Hospitality workers are no stranger to horrible patrons and customer service debacles of epic proportion. They are the warriors that smile through their teeth in the face of humanity’s worst. These Redditors have catered to bridezillas and battled with hoards of Karens…And? They’ve lived to tell the tale. Buckle up, because these hospitality horror stories are unbelievable.
1. Mistaken Identity
On my day off, I scheduled a lunch date with a guy from school, but traffic was brutal so he was running late. I was sitting at my table, looking at the menu. Note: It wasn’t the restaurant I work at, it wasn’t the same kind of food as the restaurant I work at, and it is geographically nowhere near the restaurant I work at. A woman came up and took my menu out of my hands.
“Why are you just sitting here? We’ve been waiting for service for 45 minutes.” No, they hadn’t. They came in the same time I did, 10 minutes ago, and they had already gotten drinks. “Ma’am, I don’t work here.” I didn’t recognize her at this point. “Don’t lie to me, you’re a waitress, you served me just last week, don’t you remember?”
I vaguely remember her coming into my restaurant now because she complained her meal wasn’t served with hot sauce then sent it back because it was too spicy. I tell her, “I am a waitress at local Mexican restaurant but I am not a waitress at ‘local burger bar.’” She says, “Same difference. You’re a waitress. Get a pen and paper and take down our orders.”
“I am a waitress, but not here. I’m just trying to enjoy my lunch like you are. I am not employed here in any capacity.” To which she replies, “But you’re a trained waitress and this place is clearly running behind. Don’t you people take an oath or something?” Well, this lady asked for it. I rarely get to stand up to this kind of stupidity in my role as a server, because 99.9% of the time it happens while I’m actually at work.
So I went over to their table with a pen and paper from my backpack. I wrote down all their orders. I said it would be 45 minutes and to just sit tight. I even brought over ketchup they asked for (just grabbed off another table) then…….I left. I texted my date to meet me at a place a few blocks over. The next day, the lady had called my boss at my actual restaurant, as well as totally unleashed on the manager at the restaurant I was dining at.
I felt bad when I realized the tough spot I’d left the people who actually work there in, so I went back the next day to apologize and follow up on the aftermath. Thankfully, they were chill and we had a great laugh over it. They were like, “We were so confused because she described the server with explicit details but no one remotely like that works here so we thought she’d lost her mind.”
My boss knew who I was from her description and told them he takes this very seriously and asked what day this occurred. Then when they told him he said, “You must be mistaken, because that’s that server’s day off, and she wasn’t here.” After some irate yelling and screaming at my very friendly manager about how I still need to “represent the restaurant wherever I go,” she gave up.
Now to just cross my fingers she doesn’t come by my actual restaurant!
2. Dog Gone Good Steak
I was working at a high-end ski resort that had a hotel dog (think Alpine dog that people can pet, kids can get woken up by him in the morning, he plays on the ski slopes, etc). My buddy and I worked during the ski day and cleaned up into the evening so it was just him and I finishing up in our department at the time. Our job site was right near the dog’s kennel.
One day we both saw that the dog was about to escape and we could have stopped it…but we just wanted to watch the world burn. Well, he escaped his pen, made straight for the high-end restaurant, and went hog wild. He jumped on a few tables and scarfed $100 steaks like they were M&Ms. It was the greatest day of work there by far.
3. Her Own Worst Enemy
I work as a wedding server. As soon as someone says “Bridezilla.” I think of this one story where the manager of our hotel had to shut down the wedding halfway through. This was the Bridezilla of all the Bridezillas I’ve ever seen. There were a lot of little things leading up that were casual Bridezilla—until the wedding took a dark turn.
At one point, she accused the wedding server staff of taking her veil…then the manager found it in her room and also showed her the card swipes to her room proving only she had been in the room that day. About 20 minutes later, she was screaming at some poor front desk employee accusing her of taking her wedding boots.
The manager intervened again, and after a long talk the photographer told them he had a photo of the boots on the staircase of the church, and asked if she had worn them since…When she said no, she told our place it was our job to have picked them up and made sure she had them, even though the church was not related to our place at all.
THEN shortly after she started opening the wedding gifts frantically inside the ballroom and screaming at anyone and everyone, guests included, saying someone took her wedding certificate. After that, our manager gathered the wedding staff and told us to take off our uniform jackets, empty them in front of him, then to clock out and go home.
Which we all did. None of us took anything. We heard next day that the maid of honor had the certificate and after we left the wedding was shut down completely.
4. One Bad Date
I’m a full-time student getting my PhD at age 30 and I work full time as a server. I’ve been working at this Greek bistro for the greatest people for almost 15 years now. I started bussing at almost 16 and I’m now a manager. So a few months ago, it’s around six, and one of our regulars—I’ll call him Andy—comes into the store.
Andy works at a mattress store and always comes in for lunch. He’s an awesome guy, and he’s a big guy at close to 400 pounds. Anyway, Andy shows up after work with a woman. She’s maybe a good 10 or so years older than him, but it’s obvious they’re on a date. So we make a fuss over him. The owner’s wife gets him our best table and we bring them a complimentary glass of champagne.
He orders our platter of meat and she orders a vegetarian platter. They are eating, and suddenly I hear her gasp. Andy’s face is blue and his hands are over his throat. I go over and I give him the Heimlich while the owner calls 9-1-1. I’m giving him back blows when his date whacks me with her purse. “You’re hurting him, I took first aid and that’s not right!!”
She’s screaming in my face. He’s still choking, so the owner pulls her away from me and she’s screaming still. Andy’s piece of steak goes flying, and he’s then able to breathe. By now, the paramedics are there and—get this—his date is telling them I hurt him. On the contrary, the paramedics told her that I saved his life.
Anyway, they end up taking Andy in because he was wheezing a bit. She throws me a dirty look and follows them out. Two days later, Andy comes in for lunch with his co-worker and thanks me over and over. Then he tells me that was the first and last date with that woman. He brought his newest girlfriend in yesterday. She loved the restaurant and best of all, she’s nice.
5. Cruiser Cruises On Cruise
A married couple—both had rings on so I just assumed husband and wife—were regulars at the hotel where I worked. They were nice chatty folk and I booked them on some day trips, sunset dinner cruises—mostly couple/romance geared packages. Since ID wasn’t required for both to make the bookings, they never corrected me when I booked the itineraries in both names but with his surname (since he paid with his card, I had his full name.)
So cut to a few months later, this same married man checks in but with a different woman. That’s when I made a chilling realization. It turns out this is his wife and they are there to celebrate the end of her chemo round. She sneaks downstairs and comes to my desk to book a cruise for her and her husband—the same cruise this guy went on with his mistress. I had to really hold back on telling her what was going on.
She wouldn’t stop talking about how this getaway was her thank you gift to her husband who has been so amazing and supportive during this time. Thinking about it, I still feel like the worst human being that chose my job—breach of privacy is instant dismissal—over telling her the truth. At least she’d know her husband was a scuzzbag.
6. Stay Safe
I was at the front desk when I got a call from one of my regular guests. He’s a sweet guy and I’ve never heard him complain about a single thing. He’s also a businessman, so he enjoys our low-cost, low amenity hotel. Guest: “Yeah, there’s a woman screaming near my room—it sounds like she’s really in distress.” Me: “NO PROBLEM! I’ll check it out!”
I raced down the corridor towards the fire exit. His room was situated as far away from the other guests as possible, so I knew it had to be someone using the fire exit system. I burst through the door and saw a strange, disturbing sight. A very large man was pulling a small woman by the elbows up the stairs.
Me: “What’s going on here? Sir, this is a fire exit.” Big Guy: “Sorry, it’s all good here.” Small woman: “I don’t know where I am, where are my friends? The woman was extremely intoxicated. She couldn’t stand up straight. The moment she started speaking, the guy let go of her. She kept repeating herself and stumbling up and down the stairs.”
Big Guy: “Go with him, he’s trying to help you, he works here.” He then quickly disappeared up the stairs. She kept shouting that she didn’t know where she was or who we were. She was staring off in random directions and I had to grab her arm to lead her back to the lobby. She was completely out of it.
Me: “Do you have a hotel room?” Small woman: “No, no. “There were multiple attempts to try and get some information from her. I sat her down in the lobby and asked if I could call anyone for her. She fell off the chair. I tried to give her water, but she just dropped it. Clearly, this woman’s drink had been spiked. I mean, she was completely incoherent in a strange way.
So I called for an officer to assist and he was able to find the whereabouts of where she was staying. Her story never developed past that, thank goodness…but I did see the big guy who tried to lead her upstairs after a good few hours. Me: “So, was that your friend…or?” Big Guy: “No man, I just found her like that outside one of the clubs”
Me: “So you tried to take her to your hotel room?” He just shrugged and smiled. My blood went cold. The worst part is, we had two more incidents just like this happen in the span of two weeks, with the manager being responsible for stopping the other two.
For what it’s worth, I told the officer everything I saw; though, he never made a follow-up call with me. I would hope that this was due to the officer taking the proper course of action; that is, getting her medical attention and speaking to her once she was of sound mind. I could’ve done more definitely, but I’m confident I did all I could do under the circumstances. It was quite a situation to be in and I was definitely not thinking clearly. I did send a report to corporate and my manager and heard nothing further.
7. Top Class, But Dirty Glass
If I were you, I would never trust the water glasses in hotel rooms—even five star hotel rooms. Guest room attendants are so stretched thin on time these days. There’s no time to go get a clean glass for every room. So, they’ll clean the glasses with the same rags they clean the bathroom. After all, their goal is to make the room look clean.
I worked as a Guest Room Attendant in a five-diamond hotel for years and there was over a year period that went by where we didn’t get a clean glass delivery. We didn’t have dishwashers in the room, so management was complicit. This was in a five-diamond, one of the top resorts in the world. Never trust glass in hotel rooms.
8. Power Couple
Bartender here. This girl walks into my bar and I walk over as usual place a napkin in front of her. Then I ask her, “Hey! How are you? What can I get you today?” “Cosmo,” she says. “Alright coming right up—that’s a really cool dress, by the way,” I say. It was like one of those expensive skin-tight Kim Kardashian dresses.
It also had these metal panels going through it that lit up when she moved—I don’t know, it was cool so I just mentioned it. It was a very quick off-the-cuff comment. Not hitting on her or anything. Her response chilled me to the bone. She then gives me this “ew” look and goes, “One. I have a boyfriend. Two. I don’t date gay men. Three, hurry up with my drink before I decide you don’t get to work here.”
I suddenly stop, slightly shocked. A flood of thoughts quickly go through my head. Like was she joking…? Would someone think that was humorous? Nope. Witch was SO serious. My Turn: “In what universe do you think you can walk into a bar—insult the bartender—and actually expect him to make you drinks???? Silence. “Nah witch, you’re dismissed.” But it wasn’t over.
This girl comes back the next day with her boyfriend and she points at me as if saying “that’s him.” He goes, “Yo, I heard you insulted my girl. Do you know what happens when guys talk like that to my girl?” Ugh, here we go with one of those jerk guys who wants to put on a macho performance for his girl. These specimens are the dumbest of the dumb.
I go, “Do you know what actually happened?” He goes, “I don’t care what happened! You disrespected my girl.” At this point, he actually jumped over the bar and I jumped over the bar as well to HIS side. Then this guy jumped BACK over the bar to the guests’ side, at which point one of the bouncers tackled his dumb butt to the ground.
If my girlfriend acted like that to a bartender and they got mad, I’d be like “Yeah—that was a rude thing to say.” God, I hope those two don’t procreate.
9. Bloody Elevator
One hotel I worked at hosted a Christmas party for an investment firm. During the party, two guys started jockeying for the affections of a female co-worker. Somehow, the three of them wound up on an elevator together and the guys started fighting. The elevator automatically went into safety lock down, so we had to call in the Fire Department.
When we finally got the doors opened, what we saw was a real mess. There was blood everywhere. One guy went in a squad car, and the other guy, who had worse injuries, had to go in an ambulance. And the woman? Well, we had to give the woman some clothes from lost & found because her dress was covered in blood. To make matters worse, the elevator was out of service for six hours in order to let maintenance clean it up.
There’s always a ton of back of house drama, too. Especially among the execs and the junior managers. Affairs, backstabbing, some illicit activity. You know, the usual.
10. Bad Vibes
I work at an upscale restaurant. We have two floors, and last night I was serving upstairs. We only have hosts downstairs. When we are on a wait, the hosts will see when there are open tables upstairs, page the guests and send them up. A server then greets them, sees where the host had pre-planned for them in our system, and we seat them.
Now that you know how that works, I’ll also just add in here that I am one of the top servers in my restaurant, consistently selling the most every week, and I’m a trainer. So my managers all love and appreciate me and mostly have my back. Okay, so the Karen family, is paged that their table is ready. They walk upstairs and stand by the host stand while I finish at my table and make my way over to them.
I said, “Hey guys, how’s it going” They just stared at me. Finally, the wife goes, “Do we just seat ourselves?” I, holding a paper cocktail menu and silverware, after walking over to them and feeling like I had made it clear I was about to seat them, said, “Nope that’s my job! You guys can follow me this way.” They follow to the table for six and they all take their seats.
I slide the silverware I was holding down to everyone individually instead of just setting six silverware on the end of the table for them to hand out. I said, “Our menu is all virtual, and there is a link on your table. I’ll be right back!” I come back and ask if they have any questions or if they’d like to get some drinks started. Again, silence.
I just pick someone and say, “Okay, can I grab you something to drink sir?” We don’t have what he asks for, but I suggest something similar and he says okay. The wife asks what we have on tap. I said, “We have a lot, what do you like to drink?” She said “I don’t know, that’s why I’m asking YOU.” I say, “Alright, we have 27 kinds on draft plus 19 that are bottles, so if you tell me what you’re usually into, I can guide you through what will work for you.”
She goes “Jesus Christ, I’ll just have a Bud Light since you can’t sell a drink.” I, looking stunned, laugh and say okay. Her husband then turns his attention to me and says, “Are you having a bad night?” To which I say, “No sir, are you?” and he said, “No, we are just trying to have a nice family night and you’re rude. You’ve been rude the whole time and you threw our silverware at us.”
I’m stunned so I just say, “I definitely did not throw it at you guys I was trying to slide it down the table for all of you, sorry if it came off that way. I’m not having a bad night and I haven’t had an attitude.” The wife jumps in and says, “It all started up front when you said, ‘THAT’S MY JOB’ (she changes the entire tone I said this in, of course) and now you’ve just been rude to all of us this whole experience.”
For what it’s worth, we’re like five minutes in from them walking up the stairs at this point. Then she yells, so loudly that all my other co-workers hear, “YOUR AURA IS UGLY AND WE DONT APPRECIATE THAT, JUST SEND US A NEW SERVER.” It took everything I had, like I mean, everything, not to say anything rude back to her.
I just said, “I’m happy to grab you a new server, and I’ll just grab my manager for you too while I’m at it.” My manager goes over, knowing everything from my side already, and they tell him I was rude by seating them and making that comment about how they could not seat themselves, when “there was no host at the stand so we just assumed it was pick your own table.”
They also mention throwing their silverware, and “my attitude and aura are just plain ugly.” My manager stuck up for me and said I’m actually one of their best, but they still insisted on another server. Imagine being one of the three other servers having already heard and seen this go down, and now it’s your table. That server made $3 on $80, by the way.
Screw you guys, my aura is shiny.
11. No Top, No Service
I previously worked in room service at a historic downtown hotel in a metropolitan city. During my time there, the general manager announced his retirement and the corporate overlords sent in an interim general manager from out of state. Since he didn’t own a home here, they allowed him and his wife to stay in the hotel under the premise that he would shortly take over the role and purchase a home.
His wife was either retired or out of work for his opportunity, so she spent a lot of time in the hotel—mainly at the bar. She would run up a large tab and stumble to bed several nights a week. But then it escalated. On more than one occasion she was found, by staff outside of their room, butt naked. One time, she was headed toward the lobby with no top on.
It became such a problem and embarrassment for the GM that they moved from the hotel earlier than planned. So I guess in this case the management didn’t want people to know about his wife.
12. Internship Danger
This company used to send interns for training at our hotel. Not that crazy, right? Well, it made me uncomfortable—for one seriously disturbing reason. If the company’s founder was in town, he would always try to get keys to one of the girl’s rooms. He would say it’s because “they’re really my rooms.” No, sir. Absolutely not. He tried every time.
We would have to staff an additional night audit to be stationed on the group floor all night because the GM was afraid somebody would eventually be worn down or scared into complying. Long story short: Don’t go on trips for your internships my guys.
13. A Fountain Of Goodness
Please, I beg you. Never ever ever use a chocolate fountain from a hotel or banquet hall. Here’s a picture: it’s an expensive Sunday brunch at a five-star hotel. Well, here’s little Timmy who’s just double-fisted strawberries directly into that chocolate, bit into both strawberries then triple dipped into the chocolate AGAIN!
And some old rich lady just sneezed on it. And somebody else just dropped their snack into it. Oh, but the most disgusting part is so much worse. That very same chocolate gets strained and saved for the next week’s brunch. Chocolate is waaay too expensive to throw away. Chocolate also does this thing where it’ll seize if it has the wrong moisture content—usually from people dipping fruit, and the juices going into the chocolate.
So when chocolate gets so thick it won’t run through the machine, wanna know how they fix that? They add canola oil until it’s smooth again. So, yeah, next time you’re at a wedding and they have a chocolate fountain, think of this post. Think of this post when you dip into that dirty watered down with oil chocolate.
14. Not In My Rented Room
I worked in a hostel in Miami. I’ve learned to deal with a lot of different people. Some are eccentric, some are reserved, and some are just plain stupid. I’ve had a guest the past few nights who is obviously gay and sometimes tries to flirt with me. I personally have nothing against this—I actually find it flattering that he’s attracted to me.
But I do find it a little odd that he knows I’m straight and he still finds the need to flirt with me. I am a 6’1″ straight male and happily engaged to the love of my life. I am comfortable enough with myself and my own sexuality to not be at all bothered by this…but this other guest clearly struggles with that. At one point, the gay man came by and complimented my beard before heading into the guest-area kitchen.
Soon after, a man with a Scottish accent came to me with a complaint: “What the heck was that, mate? That queer just got all feely on you and you don’t have a problem?” I responded, “I’m sorry, sir, but how is that your business?” He said angrily, “Because a man like yourself shouldn’t have to be flirted with like you’re a pixie, mate.”
I stood back a bit, then told him, “I’m sorry that that bothers you, sir, but that is none of your concern. Please, enjoy the rest of your night.” That’s when things got really heated. “Oh, so you ARE gay,” he blurted out loudly. At that point, I just give him the ultimatum. “Sir, here we tolerate people of all backgrounds and sexualities. If you do not respect that, then you are welcome to find other accommodations for your stay here in Miami.”
He proceeded to flip me the bird and walk away to the guest area. Moments later, the man who was being a flirt came out and said that the guest came to the kitchen and called him and his friends’ names before he went to his room. I went after the guest to kick his dumb butt out, and he told me: “It’s fine, you queer-lover. I’m leaving anyway. This place doesn’t deserve my money.”
I proceeded to get his passport photo from our system and uploaded it to the group chat I was in with the other night auditors in the area. My new gay friend bought me some pizza and wings, so that was cool. After that, the rude guest tried to check into other hostels in the proximity and got rejected.
15. On Second Thought…
The escort thing was something I saw a lot at the desk. The best one was when the gentlemen got robbed by two young ladies and immediately demanded the front desk call the authorities. The attendant knew exactly what to do. He asked if he really wanted to call in and tell officers that he hired two escorts. The guest suddenly just grunted and marched up to his room.
16. Wait And See
So last night was probably the busiest night we’ve had for the last week. I’m a waitress at an upscale steakhouse restaurant. The hostesses up front put us at an hour-long wait for walk-ins because of so many booked reservations, which is the usual protocol from the general manager. Well, this particular couple had me FUMING beyond belief.
The front lobby is packed with guests waiting for a table while reservations are seated as soon as possible. The hostesses have a system on an iPad to let all the managers know which guest is seated where, how long they’ve stayed, etc. I’m bussing a table at my section when I overhear one of the hostesses try to speak to a pair of people at my section a booth over.
This couple walked into the restaurant, saw the number of people waiting for a table, and decided to seat themselves with NO reservation. They also sat at a dirty table, and here I’m thinking, “Are these people for real?” This is what I got between the hostess and the older man sitting down with his wife: “Excuse me, sir? You didn’t come up to the host stand in order for us to find out what reservation you had?”
“We don’t have reservations. Someone needs to clean this up.” Here, he points to the messy table. “I’m sorry sir, but if you don’t have a reservation the wait is going to be an hour long. Someone has already requested this booth by the fireplace and they need to be seated.” “We don’t care about reservations. We’re hungry and we’re going to eat. Get someone to clean our table! I’m not asking a third time!”
After that failure, the hostess looked at me, and she was pretty shaken up. She had never dealt with any guests THAT rude and upfront before, so it was understandable. With my Latina blood boiling, I went over to the jerks and gave them a piece of my mind. “This is my section, and after hearing that conversation, you both have no right to be served. There’s a family waiting for this table, and I’m going to ask you to leave. Unless you want me to get a manager to escort you out.”
The couple squawked at me, demanding I get them drinks, while I went straight to my manager, who saw what had already happened with the hostess. They were escorted out and were told they weren’t welcome back. Ever. This is the type of stuff I don’t think I’ll ever get used to. If you have to wait an hour-long for a table like everyone else, then you do it. If not, go to another restaurant.
17. A Room For Two…I Mean Three
The hotel where I work doesn’t want you to know that the people who stayed in the room before you were nasty. Sadly, housekeeping gets the brunt of it. I’ve seen them carry out bags of used adult toys, peel used condoms off of every surface, and scrub excrement—actual human excrement—off of places there’s no reason for it to be. But there’s one clean-up I’ll sadly never forget.
It was the couple that wanted a home birth but not, you know, at home—because, eww gross. We had to deal with that hazmat situation. We messed them as hard as we could with penalties and fees, though.
18. Mother Knows Best
I was working as night manager at a large hotel. We had four overnight staff: me, a cleaner, the night auditor, and a security guard. The guard’s duty is to continuously walk the 10 floors and listen for noise incidents. Our hotel is very close to a plaza that is FILLED with bars, including a very sketchy country bar that is known for over-serving and not checking IDs.
We saw three or four ladies in their late 40s and a younger girl leave shortly after 11, clearly dressed for the country bar. I thought it was a little weird to go clubbing with your mom and her friends, but whatever. Just before 1 am, the younger girl and one of the older ladies returned.
It was pretty obvious that the younger girl was quite out of it, but they were being quiet, so I didn’t hassle them on their way to the elevators. 20 minutes later, the older lady was heading back out to continue the party with her friends. Then, 20 minutes after that, we got a call from the security guard that a woman was passed out on the floor in the hallway.
I headed up to the floor in question and sure enough, slumped against a room door was the young lady from earlier. She was unresponsive to our verbal commands until she started throwing up. We rolled her into the recovery position and called an ambulance. While waiting for the ambulance, the mother and her friends returned to their rooms.
We informed the mother that we called an ambulance for her unconscious, unresponsive daughter, who was throwing up. Her reply was wild. She started SCREAMING! “How DARE you call an ambulance? What are they going to think? My husband is a first responder and will find out!”
Now, the cleaner arrived with the EMTs, who started making sure the young woman could breathe. They loaded her onto a stretcher to take her to the hospital. One of them did in fact know the mother and that is when we found out the daughter was only 16!!!! The mother then walked off with the ambulance crew, crying.
That was, by far, the weirdest and most stressful night I’d ever worked.
19. Tempest In A Teacup
At the hotel where I worked, we legit had someone once break into the archive room and scoff everyone’s credit card details. Nobody noticed until like a month later. It was a real mess. I’ve had to deal with people throwing furniture off balconies and onto other guests’ cars. Sadly, a lot of DV incidents. Hospitalizations. People taking their own lives.
We once had undercover detectives looking at CCTV for high end criminals. You name it. And don’t even get me started on how ‘clean’ those rooms are. Your $1,000/night does not reflect those standards. They still wash those teacups in the bathroom sink or the bathtub.
20. Keep Em Coming
Last night I worked a table of 14. They were all terrible people, the douchiest people I have ever come in contact with. The royal family of Worthless Jerk Land. One guy sits down and orders a pint. He says, “Every time you come to the table I want you to have a pint for me.” I thought he was probably just joking, so I leave and come back.
He says, “Where is my pint? Did you really forget what I told you like two minutes ago? Wow.” So I said, “OH! I am so sorry, it won’t happen again.” So, for the next two hours, no matter what, EVERY. SINGLE. TIME. I approached the table I left a pint. After about 45 minutes, the drinks began to pile up. I just didn’t ever stop.
Every time I put a drink down, he said nothing. If he would have acknowledged my presence and told me to stop, I would have. He said nothing. I started to feel bad, for a couple of minutes…and then he yelled at me like a dog to get the food out faster. THAT IS WHAT HE WANTED. I just want to reiterate that. HE ASKED FOR IT.
Also, I was watching him drink. If at any point his behavior or consumption increased, I would have stopped. He walked out the exact same way he walked in. Like a jerk. Anyway, it got so bad that the pints were SURROUNDING HIS SEATING AREA. Just glasses and glasses and glasses. It was incredible. I make my own drinks where I work, as we don’t have a typical bar, just a large server station.
A friend of King Doucherbottom even tried to take one that I put down, but I grabbed it. Then I said, “Sorry sir, this is your friend’s drink. I would be happy to get one for you if you like.” Long story short, he ended up buying 25 drinks at eight dollars a pop with a 20% mandatory auto-gratuity on the table. He maybe drank four.
I have never felt so good in my life. It doesn’t pay to be an arrogant jerk, folks! This was a crowning achievement in my seven years of serving. I work at a place where some people come in and treat me like a piece of stew meat, and I have learned to play the game in order to make money. I love my job and the people I meet, but I get stepped on a lot. It’s nice to win one for once.
No bartender was involved. I can’t deny the illegality of it, but I do not regret it! The bussers enjoyed the undisturbed drinks after he left, too. I felt so good bringing them back in a bus tub of ice. It was like seeing the excitement of children on Christmas morning. My manager saw the bill and was angry, but no reports of anything we would be liable for as of yet! And there was a sweet twist at the end.
They split the bill seven ways, and they did not even look at the charges. I put down the bill and the cards went on top. Their total bill was about $1,200 with everything included. This not common for a table of 14 where I work, but not surprising. I came out making around $240 before tip out. So all in all, a very good evening for me.
21. Walking On Broken Glass
I used to work events at hotels and sometimes we had stupid crazy things go on. Some of them, like this one, were actually dangerous to guests. So a customer broke a glass they were using and the broken glass fell inside a barrel we use for water refill. Right after this happened I left work for two weeks to go on vacation—assuming something would be done.
When I came back, I made a disturbing discovery. All the glass was still piled inside the water refill barrel. People must have been drinking out of it, because there were events booked while I was gone. It’s a miracle no one drank broken glass.
22. Musical Chairs
Today I’ve had probably the worst/best thing happen when bringing a group of 32 people to their table. I work in an all-you-can-eat restaurant where the people can pick out the food themselves and take it to their table. This means you need to walk back and forward once in a while to grab new food. Because of this, we don’t have rows of tables that exceed five people, so when you stand up there’s not a lot of people to walk past.
Otherwise, it’s like sitting in the middle of a row in a full cinema, having to go to the bathroom, and passing like 10 people in the process. So for this group of 32 people, we had three tables of 11 with five on each side and one at the head of the table. However, the woman who made the reservation HAD to have everyone sit attached to the same table, rather than having two small gaps in between each of the three tables so it’s easier to get up.
I tried explaining to this woman that this is very difficult as the seating will be less comfortable, but she kept on yelling and yelling that it HAD to happen. So I agreed and moved the tables against each other. What followed was probably the best five minutes of my life. Just watching 16 people struggle to get on the couch located next to the table.
After enjoying the view, I once again offered to the woman that I could move the tables slightly apart so it’s easier to stand up, but once again she started yelling that it had to be like this and she would complain to my manager if I offered again. They dined for 2.5 hours, and every time someone stood up, I watched seven other people having to move off the couch to the side of the table so one person could get their food, turning a five-second task into a five-minute task every single time.
This woman yelled at me, ignored friendly advice, and threatened to go to my manager, but in the end, she got a nice dose of karma.
23. Right In The Face
I was a bridesmaid for a family member’s wedding. We hired a super talented makeup artist to come in and make her look really good for her big day. This makeup artist, who was the quietest, shortest lady I’ve ever met in my whole life, starts doing her makeup. Once she finished it looked REALLY GOOD. I was just like “diddly dang, she’ll love this.” BOY was I wrong.
The bridezilla looked in the mirror and went absolutely BONKERS. She screeched, “It looks awful! YOU KNOW WHAT I WANTED!” She was crying, and her eye makeup was streaming down her face. We all rushed to calm her down. This poor makeup artist looks like she’s about to pee. So the makeup artist fixes her up despite her outburst and does basically the same thing but adds a little more eyeliner.
Suddenly the bridezilla LOVES IT.
24. Five Five-Star Stories
I worked in five star hotels in Beverly Hills. Boy, do I have stories: A sheikh picks up an escort in the bar, takes her to his room. She roofies him and steals tens of thousands of dollars of cash, watches and valuables. Also, husbands who will say hello to staff with their mistress on their arm on Thursday night, and their wife on Friday night.
A famous teen celebrity left a room full of needles and various paraphernalia behind for housekeeping to clean up. A Middle Eastern royalty ships in multiple Ferraris and Lamborghinis to the hotel from their home country to drive for the week; later that night he’s caught drag racing in the neighborhood of Beverly Hills.
The largest checkout bill I’ve ever seen was roughly $2 million for a guest who rented out an entire floor of suites for three weeks, promptly paid via wire transfer. I had to procure $100k cash for a guest whose wife wanted to shop on Rodeo Drive the next morning. The local bank doesn’t even have that much. I had to get an armored car from the central LA bank branch to deliver.
The list goes on.
25. The Writing On The Wall
In college, I worked for a floral shop that shared a space with a bakery. We had the space for both businesses to operate and it naturally was a good partnership. This story takes place near the end of my senior year. I was six weeks shy of graduating with two degrees. Although I cared about the stores and wanted them to do well, my nonsense-tolerance had dropped significantly.
One day, a woman came to me for balloons for her son’s 2nd birthday party. She had already picked up her cake. Woman (grumpily tossing her balloon choices at me): Ugh, I can’t believe the bakery. Me: Oh, is there something wrong? Woman: Yes! LOOK at this cake! She opens the box. It’s a nice-looking cake, decorated with icing and trains.
A scrolling script says: “Happy 2nd Birthday Jackson!” Me: … Woman: DON’T YOU SEE IT?! Me: I think it’s a lovely ca-” Woman: IT’S IN CURSIVE! WHY THE HECK WOULD THEY PUT IT IN CURSIVE? HE’S TWO! Me: Oh…well, it’ll take me a couple of minutes to fill these balloons. I bet you could take it back, and they could scrape off the old lettering, re-frost the blank space, and rewrite it for you.
Woman (clearly hasn’t heard a word I said): I CAN’T BELIEVE SOMEONE IS SO STUPID TO THINK THIS IS OKAY! Me (yelling above her): CAN YOUR SON EVEN READ?! She immediately fell silent, blushed a deep purple, and was silent while I filled her balloons. She paid without a word.
26. This Room Needs Something—More Gold!
My husband worked at several luxury hotels and residences—where rich people live at the hotels—and, besides how absolutely disgusting everything inside the rooms actually is, I was most shocked by the behavior of the ultra-rich. I’m not talking about businessmen and doctors. I’m talking Saudi princes and heirs to dynasty families.
The level of comfort and technology these people have come to expect is something we cannot imagine. “What do you mean there isn’t access to intercoms next to the bathroom? What about when I need services while going potty?” “The television inside the shower is only a 40-incher and there is no gold in this room. I need a better suite.”
“I’m gonna need you to go out, buy me better bedding, remake my bed, and then do it again tomorrow because I won’t sleep on the same bedding twice.” And that’s just the tip of the iceberg.
27. Putting Her In Her Place
I waited tables during college, and this is one of the best memories I have of my manager handling a rude guest. One of my tables was a gay couple at a booth. They were holding hands across the table basically the whole time they were at the restaurant. At one point, a lady with two small children flags me down from across the dining room.
Her table wasn’t in my section so I assumed she just wanted me to go find her server. I go over and ask her what I can do for her, and she says, “What the HECK is wrong with you? How can you possibly allow THEM in here? I’ve been coming here for 20 years and I’m appalled that they’d let a couple of those types eat here. Do me a favor and move those queers to a different table so my kids don’t have to see that sort of disgusting behavior.”
Literally, all they were doing was holding hands. Get over yourself lady. I wanted to tell her off for being such an intolerant witch, but instead just said, “One moment ma’am and I’ll get a manager for you.” I went and told my manager what was going on and he promptly went over to her table and told her that if she had an issue with other guests minding their own business and eating their food, then maybe she’d be better off not eating out at all.
She grabbed her kids and left without ordering. I always had a ton of respect for him for not putting up with horrible people’s issues.
28. The Early Bird Special
I work at a two-star family hotel. In the winter, we close only for Christmas, which is when we get our three-week paid leave. During the colder months, there are times when there are local events, and since the surrounding islands have no good infrastructure, many guests book at city center hotels like ours.
It was almost November when this happened—we had no rooms available on one particular night, but a guest came in. For the sake of the post, let’s call him Greg. A thin, tall, businessman type of guy with a mafia mustache and glasses. He looked to be in his mid-50s with grey hair. From the way he spoke, I could tell he was very educated. He walked in just half an hour before my shift ended.
Greg: “Good evening, I have a room booked for me and I know I’m early but I can wait.” Me: “Not at all, the check-in desk is 24/7.” Greg: “Magnificent, I can check in now then?” Me: “Of course, your name please?” Greg: “Greg McGregor.” Me: “Hmmm, I can’t seem to find your name…” Greg: “Oh, it’s there for sure, I booked just an hour ago while I was waiting at the bus terminal at the airport.”
At that point, I vaguely remembered the fax that was sent in. Me: “Oh of course, but your reservation is for… tomorrow?” Greg: “That’s correct, that’s why I asked if I could check in now.” Me: “I‘m afraid you cannot check-in now, as the reservation is for tomorrow, and I don’t have any rooms for tonight to extend your reservation.” Greg: “It doesn’t matter, I can wait a few hours until it’s ready then! Can you point me to an outlet so I can plug in my laptop while I wait?”
Me: “Sir… the check-in time is after 2 o’clock of the day you have reserved. Not midnight the day before.” Greg: “I respectfully disagree. I am taking the room at 1:01 am just like you promised me.” At the time, I did not fathom what he was trying to say. I have had guests that believed they were entitled to the room at midnight…but why 1:01 am?
After much thought, I decided to check his reservation form directly. The request was auto-approved as we have configured auto-approvals for non-chargeable check-in or check-out times, but they are strictly for checking-in after midnight of the next day, not the previous.
Me: “This is an auto-approval message. It clearly states here and here that it’s for the next day, not the previous.” Greg: “No problem, I can check in at 2:01 am then.” Me: “I’m not sure you understand what I mean.” This is when he started getting spicy. Greg: “You think that you’re the manager here?” Me: “Actually, I am.” Greg: “I will post a negative review then for not keeping your word.”
Me: “Please exit the hotel now or I will call the authorities.” Greg: “Well, okay…I’m afraid you lost ONE MORE GUEST NOW. You may cancel my reservation for tomorrow.” He left as if he thought that all was well. Well, needless to say, he is not getting a refund. Don’t tick off the front desk, people.
29. He Survived The Purge
A hotel I worked at roughly 20 years ago, had that popcorn texture stuff on the ceiling. We were a five-star hotel—but that always felt like a stretch. I remember a guest took his own life in one of our bigger suites, and painted the popcorn ceiling in blood. A couple of people from housekeeping straight up quit rather than deal with it when management tried to push them into cleaning blood and matter off a popcorn ceiling.
One guy came up with an ingenious plan. He said he’d do it, but he wanted a promotion and a five year contract with a payout in the event of early dismissal. There was an argument about it and it was like three days of calling around getting quotes and arguing with lawyers about if they could give him that contract before they gave in.
By this time the smell was getting complaints from the entire floor. So, the dude ended up doing the whole cleanup with a pair of drywall ceiling stilts. He got the promotion and the contract he wanted. That can’t have been legit even then. But management didn’t want the fuss of a hazmat or professional cleanup crew going through the hotel. It wouldn’t look good for the other guests.
I left a few months after that, but a few years later, I heard from a former coworker that they’d had an incident and fired all of housekeeping and maintenance—except for that guy. He was the only person to survive the purge.
30. Tone Deaf
Each Sunday, the hotel hosts an afternoon tea for the grey set. This started after my shift ended. All was well when I left, but when I came in the next day, I heard about an older lady who had a heart attack and passed at the afternoon tea. My manager called me into her office, I assume to ask if I was okay, etc. Nope, screw that.
She actually said, with all seriousness, “Why did you leave so early yesterday? We could have used your help with the medical emergency. The other manager struggled to cope.” I was SHOCKED. I bluntly said, “Are you serious? How was I to know someone was planning on having a heart attack and passing an hour after my shift ended?!”
She responded, “Well, you could try and make a habit of staying back a little in case we need help…” I noped out of that and walked out. I finished my shift exactly on time that day.
31. Money Can’t Buy Class
Strap in, folks. This is going to be a bumpy ride. I work in a relatively high-end country club in the American South. We had a doozy last season. It was not only the bride who was crazy, but the whole wedding party. The “Happy Couple” were not members of the club, but had convinced our coordinator to sign off on it.
However, this coordinator quit shortly after booking, and a new girl had to deal with the fallout. First off, they had been extremely rude to our new coordinator and managers through the whole planning process. They had a private coordinator as well, but she was pretty well useless. Ours didn’t even know she existed until the rehearsal.
The bride had demanded all kinds of free stuff during the planning. Now, I have no problem doing a wine tasting to go with the food tasting. However, if you come back three times to try the same free samples, I’m not playing ball anymore. You’re paying for it at that point. You and the five people with you. Fast forward to the rehearsal.
We have regular dinner service going on in our dining room for our (rather exclusive) members. Renting the ballroom for a day does not entitle you to take over the entire clubhouse. The bridal party are drinking, yelling, cursing, and being generally ugly all over the grounds. Nothing was right, according to the private coordinator who had never seen the space before this.
Everything had to be moved. “What do you mean your covered terrace can’t accommodate 250 people for the ceremony without an extra tent?” “I was told the dance floor would be by THOSE windows, not these.” “We absolutely cannot let anyone into the ballroom until after the ceremony, so I don’t care that the terrace is only accessible through it, make them all walk around the building through the wet grass.”
This whole time, the bridal party is getting louder and drinking more. The little old ladies trying to eat poached salmon in peace are obviously annoyed. Father of the bride has set up a provisional account to pay for the wedding, since we don’t accept cash or cards, only accounts. The bridal party knows the account number, and we’ve been told to put everything on it by our managers, as long as the person ordering knows the number.
You can see where this is going. He didn’t see it that night, but he argued every single drink when the bill came. Even the 18-year-old scotch that he alone was drinking. Okay, enough of the day before. On to the main event. Most of this day I was on the periphery, since I was working on the other end of the building. This is the end they weren’t supposed to be on, except the bride and bridesmaids, since their dressing room was on that side.
I could still hear pretty much everything that was happening, and saw way more than I should have. As guests arrived, they were directed around the outside, as per the request. The mother of the bride freaks out because OF COURSE they didn’t want HER side of the family to have to go that way. They need to be allowed to walk through the active dining room and around the other side where the golf course is.
At this point, the groom and groomsmen are getting positively sloshed in the men’s locker room, which our members are still using as well. Bridesmaids have moved out of the ladies’ locker room and are rampaging through the members’ bar. And by that I mean that we caught them multiple times pouring drinks behind the bar while the bartenders were getting their bar ready in the ballroom.
They had the same move every time of, “Oh, gosh, how did this bottle get in my hand and why is it suddenly half empty? Haha, silly me!” The ceremony goes well enough, considering basically everyone standing up front could barely stand. You may be asking how we let it get to that point. Well, they had snuck in a lot of drinks. I mean, a lot…
Highlights of the reception: The bride is cursing. A lot. I don’t think one sentence came out of her mouth without a variant of a swear word. During hors d’oeuvres, the maid of honor comes out of the locker room and informs me that it “needs attention.” You know, the room where only they had been for the last three hours because they had scared off all the members already.
It shouldn’t have been my job, but the attendant had gone home early due to an emergency, so I figured I would take a look. I was horrified at what I saw. I came right back out to get every manager I could find. I even cleared the coast so our chef could come look after he saw my reaction. It was, quite simply, disgusting.
The small wastebasket was overflowing because they had put a bunch of stuff on top of the nice big covered one and then forgot about it. Part of the overflow was a used tampon. There are separate baskets in the stalls for those. Dirty panties, about 10 empty champagne bottles, everything a normal person would put aside or throw away just sat wherever it had fallen.
I removed the trash (with gloves on) and didn’t touch one thing that was personal. I should have thrown out a lot more. About 1.5 hours in, the bride asks the bartender what Black people drink, so she can get something to give to the band. When she is told we don’t serve the band drinks due to liability, she flips out. More cursing.
How dare we not do exactly what she wants? Do we know how much she is paying for this? Not nearly as much as a lot of our members pay for theirs, I can tell you. Her new husband manages to somewhat calm her down eventually. By this point, all of the guests are so loud and obnoxious and not staying on their end of things that we call in extra security just to stand at all access points and wrangle them.
Remember all those “hidden” drinks? About two hours into the reception, the security guard nearest to the men’s restroom hears an awful noise from inside. Goes to investigate and finds a broken urinal and an empty handle of Jack Daniels. Time for cake! This can’t go wrong can it? Oh, it does go wrong. Wifey smears cake on the lower half of Hubby’s face.
Haha! So cute! Hubby puts tiny dollop of icing on end of Wifey’s nose. “OH MY GAWD!! HOW DARE YOU DO THAT?! YOU’RE RUINING EVERYTHING!!” (Paraphrased. It went on waaay longer than that). She proceeds to go literally running through the entire clubhouse and most of the surrounding grounds screaming at the top of her lungs.
As it was a nice night, many of our members were enjoying the patio off the dining room. One member in particular had been listening to the hubbub, and asked me the names of the couple. I had to laugh when I remembered that he’s a prominent divorce lawyer. I, jokingly, asked if he wanted me to pass out his card. He, very seriously, said yes.
The party was shut down two hours early. Officers were informed of potential drunk drivers leaving the property. The bridal party were staying in rental houses on club grounds, so our security escorted them back. You’d think that would be the end. But, alas, no. I did not witness the next day’s meeting, but I gather it involved a lot of apologies from the groom, and a lot more angry words for everyone from the bride.
Plus debates about the bar bill from dear old dad, because they could not possibly have had three kegs in that short of a time. He was right, sorry for the mistake, we should have charged for the fourth tapped keg. About a week later, we were informed of an investigation claiming that one of our staff had taken the bride’s laptop.
For maybe two weeks, we were randomly called by the local authorities with updates on the case. Then she found it in the trunk of her car, where it had been the entire time, because they used a club-owned laptop to play their slideshow. Which she had tried to walk out with. I think that’s the whole story. I probably blocked some stuff out. Except there’s one last twist.
We think the original coordinator did this to us on purpose. She didn’t leave under the best terms, and confirming the booking was one of the last things she did. She must have known it would go like this.
32. I Don’t Think This Is Appropriate
A dear friend of mine works for a small luxurious hotel in London. He told me that the concierge system there is absolutely absurd. At the hotel, money buys everything. Anything the clients want, the clients get. The staff are told never to say no. In the worst case, they can say, “I don’t think this is really appropriate.”
Obviously, it’s mostly illicit substances and escorts that are the classics. My friend showed me his phone: he had 20 phone numbers of dealers in it. He uses the numbers to be able to get whatever the customers want—literally anything. My friend’s quite smart though: He never buys for the guest, he only gets people in contact.
But those shady tasks are just the beginning. For these, my buddy goes through professional concierges who charge A LOT. You want a new Prada dress at 2 AM for the party you are about to attend? Sure thing, let’s wake a few people up, charge triple the price, and split the benefit between people involved. Have a good night madam.
You want tickets for the Wimbledon final that takes place tomorrow? You have £20k? Enjoy the game, sir. But in some cases, the clients go way too far. Like when a couple of clients came back after a night out and asked my friend to do it with the wife while the husband was watching and filming. That’s when he felt like it was a good time to say “I don’t think this is really appropriate”.
33. His Garden Had No Earthly Delights
The concierge at the hotel I worked at was Les Clefs D’or and had all the connections. This dude could get you into the French Laundry restaurant on the same day. He would often greet guests with sangria and sprigs of mint from his garden. Sometimes he had lemon slices from his tree too! He loved to tell guests all about his garden and they ate it up. But there was something they didn’t know.
Yeah, that was all lies. Mint, lemon, and any other garnish we got from the local grocery store. The sangria? Cheapest boxed stuff we could find. But he sold the story like no other. At the end of the day, it worked.
34. Interminable Interns
The worst things I’ve seen at work I’ve seen are corporate intern events where the kids would get plied with drinks. Infuriating. We had one company annually bring 80 interns as part of a site visit tour, and it was a nightmare. I was sure someone would die every year. One year there were three hospitalizations though, and one of the boys sent the hospital bill to the hotel.
To be clear, the entire food and beverage team knew about the event and were very vigilant about refusing service. We were not involved or liable in his medical issue. The audacity. Particularly because he and all of his intern colleagues trashed everything. We had to prepare the lobby by removing sculptures and porcelain plant pots.
One year we started removing a kind of sharp-cornered bookcase because too many wasted interns had hurt themselves on it. There were bodily fluids everywhere and linens destroyed beyond continued use. Plumbing broke daily. There was always smoke damage in some rooms. But all the adults were useless, of course. And all adults were culpable in providing drinks to the underage people.
The company accepted the bill for the damage every year, and always came back. And we would add literally everything we could. We would tack on weeks’ worth of room nights onto their bill because we had to keep dozens of rooms out of service while damage was repaired. The company paid for everything, and we comped for complaining guests too.
They also paid for anything we had to replace, and they were so used to the damage fees we would just throw things in there sometimes. Like a treadmill finally broke during their residence. But did one of their guests break it? Don’t know, didn’t care, they bought us a new treadmill. The craziest part? We were just one of three hotels on this annual tour.
35. A Card-Carrying Fool
I was serving a family. The parents were clearly in their 50s/60s, while their kids were in their mid-20s. When ordering drinks, I carded the kids but not the parents. The mom pipes up with the whole, “Heyyy I don’t look that old, why didn’t you card meeeeeeeee?????????” I respond with, “Okay, let me see your ID, then.” It all went so wrong.
As it turns out, mommy dearest left her wallet at home. I inform her that, unfortunately, once requested, I am legally not allowed to serve her drinks unless she produces a valid ID. Obviously, she’s FURIOUS about this, so I send the manager over to confirm with her that I am not allowed to serve her. It almost goes without saying that I didn’t receive a tip, but hopefully, this idiot learned something today.
36. Hotel Havoc
I used to work as a front desk agent at a boutique hotel. A guy who was obviously very full of himself came in with an online reservation that he had booked at a shockingly cheap nightly rate. He proceeded to give me a hard time about EVERYTHING, from telling me he shouldn’t have to give me his credit card info since he had prepaid his reservation, to telling me “Um yeah, I’m pretty sure I can find the elevators, I’m not stupid.”
He was just being an all-around jerk. About 10 minutes after checking him in, he came down and demanded that we give him a bigger room with a king bed and a view, even though he had booked a standard queen bed online. I complied, as we had extra king beds available. But that was just the beginning of the nightmare. 10 minutes later, he came down again to complain about the size of the room.
He told me, “I’m only going to give you one more chance to make me happy,” and asked for the general manager. After much arguing between him and my manager, we ended up giving him our nicest suite AND free parking since we had “Given him trouble.” He got all this for a way cheaper rate, like $40 per night! Oh, but he outdid himself.
Get this: He informed us shortly after the ordeal, while on his way out to dinner, that he was not even going to be in the room for the majority of his stay, as he was visiting friends and would be staying at their home. What the heck! So I got my revenge. I made it my personal mission to make his life a living nightmare from that point on.
I reset his room keys every time I saw him leave the hotel—which was quite frequently, 3-4 times a day. It was particularly funny when he came back tired from a night out and had to come all the way down to the front desk to get his keys fixed. Needless to say, he was very frustrated by the end of his stay. I doubt he’ll be staying with us again.
37. Silence Is Golden
I waited tables and tended bar for years before switching to my current career. One day, this table comes in, eats, drinks, pays cash. I tell them to have a great day and walk away. While taking a drink order at a new table, I notice the lady standing there angrily, and I make eye contact with her husband and he looks really embarrassed.
I finish taking the drink order and go over to them. “Yes? Is there a problem?” She tells me I gave her the wrong change and was really nasty about it. I can’t remember exactly what it was, but I had intended to round up to avoid pennies. You heard me right…pennies. Like, their change was supposed to be $3.78 and I intended to give them $3.80.
Well, I guess I made a mistake this time and gave them $3.75. Either way, she was really rude. She showed me the receipt, and I apologized and admitted my error. But then came the best part. Looking at it, I pointed out that I had forgotten to ring up her coffee, and that I would be right back with an updated check. She was angry that she ended up paying more than if she’d just kept her mouth shut.
38. Holding Back The Booze
I worked as a bartender at a five-star hotel in England that hosted events and stuff. One thing that was common was this: my manager would just spam extra drinks onto the bill at events to make more money. Or, for example, if a big wedding ordered 50 bottles of champagne, they’d only give them 30 and would keep 20 back. If they ran out, the wedding party would have to buy more.
I reported this to senior management and they just laughed saying it’s normal. I actually got told off for not taking part in this.
39. Dog Eat Dog World
Nothing grinds my gears more than when people try to exploit the service dogs loophole. This lady came in and wouldn’t answer the two legal questions we are required to ask them about their service dogs. She kept mouthing off that it was wrong to ask, which was a major red flag. She kept going off about how much trouble I was going to be in. Little did she know the tables would be turned…
Sure lady. So I went ahead and printed out the rules about them. She refused to read them even though I highlighted the parts where it says I am allowed to ask these questions. She kept saying “I have papers, here read them.” Finally, she let it slip that it was a “comfort” thing. I was being respectful the whole time, but also stern.
“But I got let inside a courthouse before. I have a vest and certificate to show. I paid $40 dollars for it!” This was another red flag since training for a service dog is expensive! Yes, ma’am, you got let in because you purposely misidentified your dog as a service dog. She then said she forgot her charger in the car and never came back. People like her ruin it for real service dogs.
40. If Only J. Lo Knew
I am a subcontractor that works in the IT business and in my experience, the W hotel in Miami Beach has seen some real messes. One day I came into work and there was a big scramble at the upper floors— that is where the penthouses are. It seems this kinda-known millionaire had partied a little too hard and was destroying the room.
He was actually throwing furniture off the balcony, ripping everything out of the fridge—he might have even thrown a mattress out the balcony. Of course it was a big deal at the time, but they keep it hush with no officers involved. A guy that’s paying 9k-13k a night is not going to be taken away in cuffs: especially in front of the other guests.
When the clean-up team finally got into the room there were illicit substances all over the tables, bottles everywhere, and a couple of high class call girls that were in true fear. The next day they booked the same room for Jennifer Lopez.
41. Dishing It Out
Boy oh boy, some people. This happened yesterday. I’ll keep this short and not bore anyone with unnecessary back-story about the type of restaurant I work in, or anything about the set up. All you need to know is that: First, it’s fairly small, so I work alone with one chef; second, it’s family-friendly; and finally, we have a wide menu, with options ranging from $7.00 dishes to our most expensive $17.50 dish.
Not very pricy at all. One day, I received a phone call asking specifically about our $17.50 dish—our seafood paella. It’s made fresh to order, and takes about 15-20 minutes to make. Not to mention that seafood is expensive. So, the price is justified. The person I was speaking to asked if we were a buffet. We are not. I told them we are table service, and can do the paella any time.
I asked if they wanted to make a reservation because of the time it takes to prepare the paella. They said no, and hung up. So I went about my day. A few hours later, a family of four comes in. They sit down, glance at the menus, and then wave me over with a snap of the father’s fingers (gotta love that). The dad then says, “Show me the paella.”
I direct him to the back of the menu, where it’s listed very clearly and shows the ingredients and the price. Him: “I want that.” I write it down. The mother then says she wants a paella, followed by the two kids saying the same. So I confirm. Me: “So that’s four paellas? You don’t want to share?” Dad: “No. We’ll all have paella.”
So I put the order in after reminding him it’ll take about 15 minutes. I offered them drinks, but they just wanted water. I started getting the cheap vibe, but they ordered FOUR paellas, so how cheap could they be? Food comes out. They love it. Dad asks if he could get one to go. I put the order in so it would be ready when they finish.
We’re at five paellas now, and almost $90, before tax. I let the chef/owner know my concerns that the family may object to this price despite having made it clear to them. He gave me the okay to give them a 10% discount right off the bat. He’s a good guy. The time comes to bring the bill, and the man’s eyes go super wide.
I wrote out the bill so that every paella has $17.50 next to it. I watch as realization hits. He opens his mouth to object, and I immediately say, “The owner said to give you a discount because you ordered five of our most expensive dish and he wanted to thank you. He was happy to hear that you enjoyed it enough to order another to take home.” That shut him up. I then watch as he scans every last line of the bill and then settles on the tax, which was nearly $11.
Him: “You added a tip for yourself?” He was angry. Me: “No sir.” Him: “What’s this then?!” Me: “…The tax.” Honestly, I wasn’t expecting a tip at that point, but he did leave me 10%. So basically the discount we had given him. They said the food was excellent, but I highly doubt they’ll be back. For some reason, they thought ordering the same dish would equal just the price of one dish.
42. An Unnatural Disaster
I have a few stories from my 20s when I worked at a five-star hotel. Once, there was a natural disaster that required all staff to stay on-site with a floor to themselves. Before you knew it, bathtubs were filled with ice and booze, and managers were found wandering back halls in their undies. Our Michelin chef and food and beverage manager were caught on camera cheating on their partners in a stairwell.
There were leaders from the government in town for global governmental meetings, eating chicken in the lobby and throwing the bones on the floor. What a mess.
43. Pie In The Sky
First, let me explain a few things here. This is not my story as such, but I got to witness it firsthand. A good friend of mine is from a family that owns three very successful Italian restaurants, with a pizza oven that uses actual wood, so really top of the line. So he learned the business basically from the day he could walk.
When he was 25, he had a good business idea: A place in the middle of the city that sells mostly slices out of a window, but also whole pizza, pasta dishes, and salad, and does delivery. Plus a few small tables inside if someone wants to eat here. He created a solid business plan, and had his eyes on a prime location. It is 50 meters away from the biggest parking area in the city.
There are 400 parking spots there, where several times a year we have big city fairs, and anybody who wants to go in the park strolls right by it. So his dad said he would finance him, but as a credit to be paid back in a timely manner. They agreed on everything, and a year later he opened up. The story takes place about two years after they have opened and the place is HOT.
He already repaid almost 75% of the credit in a mere two years. Usually, there is a line for the slices, which are from a huge family-size pizza. One day, we are sitting at a table playing chess, while his guys run the shop; he had already worked a full 11 hours that day. In comes a baby boomer couple, and it was clear as day that the lady with the you-know-which haircut rules this relationship with an iron fist.
They sat down at the table next to us, and after not even a minute she rudely asked us why she has no menu yet, and to get off our lazy butts. I already wanted to tell her I do not work here, but my friend winked at me and walked over to their table, giving them our menus. The lady says to him, “It’s about time you get off your lazy butt.” By the way, she has now waited a minute. “You can’t play chess when you have people waiting. What kind of service is this?”
So my friend took their drink orders and walked behind the bar to make their drinks right away. They had to wait maybe three minutes for their drinks. When he comes back, she says, “About time, did you have to brew it first, or what is taking so long?” At this point, my friend’s patience is starting to wear thin, but he still stays friendly.
Friend: “You saw me walk to the bar and make your drinks right away, then return right away. Those drinks take a bit to pour correctly. I am sorry, but there is no way I could have brought those to you any faster.” Her: “We are customers and this is how you talk to us? Ever heard of the customer is always right? How can you be so rude to paying customers?” Now my friend really had enough.
Friend: “I was very respectful toward you, while you were very rude from the moment you came in here—“ The moment he said that, she got this weird grin on her face, and you could tell this was EXACTLY what she wanted. Her: “SHUT UP ! How dare you!!! I will have you know that me and the owner are old friends. I will have your job over this, now get me your manager.”
This is where it got so good. He decides to mess with her. Friend: “PLEASE, I need this job.” Her: “TOO LATE, you should have thought about this before you treated guests this rudely. NOW. GET. ME .THE . MANAGER.” Friend: “Right away miss.” He then went behind the bar and had a short talk with one of the older guys working there.
They then both return to the table. Server: “What seems to be the problem?” Well, this woman changed so fast. Suddenly she played the sweet old lady. “When we came in here, your server sat there with someone and played chess. We waited and waited, and finally asked nicely if we could have a menu. He rolled his eyes at us and gave us the menu from his table.”
She tells the rest of her “story” in her sweet voice, then says, “Since I know the owner, and we eat here all the time, usually, the service is excellent. I demand you fire him and comp our meals.” The new server turns to my friend and asks, “Is that really what happened?” Friend: “Of course not, she came—” Then the lady’s mask drops again.
She starts screeching, “What are you asking him for? I just told you what happened. Are you calling me a liar? Wait until the owner hears of this.” At this point, my friend and the server could no longer hold it back and they started laughing. Her: “YOU THINK THIS IS FUNNY, NEVER EVER HAVE I BEEN SO INSULTED.” Well, enough was enough.
Friend: “Yeah I know, wait until the owner hears of this. Oh wait, the owner already did hear of this. I AM THE OWNER, and I have never seen you in my life, nor have you ever eaten here. You two are just trying to scam a free meal out of me, by being impossibly difficult until the server finally snaps or does something wrong.”
Wow, I had no idea people could get that red in the face. She put 10 dollars on the table immediately. Friend: “Now GET OUT.” And they shuffled out, never to return. BOY that was the most entertaining attempt to scam him I have ever witnessed.
44. This Food Tastes Glassy
I’m honestly shocked at this story. I used to work as a bartender for the shrewdest jerk I’ve ever met. He would bring in international kids as servers and charge them $50 a day to live on-premises; you never got time and a half, he’d just switch to paying you under the table instead. Point is, he wasn’t afraid of breaking the law in the slightest.
One day I broke a glass in the general vicinity of the ice machine and he immediately whipped around and started questioning me, “How close was it? Are you sure the lid was closed? Are you absolutely sure nothing got in the ice?” Yeah, the lid was closed, but I was ready to close the entire bar just to clean out the ice machine. That’s what you do when there’s a risk of glass being mixed in with ice.
But this guy didn’t want to do the right thing. This is the same guy who wanted the cooks to charge themselves if they made food to eat after their shift. You do not mess with glass in people’s food, just one incident can shut down an entire restaurant.
45. By Any Other Name
I’m a server. A guest walks into brunch and orders our smoked salmon plate. The only dairy in this particular dish is a ramekin of cream cheese that is served on the side. A couple of minutes later, I’m in the kitchen getting coffee for another table. I turn around and the smoked salmon lady has followed me to the kitchen. When I turn around and see her, I ask, “Is there something you need?”
She says, “I forgot I’m not eating dairy, so can I change my order to the buttermilk pancakes?” Confused at what I just heard, I ask, “The buttermilk pancakes? There is dairy in the pancakes…” “Well, as long as it’s not a lot it’s ok.” Lady…..it’s like the main ingredient. It’s in the name. BUTTERMILK pancakes. Do people really listen to the stupidity that comes out of their face holes??? I can’t.
46. Thirsting For More
Wedding coordinator here! I’ve found the moms are usually worse than the brides. I worked a wedding this past summer with a ridiculous Momzilla. During the rehearsal, she handed me the box of decorations and said, “Don’t you dare make this look tacky.” On the day of the wedding, she arrived and came up to ask me where the wedding programs were.
I told her there weren’t any programs in any of the boxes and she proceeded scream at me for losing them and then decided that I took them. She also asked that we build a water station for the guests, but instructed us that she didn’t want the guests to have access to it until after the ceremony. It was 90 degrees that day and the ceremony was outside, so that did not go over well.
And when the guests complained that they were thirsty and we weren’t letting them go to the water station, she told them how horrible we were and made a big deal of opening the water station early, like she was the hero. Thank God they only booked the venue for the ceremony, so she was only my problem for about an hour. But that wasn’t the end of the story.
The next day, my boss handed me an email the Momzilla sent her. She wrote about how I lost the programs, but then in the same sentence said she found the programs in her hotel room later that night and made a comment about how I should’ve gone to her hotel and gotten them. She also complained about how I wouldn’t give her guests water and how the photographer was the worst person she’s ever worked with.
She actually wrote, “Don’t bother remembering her name, she’ll never work in his town again” about the photographer, like she was a Hollywood producer. Her letter ended with her complimenting the venue space—and then came the line I’ll never forget. “I think I would be a great addition to your team of event coordinators! Let me know when I can start!”
Yep, this witch was blatantly trying to take my job. The worst part, though, is that my boss actually hired her. Needless to say, I quit working at that venue.
47. A Night To Forget
I worked in security at a five-star hotel and I’ve got some advice for guests. If you’re in a five star hotel bar, be very careful who you talk to, and how much you drink—even if you can afford to get wasted on $25 drinks. Some locals slip stuff into drinks and before you know it, you’ve been robbed of thousands of dollars.
I’ve had to do investigations of instances where a guy ends up in a room with a stranger and she’ll get him to take out cash at the ATM because she has pics of what they’ve been up to and knows he’s married. All the while the guest has no memory of the whole night.
48. Concerned Citizen
A few weeks back, when we were completely booked, a guest complained about the smell of substances coming from a room. I asked them which room they thought it was coming from, and I made my way there. I went up to the unit and knocked on the door. There was a group of like eight or nine people, and they were definitely having a party. I told them someone reported the smell and I asked if they had anything.
The room didn’t smell strongly of it, but it definitely seemed like they had some. They assured me they didn’t, and I left it at that. I wasn’t allowed to search the room and they were keeping quiet, so I just apologized and left. About 10 minutes later, the same guest called down to complain again, except this time he said, “I know you probably can’t call the authorities, but I can if you want.”
“No, sir, I do not need you to call the authorities on that guest. I will check on them again.” “I can do it, just let me know.” Honestly, this time I just did a walk-by of the room; I still couldn’t smell anything, and in my hotel, you can usually smell everything. I went back down and relaxed for a few minutes when a guest walked into the lobby. “Do you need anything, sir?”
“No, I’m just waiting on someone.” I recognized his voice as the guest who’d been calling down. About 20 minutes went by and one of my city’s finest, whom I know because he had been at the hotel for other problems before, walked in and said he got a call. “I didn’t—” “That was me!” said this jerk.
“I think there’s someone puffing up next to me and this fellow isn’t doing anything about it.” The officers went up, spoke to the guests who I’d already spoken to, then came back down. I asked them if they found anything, but of course, they didn’t. I apologized for wasting their time. One of the things we have guests sign is a paper saying that if they cause a disturbance to other guests, we reserve the right to ask them to leave.
This includes loud noises, verbal or physical harassment, and basically, anything we feel violates the safety or well-being of another guest. So I asked the officers to stick around for a minute—and I got my revenge. I called the guest who had called them and informed him he had violated our disturbance policy and needed to leave.
Of course, he fought back and started yelling at me over the phone. I asked the officers to accompany me up to the room, and together we walked the guy out of my hotel. He should’ve just listened to me in the first place. By the way, the guests who had been bothered were very understanding. Management compensated them on the next day that they were in. They didn’t have a problem with us at all.
49. Fighting For What’s Yours
One of my favorite co-workers is a woman who’s been serving for over 30 years. She’s not well-liked by many because she’s meaner than an entire bag of piranhas, but if you can fire back (and do your job right) she’ll respect you and be your best friend. She told me a story today from back in the 80s when she first started.
She sees this guy come in wearing a really nice suit, and she watches him take the cash someone left as a tip, right off of the darn table, as she’s going back into the kitchen. She walks up to him and says, “I saw you take that. I want that money back on the table when I get back out here.” She returns to the floor after a minute holding a pitcher of water.
Lo and behold, the money isn’t there. As she passes the table, she “trips” and dumps this pitcher of ice water all over this guy in his nice suit in the middle of a Michigan winter. She goes into a fake bout of apologetics. “Oh my goodness I’m so sorry sir! I’m so sorry!” Then she leans in and whispers: “I’ll be back in a minute with the coffee.”
She comes out a minute later, coffee pot in hand, to find that her money has mysteriously reappeared.
50. Booked And Busy
I work for one of the most recognizable hotel brands in the world and we have a few of them in town. This happened over a year ago. My former colleague was trying to find a reservation that was not traceable. No matter which name the guest gave us, nothing would show. I was working with her on this particularly busy, sold-out Friday night.
My colleague (we’ll call her Jane) dealt with this lady, but I was sorting out other things on our system to ensure that we didn’t mess anything up after checking in a lineup of guests. This is how I remember it: Jane: “Is your reservation possibly at the other hotel?” Lady: “No. It’s here. I booked here.”
Jane: “Okay…after opening my search parameters, I can’t seem to find anything. Let me just give them a call to verify. “Lady: “Absolutely not. I booked here so you’re going to find my reservation.” Jane: “Okay, I forgot to ask, do you have a confirmation number?” Lady: “No, but I booked here.” Jane: “Did you get a confirmation email sent to you?”
Lady: “I might have. But it doesn’t matter because I booked here.” Jane: “Okay, well, I’m going to call the other hotel.” Lady: “No! I know I booked here. I have my family with me and we specifically booked this hotel.” Jane: “As I said before, I can’t find it. And we’re sold out, so I will not be able to accommodate you until I figure out that your reservation is being held here.”
Lady: “Well, it must be your system. You’re going to make it work even if my reservation didn’t show up.” As this lady kept freaking out at Jane, repeatedly saying that she booked here over and over, I took it upon myself to call the other hotel while she was not paying attention. The lady noticed me and I was already on the phone with them before it was too late.
I just remember how wide her eyes got as the conversation I was having with the other hotel was transpiring. I’m sure you can guess what they told me. Me: “Lady, I just verified with the other hotel, and your reservation is, in fact, at the other hotel.” The lady didn’t say a single word and walked out the door. Pride is a tough thing to swallow.
51. Wife Mistaken For Professional
I once worked at a hotel that fancied itself as a five star. But let’s be real: it was barely a three. Our oil baron owner spent all of his free time at the hotel instead of at his main business, and loved to have staff bow to his every whim: while paying an absurdly low wage. Eventually, low wages equaled an extremely low-skilled workforce.
Nowhere was that more evident than in our security department. While some of them were ex-army—some of the funniest people I ever had the pleasure of working with—the newer ones fancied themselves as future officers of the law. One of the perps this group of keeners was most on the lookout for were the human scum who would dare to solicit a call girl while staying in our prestigious, virgin establishment. Ha!
Cut to a normal Friday night. We had in-house, a large group of conference attendees, all of whom seemed to retire to their rooms fairly early compared to most conventions. The reason for this was that they were a conference of elderly evangelicals. So Brad, one of the keener security personnel, spotted a lone white female entering the room of one of our guest attendees during the overnight hours.
Brad, going by natural instinct instead of consulting with front desk staff, went straight to that room and knocked on the door with the might of a warrior. When the perplexed elderly minister appeared at the door, Brad asked to speak to him in the hallway, and in a pointed yet whispery drawl, asked, “Sir, is that an, uh, escort that went into your room.”
The guest, with astonishment and not even a hint of anger simply said, “That would be my wife. Her flight just arrived.” And that is how we managed to have our first ever all-employee meeting.
52. Let It All Out
Oh my God, this was one of my most embarrassing moments. I was 18 and working in a Mexican restaurant. It was a table of four, two couples, who were pretty friendly and laughing. One woman was a grouch, but no big deal. One guy asks, “What is the “chor-IZ-o”? Me: Chorizo? It is basically a Mexican version of sausage, this one is spicy.
Other guy: “Ooooh! Can I get you to put the Mexican sausage into my fish taco?” LONG PAUSE. I proceed to absolutely lose my mind. I laughed until I was crying. I thought it was a joke! It only got worse when…One girl: I don’t get it…. Other girl: OH MY GOD Guy: I …uhhh… didn’t mean it that way. Worst server moment ever.
It still makes me so embarrassed. I ran back to the kitchen and traded tables. Apparently, I am an 11-year-old boy inside.
53. A Taste Of Her Own Medicine
I finally did it. I stood up for myself. I had an angry Karen harassing me and I straight up told her she’d be denied service. She told me I couldn’t do that, and I told her we had the right to deny service and that I was exercising that right. She pulled out her phone, hoping the threat of her showing it to my boss would get me to submit.
I told her on camera that she couldn’t harass the staff. She went off about how she couldn’t wait to show this to management. I told her to have a great night. Of course, she put the phone down so she wouldn’t record the things she’d say afterward. I told her to have a great night even after that. Then, the unexpected happened.
She just gave up and left. I didn’t get in trouble. I hope denying service to these Karens becomes a norm. They’re only this bad because we allow them to be. They’ve likely done it before and still got rewarded with apologies, rewards points, and free breakfasts. Service denial is a RIGHT and we should use it. Treat employees better.
54. Just After “Best Before”
I’ve been working in a five-star Hotel for about 3.5 years. There’s plenty of stuff going on that we pretend to do on the outside and in front of guests but we actually don’t. The most important is: “first in, first out.” You know, how you’re supposed to take out the things that expire first and not the newer drinks/foods to make sure you’re not wasting food? I don’t think anyone did that.
I am also pretty sure the kitchen staff even put meat on the buffet that was past its “best by” date.
55. Karen On Tour
This happened yesterday. I’m a bellman for a tourist hotel that has had a mask policy, but with the updated mandate, we now also have a health questionnaire that must be filled out upon check-in. A group of three had checked in and were wandering around the lobby, one with his nose out, one holding a mask against her face, and one without one at all.
Me: “Hey, folks, if we could wear those properly it would be very appreciated.” Karen: “But I’m staying in this hotel.” Me: “It’s a state mandate, I’m sorry.” Karen: “Well, the mandate says if you have a medical condition, you don’t have to wear one.” Me: “So you’re stating you have medical issues?” Karen: “Yes, they give me headaches, so I won’t be wearing one.”
Me: “I’m sorry for that inconvenience.” At this point, she got a huge, smug smile that let me know she thought she had won. Me: “You’re staying here? Did you check in yourself or did someone else check you in?” Karen: “I checked myself in, I’m not a child!” Me: “Well, then you remember signing the health questionnaire when you checked in? The one that asked if you had medical issues preventing mask-wearing and if you planned on wearing a mask?”
Karen: “I didn’t sign anything like that” Me: “What room are you in?” Karen: “I don’t have to tell you that, you’ll stalk me!” Me: “No, I just want it so I can find your questionnaire. If you’ll come to the front desk, please.” My supervisor now came to my side. Supervisor: “I have it here, I remember them checking in.”
“He slid it under the sneeze guard and I grabbed it.” Me: “Your name is Karen McDoobie? Is this your signature?” Karen: “I didn’t know that’s what that was! You expect me to read every little thing you idiots hand me?” Me: “Just the five-foot sign about masks and the check-in paperwork, which states that you have no medical issues and that you agree to our mask policy.”
Karen: “What can you do about it? Are you the manager?” Me: “No, I’m the bellman. But I have a duty to our guests and staff.” Karen: “I’m a guest, you idiot, I just told you that!” Me: “If you break hotel policy, that can change. So which is it? Are you a policy-abiding guest or do you have medical issues that will prevent your stay with us tonight?”
Karen: “Ridiculous! I would never have come if I’d known I’d be harassed like this. My town doesn’t have any mask policy and everyone is fine!” Me: So you’ll wear the mask? Karen: “I made these reservations last week! Everywhere else will be full!” Me: So you’re okay wearing the mask inside the hotel?” At that point, I was the one with a smug smile under my mask.
She grabbed the mask that was hanging on her wrist and held it on her face. Heading for the elevator, I could hear her mumble under her breath. As the doors closed, I saw her pull the mask away and wave it at me. At least she didn’t come out of her room all night, thank God!
56. Snakes In A Drain
I used to do maintenance at some hotels: it was pure grunt labor. But there was one part I never expected. I found that people, especially in the fancier hotels, will flush anything down a toilet. Towels, sheets, giant poops that no human could have possibly downloaded. Also pillows, paper, food, bottles, and just about everything else. It was a bit of a nightmare.
The best one ever was this. I got a call to snake a toilet in a room. The guy in the room was very twitchy. He tells me it is super important—wink, wink—I be careful to not damage said flushed items. “Gotcha,” I said. I somehow managed to fish out his bags of various powders and pills without breaking a single bag open.
He offered me some of his “products” as a tip, and when I declined, the guy just handed me a stack of $20s and ushered me out the door. It was an $1,800 tip. Oh, and by the way, tampons and pads do NOT get flushed down the toilet. And for everyone else, flushable wipes, aren’t.
57. The Polish Princess
I worked at a mom and pop bridal shop. We had a bride who was Polish, leading my boss to call her “the Polish princess.” She wasn’t my bride, but they picked a very bad consultant for her. This was made worse by the fact that this girl wanted stuff added to her dress that wasn’t done by the manufacturer, so we had to do it all in-house.
To give you an example, she wanted lights all around the bottom half of a dress that we had already spliced with two different dresses. Side note: my boss loved anything that meant money. Anyway, we spent months fixing and refitting this dress because she not only lost 45 pounds from her first time being measured, she also got a massive breast job.
Well, after finally fitting her into her gown, on the last week she decided the lights that took our poor 70-year-old seamstress two months to sew in looked tacky. She was crying and throwing herself at her mother in a tantrum, screaming in Polish. She then ripped the bottom of the dress and ultimately had to buy a dress from David’s Bridal because my boss finally got smart and kicked her out.
Just a mess. She made our seamstress cry!!!!! The witch.
58. Order Up
I bartend, and was working a day shift. We aren’t a restaurant known for takeout, but we allow it and are set up through the various service apps. We had an UberEATs order in the middle of lunch hour, and eventually had a driver brusquely walk in and act a little aggressive when announcing himself. I had the order ready, so I asked him to verify what he was picking up.
He raised his voice, “It’s for [name], what’s the name say?” We don’t get a name. I told him that I didn’t have one, so I just needed him to tell me what was on the order. I’ve seen them check this dozens of times. It’s usually not inconvenient. Again, louder. “What’s the name say!? Are those the wings!?” It was three items together. None were wings.
I repeated that I didn’t have a name and told him that we didn’t have an order for wings. He got angry. “Are those the wings!?” I explained again that they weren’t wings, showed him that I had three items together, and asked him to clarify what order he was looking for. At this point, he snapped, and started screaming at the top of his lungs.
“CAN I GET ANY SERVICE!?” The bar fell silent. I put the food down and told him to leave. He continued shouting. “FINE, I’LL LEAVE THEN!” He continued causing a scene as he made for the door. I told him he needed to get out immediately or I’d call the authorities. Then he spit on the floor, slammed the door open, and stormed off.
The bar stayed silent for a few more seconds before people returned to their meals. Not two minutes later, another driver showed up, verified the order, and left without issue in under a minute.
59. It’s Too Early For This
I’m a night auditor and a front desk associate at a hotel next to a mid-sized airport. I deal with lots of dumb stuff, but this one took the cake. At around 4 am, a mom and her kid were in the lobby waiting for their 4:30 am taxi. Since I’m a night auditor, most of my job involves me just being there to take care of guest requests, so I bring my gaming laptop with me every night.
Most of the time, I just play some low-key music or documentaries, but after 2 am, I do some gaming. When the mom showed up with the kid to check out, the kid noticed my laptop. He asked about it, and I told him the make and model. The kid was obviously a little envious, but otherwise really cool. They sat in the lobby when suddenly, the kid was also interested in our lobby computer.
After getting bored of it, he whispered something to the mom and she whispered something back. Suddenly, the kid ducked behind the counter and started trying to play on my laptop. I politely asked the kid to stop touching my laptop and to get back to his mom. Surprisingly, the kid obeyed but the mother freaked the heck out.
“I’m sitting here waiting for a taxi and you can’t let my child entertain himself on your laptop? I told him he can play on it until we leave.” “No, I can’t let him do that since guests aren’t allowed behind the desk and this is my own personal property.” “He’s just a child, let him have some fun while we wait for the taxi!” “I can’t allow non-employees behind the desk, since other guests’ personal information can be viewed. This is company policy for all involved, and I’m sorry the taxi is taking so long to get here.”
“Well, I told him he can play on it to keep busy because he needs something to do. What is he supposed to do now?” “Ma’am, I understand your child might be bored, but that’s not our responsibility. You’re welcome to change the channel on the television to find something suitable for him if you’d like.” “Why aren’t there any games on the computer in the lobby?”
The computer in the lobby is our “business center” and is stock standard, meaning it just has Windows 10 without anything extra installed. “That’s a business computer and it’s meant to be used by our customers for business purposes.” “Then you should install some games on it! If your hotel is going to host children, then it should entertain them as well!”
Thankfully, the taxi arrived as she finished her sentence, so she gathered her child and baggage before storming out. But the nightmare continued. Suddenly, the taxi driver was walking in with a receipt book, telling me we promised to pay for her taxi. This was false and completely against our policy. He easily accepted this, but the mom did not.
“YOUR WEBSITE SAYS YOU HAVE A HOTEL SHUTTLE AND IF IT’S NOT RUNNING, THEN I EXPECT YOU TO PAY FOR OUR TAXI!” “I’m sorry, but our shuttle only runs from 7 am to 9 pm. Outside of those hours, you are responsible for your own transportation.” “YOUR WEBSITE SAYS THERE’S A SHUTTLE TO THE AIRPORT! WE TOOK IT YESTERDAY AFTERNOON!”
“Yes, when our airport shuttle is operating. We list our shuttle hours on our website, I’m sorry for the confusion.” The mother then started swearing at me, calling me names, and threatening to call my manager for about three minutes before realizing I wouldn’t budge. That’s when she gave up and stormed back out to the taxi. Finally.
60. A Simple Choice
I worked night audit at a fancy hotel for awhile. A woman came to me, and told me she’d been assaulted by a guest. Of course, I called the authorities right away. They arrived and the dude got rousted from bed at 3 am to come to the lobby and talk to the officers. But there was something we didn’t know. She was an escort. The whole time she’s yelling at him.
The officers are trying to explain to the guy that his options are paying her or going to prison for. Meanwhile, I’m trying to use my best customer service skills to keep everyone quiet and gently hint to the dude where the ATM is. The best part was, this was night one of a week-long stay, so I got to see him every day after that.
61. Found In Translation
This happened years ago, but it still feels like it was yesterday. I was serving at a Steak ‘n Shake, and was about 70 lbs. bigger than I am now. I’m very white, with blonde hair, so you wouldn’t know by looking at me that I’m almost fluent in Spanish. As I was cleaning a table one night, the one right next to it was seated for me.
While wiping the dirty table, I heard the new table talking loudly about me in Spanish. When I understood their words, my blood ran cold. They were saying how big my butt was, how fat I was, and how they didn’t want to be served by someone so disgusting, not knowing that I 100% understood them. My initial reaction was anger and tears.
I wanted to give them bad service and not even try to be nice. But, I wanted to be the bigger person. I walked to the table and did my “Welcome to Steak ‘n Shake! My name is Brandi and I’m here to help you out” speech…but I said it all in Spanish. The look of shock and embarrassment on their faces gave me one of the greatest feelings ever. Then, I listed every burger, every milkshake flavor and every side item in Spanish.
For the entire meal, I spoke no English at all, and I gave them the kindest and most attentive service I’ve ever given anyone. The nicer I was, the more humiliated and ashamed they were. When one of them asked quietly if he could have some more water, I already had a tray in my hand with his water on it. They refused to speak Spanish to me, and would hardly even look at me.
When they left, they closed their ~$25 check, then left me a $50 bill under a plate for my tip. Such a glorious day! Everyone always asks why I didn’t spit in their food, give them bad service, or ring in their order wrong. Hurt people with kindness baby! That’s the way I do it.
62. A Modern Romeo And Juliet
I work at a hotel that does a huge amount of wedding business, and we had an engagement shower, with the plan being that the couple would be having the wedding with us as well. This involved the bride-to-be and, to an extent, her mother. We knew there were going to be issues because neither the bride or groom ever smiled.
The bride was always complaining about how the groom was “wishy-washy” with picking a date, while he was always silent. The mother of the bride was your stereotypical Brooklyn Jewish Mother and had her hand in EVERYTHING to make sure things were perfect for her little princess. Well, the engagement party starts, and everyone except for the couple seem to be having a great time.
Then, halfway through the party, we suddenly heard the girl scream at her fiancé “WE WILL NEVER HAVE A CHRISTMAS TREE IN MY HOUSE, SO YOU CAN GET OVER IT!!!!” And from there it devolved into a shouting match between the couple, who moved from the banquet room to the lobby so their “guests” couldn’t hear the argument. (Didn’t work. They heard everything).
Apparently, she was Jewish and he was Protestant and not once in their relationship had they discussed religion. They went at it on and off for two hours. She was screaming at the top of her lungs about how their (non-existent) children would be raised Jewish, and how his traditions didn’t matter. Her mother was standing at her side, nodding in agreement, and interjecting occasionally with a “that’s right” or “you tell him.”
The groom was pleading for her to at least compromise to let him at least invite his pastor from his hometown for the wedding, and said that their (non-existent) children could possibly do things with his parents for Christmas, even if they didn’t celebrate. The guests just kept partying, pretending nothing was happening, but you could see on all of their faces that they wanted to leave.
Only, well, they couldn’t since they would have to pass by the couple to get to the only exit. Only after two hours and the argument eventually devolving into her INSISTING her children would never see a Christmas tree in their whole lives, the groom finally dejectedly said, “Well then maybe this isn’t going to work.”
She threw her ring at him and said, I swear to god, “THEN WHY DID YOU LET ME MAKE YOU PROPOSE?!?!?!?!?!?!” She then changed her mind, picked up the ring, and said, “Whatever. I’m keeping this.” Then she stormed off. Her mother looked at her ex-potential-son-in-law, told him he was an idiot for letting her baby go, and went after her.
I’ve NEVER seen a banquet room clear out so fast. Within 15 minutes, everyone was gone and it was a ghost town. From the looks of it, everyone took their “gifts” with them, too. Worse still, it was the former bride’s family who had hosted and were staying at the hotel, so we spent the next two days “commiserating” with them about how awful the groom was as they moved their daughter out of his apartment.
Dude dodged a bullet.
63. Sticker Stickler
I was a valet in college at a very swanky resort. The members had a certain sticker on their car and the owners and partners of the resort had a black sticker—I didn’t know what it meant, I just knew they belonged. When a guy pulled up in a very nice Benz I said, “Welcome back (not knowing his name). He was so angry that I didn’t know who he was. He was a jerk to me but I couldn’t care less.
Moments later another younger guy pulled up to the valet and asked me what the guy said to me. I hesitantly said he was mad because I had no idea who he was. The young guy looked disappointed and said, “That’s my father and he is a jerk, don’t worry about him at all.” Then he gave me $20 to park his car and was extremely nice to every employee who ever interacted with him.
64. VIP Customer
So first of all, I work for a budget hotel chain that overuses the color purple a lot. I was working the front desk and at about 11 pm, a middle-aged lady came in. Now, she didn’t have a reservation and we have a general rule that if any night staff accept a reservation after the night shift starts, they would have to take responsibility for that customer should they cause any problems.
She seemed nice enough and we had a lot of empty rooms that night, so I thought sure, let’s give her a room. Her total came to about $75 and she got out her card to pay. I watched her put it into the machine, as a few of our guests sometimes miss the little slot or try to swipe. She saw me looking and said to me, “Oh, yes, this my Halifax Ultimate Reward card. It looks smart doesn’t it?”
Making idle conversation, I replied, “Yeah, I’ve got one of those as well.” To my surprise, the woman said, “Oh you must be mistaken—this is an exclusive card for valued customers of Halifax. They don’t give them to people like you.” This threw me for a loop. Feeling defensive—and admittedly, I may have been in the wrong here—I pulled my identical card out of my pocket to show her.
This woman flipped her lid. “YOU CAN’T HAVE THAT, THAT’S NOT YOURS. YOU’VE TAKEN THAT FROM A GUEST. FETCH YOUR MANAGER RIGHT NOW.” I was utterly bemused by this turn of events, so I went into the back office to get the night manager, who couldn’t quite grasp the weird situation I’d gotten myself into. He came out front and she went off at him.
Now, our night manager has been there for years, so he was used to this stuff. He just stood there while she ranted and raved until she was out of steam. Then he said, “I’m very sorry, but due to the attitude you have displayed towards my team, your reservation is canceled and you are no longer welcome in this hotel. Also, I feel like I should inform you that Halifax will give one of those cards to anyone who will pay $15 per month. You are not special. Please mind the revolving door on your way out.”
She gaped at us for a while and then left while muttering about complaining to head office. So yeah, definitely one of my weirder check-ins.
65. Course Correction
I’ve been in the industry pretty close to 10 years between restaurants, bars, coffee shops and back again. I’ve worked front and back of the house and felt pretty confident that I had seen it all and that nothing would truly shock me. That was until tonight. I work as a server in a local family restaurant. It’s a chain that is well known and we are in the parking lot of the largest shopping center for a two-hour drive in any direction.
So as you can imagine, our business can be heavily affected by the mall sales, etc. Tonight is a Tuesday evening. No weekly food specials so usually Monday-Wednesday are pretty slow compared to the rest of the week. Tonight was not. We got slammed. All the servers had their own section plus were rotating a closed section that became overflow.
They sat a table for me in the overflow section. I already had six other tables and got a solid triple seat to go with it. In other words, it took some time to get to the overflow table. I went over after probably close to 10 minutes later. At this point, I’ll note that anyone who has chosen to sit in the overflow section knows that the service in that area will be slower and they’ve chosen to sit there instead of waiting for a table in general dining.
So I go over with my best “I’m sorry” face and genuinely apologize to this table for keeping them waiting. I gestured to the restaurant and let them know it wasn’t a typical Tuesday night. This lady, with her two just shy of teenage boys beside her, laid into me. She yelled about how bad the service was and how it was unacceptable and that I should be fired.
She said if she wanted to be treated so poorly, she would have gone to the restaurant up the street to be forgotten about. Now I apologize many times, grab their drink and food orders at the same time, and let them know that I would plug in the food then bring the drinks over to cut down on their wait time. I walk over to the computer and a co-worker silently asks me if I was okay.
She heard this woman yelling at me from two sections away. That’s an easy 40 feet away. I wasn’t in the best state, but the night was busy and my armor was up. I knew I was doing my best and that’s what mattered. Food in, drinks poured, and I gird myself to go over to the table again. As I’m setting the drinks down, the lady said the absolute LAST thing I thought she would say.
“I think I might have come off as a bit of a witch before. It’s been a long day, I’m tired and I’m hungry and I took it out on you for no reason. You’re obviously busy and doing all you can and I’m very sorry.” To which I responded, “We’re good. I get pretty hangry sometimes too.” They waited, they ate, they were polite, she tipped mediocre and we all went about our lives.
I’ve had people yell at me, throw things, sometimes just be general jerks and I’ve even had people apologize on their behalf, but I’ve never had someone apologize about their own behavior.
66. Bad Mood Betsy
I was working the MORNING front desk shift and it was a cakewalk. As per usual, I had lots of calls but no weirdness. Then this witch walked in. Her: “I just made a reservation in the parking lot.” Me: “Alright, excellent! Welcome. How were your travels?” Her: “That’s none of your business.”Already, we were off to a bad start. Not only was she an hour early for check-in, but she was pulling out that attitude for no reason.
Thankfully, my housekeeping staff is stellar. I had a room ready. Cool, no sweat. Me: “Sorry about that. I’ll just take an ID—” She then proceeded to slam the ID on the counter. Great. But when I checked the system, her reservation hadn’t popped up in the system yet. Sometimes it takes a few minutes, but never too long. I grabbed her a bottle of water and a little snack, then let her know it shouldn’t take more than a moment.
When it hadn’t shown up after 3-4 minutes, I double-checked the system, thinking she may have checked in online. Then, I got a hunch and checked the arrivals for the next day. Bingo. Me: “I’ve found it! Unfortunately, the reservation is for tomorrow and I see that you booked through Smotels.com, so I am unable to alter your reservation. I’m happy to—”
What I was going to do was give her options. It was a one-night stay, so my initial thought was that a call to Smotels.com in order to change it so she wouldn’t be charged up the wazoo in fees for the transfer. Please keep in mind that it’s her mistake that she would like my help to fix. At that point, she was doubling down.
Her: “Fix it.” Me: “I’m so sorry, I am unable to alter reservations of this nature but I’m going to help—” Her: “You can help me but you won’t. You have my reservation right there, why are we even talking about this?” We went back and forth for a few seconds. She had no idea what she was talking about, and the more she realized that fact, the more she doubled down.
She finally realized that if I just made a new reservation for her for one night, she would be charged for the second night regardless. Her: “I want the second night. Make it happen.” So I made the reservation, instructed her to come down for fresh keys the next day under her Smotels.com reservation, and proceeded to write up an alert warning my fellow front desk warriors about the dragon lady in 302.
67. Not A Fan Of The Apple
As someone who works in customer service on Cape Cod, let me tell you: the worst guests are New Yorkers. They are the worst type of people to deal with. In general, they’re entitled, rude, snobbish and always in a hurry. The whole world isn’t like New York City, guys. Relax. Most of the time upstaters are nice and polite and just like Western Massachusetts people.
68. A Big Ask
This happened a couple of weeks ago at the very busy restaurant I work at. A woman came in saying she had some people from a jujitsu club wanting to come in for dinner and drinks, and do we take reservations. My manager asked for how many—and she said about 75, but maybe up to 100. My manager started laughing, but was soon stricken by horror.
She realized the woman was serious. We have a large restaurant, but a very small kitchen, and have a strict table of 20 cut off. When told about this, the woman still insisted that they were already here and pretty much refused no for an answer. We ended up allowing them to come in as it was around 8 pm and things were slowing down.
They sat outside in our big patio area, and we had two servers split the group. People were ordering at different times and many were just drinking, so the kitchen managed to do okay. The worst part was that about 30 of the people never went to their designated area, and instead crowded the bar and stood there. Us servers use this area to walk through and obviously get our drinks.
After several attempts at pushing our way through the crowd, we eventually gave up and accepted it as our reality. To get our bar drinks, we would go around to the bar side, every. darn. time. We have a long bar and only entry on each side, so this is hugely out of our way. This group stayed almost all night. The people were nice, but darn, how clueless are you!!!
I wasn’t the one serving them, I was just another server trying to keep the rest of the place under control. I heard MOST of them tipped, although they did all pay separately and we ran out of check presenters, obviously. Also, a few of them walked out on their tabs. Not on purpose, I’m sure they probably just wandered to meet their friends at the bar and forgot to close out.
I find this very rude no matter who it is. If you aren’t sure how to pay, ask the server or let them know you are leaving, moving, etc. Most of all, treat everyone with compassion! Server, customer, whatever. Treat cranky old people like they are your parents, because one day, they could be. Remember rude customers are JERKS, but also probably have a worse life than you do.
Know that some people don’t understand “restaurant etiquette” as we do, and if they did, maybe they would act differently. Remember your server is just a human being, not a servant, and being nice goes a long way.
69. Daddy’s Little Girl
I worked as a banquet server at a ritzy, riverfront hotel. People come from all over to have expensive overpriced weddings. So needless to say, many of our brides were Bridezillas to some extreme. Our summer season is very expensive. Usually, our local brides only get married there in the off-season to save some of their cash.
One local bride that I will forever remember, however, went absolutely crazy. Before the wedding even started, one groomsman left because he couldn’t stand her demands. We were all in the ballroom setting up as we normally do. At this particular wedding, the bride had a wedding planner who set the centerpieces, which were a pretty general country theme.
The bride storms in, literally has a temper tantrum that they are not right because the candle was supposed to be on the left and not the right. We fix it no problem even though it was not us but her wedding planner who set them. Now, you’d think that would be all…but no. One of her bridesmaids lost her bouquet right before the ceremony.
Instead of troubleshooting, she completely berates and humiliates her bridesmaid. Then starts stomping her feet and saying, “Dadddddyyyyy” like a two-year-old. This was over and over again. To her, every little detail was wrong in some way, shape, or form. Needless to say, I was so glad I wasn’t responsible for the bride and groom’s table that day.
70. Total Meltdown
I saw a public freak out recently that reminded me of something that happened when I was a hostess in my early 20s at a steak house. A family of four came in, and when I sat them, the mom (I’ll call her Karen) wanted to move to an area where all the tables were full. I told her she could wait back up front and we’d seat her when one of the tables opened.
She insisted on standing right by the bus station so she had a view of the people sitting in her desired area. The four of them were in the way of guests and servers but Karen did not notice, she was too busy staring daggers at people eating. I went to the manager, who tried to move her to no avail. Finally, we just let them stay because we noticed a couple in a booth packaging up their food.
I checked in a few minutes later to see if that table had left yet and was dismayed to see they had ordered dessert and coffee. Karen was still standing there, watching them. The kids were bored and running up and down the wheelchair ramp. I asked Karen again to move back down to the waiting area as she was blocking servers and her kids were an accident waiting to happen.
She loudly asked when her table would be ready and pointed right at the couple sipping their coffee. Knowing we were talking about them, the couple looked at us and smiled. A disturbing realization dawned on me. It hit me then that they were not leaving on purpose. Oh dear God. Karen realized it as well, because she got very angry.
She yelled that they were keeping her booth from her and we should kick them out. I told her we would not ask anyone to leave until they were ready. Then I watched in horror as the woman approached the couple. Karen: “You’re done here, this is my table now. Pay the bill and go.” Couple (Smiling sweetly): “We just got our coffee and dessert.”
Karen: “THEN TAKE IT TO GO!! WE ARE HUNGRY AND YOU’RE IN OUR BOOTH.” Couple: “This is our booth. It’s not yours until we leave.” Karen raged insults at them until the manager came rushing up to help. He tried to intervene but could not be heard over her screaming about her starving children. The couple kept their cool the whole time, nibbling their dessert and stirring their coffee at a sloth’s speed.
Finally, the manager had enough and told the woman to go. She was utterly FLOORED that we were asking her to go and not the couple. Then she escalated it. She picked up an empty dessert plate from their table and chucked it across the room, where it hit a wall and smashed into pieces. The manager screamed for someone to 9-1-1, since this was before everyone had cell phones.
I remember trying to hide my smile from the people around me. What adult acts like this? This woman was in her 40s! There were a ton of open booths too, just not in that area. Then Karen’s husband appeared, grabbed her by the sleeve, and started pulling. She let him lead her toward the front door as she continued to yell insults at us.
She called the manager a loser and mocked his career choice. She told me I was “a plain nothing going nowhere” and “worthless,” and when they’d gone, I went into the back for a while to hide. I needed to get away from people. When I returned, the server of the couple ran up to me. He said, “That couple left but they wanted to talk to you.”
Apparently, they felt so bad about how that woman acted. They saw her watching them and she was being so rude, so they decided to take their time to mess with her. They didn’t think she’d do that! They waited a few minutes to talk, but they thought I went home and asked the server to give me something as an apology.
The server then handed me a $100 bill. It was a bad night but it kind of made me feel better. It’s not every day a customer acknowledges when they’ve made your life miserable. If the couple had just left, none of that would have happened. Nothing they did hurt me, of course, but the insults from Karen sure did. Thankfully, Karen was never seen again.
It’s not easy to be a young kid making $5 an hour and being berated by people who think they’re better than you.
71. Tailor-Made For Each Other
I work at David’s Bridal. Most of the times…it’s not the bride. It’s a mother of the bride or maid of honor. I work in alterations, and believe me, it takes more than one appointment to get things perfect. So one day, this bride comes in for her second appointment for us to do any adjustments. Predictably, she needed a couple of things adjusted.
Her mother told me I ruined her daughter’s marriage. Not wedding…but marriage. All I could think was that if needing to adjust something on your dress and having to come back for one more appointment makes you think someone ruined your perfect life with someone…well…good luck to her groom. I don’t want to be near those two.
72. Microwave Surgeon Virgin
I was working at a five-star hotel in maintenance and a surgeon complained at the front desk that the microwave in his room wasn’t working. I went up to check on it and he showed me how it wouldn’t turn on. He opened the door, put his coffee in, set the time and hit go. “See,” he said. “Nothing.” The guy hadn’t shut the door.
They obviously work long days but jeez, have you never used a microwave before?
73. Party Of Eight
Oh man…this group. I have never turned to a manager before and said, “I’m done, I’m not going back over there.” But I did last night. Yesterday was a particularly slow Monday. I didn’t have any tables until 5:30. This table of two sat in my section and wanted happy hour, which is for high-tops only of course, so I moved them to the right section.
The hostesses were able to get me a new table immediately, and it was a group of eight people. Six women, I’m putting money on past sorority sisters, and two boys around eight years old. I should have just taken the two happy hour people and taken the wrath from management, honestly. The table of eight is immediately obnoxiously loud, and it’s pretty much just seat #3 causing it.
While the other women were just raising their voices, #3 was actually yelling as if she had earplugs in. They also have a birthday at the table, “Oh my gaaaawd, girls!! Let’s sing!! Every time someone mentions the birthday we HAVE to sing!: And they did. They sung/screamed happy birthday no less than five times, one for every round of drinks.
By the time the appetizers came out, my manager had already walked up to them about a noise complaint from a table across the restaurant. Seat #3, a grown adult, goes to the bathroom, but stops halfway and asks me, “Wait, do I need a mask??” “Yes, ma’am, you do when you’re traveling around the restaurant.” “Are you sure??” “…Yes, ma’am.” “Like, really sure??”
This conversation happened multiple times with seat #3 and our other staff members. She would stop a staff member every time she ran to her car, went to the bathroom, checked out the restaurant, ran after a kid, and ask, “Are you sure I gotta wear a mask?” And of course, then never wear it. My work doesn’t allow staff to enforce the mask policy, so I can’t do anything but answer her questions and maintain a biiiiig distance.
Anyway, the first round of drinks comes out. Seat #2 keeps drinking Seat #1’s cocktail, even though she has her own margarita to work on. Gets a good bit of the way through her friend’s drink, turns to her with a sour face, and goes, “You like that?” Seat #1 says, “I don’t know…” and she finally gets to try her half-gone drink.
She says yeah, she likes it. #2 goes, “Are you sure??” Seat #1 says… “I don’t know…” So, now seat #2 sends back a drink that’s not even hers, and has me get seat #1 a new drink. That new drink never got touched. I think she actually really liked the first one, but gave into some bizarre peer pressure. Thankfully, this was the only issue I ever had with seats #1 and #2. Otherwise, they were great. But I wasn’t out of the woods.
Appetizers get dropped. Kids’ food gets dropped. I’m standing there taking the ladies’ orders, and I’m watching the boys who are to my left and in front of me. One of the boys is enjoying his first ever Shirley Temple. I was so happy to give it to him, y’all. I shoved so many cherries in that kid’s cup. He’s sitting there chugging his daily requirement of sugar, when he sort of sits up while still drinking, and turns towards me.
He pulls the straw from the cup with liquid still in the straw, and his mouth was so full his cheeks were bulging. He turned towards me, and SPIT his drink through the straw down my legs. I have never…EVER…been spit on. What the actual?! I let out a bewildered, “Excuse me?!” as my legs are dripping Shirley Temple and 8-year-old saliva.
The mom? LAUGHS. And then it got worse. She even praises him! “Good one, Dom!!” I walk away now. Thankfully I had everyone’s orders when it happened. I clean up and come back out, head to a different table, and now seat #3 is rushing me from across the restaurant, absolutely hauling her butt, without a mask on of course.
She catches up to me, grabs my arm, and turns me around. Proceeds to get in my face, to the point where our breasts are physically touching, and goes, “We have a birthday at the table…do you guys do anything for that?? Like sing maybe? Ooh! Or cake! Bring out a cake! Do you have a chocolate one and candles?!” The entire time she’s going on about this request, I’m backing up slowly.
She’s following me step for step. I have backed up so far that I have now backed up into another table that actually has people eating at it, and she is still breast-to-breast with me going on about cake and singing. I can smell the drinks on her breath. Finally, I get her happy with a slice of Baked Alaska for the table for free, and she finally screws off.
The table I backed into wouldn’t let me apologize for being on top of them practically, and it actually turned out to be the table that complained about the noise in the beginning! They were 100% on my side after getting the full experience just now with guest #3, and would continue to be on my side and explain to the managers what was going on.
I hate that this one table ruined their meal, since they were really such nice ladies whose experience was ruined by this terrible group. So, I bring out dessert. Baked Alaska, set it on fire, ooh ahh. That dessert didn’t stand a chance, it was gone. I go back over to make sure no one wants anything else, and seat #3 goes, “Why did the hostess yell at us earlier?”
Me: “Oh…Well, that was the manager. She was informing you that you have a noise complaint against your party.” 3: “Who complained? Tell me who complained, I’ll take care of it.” Me: “Yeah… I can’t release that information.” 3: “You can’t? Uh okay. Well, can you tell the woman who came over here to screw off?” Me: …“Yeah, that’s my manager, I can’t do that either.” Her response made my face go red.
Lady #3: “Okay, well you can just screw off then.” Me: “Okay!!” I walked right up to my manager and asked her to cash them out and handle whatever they had left, since I was done. We had four different managers in the building that day, and all four had been watching the table since the noise complaint before appetizers, so she didn’t ask any questions from me and just printed the check for them and walked over.
She said, “Hey everyone. Here’s your check, it’s time for you to head on out of here.” Seat #2, who is actually a really nice lady and doesn’t deserve to be roped in with her awful friends but you should choose your friends better, starts apologizing for everyone’s behavior. Manager just says, “It’s time to go.” She just keeps repeating it until #2 paid for the entire check ($304 after discounts) and they left. Oh, but the disturbing climax is around the corner.
I go with my bussers and start bussing this absolutely wrecked table. One of the bussers reaches under the table and grabs this aqua blue pile of fabric. He’s turning it this way and that, trying to figure out how you’d wear that sort of face mask, when he spots the skid marks…yes. My table left their used panties under my table. And guess who’s seat they were by? Lucky #3!
What the actual heck, y’all. I just can’t believe that actually happened last night.
74. It’s A Doggone Shame
I work for a wedding venue, and the couple wanted to bring their dogs for the ceremony. The day of the wedding, everyone working has a list of jobs to do to get ready for the big day. All of my fellow employees are setting up everything, so the couple’s families can get ready and relax. We set out the chairs, decorations, flowers, tables, silverware, the dining room, the Arbor, EVERYTHING!!
The only thing they had to do was hold onto the dogs. Spoiler: They didn’t. We finished everything on the inside in the morning, and we were almost done finishing everything outside, when we all hear a massive crash on the inside of our massive event room. It was the dogs. One had started with the wedding cake and accompanying artsy cupcakes.
The other moved into (on top of) the beverages tables where they broke around 80 flutes, 60 stemless glasses, and around 120ish glasses, along with four crystal punch bowls and all the accompanying liquids. And they did it all within a few seconds. Needless to say, the bride and groom’s “handler” was their 15-year-old nephew.
This boy, in his eternal wisdom, thought that he would let them run around a bit before the wedding. When the bride walked out of the changing rooms and down the hall to see the noise, she was not happy at the sight of the horrors that took place. She lost her mind, blaming us for everything, screaming, “Why did you let the dogs into the room?” etc etc.
She said she didn’t care how, but to get this all ready before the reception or she would sue us for all we were worth. We took the “I don’t care how” to heart. We called every business within a 10-mile radius and bought, borrowed, bartered, and did everything we could. All the glasses, all the wine, the drinks. I was in charge of driving the boss’s car to the nearest bakery and forcing the bakery to make a serviceable wedding cake with everything they had.
I was a little late on bringing the cake back, but everything else had been cleaned, reset, and back to its former glory before the wedding ceremony was over. After the night was over and the bride and groom left, we gave everything back we borrowed, boxed up what we bought, and started shelling out the favors. We tallied up all the damages the dogs had caused and what the wedding cost.
It was in the five-digit range. The couple was understandably angry at the bill, so they did indeed sue…they lost. And to my knowledge, they are still leaving 1-star reviews on every rating website out there for us.
75. Showing His True Colors
At the time, most of the guests at our hotel were businessmen. The guys from this particular company had been staying at our hotel for a while, and I got along very well with a few of them, including the person I later found out was the owner. One evening, probably around 5 or 6 after my managers had left, three guys from that company came down and wanted to buy drinks and snacks.
I sold the first two guys their drinks and snacks no problem. The third guy, however—I can’t remember exactly what he said, but it made me mad, and I could tell he was already tipsy, so I refused to sell to him. Well, he did not like this, and he called me all sorts of names and just started yelling at me. I told him to go back to his room, but he wasn’t leaving.
Luckily, his two co-workers were still around and they took him out of the lobby. He went back to his room and it was over, or so I thought. I was so, so wrong. I got a call from his manager, who I knew, asking what had happened. I guess one of his co-workers called and told him what had happened. I explained the situation and told him that he was not allowed in the lobby if he was going to be disrespectful.
His manager apologized and said he would get him on a new assignment. He also told me if anything to call him if anything else happened. Alright, that sounded good to me. About 30 minutes later, the dude came back down yelling at me about how his manager called him and was making him leave. He then pulled out his phone and started to record me, on Facebook Live, saying how I wouldn’t sell to him.
He then went into the shop, and on video, took drinks from the cooler. He told me he was going to get me fired and just started screaming at me again. Unfortunately, his co-workers weren’t in the lobby, so all I could do was tell him to go back to his room. He eventually did. I looked up the guest’s reservation and called the number on file for the manager I had talked to earlier to tell him what happened.
I ended up getting sent to the voice mail for who I thought was his other manager. I knew him as well. I left a message, explaining what happened and he called me back almost immediately. He apologized. Since it was late, he couldn’t get him a flight that night to leave; but he had a flight first thing in the morning. I then found out that this manager was actually the owner of the company.
A few days went by and I got another phone call—this time, it was from the HR team. I explained the situation and they apologized. I then got a call from their risk management team, and they apologized. The next time I was at work, all of the managers, the owner, and the employees came and apologized. The guy got fired, and every person in the company had to take a harassment class.
76. Get A Room
I worked management at a resort in a popular tourist town. When weddings are booked at our venue with the event coordinator, we can hold a certain number of rooms for guests attending. A manager was always required to check in the bridal couple, and I had been given a heads up by the coordinator that this particular bride was a Bridezilla.
First, they wanted a room on the highest floor and closer to the beach. Thing is, they were already booked into the Honeymoon Suite, which was on the third floor with ocean views. Nope, she wanted higher and closer. Had an absolute meltdown at the front desk when I explained there was nothing higher…or closer. I mean, really.
A colleague of mine ran for the event coordinator when the bride started screaming at me and her husband-to-be. The husband was very apologetic and trying to calm her down. Eventually, she was placated and sent off with keys, but fewer than 30 minutes later she was back and demanding we empty the rooms next to and below her.
Honey, those rooms cost $640 a night and we are fully booked! I was lucky enough to not be working the night of the wedding, but I heard all about her screaming at the wait staff, kicking the band out for playing a song she didn’t like, and the screaming match she got into with her mother-in-law. What a peach! All counted up, the wedding was about $40,000 and she made everyone miserable.
The groom left our front desk staff a big tip to apologize for her behavior.
77. The Water Works
I own a gift shop and I also sell flowers. It’s in a small hospital so we don’t do too many flowers. Usually, it’s just small arrangements because our customers generally don’t want to spend over 20 bucks. One day, one of the women who works at the hospital asked us if we would make a bridal bouquet for her future daughter-in-law.
We decided we would do it just for her. We made this beautiful bouquet exactly how she wanted it, and even added some extra embellishments. She picked it up the day before the wedding and I told her to just gently spray water from a spray bottle on it to keep it hydrated. I even demonstrated how to do it. The mother-in-law came in the next Monday and told me something awful.
Apparently, the night before the wedding the bride had literally sat the bouquet in the sink and drenched it with water which obviously ruined it. The bride wanted to demand a refund but the mother-in-law told her no because it was her own fault. So yeah, after that one I probably won’t work with brides again. Too high strung.
78. It’s On Me
On my very first shift as a bartender, a beautiful woman in her mid-20s came into the bar. It was a regular Saturday night, so the place was crowded, but not packed. She had five female friends with her, but she was clearly the self-proclaimed ringleader. At one point, they come up to me at the bar counter and she makes a big show about how she’s going to buy them all mojitos.
These drinks run at about $13 apiece. I tell her it will take me a few minutes to get the six drinks ready and she’s fine with that. After a couple of minutes, she gets up to go to the restroom, I assume. I get the drinks ready and start wondering what the heck is taking her so long. I have a fellow bartender check up on her in the restroom, as I figure she’s either throwing up or getting it on there. Well, I wasn’t completely wrong in either of those assumptions.
The other bartender came back and says that she WAS throwing up, but then found some dude in there who was chatting her up. The other bartender informed her that she was needed back at the bar. A few minutes go by, and she and Mr. Knight in Shining Armor grab two seats at the bar. I walk up to them and the dude tries to order a drink for himself and water for her.
I inquire about where she wants the six mojitos placed and this is how it plays out: Stupid girl: “Those aren’t for me. I’m too gone to have more drinks” Me: “But you ordered them. And here they are.” Stupid girl: “But I don’t want them.” Me: “That not really the issue. I made them, so now you’ve gotta pay for them.” Stupid girl: “But I’ve been in the restroom the whole time, so I couldn’t have ordered them.”
Me: “Actually, you ordered them with me at the bar 15 minutes ago, before you stepped into the restroom.” Knight in Shining Armor: “I was with her the whole time and SHE DID NOT ORDER THOSE DRINKS.” Stupid girl looks infatuated with Knight in Shining Armor. It’s clear that they’ve just met and this dude is thinking that she’ll be an easy score if he just huffs and puffs a bit for her, putting me in my place.
Me: “Well, you’ve only just met her in the restroom JUST NOW, and she ordered those drinks BEFORE she went in there.” As a side note, some of her girlfriends, who had been hanging around the sides of the bar area waiting for the drinks, suddenly disappeared into the adjoining rooms. They clearly didn’t want to be a part of the mess.
Stupid girl: “But none of my friends are here to drink them.” Me: “It doesn’t matter. You ordered them, I made them, and now they need to be paid for.” Knight in Shining Armor: “She clearly doesn’t need more drinks, and this is your fault for serving them to her in the first place!” He’s getting angry. Me: “She was fine when she ordered them.”
Knight in Shining Armor: “But she shouldn’t have to pay for them.” Me: (having had enough) “Fine, then you can pay for them. That’ll be 78 dollars.” Dude was actually taking out his wallet until he heard the amount. Then he promptly looked at her, clearly assessing whether she was worth it. He decides no, not happening.
He puts his wallet back in his back pocket, and now it’s really awkward. She’s looking down at her glass of water, he’s looking for a way out of this situation, and I’m just standing there staring daggers at the both of them. Me: (directed at stupid girl) “If you don’t pay, we’re going to have trouble.” The stupid girl is now looking around for someone to save her.
Everybody’s looking away, including Knight in Shining Armor. Me: “So what’s it gonna be?” The stupid girl reluctantly and very slowly takes her credit card out and pays, all the while looking around for pity or someone to step in and pay. I hand her the drinks and tell her very firmly: “DO NOT DO THIS AGAIN.” We’re a small bar in a local town, you can be darn sure we gave her stern looks and asked for humiliating confirmation every time she visited after that.
79. I’m All Ears
I’m a valet. I was on the drive greeting cars as I usually did on any shift. A group of ladies and kids came in with an SUV and insisted on parking in the valet lot. After I didn’t let them park there, they started talking about me amongst themselves in Arabic. Little did they know that I spoke fluent Arabic, so when she roasted me, I understood everything.
She then asked in English, “So, where can I park sir?” So I gave her instructions to the parking garage in Arabic. The whole car went silent, the mothers dropped their phones, and she whispered sorry and drove off. Their reactions were priceless.
80. A Bull In A China Shop
Do Groomzillas count? I used to work as a bridal registry consultant for a big department store. I had several nightmare couples and family members, but I always think of this one guy. The bride was pleasant enough and very polite. She expressed great excitement when discussing the plans for the wedding, while the groom just seemed bored.
She was very excited to pick out fine china—and that’s when the groom snapped. He yelled at her and called her an idiot, then told her that there was no need for expensive things like that. He said they would never use them, while she insisted that she would find reasons to use them so they wouldn’t go to waste. She also said that her family insisted on her picking a pattern and they would all chip in to get the set.
She was nice enough and patient enough with this jerk that she even kept asking him what he liked. Well, the groom didn’t like anything and kept yelling at her, telling her that she was “wasting his time” and that she was stupid. It was getting really uncomfortable at that point. I tried to intervene as much as I could, but this groom was complete scum.
Eventually, he stormed off and I tried to keep everything light-hearted and happy for the bride. I hope she didn’t go through with that wedding.
81. No Show
We close at 8 pm on Sundays. It was 7:45 pm. Phone call: “Hey, I see it says you guys close at 8 but if we have 10-12 people, could you stay open for us?” Me: “I’ll have to ask the chef for you, one second.” I know I should have just said HECK NO, but I have to run everything by the chef, who is also the owner. He tells me to tell them yes—ugh.
Me: “Yeah, no problem.” Then they say, “Okay, we should be there around 8:30.” Me: “…Okay” So I put a bunch of freaking tables together and pour all their waters and put menus on their tables. 8:45 pm, they call back and tell us they aren’t coming after all. FIRST OFF, WHO THE HECK CALLS A RESTAURANT AND ASKS THEM TO STAY OPEN FOR THEM? Then you have the audacity to cancel? 15 minutes late? The worst.
82. Privileged Information
I work at a small hotel in a major city. This happened on a Friday night, right before my shift was about to end. I had all my check-ins done and I was ready to get out…but then the phone rang. Me: “Hi, how can I help you?” Phone: “Ugh, hi, yeah—can you tell me if you have a guest checking in under the name of Mr. So and So?”
Phone: “So you’re actually telling me that when you got hired you were told that you’re not allowed to tell someone that?” Me: “Um, yeah, actually; as well as at the other two 5-star hotels and the cruise ship that I worked for.” Phone: “Well, that’s ridiculous. Can I speak to your supervisor?” Me: “Unfortunately, we don’t have a supervisor present at the moment. My general manager will be back Monday morning at 8 am.”
Phone: “Okay and what is your name? Do you have an employee number?” I told them my name, but I didn’t have an employee number. Phone: “And your last name? What do you look like?” Me: “Excuse me…?” Phone: “Well, if you don’t have an employee number, how will I explain to your manager who I spoke to?” Me: “I’m the only one here with my first name, so please feel free to call my manager on Monday morning after 8 am and tell her you spoke to me.” Click.
And he never called. Must have realized that I was, in fact, right.
83. Thank You, Next
I work in a rich, very conservative part of town, so sometimes we get super conservative people in. I generally ignore the political attire that you see a few times a week, because as long as they respect me, I don’t care. By the way, I also have buzzed hair, so I’m used to comments about being feminine with short hair (usually positive), and I think this is why one customer started this conversation with me today:
Customer: Are you a homosexual? Me: Excuse me? C: I asked if you were a homosexual. M: Why do you ask? C: I don’t want to be served by a lesbian. M: (after a stunned silence to make sure I just heard what I just heard) Well, then I guess you can go ahead and leave because no one here wants to serve you. And I immediately walked away to get the manager, who proceeded to ask them to leave because, well, you know.
I went outside for a few minutes to calm down, because I’ve never had this type of hatred spewed directly to me, face-to-face like this before.
84. Don’t Bug Me
My brother and sister-in-law used to own a bakery, and wedding cakes were their primary moneymaker. If a couple had an outdoor wedding, we would always warn them that the cake needed a net around it to protect it from bugs. Most couples understood it and usually had a net around it, or else didn’t care. So anyway, this one bride wanted an extravagant wedding cake.
The middle section was a four-tier cake—two tiers on the bottom pillars with columns and two tiers on the top. Then she wanted four other sets of a four-tier cake that had stairs connecting the middle section. On the stairs were small dolls that were supposed to resemble the bridesmaids and groomsmen. Each cake was also a different flavor as well.
Oh but we’re not done yet. Then on the bottom, a waterfall. In short, this cake was ugly. The reception was also close to a creek, so that means lots of bugs. We strongly urged her to use a net around it. She declined. We also made her sign a waiver excluding us from any liability after the cake was dropped off. We have this wedding as our last drop-off as it was hot and we didn’t want the frosting to melt by sitting in the hot sun all day.
We also freeze the cakes a day or two before so by the time it’s ready to cut, the cake is de-thawed but the frosting is still intact. This is how it went downhill. We arrive to start assembling the cake and I noticed little tiny gnats already in the cake. We did a quick fix to eliminate the problem but alert the people there (again) that they needed something to protect the cake.
Again, by time it’s ready to serve, it will be covered in bugs. We show them the problem, but they didn’t seem to care. So whatever, she signed the waiver, we finished and left. Well, my sister-in-law gets a phone call around 8 pm that night with an angry bride. She wanted us to make and redecorate the exact cake and bring it to her within an hour.
There is no way in heck we would or could do that. Since I am better at customer service than my brother and his wife, she handed me the phone and I explained to the bride, “I feel your frustration in the matter, however, you were informed of the dangers of setting up a cake outside, in the country, with no protection.”
I asked her if she had any more questions. She threw a big humph and hung up on me.
85. Slow Clap
I was checking in this girl who was in town for business and as usual, her company was paying for her stay. This lady was already kind of impolite, but I didn’t sweat it. It was 9 o’clock and she had bags under her eyes, so she probably was exhausted from her travels. I made small talk, which she barely partook in, but she did mention that she had driven for hours from the next major city over because of a sudden transfer.
Bingo. Her company is moving her all over the place on short notice. I asked her what her method of pay would be and immediately got an alert that the company’s card on file had expired. I had to break the news. “I’m so sorry ma’am, but the card on file that we were given is expired. Is there any way you can get a hold of them and maybe we can work something out? I just need a valid card.”
That did it. She broke. She turned around, paused, and started clapping. She clapped loudly and proudly. She clapped all the way out of the lobby. I paused for a moment and thought if I should be angry. But, you know what…no. She released her anger in a physical manner, rather than directing it at me or anyone else. You let that anger out, girl. You do you.
86. A Little To The Left
I used to cater wedding receptions in college. This momzilla shows up to the reception hall about 30 minutes before everyone is due to arrive. She thinks that one of the tables is too close to another table, and asks that we move it about five inches. Okay. But then of course all the OTHER tables are now too close, and she insists that we move every single table in the venue over five inches.
All 16 of them. We manage to scurry and move them, but you know what happens when you move 16 tables? Every single chair doesn’t match the place setting now. We manage to move every single chair (over 160) right before the first guests arrive, never mind that it’s taken up time we should have been prepping for guests by filling water pitchers, etc. and we’re now behind.
Crazy mom THEN insists that every fork is slightly too close to every plate. We now politely tell her we won’t be moving 160 forks—and she has a fit. Luckily, we stood our ground, and that mother did not get what she wanted that day.
87. Come Closer, Little Girl
As I pulled up to work last night, I saw the girl who worked the swing shift being led to our second building by a very creepy-looking dude. She was young and petite and he had the look of a spider who had just caught himself a nice, juicy fly. Her eyes were wide with fear and she kept trying to make excuses, but he was insistent that he couldn’t get into his room and needed her to help him.
Reading the situation, even though I was still in my motorcycle gear and not yet technically in uniform, I told her that I’d escort him down. He still insisted that she do it, though he couldn’t give a good reason why. I said fine, but I stayed right behind them. At one point, he actually put his hand on her lower back and I politely but firmly asked him not to touch our employees.
He took his hand off of her, but he was obviously not happy about my presence. We finally got to his door and he made a half-baked attempt to use his key card as if to prove he wasn’t lying about not being able to get in. I could tell he was about to ask her to do it for him, so I stepped in and said, “Allow me, sir.” I took the card from him and what do you know—the door unlocked on my first try.
He gave me a half-hearted “Thanks, buddy.” Then he went into his room, slamming the door behind him. She thanked me and told me he’d been creeping her out for a while. Maybe I was reading too much into the situation, but I shudder to think what might have happened if I’d shown up just a couple of minutes later. I considered calling the authorities but I figured they couldn’t really do anything because they can’t detain someone for being a creep.
88. Runaway Bride
I’m not a wedding shop worker, but I do have a pretty incredible Bridezilla story. My sister and I were asked to be bridesmaids by a mutual acquaintance. We both thought it was odd that she asked both of us and not someone closer to her, but either way, we planned a wonderful weekend in a resort town three hours away for her bachelorette party with the other two bridesmaids, who were her friends.
She started the weekend pouty and on her phone for most of the time. All in all, she seemed totally ungrateful for the good time we were trying to give her. Things got better when we broke out the hard stuff in our hotel room later. Then we saw a band at a bar, and there were other bridal parties there. She was fine for a while, dancing and having fun, until one of the other bridal parties sat down near us and started getting more attention.
They were all young cute girls and the band was flirting with them, guys were asking the bride to dance…and all of a sudden my bride sat down and began furiously texting on her phone. We asked what was wrong, and she would only say that she wasn’t having fun anymore and wanted to go home. We were all like, “Okay, let’s call a cab and go back to the hotel.”
And she was like, “No, I want to go HOME.” Which was three hours away. We were all drinking, so no one could drive her home. She storms out of the bar and begins calling people who none of us know to come and pick up her in the middle of the night because her fiancé isn’t answering his phone. She steadfastly refuses to get a cab; she says she’s going to stand in the parking lot for hours until someone picks her up.
She even made us miss a bus that could have driven us to the hotel for free because she simply refused to move. That was what made me snap. I screamed at her. I’ve never in my adult life screamed at another adult like that. I told her that she was going to get in a car and go back to the hotel, because we weren’t going to leave her out here all alone and we certainly weren’t going to stand in a bar parking lot for hours while she waited for someone to pick her up.
And she finally relented. We got into a cab and got back to the hotel. Bride is still texting, not speaking to any of us now because I yelled at her. When we got to the hotel, she refused to come inside. She stood in that awkward space between the two double doors and refused to move again. Myself and one of her friends went up to the room to pack her stuff, while my sister and the other friend stayed downstairs to make sure she didn’t bolt on us or something.
She finally got a hold of her fiancé, who agreed to drive down and fetch her. My sister said that when Bridezilla finally decided to talk, she witched about how she was mad at US because “we hadn’t helped her enough.” I was livid. We’d gone to wedding expos with her, helped her pick out her dress, picked out our dresses, and we’d planned an entire weekend for her bachelorette party.
We spent hundreds of dollars to make her happy, but that wasn’t good enough for her. And while I was up in the hotel room gathering her stuff with her other friend, I learned the whole truth. She’s been previously married, had multiple foreclosures and court dates because of unpaid debts, and had two children she no longer had custody of—all things I had no idea about even though I’d known her for years.
I’m not sure if her fiancé knew it either! When her fiancé did arrive, she didn’t even greet or thank him. She just blew right past him and sat in his car. Her behavior was like a petulant teenager, and this woman was in her late 30s. It was unbelievable. But in the end, my sister and I bonded with the other two bridesmaids over the tumultuous situation, and now we’re friends. And the wedding was astoundingly uneventful. So I guess I’m happy with that!
89. It’s Quittin’ Time
I used to be a property manager at a major motel chain in the US. The general manager was a company rock star who spent a lot of time helping other properties, so I was the acting GM a lot (like I was that night). This was a 96 room property—a four-building box layout with a swimming pool in the center. We had a lot of construction contracts.
These were easy guests who worked all day, came back, played cards and drank, and turned in early. I was at home when my phone rang at 3 am. It was Josh, the night auditor. Josh was reliable, but he drank a lot every week and was typically loopy. Josh: “Hey man, you probably want to come down here. Someone just drove a truck into the swimming pool.”
Me: “That’s…impossible. It’s fenced in.” Josh: “Dude, they crashed through it.” Me: “How could a truck even get in the courtyard?” Josh: “They drove through the gap between buildings two and three.” I started visualizing the scene—Building #2 is on a hill above one and three, and there’s a gap there. Someone determined enough could point a truck downhill, put the pedal down, and build up the momentum to crash the chain link and go into the pool. So yeah, it was possible.
Me: “Josh, you had better not be screwing with me.” Spoiler alert: Josh wasn’t screwing with me. I got to the motel and there was a construction company pick-up truck nose down in the swimming pool and its tailgate in the air. I had to blow up the phones at corporate, get the authorities out, start documenting everything, photographing everything, deal with the other guests, etc. until way past dawn.
It turned out, two of the crew members had been drinking and decided to quit in the most spectacular way they could think of. We even had an eyewitness. She told the officers that one guy drove and the other guy rode standing up in the flatbed, holding on to the top of the cab and yee-hawing all the way down the hill. The construction company did the repairs themselves.
90. A Cake Walk
I once worked in a bakery, and we had this bride freak out that her cake wasn’t right, and she proceeded to smash it to bits with her fist. Well, she smashed the wrong cake. Like what the heck. Anyways, the authorities allowed her to wash her hands before placing her in handcuffs. I felt bad for the future husband and the couple that ordered said cake. People are cray cray.
91. No Show, All Idiot
I work at a big name hotel in a beach town. In the summer, our rates skyrocket to almost $300 a night and we are usually sold out. Someone booked two rooms for a long weekend and decided not to show up. Our no-show policy is pretty standard—a night’s cost for each room booked. So this gentleman was charged over $500 total for his two no-show rooms.
It sucks, and it’s a lot of money, but it’s 100% his fault. The gentleman called me a couple of weeks later when he got his credit card bill. I explained to him our policy and that he wouldn’t be getting a refund. He went off. “You don’t know who you’re messing with,” he told me. “I’m not paying you, idiot.” Eventually, he told me he was just going to dispute it with his credit card company.
This is basically what I said to him: “If you want to dispute the charge with your bank, you have every right to do that. I would not personally recommend it though. If this was a case of a stolen credit card, I would agree with you, but we have documentation showing you were informed of the no-show policy. However, if you wish to pass this issue along to the bank, I will gladly deal with them.”
When you dispute a charge, the bank will front you the money while they investigate. When he got money from the bank right after he filed a dispute, he called me to GLOAT. He told me how stupid I was, etc. What I don’t think he understood is that the money is pretty much a loan, under the assumption that his charges really were genuine…which they weren’t.
I easily won the dispute, proving that he wilfully did purchase these rooms and that he was informed of the no-show policy. Then the bank billed him back for the money they fronted him. He called me again. Lucky me. He told me that the bank was billing him and that I had to pay it. He claimed that because it all started with my hotel, it was our responsibility to pay his bank bill.
At this point, I didn’t even know what more to say. I just said, “No, have a good day” and hung up. Later on, he called AGAIN, saying that his credit card company was threatening to turn over the bill to collections if he didn’t pay. Now he wanted us to pay $800 because of the interest. I told him that his personal finances were his own business and to stop calling. I tried to warn him in the beginning.
92. Fast And Fresh
So, where I work we have the option for people to pre-order food from their phone because I guess that’s the way it is nowadays; everybody wants everything fast. The system is kind of messed up, though, because sometimes they call in for the food and pop in five seconds after as if they ordered from the parking lot. So it obviously won’t be ready yet.
Anyways, this lady did exactly that, but thankfully it was a really small order so I started preparing it immediately. She walked up and I’m guessing it took me about 30 seconds too long, so she starts going “HELLLLLLOOOO!?” like three or four times. I walk over, smile at her, and give her the stuff. She then starts yelling at me as if I’m her child.
She’s yelling something like “THIS ORDER WAS ON-THE-GO WHICH MEANS IT SHOULD BE READY THE MOMENT I GET HERE SO NEXT TIME DO YOUR JOB AND HAVE IT READY.” This was out of character for me because I’m the nicest guy if you’re nice to me, but I kind of just looked in her direction and tiredly murmured, “Screw off.” She started flipping out and yelling more.
“EXCUSE ME!? EXCUSE ME!? WHAT’S YOUR NAME?” I lied and gave her a fake one. She told me to get a manager. I went and got the manager, and at this point I was enraged. I briefly explained what happened, and when my manager got over there the lady started being rude to her, saying things like, “Oh, he WILL be fired. I can guarantee that.”
She called corporate and all the managers and owners got involved. I talked with the owner on the phone, and the owner was only upset that I lied about my name. The owner was saying things like, “In the future, this is how you handle it,” so I assume I still have the job. She did mention that she HAS to call the lady back and apologize.
Anyway, if I get fired…my God, was it worth it. Telling this lady to screw off was the most satisfying thing I got to do all year.
93. Every Rose Has Its Thorn
I’m a florist. We had a bride and her mother show up at 9 am. They wanted to order a bridal bouquet, a mother of the bride orchid corsage, a boutonniere for the groom, and six smaller ones for the groomsmen. But there was just one thing. The wedding was scheduled for noon. Yep, three hours from then, and they wanted them ready by the time they were done with their makeup appointment at the beauty parlor a few doors down.
The bride was flipping through the sample book and pointing out the style and flowers she wanted. Think garden roses with long sweeping trails of stephanotis and variegated ivy, all three of which would require at least a week’s advanced order with our suppliers. She was absolutely gobsmacked that we didn’t carry extremely expensive and highly perishable flowers at all times.
Same with the orchid for the mom’s corsage. My boss told them that since they didn’t place an order beforehand they would be limited to what we had in stock, and simple styles that could be assembled quickly. The bride and her mom kept pointing at the book and arguing that we should have those specific flowers in stock.
My boss eventually took the book off the desk and tossed it behind the counter. The bride vacillated between tears and petulant whining that we were going to ruin her big day. My boss, who had a bone-deep loathing for brides in general, told her she had ruined her own day by not ordering her flowers before her actual wedding day.
The mom tried chewing out my boss for her lack of customer service skills. My boss told her that she was welcome to go down the street to Vons and ask their flower department to make their order with whatever they had in stock. The mom said she’d do just that, and reassured the bride that she’d have her flowers done by the time her appointment was over.
Both women stormed out. I figured that was that, but I was so wrong. My boss told me and the other girl to start on six simple corsages. Meanwhile, she threw together a ribbon-wrapped bridal bouquet with some white roses that were nearly past their prime and some. Sure enough, 20 minutes later the mother slunk back in and meekly asked if we were still able to assemble what they needed.
We did. We also charged her a very large rush fee.
94. Maybe The Butler Did It
In all my years working in the hotel industry, you know what I never saw happen? Maids stealing your stuff. Everyone always points at the maids when they lose stuff but we always—100 percent—find it. There’s no way the maids are risking their jobs over your used iPad or mall jewelry. With tips, they make pretty decent money.
95. Buy Me A Drink First
My friend is a manager at a popular tapas spot. One night she received a call from a man whose girlfriend was currently dining in, asking to send a bottle of his girlfriend’s favorite red to her table and to pay her tab over the phone. He made a point to make sure that the server knew it was from him, her boyfriend. There was a disturbing reason for this.
Turns out that the girlfriend was on a date with another man, and he knew. The server knew this, too, but told them anyway that her boyfriend had paid their tab and sent the bottle over. Apparently, “Their facial expressions and abrupt exit were priceless.” God, I wish this could’ve happened when I worked. This is the karma all servers would love to watch.
96. Sir, I’m Afraid You Are Mistaken!
At our local Red Lobster, someone once grabbed the “manager” to tell him that his shrimp was cold and that he wanted a free beer as compensation. He even went as far as to exclaim that he could get better fish by fishing. This “manager” was actually just my dad, who was there to pick me up from work, but apparently looked like an authority figure since he had a tie on.
My dad replied, “That’s cocktail shrimp, you moron!”
97. This One Takes The Cake
I worked as a wedding planner and coordinator, and one bride stands out to me because she was so inconsistent with all the vendors. She was a complete sweetheart to me during the planning phase and I never saw any of the crazy until the day of the wedding. It was honestly like a Jekyll/Hyde moment. She wanted a big wedding, around 300 people, and spent a lot of money on the venue and food and wanted the best for everything.
No complaints about paying for it either, never asked for discounts or anything like that. And since she wanted the best and seemed to have a really large budget, I referred her to a popular baker for the cake. I let her handle the logistics for the cake since I’ve worked with this baker before and never had any problems. I figured they would do the standard cake tasting, pick a design with the baker, and I would see a gorgeous masterpiece on the day of the wedding.
Well, that didn’t really work out. For some reason, she didn’t want to tell the baker that it was for a wedding. I’m guessing she read that you can save money by ordering a regular cake because some vendors will automatically add an extra charge if it’s for a wedding. By the way, this is true to some extent, but the extra charge truly is there for a reason.
Whenever something is for a wedding, the vendor puts in much more care, stresses about the timing, execution, etc. way more than usual, and often times will go all out and use premium materials or add upgrades. Not all of us are just adding extra charges for no reason. Anyways, she decided she didn’t want to pay for a wedding cake so she told the baker it was for a birthday party.
The baker asked how many people the cake would need to serve and she said “around 50.” She also didn’t want to pay the delivery fee, so she had her sister pick up the cake on the morning of the wedding and bring it to the event. At this point, it’s important to mention one huge thing. We live in Texas and this is a summer wedding.
So by the time the cake got to the venue—about six hours after it was picked up from the bakery—it didn’t look all that great anymore. Some of the decorations had melted, the cake got a little banged up in the car ride, there was icing on the inside of the box, and the entire cake was sagging on one side. It was also way too small for a wedding of her size.
I saw it and it looked like a complete disaster. But at this point, we’re about an hour away from the start of the wedding and there’s no possible way to fix this. The bride comes into the reception room with her makeup all done When she sees it, she unravels. Screaming, crying, throwing things, collapsing on the floor. Complete meltdown.
She threatens to cancel the whole wedding if we can’t fix it. We try to calm her down as much as we can and grab the makeup artist before she leaves and ask if she can help fix the bride’s makeup, which is a mess now. The bride sees herself in the mirror and has another meltdown because she ruined her hair and makeup and now wants to have the whole thing re-done.
After she gets everything done to perfection again, we’re about an hour behind schedule. I let the guests come inside the reception room to wait because it seemed cruel to force everyone to sit outside in 100-degree heat, but when the bride saw that everyone was inside she had another meltdown. She spent the entire wedding sulking with a scowl on her face, and refused to take any pictures with people.
Her new husband kept coming over to hug her and try to cheer her up, and she would either yell at him or give him the silent treatment. Most of the guests left very early because the atmosphere felt so uncomfortable. So, pretty much a waste of the $200,000 budget for a lavish wedding, all because she wanted to save a couple hundred bucks on the cake.
98. Projecting Gossip
I worked at a restaurant and the hostess was convinced I was sleeping with the owner. I was not. She was convinced the money I was using to take a vacation must have come from him and that I was hooking up with him behind his family’s back. She made things really weird and horrible for a couple of days. She told the new hires I was saying nasty things about them and made up really bad rumors about me.
I walked out of a shift after she confronted me in the storage room demanding I admit I was banging this guy. This guy who I never interacted with outside of the occasional table transfer or inventory update was bald, fat, and married, and had hardly said more than a hundred words to me beyond work instructions. After I left, I found out the dark truth. It turned out they were sleeping together and she was crazy. I’m so glad I quit.
99. Ya Done Goofed
I had JUST gotten in for my 7 am to 3 pm shift, and my night auditor had just left for home. Within the first five minutes, I had one of the worst jerks I’ve ever walk up to me and flip his lid. We’ll call him Chad. Chad came downstairs and wasn’t very nice from the start. It was like 7:05 am, and I hadn’t even had my second cup of coffee yet.
Before I continue with the tale, I just want to say that Chad yelled at me a lot. I also didn’t tell him to stop, but for a good reason. Me: “Good morn—” Chad: “YOU SERIOUSLY CHARGED ME?! WHAT THE HECK IS WRONG WITH YOU!!” Me: “I’m sorry, I’m conf—” Chad: “YOU CHARGED ME FOR THE ROOM?” Me: “Yes?” Chad: “DO YOU KNOW WHAT YOU DID?! Me: “I charged you for your stay?” Chad: “NO, YOU DESTROYED MY MARRIAGE!”
I was so confused. What the heck was this guy going on about? Chad: “YOU DESTROYED MY MARRIAGE.” Me: “…How, may I ask?” Chad: “YOU CHARGED MY CARD AND NOW MY WIFE IS GOING TO FIND OUT I WAS HERE!!!” Me: “Okay?” At that point, things were starting to click into place.
Chad: “I WAS HERE WITH A DIFFERENT WOMAN!!! WE SHARE A BANK ACCOUNT!” Me: “…I don’t see how I am at fault for you cheating on your wife?” Chad: “BECAUSE YOU CHARGED MY CARD. I NEED A REFUND RIGHT NOW.” Me: “No?” Chad: “YES, YOU NEED TO SWITCH IT TO MY AWARDS POINTS RIGHT NOW BEFORE SHE SEES THE CHARGES.” Well, I took a deep breath, because this was going to be bad.
Me: “Sir, I do not have the power to switch any reservation to a points reservation. You either have to do that online or through our reservation service. Once you are checked into the system, there is no switching to points or any way to do a refund unless for a very valid reason, and it has to be a valid reason.” Chad: “THIS IS A VALID REASON.”
Me: “Was there anything wrong with the room?” Chad: “No.” Me: “The check-in process was fine?” Chad: “Yes.” Me: “Nothing happened during your stay?” Chad: “No, it was fine!” Me: “Then why would I refund you?” Chad: “BECAUSE MY WIFE WILL KNOW I WAS HERE. THAT ISN’T MY WIFE IN THAT ROOM WITH ME, YOU KNOW.”I got really annoyed and I knew this was just going to go around in circles.
Me: “Okay dude, this is seriously your own fault. You chose to make the reservation without points, you saw the authorization go through, we charged your card for payment…You knew this would all happen. This is entirely your own fault.” Chad: “I NEED YOUR MANAGER RIGHT NOW.” Me: “No, you can call her tomorrow.”
Chad looked very confused and angry. I just slowly sipped my coffee, staring back. Chad stood at the desk for a minute, just staring at me. He then took out his phone and started playing on it. Me: “Is there anything else I can help you with?” Chad: “Yeah, a refund.” Me: “So, if that is all, I need you to please step aside so I can help the next person in line.” And then at that moment, Chad had a huge realization.
He realized the entire lobby was full of firefighters and other people waiting to get help from the front desk. At that moment, my day was made. He looked horrified because he just admitted to an entire lobby that he cheated on his wife and he was blaming me, the front desk person, for his own horrible move. That is why I didn’t have him stop yelling. After he ran out of the lobby, he never came back down. He never called the desk. He quietly left the hotel. At one point, the firefighters and other guests started asking about him. I just smiled and said, “He messed up.”
100. Outside the Terms of Your Rental Agreement (and Morality)
I worked for a downtown metropolitan hotel for a long time, and I’ve seen a lot I wasn’t supposed to see. Probably the worst was a kid with an old man. I checked this guy in at like one in the morning (not uncommon, because people travel at different times), but he was alone. Like an hour later he asked for something like a towel or blanket.
Anyway, I dispatched our runner to deliver it. Afterward, the runner comes to me and says he thinks something is wrong because he caught a glimpse of someone, and the old guy was trying hard to block the entrance. Since we were supposed to take stuff like human trafficking seriously, I asked our maintenance to cut his power so we would get a call to come up to try and fix the problem.
He does, and I go up with him to apologize for the inconvenience because the guy was also a top tier member. Sure enough, we hear a kid in the bathroom hiding. I tried to ask who the kid was, and the old guy tried everything to shut us down from throwing his status around to bribing. So I called the cops and let them deal with it.