts sank as we realized our beloved dogs hadn't survived.

An investigation by the fire department concluded the cause of the fire to be electrical. The condition of our abode was dire, regardless—a fact we knew all too well, considering we had plans to move out within a matter of months.

Regardless of these circumstances, an overwhelming sense of guilt engulfs me. Could leaving the electric blanket on have triggered the fire? Could this decision have indirectly led to us losing our beloved pets—who were more like family to us, and everything we owned? The guilt swells whenever I brood over these thoughts. I'm invariably on the verge of breaking down when these thoughts creep in.
-firethrowaway55

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29. Momma’s Boy

Honestly, I'm 27 and still reside with my mom. Some of my pals are quick to poke fun, suggesting I'm just too old to be living under my mom's roof. But honestly, I truly enjoy this arrangement. It's not because I'm an overgrown child, incapable of fending for myself. Quite the opposite, actually! I hold a decent job, I take good care of myself, and I contribute towards the rent and bills for our shared home. Moving out and living alone just doesn't appeal to me, I am pretty content with the way things are in my current living situation.

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30. Mother Doesn’t Know Best

I carry a secret around, probably not unlike many others. My own mother has never seen me as anything more than a golden ticket. I was her meal ticket for child support until I turned 18. And apparently, my grandfather had created a “college fund” for me; somehow, I never saw a penny of that. You'd imagine that despite this, she must have spent some money on me while I was living with her. Unfortunately, that's not the truth.

My dad had to step in, even though we were stealthy about it. He gave me a secret debit card. He knew my mom was spending everything on herself, including the $1,400 check he gave her specifically to buy me a laptop; a laptop I never received. As I entered my teenage years, my grandfather tried his best to help, sending birthday and Christmas gifts in the form of $200-400 checks. My mom, though, would convince me to hand these over to her. She'd insist that she needed them and that “family always comes first”.

In case I resisted, she was ready with her weapon. She would berate me, calling me selfish, spoiled, and ungrateful. She'd insist that I was shaming my grandparents and questioned my love for her. It felt as if I was held captive in some way. She had complete control over my communication with my aunt, uncle, and grandparents, only allowing me to use her phone. She never missed an opportunity to try and create conflict between my dad and me.

She would claim that my dad was just trying to buy my love; a poorly veiled attempt at undermining her own inadequacies. The fact is, she's been jobless for years, living off a trust fund and had utilized my $100,000 college fund. Even so, my dad stepped up, covering my entire college expense, making sure I wouldn't be buried under student loans. It bothers her endlessly that everything I have is not on her dime.

This distaste comes directly from her inability to manipulate me or control me, especially as she used to, by interrupting my access to communication: cutting off my cell phone every time we disagreed while it was her paying the bills. I'd find myself without a phone connection at least twice a week during that phase. Despite her obvious lack of emotional maturity to fill her role as a mother and the clear understanding that I'm not the terrible daughter she alleges I am, I often battle guilt and confusion.

All I can express immense gratitude for is my extraordinarily supportive dad and stepmother. These two amazing humans have stepped up, filling the void in my life that my biological mother left. The sincere maternal love and concern I feel from my stepmother, who's only known me for nine years, make me wish my real mother could feel the same way about me. But instead, she's succumbed to addiction, which now adds a constant layer of fear in my life.

Have to admit, airing that out feels like a weight lifted.

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31. The Animal Inside

Every day, I grapple with overwhelming feelings of frustration toward the people in my life. It often feels like a monumental task to keep myself from lashing out at them for a multitude of reasons. My restraint mostly relies on minor appeasement and dampening my feelings of bitterness. Yet, beneath the surface, it's terrifying.

Even as I battle these feelings, I suppress the desire to lash out and cause significant harm to these people. Currently, I am seeking help from a psychiatrist, but a part of me is so well-versed in identifying my own issues that I am able to conceal them from the trained eye. Instead, I simplistically label my struggles as "social anxiety" in our face-to-face sessions, often without giving it a second thought.

I often hesitate to fully express the depth of my feelings due to a fear of inconveniencing myself, stepping back from the potential benefits of this raw honesty. While I acknowledge that my thoughts and feelings may not reflect typical emotions, there’s a part of me that takes a perverse sense of enjoyment in harboring negative thoughts about the people around me. I relish the idea of them suffering consequences for their failings and ignorance.

At the same time, I fear the social stigma and judgment that would follow if I were to be open about my thoughts and perceived as unhinged by those I interact with regularly. This fear adds an extra layer of complexity to my life. Even my sleep is disturbed by these prevailing thoughts. At night, lying in bed, I can't help but wonder if my feelings mirror those of individuals who later act on such disturbing thoughts. This fear gnaws away at me, making me question whether my breaking point is an issue of 'when' rather than 'why'.

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32. Leave Me Alone

I grew up in the heart of the Bible Belt, an area known for its strong religious beliefs and closely-knit families. My dad took off when I was just 4, and a short while ago I heard that he had succumbed to addiction while living in Colorado. When I was 14, my mother passed away from a rare condition called sarcoidosis. Since then, I've been residing with my grandparents.

Some time after my mom died, I took a leap of faith and proclaimed myself as an atheist. Even though it took me half a year to gather the courage to confide in my grandparents about my disbelief in God, their reaction wasn't as accepting as they made me believe. Despite them stating it didn't cause them distress, their attitudes and behavior towards me changed drastically ever since. They still pressure me to participate in church activities and consistently reprimand me whenever others discover about my atheism. Almost all of my extended family members behave similarly. The only exception is my uncle from Tennessee. He truly represents the meaning of family, treating me with the same love and respect as before.

I have a tremendous secret that no one in my family knows about—I am planning to sever all ties with them the moment I graduate from college and leave the country. In the conservative society I live in, such an action is deemed to be just as sinful as betraying God. I've always been more of a loner, valuing a few close friendships over scores of casual acquaintances. Any friends beyond this small circle usually fade away within a few years, sometimes even months.

My dream is to lead a simple life with as few obligations as possible. It's my hope that if I ever get married, my wife will either have a small family or at the very least, will not force me to get tangled in her familial ties. Even the thought of one day becoming a grandfather does not appeal to me. I would be perfectly content living with just my partner and a handful of friends. But life isn't a bed of roses. We live in a cold world where people are ever ready to interfere for their own benefits.

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33. Between A Rock And A Hard Place

When I was just a young man, starting out in life, I found out I was going to be a father. Don't get me wrong, I love my son passionately. I've adored him since the day he was born, and I always will. But sometimes, deep down, I find myself wishing that his arrival had come at a later stage of my life. Swapping your dreams and ambitions for diapers and parent-teacher meetings when you're hardly more than a child yourself is a strange kind of sorrow.

Moreover, the situation was worsened by the actions of my child's mother. She used the child as a way of controlling me - threatening that I would have to pay child support or even worse, that she would just leave with our baby. And her hypocrisy was blatant. She was dating another man while expecting me to stay single.

However, despite all the unease and obstacles, my unconditional love for our son remained constant and unwavering. I hope for a better future, where we can live our lives harmoniously and our son can enjoy his life fully. Be strong, son, and know that even though your early arrival came with difficulties, it has never, for even a second, made me love you any less.

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34. Something Isn’t Right

I have a secret and it scares me to acknowledge it. The fact of the matter is, I have cancer and as far as anyone knows, it's just me who's aware of it. It’s almost as if I can’t fully understand it myself sometimes. I'm pretty certain it has spread to other areas of my body. This fear of acceptance or acknowledgment takes me back to the five stages of loss and grief. I'm caught, it seems, in this looping phase of denial. I can feel the palpitations of anxiety each time I sit down to write about this.

Despite my relatively young age, in my 20s, I've been grappling with this for years. It initially appeared when I was 13, what seemed like a troubling growth in my pelvic area. It’s still with me, just that now it has moved closer to my scrotum, grown, and confirmed itself to be a tumor. It's about the size of a golf ball now. Despite having had multiple medical check-ups over the years, no doctor has ever mentioned it, and for reasons unknown, I have never brought it up either.

The idea of seeing an oncologist has crossed my mind many times. But how do I start this conversation with a doctor? "Hi, I believe I have cancer but I'm not entirely certain. Oh, and by the way, I’ve been silently dealing with it for over a decade now"?

What terrifies me isn’t the thought of death per se, it's the possibility of leaving those I love behind. I have a good job, a house to my name, and insurance coverage, but I always find myself thinking of countless reasons why I shouldn't go to the doctor.

The "what ifs" keep me away: Will the cost of the treatment drain my finances and make me an unwanted load to others? Will I need to have multiple organs taken out? Will I live through this? Sometimes, a part of me hopes that it's something that will just resolve on its own, as ludicrous as that may sound.

There are moments when I wish everything could just end. Maybe through an aneurysm, perhaps. But then there are times when I consider a different outcome. A scenario where I finally face my fears, speak to a doctor, go through the required treatment, and go on to live a relatively normal life. This is my story, this is my secret.

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35. It Takes Four

I've got a deep, longtime affection for my best friend's wife. Everyone's aware I've always had a soft spot for her, but it's more than just a little crush in my mind, and it has been for years. I first met her the same day he did, on their blind date over ten years ago. He's a wonderful guy, and they're happily married.

I would never dream of interfering with their relationship. And here's an even tougher part: I'm also married and adore my wife immensely. Grappling with this in a culture that values monogamy so highly only makes it all more confusing. I'm committed to not jeopardizing their relationship or mine.

I choose to be a good friend to both of them. Not just because of my feelings for her, but out of genuine respect for him as well.

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36. Nothing Sweet Or Little About These Lies

When I was 17, I fell into a relationship with a man who was nine years older than me. My parents knew about him and didn't raise any objections which gave me confidence in our relationship. Everything was sailing smoothly until we were six months into it. That's when I began to feel something was amiss.

I took to the internet to try and unravel my suspicions, and what I discovered left me flabbergasted to say the least. Thanks to my local county auditor's website, I stumbled upon a fact that shattered me. He was married. Not just that, he was a father to a six-year-old daughter. I couldn't believe what I was reading. My heart felt like it was being crushed under a ton of bricks.

Unknowingly, at the tender age of 17, I became 'the other woman'. An era of lies had unfolded under my very nose and I was none the wiser. Needless to say, it destroyed a part of me. Trusting men became an uphill task. Every time I considered giving someone a chance, these unpleasant memories would flood back making me second guess their intentions. The constant paranoia of hidden motives became my new normal.

Sadly, I continued my friendship with him despite the bitter revelations. Even in present times, we stay in touch. To add salt to my wounds, he now has a girlfriend over and above his marital commitment.

Hearing this struck a raw nerve. It's not an exaggeration to say that I was deeply in love with him. It doesn't help that the men I attempted to date post this disaster, kept up the unfortunate tradition of lying. This chain of traumatic experiences made me extremely private about this part of my life. Only a handful of my close friends are aware of what transpired.

The fear of being judged prevents me from opening up about this to any potential partners. I worry they might misconstrue me for a homewrecker when the painful reality is, I was as oblivious as anyone could be about his marital status while we were together.

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37. What He Doesn’t Know Might Hurt Him

My dad, who I very much adore, might not be my biological parent. He's not even aware of this truth. Now, I am into my mid-thirties, and I have decided to keep this information to myself because I simply don't want him to get hurt knowing that I am not his biological child. There is another reason for my silence - every time I think about sharing this secret with my dad, my mom makes veiled threats to stop me from doing so. Now, that's something I want to avoid completely.

The fact is, not even a single friend or family member is aware of this reality. My biological father, surprisingly, is keen to establish a relationship with me. However, I find myself unwilling to reciprocate his feelings or desires.

My mom, on the other hand, appears upset with my decision to not communicate with my biological father. Her reasoning? She believes that I should pursue a connection with him because he's financially well off.

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38. Switched At Birth

I've got a remarkable family secret I'd like to share. It's about my grandmother, but it isn't your usual grandmother's tale. You see, she was adopted - or you could say, taken in - under pretty unusual circumstances. This story goes back to somewhere around the 1930s or 40s.

To provide a little context, during those times, whenever a woman gave birth in a hospital, regardless of the baby's survival, she was placed in the same ward as other new mothers. Now, this isn't the typical adoption tale you've probably heard about where a baby is orphaned and finds a new family.

Here's where it gets a little complicated. My great-grandmother was one of those mothers in that shared ward, but gloom had enveloped her life as she had just miscarried her child. As fate would have it, right next to her bed was another lady who had a different problem. She just gave birth to a healthy baby, but she didn't want, or maybe wasn't ready, to be a mother.

In her despair, she asked the hospital staff to "get rid of it", presumably hoping they would find the baby a new home. "Get rid of it!"- can you imagine that kind of thing happening today?

And then, a strange, yet beautiful, course of events unfolded. Without any official proceedings or paperwork, the hospital handed the baby over to my grieving great-grandmother. You had one woman mourning the loss of her baby and another panicking about becoming a mother - a real-life drama unfolding in that ward.

Then, someone had a lightbulb moment. They thought, "Two women, two problems, one solution!" Isn't it fascinating how they solved this complex issue so simply? Life was different back then, this wouldn't fly by today's legal and social standards but back then, it seemed like the perfect solution.

Sounds crazy, doesn't it? However, this makeshift adoption was a blessing in disguise. After all these years, as far as I'm informed, they all managed to live a happy and content life.

This story is like a hidden, unique gem in my family's history box, one that reveals life's unpredictable turns and twists, telling a story of sadness, hope, happiness and the kindness of strangers. And that, my friends, is the secret tale of my adopted grandma.

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39. What A Tangled Web We Weave

My maternal grandparents had rather unconventional lives, all four of them. Here's the tale: After giving birth to my mom, my grandma and grandpa decided not to continue their journey together. So, they parted ways in life. Remarkably, they both found love in another couple - kind of like merging two different marriages.
It's an unusual story, isn't it?

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40. The Ties That Bind

There's something I've kept under wraps for a while; in the eyes of the law, I'm still married. It's been four long years since he and I last locked eyes. Although we're living apart, splurging on a divorce hasn't been in either of our budgets, so we're technically still hitched. Not a huge deal, right? Well, here's where it gets a bit messy.

I backed off from telling people about it. Petrified, maybe. Didn't feel like explaining it over and over. Dating got tricky, too. The last couple of people I've been with, they were left in the dark. The truth is, the only people in the know about this are my close family members. My circle of friends, acquaintances - they're all oblivious.

This little secret of mine? Only known by my family. Friends? None the wiser. And the women I've been involved with? They were completely out of the loop.

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41. Keep This Between Us

My great-aunt had a shocking secret that was unknown to anyone in our family. She relocated to the west coast citing 'work reasons' when she discovered she was pregnant. She stayed there long enough to bring her child into the world, recover from the birth, and ultimately, have the baby adopted. Interestingly enough, she was clueless about the identity of the father. It was the 1950s, and such situations were not highly regarded during that era.

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42. Too Close To The Bone

I've noticed that it's quite easy for me to become fixated on things. This could be about people, issues I'm facing, or just about anything, really. This is especially true when it comes to ending relationships. Regardless of how insignificant they may have seemed at the end, it's usually pretty tough for me to let go.

Moreover, this problem is not limited to just romantic relationships. I tend to also become overly attached to my friends. I find myself wanting their company too much or just constantly wanting to talk to them. Unfortunately, this obsession tends to lead to a lot of my friendships ending. This habit has turned into a hurdle in my life and as much as I'm aware of it, it seems tough for me to change.

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43. Childhood: Ruined

When I was four, my aunt and grandma took me away without my parents' permission. I only have a dim memory of spending about a year with them before my parents were able to bring me back. They didn’t mistreat me, but to conceal my identity, they shaved my head and told everyone I was a boy, even though I'm a girl. They also claimed I was two years old, not four.

The vague memory I hold onto is feeling angry about losing my hair and being really upset about having to wear pull-ups.

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44. Gotta Get Out

I don't want to live with my folks anymore. I'm at the age of 27 and financially stable, meaning I could afford to live on my own anytime. However, my parents have both sustained life-long disabilities. On top of the rent I pay them, I also cover the majority of the household expenses. At the moment, they're tied up in a legal battle with the bank to retain ownership of their house. If I decide to relocate, I fear it would destabilize their situation, leading to a loss of their home and forcing them to move.

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45. The REAL Black Sheep Of The Family

My elder cousin played a role in his long-time girlfriend's suicide, a reality that still troubles me. While the older folks in our family try to keep it hushed, us younger ones are well aware of his past. They were a couple for 15 years, and he was fully aware of her mental health struggles. However, he failed to handle her situation with sensitivity and kindness, and instead, often treated her poorly both emotionally and mentally.

Internally, he caused her great suffering, through actions like infidelity. He would brazenly cheat on her, sometimes getting caught on purpose, just to indicate that she was dispensable to him. He further complicated their relationship by getting her employed with his former fiancée, which sparked distress in both their personal and professional lives. He ruthlessly judged her appearances, criticizing her choice of clothing and body shape.

When he felt dissatisfied with her after her exhausting 60-hour work weeks as a nurse, he would tell her that he was leaving for the weekend and he didn't want to hear from her. He added salt to her wounds by frivolously showcasing his fun-filled weekends with random women on social media platforms.

Despite everything, she kept going back to him, often lured by his manipulative actions disguised as acts of love. Eventually, she reached a point of total despair. Her lifelong desire was to start a family. He promised her a few years earlier that they would marry and have children. But when she reminded him of this promise, he refused, stating he didn't want a child to hinder his fun-loving lifestyle. Moreover, since they were already in a common-law marriage, he argued that formalizing it was pointless.

As a result, she suffered a severe emotional breakdown, airing their private issues on Facebook and making bizarre phone calls to random people in the dead of night. Her mental state worsened, reflecting in her odd habit of relocating furniture in their shared apartments, like moving the TV into the bathroom or the couch into the kitchen.

Eventually, she agreed to move in with her uncle for a while, hoping that he could take care of her. But it ended it utter tragedy: She took her her own life. One evening, she simply said she was going to bed and ingested half a bottle of sleeping pills. She didn't wake up.

My siblings and I were naturally curious about my cousin's reaction to the loss. However, his strange and detached response was disturbing. Despite having spent more than a decade with her, all he could say was, "I don't know. I haven't seen her in a month. I guess her mind got the best of her. I'll miss her, but I'm alright".

We found this very unsettling and decided to dig deeper into the situation. Where I stand today, I've lost all touch with this cousin. I avoid any gatherings I know he’ll attend. Meanwhile, my sister has taken it upon herself to ensure that history doesn't repeat itself. She often checks up on my cousin's new girlfriend, frequently connecting with her on Facebook to make sure she's not emotionally distraught due to my cousin's actions.

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46. A Black Spot

I don't really recall anything about my former partner. My memories seem to start fresh from June 2012 and they're sort of scattered and out of sequence. Only my best friend is in the know about this. I've tried to piece together the timeline by going through our social media accounts and talking to close friends to put together the sequence of events. Despite all this, for years, I've felt almost normal. There have been a few vague suggestions and pieces of evidence, but nothing strong enough to really convince me.

I'm hesitant to contact my ex directly. I'm worried that these "memories" I seem to have are false and my mind is playing tricks on me. I'm aware I could really use some professional help to get through this, but I just don't have the funds right now.

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47. Baring It All

I can't bring myself to sleep with my girlfriend until we're married. She presumes this stems from a deep-seated religious belief...it doesn't. I always find an excuse to avoid church every Sunday. The genuine reason behind this decision will be devastating. The truth is, my private parts were severely damaged in an accident when I was a kid, leaving me with only about half an inch of it. I've been grappling with how to break this to her.

I'm head over heels in love and I dread the moment this truth surfaces. For over a year and a half, we've been together and she surprisingly honors my decision to refrain from physical intimacy, apart from kisses, until after we are hitched.

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48. Everything All At Once

In the middle of December, a thrilling opportunity came my way. I was recruited to work in my dream role at a company I've always desired to be a part of. With this, I packed my bags and shifted to the capital city while setting a plan in motion with my university to finish my degree simultaneously.

However, there's a significant detail I haven't shared with anyone — I have been diagnosed with early-stage cancer. I got to know this unpleasant news before I accepted the job but chose to remain silent about it.

Postponing my treatment has been unwise on my part, but the reason lies with the fact that my wonderful first job involved a demanding training phase at the Chamber of Commerce, leaving me with little time for anything else. I admit this isn't a good justification when dealing with a health issue as serious as cancer, but I intend to address it now that I've found my footing at work. My diagnosis is cervical cancer, but I'm uncertain whether or not it has spread to other parts of my uterus.

Thankfully, the cancer was detected in its early stages, so the most optimistic outcome is that it could be removed surgically, which would help me evade the hardship of chemo and radiation treatments. I'll know more about this soon.

Interestingly, the prospect of losing my fertility doesn't upset me much—when your life is under threat, your views on other matters tend to change.

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49. Know-It-All

It's really painful, but my husband is being unfaithful. I've caught on to his affair, but confronting him about it feels too risky and nerve-wrecking. He's so wrapped up in his own world that he never acknowledges any mistake he might make. We are raising a nine-year-old together, and I worry about the impact this might have on our child. Growing up, I saw my mother marry and divorce seven times, and I carry the fear of repeating her pattern with me. It might seem irrational, but that's what's holding me back from breaking up the marriage.

Financially, I’m well off and can comfortably manage on my own. I have undeniable proof of his cheating, but I'm yet to approach him about it. Based on past experiences, I know he would deny it outright just like he does whenever I challenge him in an argument.

In all seriousness though.

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50. The Butterfly Effect

When I was younger, there was a boy in my school who constantly bullied me. From pushing me down stairs to hitting me with a baseball bat, he made sure my life was anything but comfortable. He even once defaced my brand new NFL coat that I had happily received as a Christmas gift. His actions were despicable but no one dared to stand up against him.

The reason was simple: his father was the school's head pastor and the principal of our private religious school. The authorities of the school made my parents believe that I was a troubled child, self-harming and causing troubles, none of which were true. But when every adult you trust starts to imply that something's wrong with you, it gets hard to convince them otherwise.

Eventually, my parents transferred me to a different school for reasons not involving the bully. That's when my life started to turn around. I started doing well academically, made a lot of friends, and, for once, my body was free from the pain of injuries. However, this pleasant phase was cut short when my tormentor ended up at my new school after the old one shut down. He wasted no time in reminding me of his intentions to resume his tormenting ways.

Our encounter coincided with the school's decision to introduce a dog for locker checks. My friend, who possessed something illegal, was particularly nervous about this. Seeing his anxiety sparked an devious idea in my head - an idea that would serve as the perfect revenge on my tormentor. I sneakily placed my friend's illegal stash in the bully's bag and waited for the results. I acted swiftly and within minutes everything fell into place. The bully was caught, detained, and expelled. After that, I didn’t see him for a long time.

Later, I learned about a series of unfortunate events that had befallen him. After being expelled, he was sent to a boarding school where he developed a severe infection in a minor cut which led to the amputation of his leg. His father tragically died in a car accident while on his way to visit him in the hospital. His sister, who happened to date a friend of mine, shared that he was still grappling with the repercussions of losing his leg and his father. She suspected that his guilt over causing such pain to their father was worsened his struggling health condition.

Despite the constant pain that he lives with every day, he refuses to use crutches or a prosthetic. Rather, he chooses to confine himself to a wheelchair. After losing his father, he also seems to have become more engrossed in his religious beliefs. As things stand, he serves as the vice-principal of a different private school in the area. His sister shared that she doesn’t maintain close contact with him anymore, as he has continued his disagreeable and unpleasant attitude, even after all the hardships he has faced.

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Do you question the accuracy of a fact you just read? At Factinate, we’re dedicated to getting things right. Our credibility is the turbo-charged engine of our success. We want our readers to trust us. Our editors are instructed to fact check thoroughly, including finding at least three references for each fact. However, despite our best efforts, we sometimes miss the mark. When we do, we depend on our loyal, helpful readers to point out how we can do better. Please let us know if a fact we’ve published is inaccurate (or even if you just suspect it’s inaccurate) by reaching out to us at contribute@factinate.com. Thanks for your help!


Warmest regards,



The Factinate team




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